s/o birth control 2nd thoughts

[lil_acorn]

I've got 2 wonderful children and 99% of me thinks I am done. My dh is the same way. So I set up an appt this week to get the Mirena implanted, but at the last minutes had to cancel the appointment because I wasn't sure.

I love our 2 kids and I'm so looking forward to no diapers, being able to travel, etc etc. Some days I feel like we couldn't handle another child. Plus I've got dreams of retiring & traveling with my husband and not having to deal with insane college tuition bills. But I've still got this little twinge. I don't know what to do. Help..but really just venting.

How did you finally decide you were "done"?

update - I understand the Mirena is not permanent but I'm looking at a finite time when we would want more kids. If it didn't happen this year or next, then I'd definitely be done as my youngest would be 4 by the time #3 arrived & that's just too much of a gap to get used to waking every 2 hours again! I just wouldn't want it to be put in and then go back 3-6 monhts later to have it taken out.

[sidmand]

Not to address the "done" but the Mirena isn't permanent. You can always have it removed if you decide you're not done.

I have a Mirena even though we are 99.9999% sure we are done. For us, we're on the older side; two nearly sent us over the edge, can't imagine what three would do; and not that it would have made a tremendous difference but we have one DS and one DD.

My SIL said she heard music (in her head!) when her second DD was born and just knew that her family was complete. I don't think I'm that kind of person though, but I had enough trouble convincing DH of a second. I'm good with two.

[DebbieJ]

Mirena is not permanent. Just have it put it and decide later.

[egoldber]

After the stories I have read here, I am afraid of the Mirena insertion.

[SnuggleBuggles]

I had my Paragard taken out when I wanted dc2. It was easy as can be. IUDs are good option if you are undecided.

Beth, insertion of the Paragard wasn't my favorite thing in the world but it was tolerable and only affected me for about 5-10 minutes. Worth it not to have to think about bc for 10 years!

Beth

[egoldber]

I am concerned because I have never had a vaginal birth. I hear if you haven't it's brutal.

[tarahsolazy]

I am concerned because I have never had a vaginal birth. I hear if you haven't it's brutal.

Beth, total spin off here, but I haven't had a vaginal birth either, I've never dilated past 4. I've had three Mirenas, the first was before I had any kids!

Seriously, it was about 1-2 minutes of discomfort, each time. Not fun, but no worse than having the spinal put in for my c-sections.

To the OP, I am definitely DONE. It didn't come to me as an epiphany, and a small part of me does wish for another baby. But I know that practically it won't work in our family, and I'm happy with the two I have. I guess I know because my desire for another kid is not outweighed by my knowledge that its not the right thing, for many reasons.

[sidmand]

I am concerned because I have never had a vaginal birth. I hear if you haven't it's brutal.

I have not had a vaginal birth (an emergency c-section and a scheduled c-section). And yeah, they told me I would feel "cramping." It was WAY more than cramping. I was in serious pain for a couple of days. I took ibuprofen ahead of time and did everything I was supposed to do and it was very very very painful. But really, it was only bad for a few days. I had serious doubts about it for awhile (breakthrough bleeding, not sure whether I could attribute mood swings to it) but now I really like it. No AF or very light AF is nice. And although we're pretty sure we're done, other things seemed too permanent right now. It was a good compromise at the time.