Is everyone REALLY having that much sex?

[catpagmo]

Really? After reading the doing it/sex drive threads, I'm trying not to compare, but I feel like a freak-show...and not in a good way! :)

[SnuggleBuggles]

Someone once said that you put a penny in a jar on your headboard every time you do it when you are newlyweds (newly living together, whatever). Then, after a year (or something like that) start taking the pennies out. You'll take a whole lot longer getting them out than you did in.

I am sure dh thinks we should do it more but 3-5 x/ week is ok by me. We are in a bit of a dry spell the past 3 weeks but even those weeks it is still 2-3 times/ week.

Beth

[mom_hanna]

nope. we are at about once every 2-3 weeks right now...

[Tondi G]

My DH is lucky to get some once a week... sometimes twice if everyone is feeling up to it... with all the sickness running through our household, exhaustion etc it is hard to find the time and be in the right mood. I know my DH would like it happen a lot more often!

[love_a_latte]

:yeahthat:

[zoestargrove]

not us. 2-3 times a month is about it

[g-mama]

I am sure dh thinks we should do it more but 3-5 x/ week is ok by me. We are in a bit of a dry spell the past 3 weeks but even those weeks it is still 2-3 times/ week.

Beth

Dang, girl!!

[maestramommy]

I am sure dh thinks we should do it more but 3-5 x/ week is ok by me. We are in a bit of a dry spell the past 3 weeks but even those weeks it is still 2-3 times/ week.

Beth

Yowza, woman!

I feel old :p

[LarsMal]

Nope! Maybe if M fell asleep before 11PM, but that is very rare. I am so beyond exhausted by the time everyone is down for the night that it is the LAST thing I want to do! DH feels lucky if we manage once/week.


I :bowdown: to you 2+/weekers!!!

[catpagmo]

Dang, girl!!

:yeahthat:

Well, my DH would be lucky to get some 2-3 times per MONTH. Huge, huge dry spell here. Was that TMI?

[LarsMal]

Someone once said that you put a penny in a jar on your headboard every time you do it when you are newlyweds (newly living together, whatever). Then, after a year (or something like that) start taking the pennies out. You'll take a whole lot longer getting them out than you did in.

I am sure dh thinks we should do it more but 3-5 x/ week is ok by me. We are in a bit of a dry spell the past 3 weeks but even those weeks it is still 2-3 times/ week.

Beth

WOW!!!! I think you need to change your name to "SnuggleBunny"!! You little rabbit, you! ;)

[mamicka]

Someone once said that you put a penny in a jar on your headboard every time you do it when you are newlyweds (newly living together, whatever). Then, after a year (or something like that) start taking the pennies out. You'll take a whole lot longer getting them out than you did in.

I am sure dh thinks we should do it more but 3-5 x/ week is ok by me. We are in a bit of a dry spell the past 3 weeks but even those weeks it is still 2-3 times/ week.

Beth

Wowza is right! I don't think we ever had those numbers.

Just FYI - I have found that I'm much more in the mood in the morning.

[Melaine]

On top of the whole issue with my meds, I am currently on Day TEN of AF. My cycle has been short, like 24 days the last couple months. I don't know WHAT is going on. The doctor said that the Prozac should help regulate my cycle, but if this is what he meant I am not impressed.
So, if I am having 14 AF-free days a month, we are lucky if we do it 4 or 5 times during that span.

[boolady]

WOW!!!! I think you need to change your name to "SnuggleBunny"!! You little rabbit, you! ;)

Ha! Kudos to anyone who thinks that only 2x per week is a "dry spell." I always thought DH and I were doing okay, but the threads on this board do get one thinking...

[trales]

We are in the "did another month really just go by" category.

[daisymommy]

You know it's bad when even your DH apologizes and says that he is just too old and tired lately ;)

[mamicka]

Someone needs to post a poll.

Fairy, where are you?

[egoldber]

Kudos to anyone who thinks that only 2x per week is a "dry spell."

:yeahthat:

We are definitely in the once a week is doing well category. DH's travel schedule and the fact that I get up at 5 every week day has not helped either!

[SnuggleBuggles]

Ok, feeling kind of slutty and rabbit like now. :)

Try morning quickies. They still count can be fit nicely into the schedule. ;)

Beth

[edurnemk]

Well, I'm feeling like a freak, too. I'm not even going to admit how long our dry spells have lasted. And even before that, I think once a week was the most, with rare exceptions.

I guess neither of use has a big sex drive and having demanding jobs doesn't help.

We are in the "did another month really just go by" category.
:yeahthat:

[Kymberley]

I'm too embarassed to say how long it's been. Let's just go with: it's been much longer than anything posted so far!

[pinkmomagain]

Another once a weeker here. Ideally it would be nice 2-3x a week-- not that my libido dictates that (although I wish it would) -- but it would be nice to have that intimacy more than once a week.

[catpagmo]

I'm too embarassed to say how long it's been. Let's just go with: it's been much longer than anything posted so far!

You're not the only one.

[egoldber]

We've had spells where is was MUCH longer than that. I was on "pelvic rest" when I was pregnant with younger DD and then after she was born early and I was sleep deprived for about the first year.....yeah not much happening in that time frame....

[lchang25000]

You're not the only one.

Me 3!!! :bag

[boolady]

Ok, feeling kind of slutty and rabbit like now. :)

Oh, I hope I didn't make you feel that way. Seriously, kudos. I'm impressed!

[edurnemk]

Me 3!!! :bag

I'm definetely part of this group... seriously, as I said before, I will not admit how long it's been.

[citymama]

Try morning quickies. They still count can be fit nicely into the schedule. ;)

Beth

Definitely impressed with the 3-5 x week rate - wow! And with 2 kids! :bowdown:

I take it your littles don't come into your room for early morning snuggles? ;) Ours is in bed with us by 5.30 latest every morning - definitely no morning quickies happening here!

[Jo]

DH gets pissy if we go more than a week. Plus, I can get him to do TONS of chores with the promise of sex. So once or twice per week here. When I was pregnant or BF, it was almost never (less than once per month).

[nfceagles]

Another too long to admit vote here.

[AnnieW625]

I think we are in the 2-3 x week a category. Saturday/Sunday afternoons while DD naps has been our savior and I honestly don't know what we are going to do when she gives up her naps:shake:. We've been through numerous dry spells before (not counting six weeks post partum x 2) and we spent a lot of time apart (I counted it up once and I figured that we spent more time living in different parts of the state than we did living in the same county/household until just after our second wedding anniversary and we'd been a couple for 7 yrs. by then!) so sometimes we just get used to the not so much but we get seriously punchy if we go more than 2-3 weeks.

[veronica]

Oh Yeah.....we are about 2-3 x per day. About as often as I shine the hardwood floors here:wink2:

[bigpassport]

Here's a common conversation in our house:

DH: We haven't done it this month.
Me: We haven't?
DH: No.
Me: Are you sure? Didn't we do it...
DH: That was last month.

[SASM]

Another 2-3x/month here. Sadly, we have definitely gone A LOT longer, though. The older our kids get, the crazier our schedules get. I am completely wiped out by the end of the day...and I am a SAHM. :( I WILL say that we just recently discovered the lock on our door and morning quickies...LOVE those! So...we might actually be able to up the # to 1-2x week!! Sad, I know. That # is soooo much better than what it was just 3 months ago.

[gatorsmom]

No, not by a long shot. Things for us were like Snugglebunny-good, until the twins came along. Now it's like every couple of weeks. Well, until Dad got sick and DH traveling so much since January, now it's like once per month. I am just exhausted mentally, physically and emotionally. And dH and I want it at different times, which certainly doesn't help.

I keep telling DH it's just a phase. Once the kids are in college, I'm sure things will improve. LOL

[Momof3Labs]

Here's a common conversation in our house:

DH: We haven't done it this month.
Me: We haven't?
DH: No.
Me: Are you sure? Didn't we do it...
DH: That was last month.

That's us when things are good, almost verbatim, except reverse the "DH" and "Me".

Now, our current dry spell has been far too long, and neither of us seems to care.

[Meatball Mommie]

Here's a common conversation in our house:

DH: We haven't done it this month.
Me: We haven't?
DH: No.
Me: Are you sure? Didn't we do it...
DH: That was last month.

:yeahthat: I swear we've had this very conversation!!! It's so nice to know that I'm not alone... not proud of it though...low low sex drive here:bag

[Twoboos]

Here's a common conversation in our house:

DH: We haven't done it this month.
Me: We haven't?
DH: No.
Me: Are you sure? Didn't we do it...
DH: That was last month.

:yeahthat:

Honestly, I think we had this conversation a couple of days ago.

[mom2binsd]

We are in the "did another month really just go by" category.

Thank goodness we're not alone..

[catpagmo]

OP here. Well, this has been a very enlightening thread! Thanks for your honesty on this. I don't feel quite as "freakish" anymore...well, except when I read SnuggleBuggle's reply. lol :)

[niccig]

Another once a weeker here. Ideally it would be nice 2-3x a week-- not that my libido dictates that (although I wish it would) -- but it would be nice to have that intimacy more than once a week.

We would both like to have sex more often, but we're tired. Often it's a fumble, fumble, "I'm interested, but.." "yes, I'm tired too, maybe in the morning." Then DS hops in our bed in the morning and it's "maybe tonight we will."

[ewpmsw]

You're not the only one.

Not by far. I'm happy for the ones who are getting it on, though.

[wendmatt]

Lucky if it's once a month, it's been waaaaayyyyy longer than that lately. DH is the one with low sex drive and I kind of just get used to not doing it. Sometimes gets me really down though.

[newg]

We're 1-2x a week at most.

[tylersmama]

Will I make you all feel better if I tell you my dry spell is going on three YEARS? Ok, sure, I have an excuse, but still! :p

[JoyNChrist]

Yowza, woman!

I feel old :p

We're in the "doing good if it's once a week" camp, and we're in our 20's. I'm not old, I'm just TIRED. ;)

[jgenie]

I'm too embarassed to say how long it's been. Let's just go with: it's been much longer than anything posted so far!

:yeahthat:

[WatchingThemGrow]

WAAY tired here, plus he's on the early to be/outta bed by 5 track. Also, I'm totally scared of getting PG. If we could agree on some form of bc, we'd at least be doing it. One joke about pricking a hole in a condom made me abstain for nearly a month. Can.not.have.another.baby. No way.

[bubbaray]

Not so much here. Just waaaaaay too tired and exhausted. Frankly, it just isn't a priority right now.

[BelleoftheBallFlagstaff]

Not so much here,either. I am just not that into DH right now to be brutally honest. Not a total lack of sex drive, but a lack of one for DH, and I feel so mean for it!:bag

[Piglet]

To the ladies with low sex drive, I have two words... red wine (lots of it). We accidentally discovered after a Christmas party that alcohol is a fantastic turn-on. Guess what DH is always offering me to drink while I watch TV, LOL!?

[jgenie]

To the ladies with low sex drive, I have two words... red wine (lots of it). We accidentally discovered after a Christmas party that alcohol is a fantastic turn-on. Guess what DH is always offering me to drink while I watch TV, LOL!?

Works for me too - unfortunately I've been pregnant or nursing for the last three years and hope to be nursing for another 15 months. :sulkoff:

[Globetrotter]

Plus, I can get him to do TONS of chores with the promise of sex.

I am :D with envy. I wish I had that sort of power in our relationship because I have a whole list of house projects that need to be done (but we never get to).

We are approx. once a week, but that is after we hit a real low point.
We once went for 1.5 years (it was terribly painful due to post partum changes).

[belovedgandp]

Wow, I guess we are in the freakish category. I'd say 10-12 times per month. We have great weeks and OK weeks.

I do know that we both start getting snippy with each other after about a 5-7 day drought. We just need to squeeze it in for both of our sanity even if it's not perfect timing or anything fantastic.

[funda62]

not us. 2-3 times a month is about it

:yeahthat: And that would be an active month.

[fumofu]

2-3x/month for us. DH and I don't remember the last time we've had sex - our post-coital activity is trying to remember, usually without success. It's probably been less now that we're expecting and he's been traveling for work.

Saturday mornings are good times for us coz DH finally catches up on his shut-eye. He feels bad because he has a lower sex drive than I do, plus he's stressed about work (but that's what the vibrator's for!).

I can't imagine how it would be after we have a kid...

[MoJo]

Twice per week is our typical (and has been for years).

[SnuggleBuggles]

To the ladies with low sex drive, I have two words... red wine (lots of it). We accidentally discovered after a Christmas party that alcohol is a fantastic turn-on. Guess what DH is always offering me to drink while I watch TV, LOL!?

My dh came home from the store once with a box of wine for me. He was thinking the same thing. ;)

Beth

[pinkmomagain]

[QUOTE=Piglet;2686028]To the ladies with low sex drive, I have two words... red wine (lots of it). [QUOTE]

Oh, I love me some red wine, but it just puts me to sleep (maybe cause I'm over 40?). Wish it had this effect on me!

[wendibird22]

Hmm...let's see...DD2 is almost 3mos, plus 9mos of pregnancy...yeah, I think we did it a couple of times during that time span. So yeah, we are on the quarterly system I guess. I tired. I'm breastfeeding. I'm working full time and taking care of an infant and toddler. Right now the biggest turn on is clean sheets and a good night's sleep.

Of course, DH is tired of having his advances shot down so now he won't initiate physical contact at all..not a hug, not a kiss, nothing. Um that's not exactly gonna help me find the motivation.

[PAfirsttimemom]

You're not the only one.

I'm there with you.

[egoldber]

To the ladies with low sex drive, I have two words... red wine (lots of it).

Oh gosh yes, we are all about the acohol. :ROTFLMAO:

[jse107]

We're in the 2-3 times a week category. To be honest, I'm hardly ever in the mood and I certainly don't climax (sorry TMI) 98% of the time. However, I know it's so important to DH so for me, a lot of it is helping him feel good.

[edurnemk]

Oh, yeah, the wine helps. The problem is that if I'm tired (90% of the time), a glass of wine will put me to sleep ASAP, and not just red wine. Hence, we are still in the "did another month just go by" category.

[MamaSnoo]

We are in the "did another month really just go by" category.

:wink2:....this was us for the longest time after DD! Our New Year's resolution this year was sex every month, at least once. We are finally getting the hang of it, and i have to say that I like it! Both of us had a really hard time with libido while pregnant, and after.

[smiles33]

I was going to avoid posting in this thread because it might be too shocking. Other than maybe 1-2 times after discovering I was pregnant (DH gets skeeved out when I'm pregnant), we tried a couple times after birth but it really hurt me even with artificial lubrication. That's maybe 4 attempts in the last YEAR AND A HALF. :47:


We're both exhausted and sleep-deprived, I'm nursing so I don't drink alcohol (which I agree, DOES help me relax and get into it!), and DH has had some minor health problems. Still, that is pretty outrageous....I feel terrible about this missing component from our lives, but my thread on getting your sex drive back led me to Astroglide. It works! So maybe it will be back up to at least once or twice/month. I can't even fathom once/week, let alone more often.

[elektra]

I was going to avoid posting in this thread because it might be too shocking.
Me too. Still avoiding actually.

ETA. Well I guess this does technically count as a post though huh? ;)

[edurnemk]

I was going to avoid posting in this thread because it might be too shocking... That's maybe 4 attempts in the last YEAR AND A HALF. :47:


What's shocking is that this is not shocking to me.

[ourbabygirl]

Oh, yeah. If I could just be allowed not to do it for a good year and a half, I would LOVE it! We're going on about a trimester now, basically since the day or so before I found out I was pregnant w/this one (day before Valentine's Day). Weird thing is, I dream about it sometimes (including last night/ this morning), but don't have the urge for it when I'm awake!

[maestramommy]

To the ladies with low sex drive, I have two words... red wine (lots of it). We accidentally discovered after a Christmas party that alcohol is a fantastic turn-on. Guess what DH is always offering me to drink while I watch TV, LOL!?

Actually, alcohol has the opposite effect. Not that it slows down the drive, but it blunts the response. Or maybe I'm just too old, and it makes me sleepy! So I try not to drink too much (or at all) on certain nights:loveeyes:

[brgnmom]

I think I may be similar to Snugglebunny ;), although I do notice that my morning sickness and nausea have made it more difficult for me to be in the mood as often as before. my DH and I still manage to about 3-4 times per week. He notices if there's a 2-day lapse.

[firsttimemama]

Our son has been a horrible sleeper from birth, which is how we wound up cosleeping (and then eventually realized we want our baby/toddler in the room with us, anyway). In addition to the usual run of sleep issues he is also a night owl. So lack of "alone time" (and plenty of exhaustion on both sides) has really wrecked us in this dept.

The answer to the question is.. I don't even know. I don't keep track. If I thought about it really hard, I could figure it out, but I don't want to think about it.