View Full Version : mustache
04-15-2012, 10:54 PM
9 yo dd has just told me that she gets teased at school for having a mustache. She has fairly dark hair and she does have hair on her upper lip. Should I just do nothing and tell her to ignore the meanies or maybe get some bleach and try to lighten the hair? I've never used hair lightening cream, is it a danger of burning such young sensitive skin? She would never let me wax it as she hates pain! I don't want her to be uncomfortable with teasing. Girls are so mean! Any advice?
04-15-2012, 10:58 PM
Awww, your poor DD. I'm so sorry. Kids are so cruel. I still remember a mean boy told a friend of mine in junior high, "You really need to shave." The irony is that she did shave but had really dark hair.
I have never bleached before, so I can't give advice but perhaps you can try it yourself so you could then help your 9 year old do it. I know it's a bit young, but kids are cruel and a bad nickname could linger until high school.
04-15-2012, 11:15 PM
I had mustache until mid-20s when I finally did something about it and I went the permanent route with electrolysis. I have dark brown, almost black hair, and olive skin, typical for Mediterranian type. I've never tried bleaching as IMHO light jair looks weird on someone with darker skin color, plus I would still had had a mustache, just a blond one. And I did not want to deal with growing out hairs/stubble from waxing or shaving. At this day and age I would have used laser.
In your daughter's case I'd do nothing and work on building character. Mean girls would always find a reason to pick on you, if not for a mustache, then for something else (I also had a unibrow and unusually straight back-feet in 1st position walk from years of dancing, that I got comments on).
04-15-2012, 11:50 PM
I have three daughters. When they started complaining about their leg hair (maybe around age 11) I let them shave. Nine seems young, but if she has very dark hair that is quite noticeable...and if she is unhappy with it...I'd bleach it for her.
04-16-2012, 12:06 AM
I have had a mustache issue as long as I can remember. I wax it, its painful but it improves and it makes it go away the longest. I occasionally use nair but its not as successful at removing thicker hairs and it can burn the skin. I've never bleached it as mine is enough it would probably look worse. If I need a quick fix I do occasionally use a razor. It lasts several days especially on the finer hairs. If her hair is fine it may work just to shave it occasionally.
I was teased about it too as a kid and I wouldnt tell her just to ignore it. Its not hard to fix it so I would definately just remove/bleach the stache and hope the meanies move on.
04-16-2012, 12:15 AM
I'd use wax strips on it. The kind that you just run between your hands to warm up. You just need one strip per side and your done. Super fast, barely hurts (and will hurt less next time since there should be less and finer hair). I like the Nad's or Parissa brand, both of which can be found at Target, CVS, etc.
04-16-2012, 12:39 AM
I wouldn't bleach it. It will still be somewhat noticeable under the best of circumstances, and on some complexions, could look even worse.
If you're concerned about the pain of waxing (which is minor for such a small area), then I would just use a depilatory cream like Nair. Easy, painless, effective. And you can get it in sensitive skin formula.
And yes, I personally would let a 9 year old remove obvious facial hair.
04-16-2012, 12:49 AM
Don't bleach it, it will be just as noticeable.
Either use a cream facial hair remover, Sally Hansen has one that is very gentle,OR get one of those small thin trimmers by Clio, they are very effective, I used to use the cream remover, but I use the Clio one and it's much less abrasive on my upper lip. They are about 7.99 and come in cute designs.
I think it's quite all right to remove facial hair that is making a child uncomfortable. Our friends DD had the worst Unibrow and thick bushy brows and they started waxing at age 9, it was fine and the little girl was much happier.
My DD has the hariest arms and legs, so bad that last summer the sunscreen was all goopy and a mess in her hair...so we removed her hair (the arm hair literally wrapped around her forearm- her dad is very hairy too...). AND it has not grown back thicker/coarser/etc.
04-16-2012, 06:11 AM
I think I was 9 or 10 when I went to my mom about my arm hair. She talked o me about loving myself, blah, blah, blah and then, because she didn't do anything about the hair, I shaved it. And ended up with at least one ingrown hair. So I'd vote for talking about how she is beautiful etc AND helping her to control her appearance a bit. I also wouldn't suggest bleaching as it just turns the hair a funny color. Wax at home or take her to get it threaded.
Aw. I'm sorry. Kids can be so mean.
I would suggest threading as well. Quick and easy, and no pain after the first time. cleaner than other methods.
Good luck, hope your DD gets over the kids' meanness
Bleaching would've been ok, but sometimes in sunlight etc. the light shines off light hair and shows up even more.
04-16-2012, 07:37 AM
In my experience, threading really hurts. I used to do it but have switched to this:
04-16-2012, 07:38 AM
I think I was around 10 when I started bleaching mine. I am very fair skinned so bleaching worked very well unless it was summertime and I had some color on my face. As the years progressed though, I had to stop bleaching because the hair was just too thick!
I do it all to remove mine...wax, pluck, shave. It's a dream of mine to some day have it permanently removed.
I completely agree that you should let her get rid of it. Kids are cruel.
04-16-2012, 08:24 AM
I would let her get rid of it. I would probably choose the wax strips instead of nair or the like. Mean kids suck.
04-16-2012, 09:53 AM
Thanks all, she does have a unibrow too, poor thing, but the teasing hasn't started for that yet I don't think! I used to be an esthetician so could easily wax it all but I found upperlip to be more painful than underarms, bikini, and legs put together on me! She is a wimp and cries at brushing her hair, so I know she won't go for that. I'll try the cream remover I guess. I see what you mean about the light hair being noticable. She doesn't care about appearance (total tom boy) but doesn't like to be teased, so telling her she is beautiful doesn't cut it with her, even though I do tell her that as well. Maybe I'll wax it while she's sleeping :)
04-16-2012, 09:55 AM
i think around 10 i started shaving/waxing. black/dark brown mustache/legs/underarms. i was a little older when i started waxing down there. but yes, unfortunately i come from a long line of hairy women and that was very apparent to cruel kids also
04-16-2012, 10:04 AM
Somebody here recommended the REM spring and it is awesome. I think it would be the best bet for a 9yo. It hurts the first time, but for not really for maintenance, and certainly not more than waxing. She can also avoid the embarrassment of going into a shop to do it.
04-16-2012, 10:05 AM
Oh, gosh, I really feel for your DD. This was (is!) me, and my mom didn't really help me with it until I was older (high school).
I can already see that DD1 (who is only 7) is going to need help sooner rather than later, she has very dark hair and very fair skin, and clearly has the beginnings of a mustache. Her leg hair is also very noticeable. But until she asks I'm going to ignore it, obviously.
If it were me and my DD1, I'd try the hair removal cream first. I break out terribly with wax strips - the cream doesn't work at all for me, though, because the hair is so coarse, so I use them anyway. But I wouldn't want to chance that the wax would make her break out if the cream works on her finer hair.
Good luck! (Oh, and I agree with all the PP. Mean girls suck.)
04-16-2012, 10:57 AM
I knew a girl in high school who was Italian I think . She had very dark curly hair and had olive toned skin. I remember once seeing the skin on her face was lighter in some places. I think she bleached her upper lip and maybe the sides of her face where the hair comes in front of your ears. Anyways, it bleached her skin too and was very noticeable. So I probably wouldnt bleach it. But if it were my DD, I would let her do something about it. Probably wax it. I dont know what threading is though. So maybe threading (whatever that is!)? But I would let her change it. It stinks that kids are so mean.
04-16-2012, 11:07 AM
...I dont know what threading is though. So maybe threading (whatever that is!)? But I would let her change it. It stinks that kids are so mean.
This is a good explanation of what threading is:
FWIW, I've tried those wax strips on upper-lip hair before and I didn't have much luck. Of course, I was in my 20s before I realized they existed, so YMMV.
Kids at 9 & 10 are real jerks sometimes.
04-16-2012, 11:31 AM
my DD has had a really noticeable unibrow since she was like 2. She first got made fun of for it at age 3. It's really *that* noticeable. Very dark, bushy eyebrows from her grandfather. She's a blonde, so it's all the more noticeable with her blonde hair and fair skin. Anyway, when she was about 4 I started using "the finishing touch" trimmer. It's completely and totally painless and only takes a second. she doesn't mind it at all and says it tickles a bit. I've been doing it ever since. I have to do it maybe once every two weeks, so it hasn't seemed to make the hair grow in faster or more thick. I figure we'll keep using it until she gets old enough to want her eyebrows truly shaped and then we'll wax them. I was waxing mine in high school...
04-16-2012, 12:58 PM
I would let her get rid of it. I once knew an Indian woman who had a full blown mustache!
I will let dd get rid of embarrassing facial hair, but she is a wimp so I think it will have to be chemically removed with a formula for extra sensitive skin, though I hate depilatory creams! I shave mine since it's just the remnants of laser removal.. Fine hair is remaining. I don't do it very often and it doesn't make it coarse. I might consider using a fine shaver to remove hers, after some research. I got a battery operated one from ulta, meant for this purpose.
04-16-2012, 01:23 PM
i personally would not do threading. i've been having my eyebrows threaded every 2 or 3 weeks for years and i stillthink it hurts a lot each time. i could only imagine that the upper lip might hurt even more.
i would totally do something to help her remove it though. mean kids sucks. :hug:
04-16-2012, 06:00 PM
As someone who has tried waxing and cream hair removal, let me really emphasize how EASY, CHEAP and PAIN FREE these little facial hair trimmers are, just google clio facial hair trimmer and lots of options come up. I can't tell you how many years I have tried to figure out the best way. Regrowth is no faster than any of the other methods but there is no redness like with waxing or creams.
04-16-2012, 06:05 PM
For her age, I think I'd do one of those little facial hair trimmers. She's so young, I don't think it would grow back thicker. Then, when she gets older, she can choose waxing, threading, or bleaching for herself. At this age, I think bleaching would be too stingy, stinky, and waxing and threading might be too painful. I'd definitely do something about it if it's bothering her.
04-16-2012, 06:24 PM
So the little facial hair trimmers don't make it grow back thicker? (even on grown ups?)
I do the wax strips, but I hate them. I am afraid of a cream being too harsh... But I am afraid that I will look like a man if I use a trimmer...
(sorry about your dd, OP. I would also try to take care of the facial hair with her)
04-16-2012, 06:45 PM
Shaving doesn't actually cause hair to become coarser. It may appear that way due to the blunt ends. I use one of those facial trimmers and it hasn't made my hair coarser. The first time I had to do it before laser treatment and it was a freaky feeling as I had to shave my entire face! It really isn't a big deal, and worst case it grows out and you can switch to another method if you don't like it. Absolutely no permanent effect! Just be careful to avoid ingrown hairs and cuts. Go slow and use some shaving cream.
04-16-2012, 07:26 PM
Right, but I don't want my facial hair to appear thicker either, kwim? So does it look thicker or does it look the same as waxing when it grows back?
04-16-2012, 07:40 PM
Right, but I don't want my facial hair to appear thicker either, kwim? So does it look thicker or does it look the same as waxing when it grows back?
I understand :)
I don't think it looks thicker. I would try it and see if you're okay with it, but what i meant to say is dont be afraid to try. In fact, I started shaving my arms instead of waxing and have seen no difference, except i think it grows back faster than waxing as waxing plucks it from the roots whereas shaving is superficial.
04-17-2012, 12:07 AM
Someone posted about Moom in the bikini thread (Healthy You forum) so I happened to see it it TJ Maxx today and picked some up. It is organic so it shouldn't be as harsh as some of the other hair removers. I think it's like a wax but gentler? I haven't tried it so I can't really say how well it works but it might be something to consider.
04-17-2012, 01:20 AM
I've been loving the "Forever Free" facial hair trimmer from QVC. It's 19.99 totally painless and leaves my upper lip as smooth as waxing. Yes, it grows in quicker than waxing because it doesn't remove the hair from the root, but it's so easy and painless I don't mind doing a touch up weekly. I'd try that for her!
04-17-2012, 07:04 AM
If a person has dark hair and pale skin, shaving will lead to a 5 o'clock shadow. Removal from the root (waxing, plucking, threading) are better options.
04-17-2012, 09:10 AM
My mom tried helping me bleach my lip when I was in 5th grade, but it stung my skin. I ultimately end up waxing, or shaving. If she is not liking the painful part I would go with trying bleach or shaving or depilatory. Leave it up to her if she wants to get rid of it, but I don't blame her for not wanting to be teased. Avon used to make a facial depilatory stick.
04-17-2012, 02:01 PM
Yes---PLEASE help her remove the facial hair. My mom didn't help me, so I finally helped myself in highschool. Got some Nair and had the worst burning and scarring in my face. I didn't go to school for about a week while I waited for it to heal and become less noticeable. It really damaged my self-image as a girl to have such noticeable facial hair.
Bleaching was not good because as another person mentioned, it's REALLY noticeable in the sun. Waxing was the easiest, and after the first time, hardly hurt. Trick is to pull the skin really taut first.
Finally, the only lasting thing for me was 6 spread out laser treatments about 10 years ago when I was in college. :cheerleader1: Apart from a few new hairs that sprouted due to pregnancy, no more unsightly facial hair! :yay: I have medium skin and dark hair and even with that combo the laser treatment was so effective! I had laser on my legs, arms, and bikini area. One of the best things I did for my self-image!
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