sigh...more mother troubles

[sntm]

now it's about the silly shopping cart cover -- she was going to buy me the clean shopper, i looked at a bunch and finally decided i liked the snazzy baby. i told her, she didn't see why i didn't want the clean shopper with the zoo print, i said i prefered the sushi print and then bought it myself and she said it was ugly, that all their fabrics were ugly, and who was it for anyway, me or jack?

can't deal with this anymore! i used to get along great with my mom and now anytime i dsagree with her about anything related to jack, i'm being selfish and stubborn!

jack's sick now and i'm actually keeping it a secret because i know she'll blame it on his not wearing a hat enough! it couldn't possibly be the dozen germy people who held him over thanksgiving!!!

and on another subject, why does jack have to get sick when i have an abstract due today, a presentation tomorrow and a paper due at the end of the week!



shannon
not-even-pregnant-yet-overachiever
trying-to-conceive :)
PREGNANT! EDD 6/9/03
mama to Jack 6/6/03

[McQ]

Argh. Mothers. When mine acts up, I some times have to take a deep breath and think, I will not act like this to my child, I will not act like this to my child...

So sorry to hear Jack is sick and that you have so much on your plate this week. Hugs.

Allison
~ mommy to Declan 3.24.03

[amp]

Hugs!

[nohomama]

Shannon,

Man-oh-man! Sometimes parents can be the biggest pain in the rear!

We spent a week this summer with all of Dan's family (we were getting together to memorialize his grandmother who past away last Thanksgiving) and I overheard his aunt and cousin bickering about something to do with his cousin's child. Finally, in an exasperated voice Tracey, his cousin, blurted out, "Mom, I'm the Mother and your the Grandmother. I get to make this decission and set the rules, not you!" I immediately filed that response away for future use.

I've no idea what your relationship with your Mom is like but I'd tell you to tell it to her strait. Since this is a hell week for you, I'd advise holding off at least until the weekend, but I'd encourage you to do it at some point. Don't wait until the next arguement. People have a hard time being receptive to anything when they're angry. Tell her you understand that she disagrees with your choices about how Jack should be cared for but that as the parent, your the one who gets to make those decissions. Does she really think she's raised a person who wouldn't have their child's best interest at heart??? She got to raise you on her own terms and now you get to do the same with your own kid. Period.

As for the shopping cart cover, Oiy! Good for you for getting what you wanted. I'm right there with you on getting things for the babe that I find estethically pleasing. She may find the sushi print ugly (NOT!) but she's not the one who'll be using the thing. If the gift has to be what she wants, it's not much of a gift. If she insists on getting the Clean Shopper, I'd be brutally honest and tell her it's going straight to the closet.

And the next time she tells you to put a hat on Jack or he'll catch a cold, tell her it's germs that make people sick, not the temperature.

[houseof3boys]

Wooh. I second Sarah's response! Tell her that you really like the fact that the snazzy is chenille on one side so it's like getting 2 in one and none of the other brands offer that.

And you know the sushi print is awesome so ignore her comments!

Sorry the little guy is sick and I hope he gets better soon. :)

[starrynight]

My mom is like that too. *hugs* I must say a hundred times a year "you raised your kids the way you wanted, now let me raise mine". It shuts her up for about 2 days LOL. I'm glad you got what you liked!

[dogmom]

I have no idea what you Mom's relationship was like with her Mother, MIL or your father when you were a baby. But a general rule of thumb is life changing events tend to bring up old stuff that was never dealt with. Maybe she's just projecting things that were told to her or expected of her when you young. Of course that is her "stuff" to deal with, not yours, but sometimes I find it helpful to find out where "stuff" is coming from. Is there an aunt or someone else that would be a good sympathetic ear for you and know your Mom well enought to talk to her for you?

Jeanne
Mom to Harvey
1/16/03

[sntm]

My mother has always had a strained relationship with her mother (she blames her mother for her failure to BF me), and always made us promise we would keep her from becoming her mother. Guess what? That's exactly what's happening. But if you say anything she gets so upset and denies it. Sigh. Most of the time we get along great -- talk on the phone all the time, etc. But she gets a fix on something and just becomes impossible. It's completely blown over now, and we are back to chatting all the time, but I feel like I'm just waiting for the next big issue (my guess? that we can't come down for X-mas until Tuesday night.)


shannon
not-even-pregnant-yet-overachiever
trying-to-conceive :)
PREGNANT! EDD 6/9/03
mama to Jack 6/6/03