Hoping for advice on this. My grandparents are getting on in years, and my mother and her sister and brother have a tendency to fight and to see the worst intentions in one another.

So far, my grandparents have not made any plans for their belongings in terms of who gets what. I know that if nothing is determined ahead of their passing, a huge family feud will erupt. (My mom claims she wants nothing and will let her siblings take everything, but I know that when it happens, she'll feel differently -- and even so, she'd get sucked into their disputes.)

Has anyone experienced or heard about a fair and reasonable way to deal with this before the fact, in order to keep family peace during a stressful, mournful time? Or a sane way to divide things up after a death?

This really is not about getting the most items, it's about keeping the peace. There's only one thing I want (an old photo album, worth no money but special to me) and I've already been told I will get it.

Thanks so much!