Page 1 of 2 1 2 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 15

Thread: Santa's gifts?

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    .
    Posts
    128

    Default Santa's gifts?

    Does anyone have a good strategy for managing the question: Why does Santa give really big presents to some kids and really modest presents to others (such as our kids!)?

  2. #2
    ha98ed14 is offline Diamond level (5000+ posts)
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Location
    Between the Ocean and the Desert
    Posts
    7,239

    Default RE: Santa's gifts?

    This is just my opinion and I am sure there will be plenty who do not agree with me, but I think you should just tell DC the truth: That it's mommies and daddies who do the gift buying and they do as much for their children as they can, but not everyone can afford big gifts.

    I think we owe it to our children to be as honest with them as possible given their age and ability to understand. If you can afford to keep up the Santa act, then there is nothing wrong with it. But when kids are old enough to notice that their cousin/ friend/ playmate got more for Christmas than they did AND it causes them to be be unsatisfied with their own gifts, I think it is time to level with them.

    I am a very practical person and not sentimental in the least, but I can understand why someone does not want to tell their young child that Santa isn't real. But I look at it this way-- In this life there will be disappointment. We cannot protect our kids from it forever. There will be a friend who is mean to them, a job they don't get, a college they don't get into, but teaching them HOW to cope with these disappointments is our real gift to them; teaching them to see the beauty and good in life even in the face of disappointment and let down. The best news is that they have a mommy and/ or a daddy who love them SO much! And that is the best present ever.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Location
    .
    Posts
    178

    Default RE: Santa's gifts?

    "Santa just loves some kids more than others."

    Just kidding.

    I think the way I would handle it would be to discuss "fairness" versus "sameness." As my mother always said, I can't treat all my kids the same, but I treat them all fairly. Santa does the same thing, and while a child might not think Santa is being "fair," Santa gets to decide what is fair, not them.

    Alternatively, I'd probably just burst their bubble and tell them the truth. The whole Santa thing has become just too commercially and materially orientated. Santa should not be considered a personal shopper for the under-10 set.

  4. #4
    hardysmom is offline Sapphire level (2000+ posts)
    Join Date
    May 2002
    Location
    .
    Posts
    2,456

    Default RE: Santa's gifts?

    OK, am one of those mom who thinks that believing in Santa is one of the great joys of childhood. I believed totally in Santa at 5, became agnostic at 6, and had serious doubts by 7. I don't remember that transition to be tramatic, nor did is shake my faith in my parents truthfulness (or should I say truthiness?)...

    When we visited Disney last year, my 5.5 yr old believed that Mickey was real (though he had doubts about Jo Jo). He is also fairly certain that the Justice League is somewhere around Six Flags Over texas because he saw Flash and Batman there last summer. He is a smart kid who just wants to believe.

    Anyway, point is, unless it was a HUGE issue driven by my kids (as opposed to me worring that they were thinking such things) I wouldn't mess with their belief in Santa.

    Last year (when DS was 5), my son's preschool delivered new toys to an agency who would give them to families who "weren't as lucky." In that context, my DS asked why Santa couldn't just bring more presents to those kids.

    We said that every family was different and everyone didn't have the money to buy a lot of stuff so we were helping to make it easier for their family gifts, not Santa's gifts. At least in our family, most gifts come from mom, dad, grandparents, etc (not santa) so that made sense.

    We said Santa does his best to get each child at least one thing they would really love AND that their parents think would be good for them. Some people have more room or fewer brothers and sisters so maybe they get something bigger or more stuff. The bottom line though, is that Santa gets us each something special he believes we will like.

    Stephanie




  5. #5
    janeybwild is offline Platinum level (1000+ posts)
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Posts
    1,639

    Default RE: Santa's gifts?

    What she said :)

  6. #6
    dr mom is offline Platinum level (1000+ posts)
    Join Date
    Jun 2004
    Location
    North Carolina
    Posts
    1,569

    Default RE: Santa's gifts?

    "We said Santa does his best to get each child at least one thing they would really love AND that their parents think would be good for them."

    Oh, you're GOOD! I'm going to remember that explanation!

    Sorry, kiddo, but Santa didn't bring you the giant electronic noisy thing because mean 'ol Mommy and Daddy told him not to.
    DS will find that completely plausible!
    Cindy, Mommy to DS 2/04 and DS 2/08

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Mar 2005
    Posts
    4,082

    Default RE: Santa's gifts?

    If you are one of those moms, join the club - so am I! I don't understand the difference between believing in Santa or Mickey Mouse. Sure, Mickey doesn't bring gifts, but he still isn't real. Does that mean I'm going to ruin it for my child? No. Trust me, they stop believing all too soon and the magic is gone. My stepdaughters are now 14 and 16 and we miss some of the magic from their childhood. I'll never forget the year that DH had to tell our youngest that we are really Santa. I think it was harder on us than on her. I want DD to have fun and be a kid as long as possible. She has the rest of her life to be disappointed. Why start now?

    When I was a kid, most gifts came from family, then Santa brought just a few things. I never really knew what other families did. When someone asks a kid, "What did Santa bring you?" They usually only say a couple of things. I just always thought everyone did the same thing we did. Are kids really that savvy these days to ask? Honest question - not being sarcastic at all.

    To reply to OPs question - when stepDDs were younger and asked such questions, we would ask them "What do you think?" Their answers often surprised us and were way better than anything we would have come up with. You just can't assume that you know what your kid is thinking. Sometimes, I was so sure of what was going through their little heads and I was so far off. If their answer was not so positive (as in Santa likes other kids better than me), we would have an explanation like this: You know, Santa is very busy and he does get your list, but he can't get you everything on that list. Santa checks with the parents and we help him decide which gifts to get for you. That way, if they want to be disappointed, they can be mad at us - not Santa - lol :-)

  8. #8
    BeachBum is offline Emerald level (3000+ posts)
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    .
    Posts
    3,371

    Default RE: Santa's gifts?

    I would really need to know how old the child was.

  9. #9
    lablover is offline Platinum level (1000+ posts)
    Join Date
    Jul 2003
    Posts
    1,067

    Default RE: Santa's gifts?

    I want to do Toys for Tots or something similar with DS this year and was trying come up with an explanation ahead of time as to why Santa couldn't just give them something. Your explanation is perfect!
    Mom to:
    DS - 2003
    DD - 2006

  10. #10
    tarabenet is offline Platinum level (1000+ posts)
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    USA.
    Posts
    1,633

    Default RE: Santa's gifts?

    Kim, I can deal with you on the Santa thing, but really: Mickey Mouse? Next you will be telling me Tinkerbelle hasn't any pixie dust and Fairy Godmother can't do anything withe her bibbity-bobbity! Don't go there! I am going to cry.




Page 1 of 2 1 2 LastLast

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •