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  1. #11
    amp Guest

    Default RE: How the heck do you decide about preschool???

    This is reasassuring, so thank you for your post. I don't think we really fit the criteria you considered either, so it makes me feel better about delaying the decision until I have more clarity.

  2. #12
    amp Guest

    Default RE: How the heck do you decide about preschool???

    Jacob has a bit of difficulty w/ larger groups of kids, as he's rarely had to deal with it. He is very talkative around family and some friends, but gets very tentative and uncomfortable in larger groups and unfamiliar situations. This is part of the reason I'm torturing myself w/ this. I can't bring myself to shove him into such a situation, know he would be so uncomfortable, and yet I worry that I'm fostering too much dependence. I keep asking myself if that's ok at this age, and my gut tells me it is, but I just don't know. Thanks for telling me how you decided.

    I will also search a bit more widely by looking for Mothers' Day Out programs as well as just preschool. That may help me decide for next year.

  3. #13
    bluej Guest

    Default RE: How the heck do you decide about preschool???

    Andrea, Caden had a very hard time separating from me when it came to things such as Vacation Bible School and Sunday School. When he was 3 and I took him to these things he would cry and scream and not want to be left there. I ended up being the aide to both VBS and Sunday School for those years :) I seriously wondered how we were ever going to get him to preschool and eventually school. I just could not imagine him ever getting over his refusal to do these things without me. Well we sent him to preschool when he was four and he cried the first two days (which may have been a show for me, b/c by the time I left the room and got to the window on the outside to look in, he was no longer crying). He loved preschool and never complained about it or had a fear of going after those first initial days. Now he is very outgoing in school and shy is the last word any teacher would use to describe him. He talks easily and openly (too openly a lot of times!) to not only kids, but to adults.

    Ryden isn't even close to being on the same level of timidness as Caden was, so that's why I'm not feeling the need to expose him to preschool and getting him use to being in group settings (other than church nursery). Some people feel that consistent exposure to group settings is what kids need to get over their shyness/uncomfortableness, and I think that's true in some cases, but I also think that age/maturity is a big factor as well.

  4. #14
    sugarsnappea Guest

    Default RE: How the heck do you decide about preschool???

    Hi Andrea,

    You are not weird at all! People think I am though! :)JG will be starting preschool this Fall. We are definitely in the minority. And I am still having an issue with letting her go! :)

    Our library hosts a preschool fair each year, and that is how I heard about many preschools. I also looked in the telephone book and found a few that were smaller, co-op, non-daycare types. These ones rely on word-of-mouth rather than paying for advertising to attract students. These are the types of schools I was interested in. Around here there are waitlists that start as soon as babies are born. It is crazy! JG has been on the waitlist since January 04 for the school she is attending this fall. It is smart to start looking now, even you intend to not send Jacob until 4. Good luck with your search!

  5. #15
    schums's Avatar
    schums is offline Platinum level (1000+ posts)
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    Default RE: How the heck do you decide about preschool???

    I forgot to include info in my original post about how I found preschools to investigate. Mostly, I talked to a bunch of people with slightly older kids, and found out which preschools they had looked at and enrolled in. Some recommended church ones, others suggested local independent preschools or coops. Many of the parents around here enrolled their kids in the preschool offered by the public school district. Apparently it is really good (actual teachers, some with masters degrees), curriculm based, 4 year old is mostly kindergarden readiness, and fairly inexpensive. And no waitlists from year to year (you sign your kid up when they are ready to go in -- you can't preregister when they are born or anything). You might want to look and see if your schools have something like this. Everyone we spoke with was very happy with their experience in this program, and it will probably be where Alex is enrolled when he is 4.

    Sarah

  6. #16
    hjdong Guest

    Default RE: How the heck do you decide about preschool???

    I'm not planning on sending DS to preschoool at all - and I do feel weird for it. I'm in the local MOMS group, and I was really surprised to find that most of the moms in the group are sending their child to preschool. In fact, I'm a little concerned because right now, DS has lots of other kids his age to play with on a regular basis. I imagine it will be harder to find kids for him to play with once they all start preschool.

    Keep in mind, I'm also considering homeschooling, so that makes me a little odd.

    DH works at the local community college and they have a fantastic preschool. They have an early education department so the preschool is a "lab school." It would definately be worth looking at the local colleges if that's the way you want to go.

    HTH,

  7. #17
    muskiesusan is offline Platinum level (1000+ posts)
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    Default RE: How the heck do you decide about preschool???

    Just so you know, I had no idea that there was preschool for kids younger than 4. Where I grew up, it was for 4 yo and it was optional. Well, around here, everyone starts there kids at 3 by the latest, and I was shocked. I am lucky as Nick's b-day is one day passed the deadline for enrollment, so I avoided a lot of the stress. There is no way he would have been ready for preschool at 3. I wouldn't have sent him. Now that he is 3.5, he keeps asking to go to school, and I know by the time he starts at 4, he will be more than ready, but if I am wrong, I will pull him out. You have to do what you think is best, YKWIM?

    I also had no idea how to search for schools, so I started asking moms in the neighborhood. I got a pretty good idea from this which ones where too daycare like, too religious, too rigid, as well as the good ones to look at. Our public school has a program, which I have heard good things about and some of the churches do have co-ops, but with another child at home, that wasn't possible. Most preschools have open houses or allow drop ins, which was helpful when we narrowed down our choices.

    We are sending Nick to a Montessori program, as I think that will fit his personality best. He tends to be a loner, so it will provide him with independence, but also an opportunity to interact with others. We were really on the fence about doing this type of a program, but Nick loved it when we went for a visit, more so than the other traditional preschools.

    Just do what you think is best, you're not weird! I would think a Mom's Day Out program would be good for your situation, but around here anyway, they have huge waiting lists.


    Susan
    Mom to Nick 10/01
    & Alex 04/04

  8. #18
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    Default RE: How the heck do you decide about preschool???

    You're not weird! :) I hadn't considered preschool at all, thinking that we'd wait until DS was 4. Then, other moms in my playgroup were signing their kids up for it. I still didn't think we'd do it, but I did think I'd investigate. What I learned is that you have to sign up early. For fall 2005, applications were due between January and March around here. I was really surprised about that. So, keep that in mind.

    I talked to other moms I knew about preschools (and even asked on-line here and got help from another mom who referred me to a couple of preschools). Then, I visited with DS.

    I was still torn (and still am, actually), but we wound up signing DS up for a Mother's Morning Out program where DS will go 1 morning a week.

    My only rationale for deciding to send DS to this program was to improve his socialization skills. I really am not worried about his scholastic capabilities at this point. I can work with him on those areas. However, he is very clingy with me when we are around groups of other kids. And, we have had a really difficult time going to church services because DS won't stay in the nursery. The reason I am still a bit torn is that I worry that having him go will be traumatic. However, at the same time, we would like to be able to attend an entire church service or other event that offers child care. We are hoping that this program will provide that.

    Plus, during the tour, he really seemed excited about the room that would be his, the teachers were really nice, they do lots of crafts (which he loves), have a separate music teacher (and I really want to expose him to music) and are well thought of in the community.

    DS will be 3. I have taken the attitude that we will try it and if it's not working, we'll pull him out of the program. If it does work, he'll get some socialization time and I'll have a few hours to myself to get things done. It can be a win-win.

    But, I wouldn't feel as though you have to do it. I had decided that I didn't want a 2-day or 3-day program at this point. If I hadn't found the 1-day program, DS wouldn't be in preschool and we'd just be doing parks and rec programs or other classes. I still plan to do some parks and rec and other classes with DS too.

    Good luck in your decision.
    Mommy to Justin (13 years) & Ashlyn (8 years)

  9. #19
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    Default RE: How the heck do you decide about preschool???

    Well, we started Ryan in Montessori preschool (they call it pre primary for his age group) in January since little Miss Riley was on the way. I was on bedrest, so I also needed the break from Ryan. I wasn't quite sure how "schoolish" it was since it is not really recommended that actual hard core teaching happen this young. It's not! They do Montessori lessons like showing the kids (no words to explain it, just learn by watching the teacher do it) a bucket with water in it then using a sponge move the water to another bucket by squeezing it. When they do snack time, they take their own plates and rinse them off and put them in a dish drainer (for them to be washed by the teacher after school is over). He does a craft project a week too.

    It's a very calm environment compared to some of the other "schools," that were really glorified daycares, that I visited. The ratios are great too so I know Ryan is in good hands. As far as Ryans take on it....he loves it! He talks about school all of the time. He behaves better there than at home too, btw.

    So there you go Andrea. If it is something you are even considering for Jake, I would really do it before the bambino gets here too so he is established in the routine!
    Mom to R and R

  10. #20
    momtoemma Guest

    Default RE: How the heck do you decide about preschool???

    I haven't read all the other posts yet, but I wanted to reply and tell you why I'm sending my DD to preshool starting this fall. I didn't really consider preschool until DD will be 3, but I know lots of moms that use programs designed for kids younger than 3. Around here, most of these type of programs are referred to as Mother's Day out, but I think they do lots of activities similar to preschool. I work full time but am lucky enough to have my mom care for my children. Because of this, my kids aren't around other kids there are very often. So, the main reason I want DD to start preschool is far more for the social aspect rather than the educational one. I don't think you're weird for not wanting to put him in a program yet. If you don't feel like you need a break and you think he wouldn't handle it very well, I probably wouldn't consider it just yet either...maybe a year from now when he is 3. Good luck with your decision!

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