PTand Pooping

[HIU8]

DS is PT. During the day he is fine. At night he wears a nighttime pull up (sometimes it's wet and sometimes dry). However, he flat out refuses to poop in the potty. He will either wait for his pullup at night or just go right in front of us in his underwear then complain that he doesn't want the poopy and we need to change his underwear. Anyone BTDT? Any suggestions of how to handle this (or whether to do anything at all)?

Thanks

[Twoboos]

Ohhhh I have so much btdt. There is nothing more frustrating. I won't tell you how long it went on here, it will make you cry.

Here is a post I did on this a while ago, maybe there are some good tips. DD's problem was combined with constipation, so it was more than just the going in the pants. It was a cycle of withholding/getting constipated/going in pants or dipe only.

If you search on me, I have plenty of poop posts. Never thought my life would come to this!!

GOOD LUCK! Hang in there, it seems like it will last forever but DD has really turned a corner now. (I suppose I should not have typed that...)

-=-=-=-=-=-=-
First of all, let me say poop issues are the WORST!!! I think I had responded to your previous post and said my DD (also 4) was going well now on the potty. HA! Spoke too soon there, major regression last week. It is so frustrating, I am sure I am going to lose my mind when we have an episode.

Here's a random list of ideas... some I have done, some I have heard of, some I am making up now.

- Progressive prizes for pooping IN the bathroom; without legs crossed; sitting down; sitting near potty; sitting ON potty w/dipe; sitting on potty w/dipe w/hole in it to let poop out; for going on potty

- Sitting on potty to "practice" around times she would normally go, maybe something will fall out

- Hang prizes or pics of prizes in bathroom for viewing/incentive

- What will motivate - stickers/dollar store prizes/clothing (dd wanted princess nightgowns SO badly, those got a couple out...)/ movies/etc.

- Have a person of "authority" talk to her about it (dr/teacher/other type person)

- Take away all panties as panties are for girls who pee/poop on the potty. Use new panties as a bribe to go on potty

- Tell DD that she is making a decision where to poop, big girls poop on the potty and by going in dipe she is not a big girl. What "big girl" incentive is there for her?

- Keep her stool as soft as possible so it can slide out and she doesn't have to struggle (although this is probably more consitipation advice...)

- Tell her that you only have X dipes left, and when they're gone they're gone, time to go on potty. Y'know, because the dipes say on them "not for girls over the age of 4" so you can't buy more.

- Hold her and talk softly when she's on there screaming and crying. (I don't mean hold her ON there, but hold to comfort.) I tell DD to squeeze me as tightly as she can when it hurts.

- Be prepared with panties you can easily toss if there is a big accident in them. I did not have the stamina to do poop loads every night, so I invested in like 30 pairs of cheapo undies (hanes/fruit of loom multipacks), and tossed as needed. Yes it was horribly wasteful but I was at the end of my rope and saved my sanity.

If I think of more I will add to this rambling list but good luck in the meantime.

[almostsane]

Not a BTDT, I am actually living it! DS has not had a wet accident alone in over 2 months, yet he hates pooping in the potty. He went 6 days without going and I think it was all so that he wouldn't have to go in the potty. He has gone before, actually was doing great for about 3 months, but something has caused him to stop. We have no idea what it is/was, but the ped. says just ride it out. He will eventually learn. Our ped says not to punish them in anyway for not going, just highly encourage them to go. HTH

[Joolsplus2]

Try to be matter of fact about it and let him help clean up the mess. My ds and I got into a battle royale about this issue, and he just ended up always going at night in his pullup to avoid the issue. I finally did some reading about treatment for encopresis (he was four, normally they'd be talking about even older kids with truly unpleasant issues ), but I got the tip to use a suppository. It only had to be inserted 2 evenings in a row (with commands to 'hold it!' for 15 minutes, then putting him on the toilet), and he was never, ever afraid to poop on the potty again. It was like a miracle cure. But I would have rather not had to go through the 1.5 years of fighting about it before that . If your ds is still going in his pants during the day time, you still have your toe in the door... he can help you dump it in the toilet, put his pants in the wash, have a little conversation about how it feels bad to be dirty but so nice to feel clean on the toilet...etc etc...
My fingers are crossed for you!

[Mamma2004]

I got the tip to use a suppository. It only had to be inserted 2 evenings in a row (with commands to 'hold it!' for 15 minutes, then putting him on the toilet), and he was never, ever afraid to poop on the potty again. It was like a miracle cure. But I would have rather not had to go through the 1.5 years of fighting about it before that .

My DS, too, holds his poop until he goes to bed with a Pull Up or a diaper. It's horrible! I know it is not good for his little system and I want to get him over this fear he seems to have developed.

Are you saying that we could give him a suppository, tell him to "hold it" [meaning the suppository, or the poop? Sorry, I want to be sure I understand!] for 15 minutes and voila`? Hmmm. I'll try anything.

[npace19147]

Yup, exact same problem going on here. DD "sucks it back in" as she describes it during the day, and waits for a pullup. It is so frustrating! I have had some people recommend fiber chews to me recently, so I'm going to try them.

DH had some success this past weekend bribing her with chocolate treats. I'm not thrilled with this method, but the whole thing is so unpleasant I figured what the heck, at least DH is dealing with it!

I also refuse to clean poopy underwear, it gets pitched immediately. Then she has to wear a diaper b/c big girls who poop in the potty wear underwear, babies who poop in their pants wear diapers. Not a punishment, but very matter of fact. This is more for my sanity than anything else, I can only deal with so many accidents in a week.

Good luck, this PT'ing thing is so not fun!

[HIU8]

DS tells me he has to go poop and then does it in his underwear in front of me. Afterwards he begs me to get it off of him. We both go put it in the toilet together and he tells me that he doesn't like the feeling of it on him. So, hopefully we are close. I bought him a toy I know he really wants and have it up on a high shelf so he can see it. He knows it's his when he poops in the potty and not until then. He tells me everyday that when he poops in the potty the toy will be his. Hopefully that is enough incentive for him to poop in the potty sooner than later.

[Joolsplus2]

My DS, too, holds his poop until he goes to bed with a Pull Up or a diaper. It's horrible! I know it is not good for his little system and I want to get him over this fear he seems to have developed.

Are you saying that we could give him a suppository, tell him to "hold it" [meaning the suppository, or the poop? Sorry, I want to be sure I understand!] for 15 minutes and voila`? Hmmm. I'll try anything.

Yeah, the suppository gives an instant and very strong urge, but they have to hold it in till it dissolves and draws enough water into the colon so that you actually poop poop when you poop, and not just the solid undissolved suppository.

[Mamma2004]

Yeah, the suppository gives an instant and very strong urge, but they have to hold it in till it dissolves and draws enough water into the colon so that you actually poop poop when you poop, and not just the solid undissolved suppository.

Thank you for clarifying - I guess we'll give it a try!

[hbridge]

Before trying a suppository I would check with your pediatrician and make sure that's a road that you want to go down. I know adults who talk about suppositories their parents gave them as children...and it's not in a good way!

We had an encopresis diagnosis and saw a specialist who recommended Toilet School. It was a wonderful experience for all of us and DC is now trained. The 2 years of toilet training are now a "distant" memory.

Also, please remember that just because you are ready your child may not be. It doesn't matter how big they are, how old they are, or how mature they are; their bodies may not be ready. Now one knows how difficult that is more than we do, but their bodies have to be ready for potty training to happen.

You WILL get their, it may take a while, but if my DC was trained, yours will too.

Best of luck!