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  1. #1
    s_gosney is offline Platinum level (1000+ posts)
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    Default The 30 minute nap

    DS was a great napper at first, not unusual for him to go 2 hours. But it's all just fallen apart over the last few weeks and we're settling into the dreaded 30 minute nap cycle. I did this with dd and was so happy when I thought I'd gotten a good sleeper this go-round.

    So, does anyone have any tips that actually helped their babe stretch the naps? (I know it's often just something you have to deal with, but I thought I'd try ) So far I've tried swaddling (in the PNP, in the bouncy seat, in the infant carrier) and unswaddled in all those places, and putting him down on his belly (which dh flipped out about yesterday *sigh*).

    Otherwise, can we talk about ways to survive/cope? I'm working 20 hours a week right now and I'm supposed to be drafting a paper, but it's so hard to get anything done when you spend all day putting a baby to sleep. And when school starts in the fall, I think I may really fail out of my program if I can't get him to take longer naps. By then he'll have hit 3 months, so hopefully it will stabilize on it's own, but if not I need to have a good arsenal of tricks. So far I sometimes nurse him on the boppy while at the keyboard and just leave him lying there. With dd, just being near me would help her nap longer, but it doesn't seem to work that way for him. I have a hot sling which he will sleep in, but it can be hard to work around the bump (in sling or on boppy) and I really don't want him to always have to sleep in the sling. Plus, he's around 12 pounds now and my back/shoulder already hurt when I wear him most of the day. I've been planning to switch to an ergo when the hot sling gets too uncomfortable. Can you sit at a desk and type with the ergo? Is there a better option I should consider instead?

    And finally, does anyone have any stories of babies that started out with the 30 minute nap thing and went on to become good sleepers? DD has been a horrible sleeper her whole life and I really really need to believe there's a light at the end of this tunnel. I worry that with dd I may have made some of her sleeping issues worse by providing the extra support (sling, sleeping on the boppy, etc) and didn't let her learn how to settle herself. We still won't do CIO, but I wonder if there isn't a middle ground in there somewhere. And when (ie, what age) does the "do whatever it takes to get them some sleep" shift over to more of a focus on helping them learn to sleep? KWIM?

    I've talked with our ped several times about reflux, but she feels confident that he doesn't need meds. I am not so sure.

    Thanks for any tips or even just sympathy and commisseration.
    Sherri
    dd 10/03 "Mommy I made a video for you. If you want to see it, you should go to kids dot org slash Kylee."
    ds 05/08 who is quite amused by playing peekaboo with the straw on his foogo cup

  2. #2
    SnuggleBuggles is online now Black Diamond level (25,000+ posts)
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    Ds2 was a cat napper. My ILs always remarked on how little sleeping he did. But, around 5-6 months (all a blur even though it just happened!) he started taking at least one daily nap in his crib that is at least one hour long but usually longer. It just happened without me trying to really do anything about it. Before that I had him napping in the bassinet in the family room, in his bouncy seat, in my arms after nursing or on the go.

    I think it is just par for the course for a 2 month old. Hang in there! Way too young for CIO (hold off for the 6 month mark if you decide to do it). One thought I had was to work in the car if he will fall asleep in there. I know that would be tough for dd but maybe you could do a walk or a drive to get ds to fall asleep then work on the go at a coffee shop, on a park bench or even in the car?

    My dh hated that I let ds2 sleep on his belly at night so we didn't. But, for nap time we always did because we were awake and hanging out right there with him. If that works go for it. What dh doesn't know...


    It will get better! I worried that I would just have a cat napper back a few months ago but things have shaken out nicely. knock on wood.

    Beth

  3. #3
    pastrygirl is offline Diamond level (5000+ posts)
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    And finally, does anyone have any stories of babies that started out with the 30 minute nap thing and went on to become good sleepers?
    Yes! My son took 30-minute naps until he was 9 months old. He then started taking 60- or 90-minute naps at that point. Then when I moved him to a twin bed at 23 months, he started taking 3- or 4-hour naps!!! Jackpot. I love it.

    I never found a solution to extending his catnaps. I tried everything (except CIO) and just ended up incredibly frustrated. I think he just needed to grow.

    He's always been a great sleeper at night. He slept 5-hour stretches early on (we co-slept the first few months). He slept 11 straight hours at 11 months old and ever since, with the very occasional night waking. I've decided I'd much rather pay upfront if it means having a good sleeper... though I think I'm lucky that he turned into one!

  4. #4
    BillK's Avatar
    BillK is offline Emerald level (3000+ posts)
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    I can't offer much help on the 30 minute deal - but I know with our new lil guy my wife loves her Yamo carrier and can do most anything with him - either on the front or back. http://www.karritreelane.com/store/i...d&productId=12
    ~Bill

  5. #5
    ray7694 is offline Sapphire level (2000+ posts)
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    I think 30 minutes indicates overtired. How long is his activity before you put him down. At 3 months it should be 1 1/2 of awake time. My dd would yawn right at 1 1/2 hours. I would start to wind her down a little before that and swaddle for the crib. She had to learn to sleep on her own so I would let her fuss (not scream) which didn't last long before falling asleep.

    I highly recommend The Baby Whisperer Solves your Sleep Problems and the website www.thebabywhisperer.com message boards for help on everything.

  6. #6
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    My DS1 was a 30-minute napper too. I've come across several other Moms in the last few years who experienced it with their child as well. I am actually surprised that none of the sleep experts have acknowledged that some kids are just like that. Is your child happy during the day? Growing and learning to do things at a normal rate? If so, I'd stop fighting it - if you can find a way for you to get some relax time each day, I think you'll both be much happier!

    My son didn't start longer naps until he was 18 months old. One thing that I thought made a difference was a very dark room. I actually put his PNP in our walk-in closet for naps, and it seemed to help. I ended up buying shades for the windows in his room.

    -Kim

  7. #7
    pastrygirl is offline Diamond level (5000+ posts)
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    Quote Originally Posted by kimberley-k
    I am actually surprised that none of the sleep experts have acknowledged that some kids are just like that.
    Me too! I thought my kid was abnormal until I started asking about this, and found out it's not uncommon at all! Based on the forums I visit online, it seems to be about 50/50. Not everyone has sleepy babies!

    Quote Originally Posted by kimberley-k
    Is your child happy during the day? Growing and learning to do things at a normal rate? If so, I'd stop fighting it - if you can find a way for you to get some relax time each day, I think you'll both be much happier!
    My son was a little cranky but he had reflux. He showed no signs of not getting enough sleep or being overtired, though. He took 5 naps a day, after only an hour or 90 minutes of awake time (which he spent nursing, nonstop). Once I finally gave in and stopped trying to get him to nap longer, things got much easier! It would've been really hard if I was working, though. I don't know how I would've worked around his schedule -- I think I would've had to limit it to nighttime or weekends when my husband was home. I'd been hoping to work 20 hours a week from home but it was clear that Toby wasn't going to let me do that, so I quit.

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by SnuggleBuggles
    Ds2 was a cat napper. My ILs always remarked on how little sleeping he did. But, around 5-6 months (all a blur even though it just happened!) he started taking at least one daily nap in his crib that is at least one hour long but usually longer. It just happened without me trying to really do anything about it. Before that I had him napping in the bassinet in the family room, in his bouncy seat, in my arms after nursing or on the go.
    This has been my experience with dd as well. She started out napping 2-3 hours at a time and then that disintigrated around 2 months and we were lucky to get 30 minutes at a stretch and she would be awake for much longer stretches than 1.5 hours!! Just when I thought I would go nuts, she started taking longer naps. Now, at 5.5 months, one of them is always around 2 hours and the other is a bit shorter.
    Daniele
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    dd1 watching over her brothers and sister from Heaven
    ds1 13 years old
    dd2 10 years old
    ds2 6 years old
    Placenta Increta/c-hyst survivor

  9. #9
    s_gosney is offline Platinum level (1000+ posts)
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    Default Thanks!

    Thanks everyone! Sorry I'm a little slow on the response. I'm trying to be better about actually working while I'm at work. LOL.

    As for the issue of being overtired, I think that sometimes that is the case, but not always. I have tried to be very diligent in watching for his sleepy cues, but I should maybe try to act a little more pre-emptively. Who knows.

    And yes, I agree with many of you that this seems to be much more typical than is acknowledged. I always joke about all the people who come up to you in stores and say "oh I just *loved* it when mine were that small." Now sure babies are cute and cuddly, but I still want to and remind them of the sleep deprivation, the baby who screams when put down, etc. Disclaimer: I really do love my dcs.

    I guess for now I'll keep playing around with different places and positions for sleeping and hope the catnaps stop sooner rather than later. He slept for 6 hours straight last night, so I guess I really can't complain. But I know he can settle himself a little, so I just have to figure out the trick.

    Thanks Bill for the carrier rec. I'll def check into that one.

    And yes, Beth. Definitely what dh doesn't know won't hurt him...

    Thanks again everyone!
    Sherri
    dd 10/03 "Mommy I made a video for you. If you want to see it, you should go to kids dot org slash Kylee."
    ds 05/08 who is quite amused by playing peekaboo with the straw on his foogo cup

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