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  1. #1
    maylips's Avatar
    maylips is offline Platinum level (1000+ posts)
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    Default Dear "experts": no, my libido is NOT back....

    I'm in my second trimester and HATE reading all of these posts about how my libido should be back and flying high by now. It puts such pressure on me! No, I DON'T feel like having sex. I feel fat, tired, constipated....and I'm actually having a fairly easy pregnancy. But these "experts" make me feel like a failure to my DH, like I should be running around in sexy lingerie, all heated up for him, when all I really feel like doing at the end of the day is going to bed at 8:30.

    For those of you who did feel that way, I hope you realize how lucky you are.
    Mom to my little girl 3/12/07
    ....and boy 8/04/09

  2. #2
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    Hugs. If it helps, I am 21 weeks and just now getting my libido back.
    Although it does not matter. I am on pelvic rest.
    I think when you have a little one to take care of, you are just tired!
    Mama to ds1 (9), ds2 (6), dd (4), and ds3 (1)

  3. #3
    Momof3Labs is offline Pink Diamond level (15,000+ posts)
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    You can have mine. It's back, but with all of the pelvic issues I'm having already (I have a history of pelvic separation), it's not like we can make the most of it. Truly, if I could bottle it up and send it to you, I would.
    Single mom to

    DS ("twice exceptional") - September 2002
    DS - February 2006
    DD - July 2009
    DD - July 2009

  4. #4
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    I am one of the "experts" who sees it be 50/50 in my practice - either increased or decreased throughout pregnancy. Unfortunately, many DH's have only seen the experts who say that the 2nd trimester leads to lots of fun for them. Go get some rest and assure your husband that if your libido were never going to reappear there would be a lot more only children out there. Try to make nice on the rare night that you aren't semi-comatose by 8pm even if you'd rather catch up on your reading.

    Lori - sorry you are already having problems... I was wondering when you said twins how this would be - I hope you are not in too much pain.
    Alaina
    DS1 12 , DS2 7.5 and DS3 5

  5. #5
    kdeunc is offline Sapphire level (2000+ posts)
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    I feel your pain. Not only was my second trimester rather uneventful but I am 6 months post partum, breastfeeding and I swear I couldn't find my libido with a map!
    Kelly

    DS 1 12-02
    DS 2 12-04
    DD 07-08

  6. #6
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    Haha well mine came back for about two weeks and then poof, gone again! Now my body just hurts and I feel large and unattractive. At least it came for a little while right?

    Maybe yours will pop up one week soon!
    DD1 06
    DD2 09
    DS1 13

    Certified Child Passenger Safety Technician

  7. #7
    Coral is offline Copper level (50+ posts)
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    Oh honey, I'm right there with you. I'm 25 weeks and the LAST think I want to even think about is sex. Are you kidding me? For my husband's sake I do hope that it comes back soon, but right now, all I want is a warm bath and a good book. Oh, and for the dogs to sleep through the night so I can too!

  8. #8
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    not only is mine NOT "back" from pregancy (my youngest child is 4) but i never had one in the first place and have never enjoyed the "activity" even when it does happen. might as well use a q-tip in my ear. feels the same.
    Liza has been hangin' around this board for six years.

    My sons are 4 and 6. And they are very loud.

  9. #9
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    I was one of the "lucky" ones. Unfortunately, that's the only time my libido rears it's head. Too bad I don't plan on being pregnant again. Sigh.
    DD1 - 1996
    DD2 - 1999
    DD3 - 2005

    Surfaces are for working, not for storing. - Peter Walsh

  10. #10
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    All I did was sleep my second trimester. I would drag to work, nap at lunch, drag home, sleep, eat when DH made me dinner and then be asleep by 8pm. I was not exactly a party animal.
    Karin & Katie Oct. 2002

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