Originally Posted by
salsah
thank you for posting. i'm glad that you are seeking help. my dd1 sounds like your ds1. i have been afraid to post asking for help because i don't think that people who haven't dealt with this kind of personality in a child can appreciate how difficult it is. i've been afraid of being flamed for saying that on most days, i just don't feel like i love my dd1. being around her is draining, she brings me down, and brings out the worst in me. so although i don't have any advice, i understand what you are going through.
I only now understand what it is like to have a true high needs child, after having DD2. I had *no idea*....I really didn't, every single move of the day can be a challenge. Yesterday Dd is on top of me (as I was trying to lay by Dh-Inever get 2 di that either) and she is SCREAMING "I'm hungry & want waffles now!". Every attempt to hild her off or re-direct=failed. That is every single minute of the day-similaR issues. DD1 was NOT that way, so I'm just getting my new collection of parenting tools together now. It's hard, I love her SO much but she can wear on the nerves easily and I can feel disconnected b/c she is so intense.
I may not be much help (sorry) but u are not alone and there are strength in numbers! It will get better. FWIW, my DD2 is all about Daddy now too and my DH is **not** a disciplinarian, I am...this seems to draw them into that parent, it's a toughie for me b/c I really need him on the same page as me with this one.
Keep plugging at those baby steps - as your littler one grows and needs less of your time, the older sibling will lose some of the underlying jealosy too-which will make things better.
{{hugs}}
Bodyboarding, music loving, clothing upcycler Mom to adult kid1, elementary kid2