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Thread: Baby Dedication

  1. #1
    lhafer is offline Diamond level (5000+ posts)
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    Default Baby Dedication

    I have a question. I have an aquaintance who had a baby, and is having him dedicated at their church in a couple of weeks. This couple is good friends with our best friends. I know the wife more - we have all gone out to lunch, I attended some bible study classes at her house on several occasions. I gave her some baby stuff I no longer needed. DH and I were invited and went to their baby shower. But this is all because our best friends have also been there. They are super nice, and I really like the wife (just don't know the husband as well).

    We got an invitation to their new baby's Dedication. DH and I are NOT religious in any way (DH moreso than me). He doesn't know them at all really - has only met them a couple of times. The invitation is super nice - a photo of the baby, the invite, and no gifts wanted.

    So who gets invited to these? A lot of people? I've never been to one before, and it was kind of suprising to me to get an invite in the mail, given our level of relationship. I would be more than happy to go and support them and their new baby. Just wondering, since I feel like we don't know them that well.

    But perhaps this could be an opening to get to know them better?

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    lhafer is offline Diamond level (5000+ posts)
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    I guess I'm wondering if it would be weird if we went, based on our nonbeliefs? We don't believe in organized religion. But I would love to support them. So would it be weird NOT to go??

    I'm confused as to what to do. And since they've asked for no gifts, it's not like I can send a gift instead.

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    If you want to go, you should go. I am an atheist (culturally Jewish) but I go to lots of events for people in both churches and synagogues. It isn't necessarily about believing in the same religion, it is about being there for your friend. I don't know what a dedication is, but is it like a baptism? One of the primary purposes of a baptism is to welcome the baby into a community, and you are a member of his/her community, so I think it is a-okay.
    Mommy to my little bear cubs DD1 and DD2- 4/2010 and 4/2012

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    AnnieW625 is online now Black Diamond level (25,000+ posts)
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    We invited only family, and a few very close friends of the same religion to both of our DDs baptisms. I think that because you have been to bible study classes with her that is a nice connection, plus she considers you a friend. I would feel very honored to attend. I think that you and your DH should go. If you are the only non family members then while it might be awkward I still think that you should go. My friends had no problem interacting with our families.

    If it matters any I would follow the no gift rule too.
    Annie
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    baby 2, 4-2009 (our Tri-18 baby)

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    lhafer is offline Diamond level (5000+ posts)
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    Quote Originally Posted by BabyBearsMom View Post
    If you want to go, you should go. I am an atheist (culturally Jewish) but I go to lots of events for people in both churches and synagogues. It isn't necessarily about believing in the same religion, it is about being there for your friend. I don't know what a dedication is, but is it like a baptism? One of the primary purposes of a baptism is to welcome the baby into a community, and you are a member of his/her community, so I think it is a-okay.
    I had to look up what a dedication was!! Here's what I found:
    "A Baby Dedication is a ceremony in which believing parents, and sometimes entire families, make a commitment before the Lord to submit a child to God's will and to raise that child according to God's Word and God's ways."

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    jenstring95 is offline Platinum level (1000+ posts)
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    Quote Originally Posted by lhafer View Post
    I guess I'm wondering if it would be weird if we went, based on our nonbeliefs? We don't believe in organized religion. But I would love to support them. So would it be weird NOT to go??

    I'm confused as to what to do. And since they've asked for no gifts, it's not like I can send a gift instead.
    I don't think it would be any different to go to a dedication as a non-believer than to go to a wedding in a church as a non-believer (or to a wedding where the couple is a different religion than your own). You are just going to support them and celebrate their child. I don't think there is anything wrong with that no matter what your beliefs! Also, it is possible that they invited you as the next step toward a closer friendship. It is always nice when the people we are close to are also close to each other.

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    MamaSnoo is offline Sapphire level (2000+ posts)
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    I have gone to a variety of things like this outside my religion, and it has never been weird. It helps if you can find out beforehand what is going to happen at the ceremony, if you are not familiar with it.

    If she invited you, I think it means that she would like you to come, and you should go if you are able/if you want to encourage the friendship.

    I always enjoying seeing ppls various customs for important family milestones like babies, weddings, coming of age, even if I do not participate directly in their faith or culture.
    Bug-a-wug 3/2008

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    Quote Originally Posted by lhafer View Post
    "A Baby Dedication is a ceremony in which believing parents, and sometimes entire families, make a commitment before the Lord to submit a child to God's will and to raise that child according to God's Word and God's ways."
    We have had all 3 children dedicated in the church. According to Christian beliefs, we don't baptize until the person can make the conscious choice themselves to follow God.

    I would go just to support your friend and celebrate the baby. It's usually just a small handful of family members there at the church service. The pastor usually gives the parents a small token children's Bible with the baby's name inscribed in it. I personally would not expect a gift, a friends company would be enough.

    Usually the parents and baby + siblings come to the front of the church, everyone else stays in their seats. The parents say a nice promise before God and the church to raise the baby right and follow the Lord, and a prayer of blessing is said. Then they all sit back down.
    Last edited by daisymommy; 06-09-2011 at 05:36 PM.
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  9. #9
    Toba is offline Platinum level (1000+ posts)
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    Quote Originally Posted by AnnieW625 View Post
    We invited only family, and a few very close friends of the same religion to both of our DDs baptisms. I think that because you have been to bible study classes with her that is a nice connection, plus she considers you a friend. I would feel very honored to attend. I think that you and your DH should go. If you are the only non family members then while it might be awkward I still think that you should go. My friends had no problem interacting with our families.

    If it matters any I would follow the no gift rule too.
    I totally agree with Annie. Our DS's dedication was when he was almost 3 months. All our family and close friends were there, as well as our pastor and his wife (we're pretty close to our pastor outside of church anyway). We had about 40 people there and could have cared less if anyone brought gifts ... I just wanted to share the special day with special people in DS's life. We took photos of DS with each couple and they are very special memories.

    PS: Obviously, there was a lot of religious stuff going on during the dedication at church but at the "reception" afterwards in a nice restaurant, the only thing religious was when our pastor prayed before we ate. That was it ... the rest was just a fun party.
    Last edited by Toba; 06-09-2011 at 07:53 PM.

  10. #10
    lhafer is offline Diamond level (5000+ posts)
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    Cool...thanks for making me feel good about it.

    She's aware of our religious philosophies (or lack there of) and was when I attended her bible studies in her home. Something happened in my life during that time and I needed another perspective (no one around me IRL knows what was going on), and those classes gave it to me. I got a lot out of it - and as it turned out the 1st night's subject touched on exactly what I was dealing with at the time!

    I do feel very honored to be invited, and I plan on going. I just wanted to get everyone's feel on here.

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