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  1. #1
    ♥ms.pacman♥ is offline Red Diamond level (10,000+ posts)
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    Default how to help my DD with receptive language?

    At 10 mos (9mo adjusted age) my DD had an EI evaluation and it was determined that her most significant area of delay was in receptive language (she had the level of a 5 month old). However, apparently that was not delayed enough for services, and she started babbling and catching up with other things so we left it at that.

    DD is now almost 14 mos (13 mos adjusted), and i've noticed that while she now says a few words (mama, dada, diaper, ball, poo-poo, cracker) she's still not doing very well in receptive language. She does not follow any commands at all; she NEVER points to thinks when asked (she will point to things all the time, but if you ask her "Where's Elmo?" she will not point to it, even if it's right there in front of her). If i ask her simple things like can you give me the toy, she doesn't seem to understand at all. She does babble a lot, and if she sees a ball she will point and say "Ball! ball! ball!" but if you ask her "Where's the ball?" she will usually ignore me and do nothing. It's like she doesn't hear or understand me.

    I am also just shocked by the disparity with DS. At 11mos, I would ask him, "Where's the turtle? Can you find the turtle" (it would be on a shelf on the other side of the room), and he would walk around the room looking for it, then find it, and point. THen if we asked him to bring it to us, he would. I did this for five different objects he was familiar with and he did the same thing. This was waaayy before he could talk; he could not even say the names of the objects he was getting.

    anyway, just wondering if anybody has any suggestions/comments...

  2. #2
    twowhat? is offline Red Diamond level (10,000+ posts)
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    We had one that NEVER followed commands and one that ALWAYS did at that age. I ended up deciding that DD1 simply didn't want to "show off". But - it was clear she had receptive language abilities because she'd do things like your DD (point to a ball and say "BAH" - but only when she wanted to!) which told me that clearly she picked up on the name of the object by listening to me.

    So if she's doing things like that, I would think her receptive language is fine and she'd just a chill baby who doesn't care to demonstrate.

    But like everyone always says, it doesn't hurt to pursue another evaluation!

  3. #3
    ♥ms.pacman♥ is offline Red Diamond level (10,000+ posts)
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    Quote Originally Posted by twowhat? View Post
    So if she's doing things like that, I would think her receptive language is fine and she'd just a chill baby who doesn't care to demonstrate.
    interesting....now that you mention it, i should add that it doesn't help that EVERY TIME I ask DD, "Where's the monkey?", DS is always RIGHT THERE and is literally jumping at the chance to point to it and say "It's right here!!" Or, if i point to a cow in a book and say what is that [DD]?", DS will run over, announce, "That's a a cow." and then run off. Bleh. I can never get DD to do anything bc anytime i ask her DS is MORE than happy to show off that he can do something.

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    twowhat? is offline Red Diamond level (10,000+ posts)
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    Quote Originally Posted by ♥ms.pacman♥ View Post
    interesting....now that you mention it, i should add that it doesn't help that EVERY TIME I ask DD, "Where's the monkey?", DS is always RIGHT THERE and is literally jumping at the chance to point to it and say "It's right here!!" Or, if i point to a cow in a book and say what is that [DD]?", DS will run over, announce, "That's a a cow." and then run off. Bleh. I can never get DD to do anything bc anytime i ask her DS is MORE than happy to show off that he can do something.
    LOL! Our house was similar. We always joked that DD1 (who started talking and putting sentences together MUCH later than DD2) simply never needed to talk because DD2 did all the talking for her - even the staff at our ped's office have commented on it ("So - I take it she's the one that talks for both of them?"). And DD1 is also FAR more laid back than DD2.

  5. #5
    niccig is offline Clean Sweep forum moderator
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    Quote Originally Posted by ♥ms.pacman♥ View Post
    interesting....now that you mention it, i should add that it doesn't help that EVERY TIME I ask DD, "Where's the monkey?", DS is always RIGHT THERE and is literally jumping at the chance to point to it and say "It's right here!!" Or, if i point to a cow in a book and say what is that [DD]?", DS will run over, announce, "That's a a cow." and then run off. Bleh. I can never get DD to do anything bc anytime i ask her DS is MORE than happy to show off that he can do something.
    Can you do games like this with DD when DH has DS? Or talk to DS about how he gets to have a turn at finding the monkey and then he has to wait for DD to have her turn.

    I would be doing a running dialogue like "here's elmo, look at elmo's nose, can you touch elmo's nose" Make a funny noise as you touch elmo's nose, then ask her to touch elmo's nose. My DS wouldn't perform either, but maybe 1:1 your DD might start to follow directions more.

  6. #6
    brittone2 is offline Blue Diamond level (20,000+ posts)
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    If it continues you may want to request a re-eval. When I worked on eval teams we would often tell parents to call in X months if their DC wasn't doing Y and Z at that point.

    The difficulty IMO with recommending ways to work with her is that it depends on the origin of the issue, obviously. So we can give you ideas, but they may or may not be appropriate for her. That's where a professional can really be helpful, because they should be able to get a better idea of why her receptive language is a little behind.

    Does she have a history of ear infections? Has she ever had her hearing checked? I'd probably call EI again and express your concerns-"it is like she doesn't hear me." and go from there. You may want to have private testing done, or private therapy if she doesn't end up qualifying.

    I'd probably want her hearing checked, have her checked for fluid, etc. as a starting point since you are saying it is as if she doesn't hear you.

    If she doesn't point, does she look toward whatever you tell her? Like if you say "where is daddy?" would she turn her head toward him even if she doesn't point? It doesn't sound like she's doing that but just confirming.
    Mama to DS-2004
    DD-2006
    and a new addition-ds born march 2010

  7. #7
    ♥ms.pacman♥ is offline Red Diamond level (10,000+ posts)
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    thanks for the responses! making a squeak when i ask her to touch elmo's nose may help, i will try that!

    and DD has never had an ear infection. i know she can hear bc she sometimes is afraid of loud sounds, and she recognizes my voice when i come in a room. sometimes she's with DH in one room, and then i get back from somewhere and start talking to DS in another room, and DD starts bawling bc she hears me and she wants to nurse!

    i guess the thing is, it seems like she just doesn't seem to understand when i am talking to her or asking her something....

  8. #8
    brittone2 is offline Blue Diamond level (20,000+ posts)
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    Well, there's "hearing" and then there is hearing Some kids just have a tough time hearing certain types of frequencies. Even if she hasn't had an ear infection, it would be good to rule in/out fluid in the ears, for example. Many people will say they don't have concerns about their child's hearing, but just because she responds to lots of sounds doesn't rule out an issue with hearing certain types of frequencies. We have an audiologist mom or two here, and they can speak to it more specifically. It isn't uncommon to have an issue with only certain frequencies.
    Mama to DS-2004
    DD-2006
    and a new addition-ds born march 2010

  9. #9
    Simon is offline Ruby level (4000+ posts)
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    You are describing Ds2 to a T. He had a receptive delay, just as you describe in your Dd, plus much more of an expressive delay than your Dd. No words at all, or animal sounds, or waving, or pointing, etc. at her same age (and a 5 week age adjustment). Ds1 was super advanced with language so its a big contrast.

    Ds2 did quality for services for the combined delay at around 15 mo and the SLP has given us some good tips over time, but I don't know that it has been the amazing benefit I had hoped for.

    At 2.25 yo, he still doesn't point most of the time. He can/will point to pictures in a book, but rarely does it spontaneously and often not even when he wants something. His expressive language has improved greatly and is likely in or close to the normal range but he continues to have some receptive issues. His hearing has been tested twice (he did have EI and then tubes) but is fine now and has not changed things.

    Most of the tips we're received have to do with supporting general language. Keep instructions simple, use hand gestures to support, use pictures to help comprehension (do you want milk? show picture of milk carton), give her more time for processing. We also let Ds1 know ahead of time that we are directing a question at Ds2 and we do separate them to give Ds2 more one on one time talking time. Another thing I've noticed is that Ds2 needs a lot more repetition (and likes it) compared to Ds1. He also picks up a lot from watching TV. I think sometimes because there isn't the same variation in tone, context, etc. that there is IRL he will watch the same thing over and over and over (like a Dora or Blue's Clues video) and once he is comfortable will start trying out the vocab. or responding to Dora's questions. But it takes him a long time to feel comfortable with trying to answer the questions.
    Ds1 (2006). Ds2 (2010). Ds3 (2012).

  10. #10
    mom2binsd is offline Red Diamond level (10,000+ posts)
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    [QUOTE=brittone2;3491349]If it continues you may want to request a re-eval. When I worked on eval teams we would often tell parents to call in X months if their DC wasn't doing Y and Z at that point.

    The difficulty IMO with recommending ways to work with her is that it depends on the origin of the issue, obviously. So we can give you ideas, but they may or may not be appropriate for her. That's where a professional can really be helpful, because they should be able to get a better idea of why her receptive language is a little behind.

    Does she have a history of ear infections? Has she ever had her hearing checked? I'd probably call EI again and express your concerns-"it is like she doesn't hear me." and go from there. You may want to have private testing done, or private therapy if she doesn't end up qualifying.




    I agree with all of this! (and I'm an SLP/Brittone is an OT and she is very knowledgeable on all things developmental, and she's a Beth like me so she must be genius, just kidding)

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