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  1. #1
    BeachBum is offline Emerald level (3000+ posts)
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    Default What do you and your spouse enjoy doing together?

    DH and I are going through a rough time.... I've been thinking about how many of our before kids activities aren't really practical in our life right now and that we don't seem to have many shared interests or hobbies (outside of the kids and our business which both often feel like obligations) anymore.

    I really want to try to find some "us" time, but I'm having trouble coming up with things that we can do together. We can have some afternoons as well as evening "dates".

    I'm hoping to be inspired...what things do you and your spouse enjoy doing together in your free time? "Little things" are equally as important as big things....

  2. #2
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    karstmama is offline Sapphire level (2000+ posts)
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    diving. yeah, that's a big one, but mama's willing to babysit for up to a week at a time.

    movies, if we can find one we both want to watch. we *do* have some overlap & enjoy them when we can.

    he likes to shoot & is trying to get back into doing it competitively. i'm willing to do some target shooting for an hour or two once in a while.

    sex. had to be said.

    are there any classes at your local community college or center you'd both like? wine tasting, local history, cooking, pottery?
    mama to j karst, former 25 weeker, 12/06

  3. #3
    brittone2 is offline Blue Diamond level (20,000+ posts)
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    We finally interviewed some sitters and one thing we are looking forward to doing again is taking our kayaks out together. Peaceful, relaxing, and something we enjoyed doing pre-kids.

    We like going to a book store and perusing together and then sitting down with something to drink.

    Picnics? In the summer there are a lot of free music and theatre events in many areas, and it can be nice to pack a picnic dinner and enjoy it together.

    SItting on the porch swing outside with a bottle of wine, talking about life, and reconnecting.

    And of course, the more obvious "date" stuff like going out to dinner.

    We prefer dates where we can still talk, because with three kids it can be tough to get that time in otherwise So we are more likely to opt for dinner together rather than a movie, if we had to decide.

    ITA with sex

    eta: going to a local lake or park to talk and walk, sit down on a blanket and chill out together, etc.
    Mama to DS-2004
    DD-2006
    and a new addition-ds born march 2010

  4. #4
    swrc00 is offline Platinum level (1000+ posts)
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    On date nights we typically see a movie and have dinner. I look forward to hearing some other responses, because I think we need to shake it up a bit.
    One thing we do like to do is play board games. We try to play a game once a week after DS goes to bed. I know it is not that exciting, but we do enjoy doing it.

  5. #5
    ray7694 is offline Sapphire level (2000+ posts)
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    We enjoy music and just city events. In honesty I don't think you have to both totally love something to do it. It is give and take in our world. We don't enjoy the same music but take turns at concerts. We don't even like the same sports teams but I went with him to the Cardinals World Series game last year as a Cubs fan no less. It was just great sharing it with him.

  6. #6
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    Without kids:
    Cooking
    Scrabble
    movies
    trying new restaurants
    watching stand-up comedy
    walks (when the weather is nice)
    D, married to B, momma to DD1 (7/08) and DD2 (8/10)

  7. #7
    mackmama is offline Diamond level (5000+ posts)
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    hike
    watch TV/movies
    go out to dinner/brunch/lunch
    have some fancy drinks in a swanky club
    go to a play/theater
    go for walks
    hold hands
    play board games
    browse home decor stores
    relax in the bath or a hot tub
    explore new towns/day trip destinations
    go to a museum
    have a glass of wine on the couch and talk

  8. #8
    SnuggleBuggles is offline Black Diamond level (25,000+ posts)
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    Hiking
    Running
    Walking
    Going to dinner
    Going to/ watching movies
    Playing board games
    Hanging out

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by BeachBum View Post
    I'm hoping to be inspired...what things do you and your spouse enjoy doing together in your free time? "Little things" are equally as important as big things....
    I know this is wrong but my initial reaction is... argue.
    Okay so on to seriousness. We go out to dinner, go to the occasional movies, do our Costco trip together, take a drive, go out for ice-cream, go for a bike ride, drive golf balls, play scrabble, cook together. Oh and make-up sex.
    All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.
    ~Abraham Lincoln~


  10. #10
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    We don't get to go out much. Our baby-sitters are two states away.

    We do go on the occasional lunch date with our youngest in tow while the older two are in school. Not really "us" time but it does give us the chance to sit and talk.

    In the house, we try and do things together, even if they are mundane everyday things. We do the grocery shopping together. If he is washing dishes, I will go and dry them. If I am making dinner, he will help me chop. We turn on the TV and fold laundry together. We like talking walks down to the beach or sitting on our porch swing in the afternoon. He makes fishing lures so while he is working on his lures I will work sit with him and work on any one of my projects. If we are reading, we cuddle up under the same blanket and start a fire in the fireplace.

    For actual dates (when we get them) we go out to eat, go to a bar with friends, go to a concert, go swimming. Once in a while we will go out on a fishing boat in the evening for a couple of hours. It's a treat for him because he loves fishing and rarely gets to go out on the ocean (usually fishes in lakes and streams) and it's a treat for me because it is relaxing to be out on the water at night watching him do what he loves. There's also lots and lots of time to talk and laugh. And you have to laugh...last time he caught four HUGE fish and I (standing right next to him) caught none. But his were delicious.
    Alicia
    Mama to four amazing children.

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