Need some Mommy/Parenting advice

[pinkmomagain]

I am wondering if evening pick up was a time when he had your attention to download his day to you? It must be crazy difficult when you get home from your long commute, but I'm wondering if 15 minutes or so of couch time with discussion of his day might be a good investment?

[BabbyO]

I am wondering if evening pick up was a time when he had your attention to download his day to you? It must be crazy difficult when you get home from your long commute, but I'm wondering if 15 minutes or so of couch time with discussion of his day might be a good investment?

I think you are exactly right. For the next week and a half he'll have to settle for 5-10 min of couch time...but I am going to make a concerted effort to have some 1:1 time before I leave for rehearsal tonight!

[daisymommy]

It sounds to me like it's all about getting your attention, one way or another. Very typical once you have another baby added to the family, and especially if you are working during the day and away from him (not sure if that is the case or not.)
I would do anything you can to baby him a bit and give some extra undivided attention, and trust me, I know how hard that is!

[fedoragirl]

My kids are about the same age as yours and you've just described what happens in our family on a daily basis. DD is super clingy to Dad and doesn't listen to either of us when he's around. The tantrums and whining escalate around dinner time which is when daddy is around. During the day, DD does fine with me (SAHM here) and listens and has fun with me.
She also started exhibiting babyish mannerisms 3-4 months ago--crawling, spitting out food, eating with her hands...a lot of things her brother does.
I have started spending some alone time with her on the weekends--just DD and I. It's been wonderful and she is responding much better. We also just went on a week's vacation and she had daddy's attention all week. She has been great. Isn't it amazing and flattering that just a little attention can fix so many behavioral issues?
I hope you're able to carve out some time for your little man.

[niccig]

DS is an only child and older (8 in a couple of months), but he'll want me to do more things for him after a period of me being busy. Sometimes I get exasperated, but if I catch myself and ask why he wants me to brush his teeth, it's usually "I haven't seen you in a while," or "I'm too tired." Or we'll be on the couch and he curls up in my lap. He's not big for his age, but way toooo big to be in my lap. DH says he's trying to get more "loves" and there will be a time when he won't want hugs from me, so I should enjoy it while it still happens.

[maestramommy]

I think some of it is age, maybe individual personality. You described DD3 pretty well, and she is shy of 3.5. Since she started school she suddenly needs help toileting, getting dressed, EATING(wtf??), and just seems to need me more. OTOH, days like this alternate with days where if I make even a move to help her she is outraged that I'm invading her space, and she has shut the bathroom door in my face more than once. I noticed this behavior earlier this year when I had the sitter over for more hours. She would be much more clingy when I came home. She has always been more willful than the other two, and now she's is just a mule. We do playful parenting, iron boots parenting, 1-2-3 magic, strong-willed child parenting, anything it takes to get through the day.

I know she LOVES school (5 mornings this year), and she has a lot of fun with the sitter. But when I am home she turns into a tree frog that has suddenly lost function of her limbs and brain. Not her tongue though.

[BabbyO]

My kids are about the same age as yours and you've just described what happens in our family on a daily basis. DD is super clingy to Dad and doesn't listen to either of us when he's around. The tantrums and whining escalate around dinner time which is when daddy is around. During the day, DD does fine with me (SAHM here) and listens and has fun with me.
She also started exhibiting babyish mannerisms 3-4 months ago--crawling, spitting out food, eating with her hands...a lot of things her brother does.
I have started spending some alone time with her on the weekends--just DD and I. It's been wonderful and she is responding much better. We also just went on a week's vacation and she had daddy's attention all week. She has been great. Isn't it amazing and flattering that just a little attention can fix so many behavioral issues? I hope you're able to carve out some time for your little man.

Quite right. Last night the sitter and I pulled into the driveway at the same time. I gave Peanut a quick peck on the cheek and let the sitter take him into the house. I grabbed Stachio and asked if he'd help me get the mail. It just seemed to set our evening out on the right foot. He got in the house and did everything I asked right away. This was a miracle since I had 30 min to pack dinner, and bundle the kids off to some family friends who were watching them while I was at rehearsal last night. On the way there, I asked if he missed me and he said he did. I told him he and I were going to have special time together on Saturday. Hopefully this continues to work!

I think some of it is age, maybe individual personality. You described DD3 pretty well, and she is shy of 3.5. Since she started school she suddenly needs help toileting, getting dressed, EATING(wtf??), and just seems to need me more. OTOH, days like this alternate with days where if I make even a move to help her she is outraged that I'm invading her space, and she has shut the bathroom door in my face more than once. I noticed this behavior earlier this year when I had the sitter over for more hours. She would be much more clingy when I came home. She has always been more willful than the other two, and now she's is just a mule. We do playful parenting, iron boots parenting, 1-2-3 magic, strong-willed child parenting, anything it takes to get through the day.

I know she LOVES school (5 mornings this year), and she has a lot of fun with the sitter. But when I am home she turns into a tree frog that has suddenly lost function of her limbs and brain. Not her tongue though.

Oh my gosh..you made me laugh out loud describing your daughter because I must have her fraternal twin at my house! Stachio has asked me to help him eat at almost every meal lately and refuses to use utensils even though he has been using them for years. He's also required me to help in the bathroom...but then in the next breath told me to "go away mama...and be sure to shut the door ALL the way." (We usually leave the door open a crack so we can hear him call when he's done.) Mule and tree frog are apt descriptions here too!

[KDsMommy]

My 5 year old still does this at times. I chalk it up to his traumatic loss of a parent (dad). He is sooooo attached to me, I call him my velcro kid. He still asks for help in the bathroom, help brushing his teeth, help bathing, etc. He needs almost constant reassurance that I'm not going anywhere and will always be there for him. It's hard.