UPDATE in 22: WWYD regarding pregnancy testing? (early loss mentioned)

[Liziz]

Ok, this is mostly for fun because I know everyone has their own opinions, but WWYD in this situation?

I had a very early miscarriage last month (barely 5 weeks). It was very early and we'd only known for a week, but I was pretty upset and emotional for a few days. At the time, I'd commented to DH that if I had just waited to test, I likely would have totally missed the pregnancy, and the miscarriage would have just felt like an exceptionally gross period, but I wouldn't have been so emotionally upset.

When I saw her for the m/c, OB told me that while another pregnancy likely wouldn't happen right away, we didn't need to use protection/wait, but she did want me to start using OPKs because she warned cycles would be wonky for awhile and it would help them date the pregnancy when I got pregnant again.

So, I started using the OPK, and therefore know I ovulated either 14 or 15 days ago.

I'm travelling (airplane) to a big family reunion this weekend, without DH. He's begging me not to test until after I return (so that would put me at 20-21 DPO). His logic is that if I test now, get a positive, and something happens while I'm traveling (i.e. another early m/c), it will ruin my trip. Whereas, if I don't test now, I can't know I'm pregnant...so if I start bleeding while I'm on my trip, I'll just assume it's a late period, won't "know" I'm miscarrying, and will therefore still enjoy my trip.

I completely see his logic, BUT.....if the OPK is accurate (it was one of those Clear Blue digital that gives a smilie face), I'm pretty sure that by this weekend I'd be WAY overdue. Like, overdue enough that I think I'd strongly suspect I was pregnant. And if I started bleeding in that scenario, I think I'd be plagued with "what-if" and wonder for a long time whether it was another early m/c or whether it wasn't. (Strangely enough, the hardest time emotionally for me with early m/c was the day between when I was pretty sure what was happening and when I could see my OB and have her do another HCG test to confirm it. Once I knew for sure, even though I was sad, it was much easier to move on).

SO -- WWYD? Test now? Or wait another WEEK?

[rin]

I *personally* would test, because I am very much a want-to-know person, but I really don't think there's a 'right' answer in this situation!

[lalasmama]

:hugs:

I've been there... many times.

Personally, I'd test. But that's because it would be on my mind no matter what, wondering and contemplating every tinge/bubble/burp if it was morning sickness, a m/c starting, etc. If I test and get a negative, then I relax and retest when I get home. If I test positive, then I'm aware and paying attention to my body, and because of my personal m/c history, I'd know to call my doctor to have my beta-hCGs started.

[PZMommy]

I'd test, as I rather know either way for sure.

[petesgirl]

I'd test, as I rather know either way for sure.

This would be me too.

[123LuckyMom]

I would also test. I'd want to know.

[theriviera]

I've been in the same boat (3 miscarriages) and I waited to test. It actually made me feel more calm.

[mikala]

So sorry for your loss. I've been there and it sucks.

I continued charting temps after my m/c and tested when they jumped. I figured that more information was better for any conversations with my doctor and knew I'd be thinking about it a lot anyway.

Sending pp&t your way!

[SASM]

HUGE hugs. I've been there, without OPKs. I, personally, would test. I am a "need to know" person and it would drive me nuts. Good luck and more hugs! Prayers that you will have a positive pg test.

[calebsmama03]

I'm so sorry for your loss, first of all!
I have done this both ways and will share my experiences for what they're worth. I've had 3 confirmed mc's- 7, 5, and 9 weeks respectively. Prior to the first definite mc I had been late (for me, which is early for most since my cycles are 25days) and tested in day 28, got bfp, then started AF that same night. Assumed I'd had a faulty test and didn't give it another thought till after my first mc when I was told false positives are very rare. After that I always waited to test. Had another late AF and felt some pg symptoms but started AF before I ever tested. Eventually had DC3 so my confidence came back and the next time I was a day late and felt symptoms I tested, got a bfp and ended up mcing just about 5 weeks. In retrospect I wish I hadn't tested that time. Yes, I'd have been going crazy thinking I was pg anyway BUT when the bleeding started I would have felt like I was just being silly. It has a very different emotional impact in my experience. Those other 2 "maybe mc's" I had did not then and do not now have the same emotional impact as the 3 confirmed ones, and I personally feel better answering medical forms about my obstetric history as "G6, P3" instead of G7 or 8 P3. Just my .02 from my own experiences have done it both ways.