How do I force my DH to go to the doctor??

[mmommy]

What finally worked to get my DH to go was his stepmom, a nurse who he greatly respects, sat him down and said "You are not a child. Your family is counting on you. Your kids need you to be healthy so that you can help to support and raise them." He finally went to get a chest X-ray and antibiotics for pneumonia. They wanted to admit him. This was a few years ago, but since then he has been better about going/taking care of himself. Maybe your DH has someone similar who can talk sense to him? Goodness knows I had been on DH for over a month by the time she finally got through to him.

[Corie]

Maybe your DH has someone similar who can talk sense to him? Goodness knows I had been on DH for over a month by the time she finally got through to him.

Unfortunately, no. He cut all ties to his family back in the 90's.

[ExcitedMamma]

Can you get him to go to set a good example for your kids? DS hates shots so we made a point of taking him to see us get our flu shots every year before he got his. DH took DS with him when he need to get an allergy shot too to try and make it less of a big deal to DS. Do you have life insurance for your DH? You could tell him he needs to get a physical and blood work so you could find out what rates he would qualify for.

And I'm sorry, men can be ridiculous about this stuff!

[Indianamom2]

Just off the top of my head here, but is he a car guy? Could you maybe ask him if he would consider not taking his car in to be serviced in 20 years? (or whatever time frame) Maybe that would put it in other non-confrontational terms.....I'd also definitely stress that this is important to you and that you and your kids need him to stick around and be healthy.

[cilantromapuche]

No lie, we know six people who died in the last three weeks. Most were our age (40's) and only one was expected. That got DH's attention right quick. Not only that, he wrote the kids letters in case something happened to him.

[hillview]

Or withholding sex.

Or an incentive program?

[mackmama]

Tell him that you are concerned about him and that you also don't want him to get your kids sick by being contagious. Maybe he'll go re the kids.

[Corie]

Or an incentive program?

I've thought about that too!! LOL!

[kbud]

You can't. I gave up a few years ago with my DH. I had tried everything and it was just making me angry. My DH has severe sleep apnea and has complained about not sleeping for around 10 years. I finally told him to quite complaining to me if he wasn't going to get help I didn't want to hear it. Fast forward about a year and he finally came to me and said he really needed to get help with his sleep. A lot of other things went on with his life and our relationship as well which I think his lack of sleep has mostly caused. He has gone now to a sleep specialist and was officially diagnosed with sever sleep apnea. He was double the "score" for severe apnea. We also found out his chloseteral is high (although at the moment he is sort of ignoring it). I figure one thing at a time. We get the apnea under control and then look into it.

I feel for you though. Overall, my dh is a good guy but I tried everything to go to the dr. The last time he had gone was when he had a vasectomy and after that he told me the dr said he didn't have to go back until he was 50...I am certain he misunderstood and 50 was related to a colonoscopy.

Anyhow, there really is nothing you can do. They have to decide to do it on their own...sorry. I know how frustrating it is.

[dogmom]

Honestly, I have no patience for that kind of stuff, but I'm a nurse. It would be grounds for threatening divorce as far as I'm concerned. It's incredible selfish. Some stupid, non-fact based point of macho pride about no doctor for 20 years and you are at risk for many disease (hypertension/diabetes) that you won't have symptoms for until it's late in the process. If caught early it can make a huge difference in decreasing your risk for things like heart attacks, aneurysms, strokes. All can either kill or leave your husband depending on you for decades.

It's SELFISH.
It's STUPID.
It's not something you should put up with.
It is part of being a parent and a spouse to freaking take care of your health. It is a worse betrayal than infidelity as far as I'm concerned.

That's what I would tell him.