N-Word on the Bus. How Would You Handle?

[robinsmommy]

Echoing what PP's said and would let the school and bus admin handle it - report anonymously. I would not let this slide. Um, garden variety sexual harassment? I think they need to cover better bus manners and do some education on discrimination and equality. That behavior is not ok anymore - this is the time to start teaching kids to do better.

I would not call parents. Sadly, you never really know what beliefs are shared inside a home and it could come back to bite you and DC, even if you just called the parents of the child you knew - word could get around about you speaking up. The girl using that word to tease learned that behavior somewhere - possibly at home.

[bisous]

Echoing what PP's said and would let the school and bus admin handle it - report anonymously. I would not let this slide. Um, garden variety sexual harassment? I think they need to cover better bus manners and do some education on discrimination and equality. That behavior is not ok anymore - this is the time to start teaching kids to do better.

I would not call parents. Sadly, you never really know what beliefs are shared inside a home and it could come back to bite you and DC, even if you just called the parents of the child you knew - word could get around about you speaking up. The girl using that word to tease learned that behavior somewhere - possibly at home.

I agree with all of this. I think in this modern world I'd use caution when dealing with potentially racist/prejudiced families. My DH lived in NC for awhile and encountered not a small amount of racism there. There is a lot of scary stuff. I think an adult can be pretty up front about a lot of stuff but I'd be cautious to involve my kids, in any way. The school and the transportation company can better handle it without any possible implication for your children.

[squimp]

I would call the principal. Stuff like this is happening (we had swastikas in the bathroom this year), and the principal should be aware so they can discuss and set expectations. They invited in a Holocaust survivor to speak this year, and that had an impact on kids. I don't really consider this the transportation folks' issue, since they answer to the district here. The bus goes to a school. The principal or superintendent is the overseer or the school community.

I would like to think we live in a world where you could tell the parents, but you never really know how it would be received and how it would affect your child.

That said, if the child made a comment like that while in my care, I would tell the parents. It takes a village.

[ang79]

In our district I would report that to the school. At our intermediate buildings we now have a dean of students who handles stuff like this (who would also collaborate with principal, guidance counselor, and teacher of student if need be). At elementary level I would talk to the principal and guidance counselor. We have anti bullying and positive behavior programs that this would definitely violate and staff would take it very seriously.

I think (or at least hope!) that parents (and students) will take it more seriously if the school contacts them vs. another parent. And once the school is made aware they can watch out for continued problems on the bus, in class, at recess, and at school functions.


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[georgiegirl]

WOW I'd call and email both the school and the bus company WOW

That’s what I would do.

A few years ago, DD overheard something semi-racist and I reported it to the bus company (it was one of their monitors who said it.). The monitor had asked a (Muslim) girl her name, and the girl replied, “Fatima,” and the monitor said (in a not so nice tone according to my DD), “what kind of name is that?” The question was not a genuine “I’m interested in your culture question” but a that’s a weird name sort of way.


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[Kindra178]

I would call the school. I would not call parents.


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[HannaAddict]

You can put a call into the transportation department that there is inappropriate language being spoken on bus # XX. Give them that heads up and leave it alone.

I would not give specific names it could come back on your kid. Just let them know and let them handle it. This will not be the worse thing your daughter hears through her school years. Yes it needs to be addressed but sounds like kids carrying on. I don't agree with the N word and the school should address it.

I would hope that would be one of the worst things, I’d not the worst thing, my kid hears. I don’t really care about swearing or crude crap, but that word is a big deal around here and would be a call to school - not just the transportation department.


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[hillview]

I listen to a lot of hip-hop and have been known to say it when I'm singing in the car. In general, though, I tend to use "negro" in that way. ("These negros are crazy.")
"

I am so sorry but I feel compelled to say something -- I just don't understand this at all. Are you black? If you are not I cannot imagine why you would use this word ever.

I listen hip hop too.

[carolinacool]

I am so sorry but I feel compelled to say something -- I just don't understand this at all. Are you black? If you are not I cannot imagine why you would use this word ever.

I listen hip hop too.

I am.

Which is why I said it was complicated. My thoughts on that word and black people using it have jumped all over the past 20 years. But what the OP describes, several white kids on a bus using it, is definitely a no with me.

[hillview]

I am.

Which is why I said it was complicated. My thoughts on that word and black people using it have jumped all over the past 20 years. But what the OP describes, several white kids on a bus using it, is definitely a no with me.

aha ok same page