We have a history of a not-good relationship with ILs. To sum it up, DH is the jerk, sister is the princess, and brother is the baby. We get along with brother. Sister is helpless and whiny and annoying. Not a horrible person, but not someone that we care to spend time with, either. And her husband is a piece of work. They are careless parents, mooch off my in laws, and are just....boring. Plus did I mention the neediness?
Anyway, sister decided to have a half bday for her DD. We were told a couple months ago it would be on a Sunday. We kinda rolled our eyes, as we helped to celebrate her bday with gifts and everything 6 months ago. But they want to have a party at the ILs house (farmland in the middle of nowhere, in July, and convenient for no one) with more family. We got the FB invite and the party is on a Saturday that we have expensive concert tickets that we bought 5 months ago. Today I responded that we can't make it, have longstanding plans, have a fun party. As expected, within 30 minutes, MIL sent DH a text (meaning that sister, at her "very busy" job, had the time to go on FB and text her mom about it). The text said that they are so sorry that we can't make the party and that maybe one day we won't have longstanding plans for a party at their house, but she won't hold her breath. WTF?! Now, while in retrospect I could have given a big explanation to the entire guest list on FB about my weekend plans (concert tickets), is that how you talk to your child? We have seen them 7 times in the last month (2 bday parties, party at our house, recital, concert, graduation day, Fathers Day). That's more than we see them in a typical year! But because it's the fragile, sensitive, suffering sisters party....
I am so tired of dealing with this! I want to say something, but they don't say anything to me. It has been like this my entire marriage, brother and cousins see it, so it's not in our heads. But we are the bad guys. Always the bad guys. Two years ago, we went with brother and wife to a sporting event that brother coachs and our DS plays in. SIL posted a pic on FB. Sister called her parents and DH was lectured about not including his sister over the course of months. But MIL can have brunches at her house and not invite us or drive daily to brothers house (passing by our house, saying we should drive to see them because it's so far). The hypocrisy is high. I really try to be respectful of my inlaws, but I'm also tired of holding my tongue.
Anyway, I needed to get that off my chest, so thanks.....