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  1. #61
    almostmom is offline Sapphire level (2000+ posts)
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    This is an amusing thread!

    I would definitely ask to borrow them! I can't think of any reason why she would be annoyed - they were your boots to begin with! I still have hiking boots that I bought 20 years ago and I love them. I used to do tons of backpacking, and I love those boots. They are definitely more comfortable than if I bought new ones, so I don't think you need to assume they are terrible because they are old. That style of boot is also forgiving - not all leather and stiff. And it looks like they fit. So absolutely, I would ask if I could use them for the weekend.

    Now, if you have super smelly sweaty feet, then it might alter my thinking a little. But really, they are your boots and my guess is she will laugh and say of course.

    If somehow it does squig her out, but she feels like she has to say yes? Whatever, she wasn't going to wear them anyway and she'll get over it.

    I do wear sneakers when I hike sometimes. But those boots will be much better for stability.

    Have fun!
    Liz

    DS 11/03
    DD 12/05

  2. #62
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    Default Would you ask for these back?

    Quote Originally Posted by basil View Post
    I never asked if it was “gross”. Clearly I don’t have germ hang ups re: shoes if I was considering it. I guess others do. I don’t.

    I would imagine my SIL feel pretty neutral about being asked to borrow something she won’t be using. Maybe she would even be happy? I feel good when I can help someone with a minimum amount of effort. Guess you wouldn’t feel that way?

    I actually think it’s pretty comparable to asking for the bounce house back, minus the weirdness other people feel over shoes. How is it different?

    People saying boots may not be as good as they once were or I shouldn’t hike in boots I haven’t worn in a while have good points. I sort of like to save my running shoes for the treadmill so they are inside only, and don’t really have any other sneakers that aren’t “fashion” sneakers like superstars or converse. But I’ll figure something out.
    Asking to borrow someone shoes is gross to me, so even if they had been “mine” I would never ever ask to borrow hiking shoes in particular or want to loan. That is one reason not to ask, since you say you wouldn’t ask unless they had been yours. The ick factor is real for something you sweat in like that. I’d be happy to loan you a backpack, tent, even a sleeping bag I would wash after. But not shoes or boots. You asked so don’t get upset when people give you their honest answer. It is your choice what to do and don’t see why you would ask people on a message board if you didn’t think asking your SIL was weird or off-putting. Good luck and enjoy the hike in any case. I think asking for a bounce house back after twenty years would be odd too! But the comparison ad you gave it makes it irrelevant. And new justifications that you now only wear your tennis shoes indoors make me think this is just silly to keep thinking about.


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    Last edited by HannaAddict; 06-15-2018 at 03:51 PM.

  3. #63
    Percycat is offline Platinum level (1000+ posts)
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    I'm not sure what the problem is. If you don't feel uncomfortable asking your SIL to borrow hiking boots.... ask her if you can borrow them. I wouldn't make a point to identify the shoes as your old shoes.

  4. #64
    NCGrandma is offline Emerald level (3000+ posts)
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    This thread just proves that you can never predict what topic will strike a nerve on the BBB!! (Well, I guess there are some old reliables like yoga pants...)


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  5. #65
    basil is offline Sapphire level (2000+ posts)
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    Ok I was honestly not really thinking that some people have shoe issues when I posted. I was thinking more of level of familiarity and the potential interpretation that I was trying to reclaim the boots or was upset about their being gifted, which I wasn’t. It’s a level of familiarity that I would like to get to with SIL but don’t think I have yet. Anyway.

    I actually think the bounce house example is pretty comparable. If I had purchased a bounce house and my uncle knew I had it, he never would have asked to borrow it. But because he had given it to me as a hand me down he felt it was ok to ask for it. And I would have felt pretty weird if I had bought a bounce house and he asked to borrow it (for strangers’ kids to use). But because it was a hand me down, I think it would have been incredibly rude for me to have said no!!

    SIL and I don’t normally share on the level of my parents and I or my brother and I. I’m not sure if that’s odd or not or if that’s a good thing or not. She’s a perfectly nice person and I don’t harbor any ill will towards her. Our 4 in our nuclear family are very close and my DH has complained about that in that he sometimes feels excluded so I wonder if SIL does too.

    I wonder if the people who thought I shouldn’t ask because I gave them up years ago think I should have said no to my uncle about the bounce house.

  6. #66
    hwin708 is offline Platinum level (1000+ posts)
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    I would be surprised if your SIL had germ issues with lending her shoes.... given that she took a pair of used shoes.

    Like is she really going to say "I don't want you getting your sweat and skin cells in the shoes.... again."?

  7. #67
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    The bounce house situation is totally different. It’s a useful kids item and isn’t user-specific. I’m not grossed out by using other people’s shoes (DD and I share), but I feel like shoes that mold to someone’s foot might not be comfortable plus, and more importantly, I can’t imagine wearing 20 year old hiking boots. I feel like they wouldn’t be comfortable (for hiking) and the materials have likely degraded. It just seems like an odd request to ask for 20 year old shoes.


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  8. #68
    jenstring95 is offline Platinum level (1000+ posts)
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    I haven't read most of the responses, but I have tried to wear some of my really old shoes. I was not successful, as some of them disintegrated as I walked. One pair pretty much melted to my feet (sandals, and it really hurt taking them off!). I wouldn't wear shoes that old on a camping trip without sufficient time to test them out beforehand because you don't want to be caught off the beaten path somewhere without functional shoes!

  9. #69
    MMMommy is offline Diamond level (5000+ posts)
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    Is there an update, OP? What happened ultimately?

  10. #70
    mommy111 is offline Diamond level (5000+ posts)
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    Quote Originally Posted by NCGrandma View Post
    This thread just proves that you can never predict what topic will strike a nerve on the BBB!! (Well, I guess there are some old reliables like yoga pants...)


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    well I guess we can add borrowing hiking boots to that list!
    '...everything can be taken from a man but one thing, the Last of the Human Freedoms, the ability to choose one's behavior in any set of circumstances, the Freedom to Choose One's Own Way.' -Viktor Frankle

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