Would you ask for these back?

[mackmama]

Decades later?


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Totally- they were hers! Granted I likely wouldn’t ask for them back because they’re so old, but I think she’s completely entitled to do so. I think it’s weird the SIL took them without asking her. No one would ever just help themselves to my stuff that’s been sitting in my parents’ house for 20 years.

[georgiegirl]

Totally- they were hers! Granted I likely wouldn’t ask for them back because they’re so old, but I think she’s completely entitled to do so. I think it’s weird the SIL took them without asking her. No one would ever just help themselves to my stuff that’s been sitting in my parents’ house for 20 years.

It sounded like the mom was cleaning stuff out. I feel like there’s no claim after 20 years unless it’s sentimental stuff like pictures, jewelry, etc. If she really wanted the hiking boots, she should have taken them back to her house at least 15 years ago. It’s one thing to store stuff in your parents home when you are in college or grad school. But once you are settled into a home (that has space), then do your parents a favor and take your junk out of their house and into yours.


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[dogmom]

I’m just stuck on the fact you can recognize them! I swear I find shoes on my closet that have to be mine and think, “did I buy those?”

[TwinFoxes]

I don’t think she has ever worn them.

Then why were they in her hallway after years and years?

I do think it would be, I guess odd, to ask for them back. I'm really curious, do you like your SIL?

If your SIL didn't have them, would you go to your mother's house and dig the boots out?

[bisous]

I hike in sneakers, unless I'm carrying a big pack. My 20 year old hiking boots would be stiff and uncomfortable now, I'd never want to wear them or even look at them again!

Yes, to hiking in running shoes or sneakers! I feel like on most trails they are better for the trail. Do you have some of those OP?

[hwin708]

I can just see the thread now from a mom saying “my MIL was cleaning out her closets and gave me a pair of hiking boots left behind over 15 years ago by her daughter (my SIL) and now my SIL has asked for them back or to “borrow” - isn’t this weird?” I think the responses of how out of touch and bizarre her SIL is would go on for awhile.

Idk. I think if someone here posted "My sister-in-law is going camping and asked if she can borrow a pair of hiking boots I never use, so she doesn't have to buy shoes just for this weekend," I would respond with yes, lend her the boots. Why wouldn't you lend her the boots?? I'm sure there would be some comments from people who have shoe issues. But I don't think the overriding sentiment would be that a family member asking to borrow something is such an outrageous situation.

I think the original post just focused too much on the history of the boots. In terms of manners, the history doesn't matter any more. The boots were given to her, they are hers now. So the question is "Can I ask my sister-in-law if I can borrow her boots?" Which, unless you have some kind of strained relationship with her, seems like a no-brainer. Just like you asked her husband for his backpack, you can ask her for her boots. If you are concerned that she may feel like you are trying to "reclaim" the boots as your own, the fact that she knows you are already borrowing something else from her husband should lessen the chance she would draw such a conclusion.

[basil]

LOL!!

OMG, I swear I thought this thread would get like 3 responses

So they are good boots and my mother is a Yankee and wouldn't throw something good out. A few years ago, I think 4, DB/SIL moved back from Europe and sold/gave away a lot of stuff, were unemployed, and had previously been on a tight grad student budget anyway. So I can completely imagine SIL not having winter boots, and my mom being like "Oh, basil has these old hiking boots, I was going to give them to Goodwill, do you want them?" And SIL being like "hey, free boots, cool" It's possible my mom even asked me, I wouldn't remember. At the time I was living like 500 miles away from them. I'm not at all upset about this part of the story. I actually like giving stuff to family because it makes me feel better about my packrat tendencies to have stuff put to good use. I saw the boots some time ago and I was like "how weird that SIL has the same old hiking boots as me, since she grew up in Europe" then my mom explained they used to be mine.

I was talking to my mom today about the hike and she offered for me to use some of her hiking boots, that's why I thought of my old boots/SIL's boots. But then I thought that may be weird. Would it be weird if she were my sister?

Now SIL has other boots. She doesn't hike. DB/SIL live a mile away from me. I am at their house tonight babysitting their baby while they are out. The boots are fine. They fit and are comfortable.

Anyway, I actually don't think SIL would be offended, but I guess I won't take the chance.

Here are the boots!

IMG_0124.jpg

[BunnyBee]

LOL!!

OMG, I swear I thought this thread would get like 3 responses

So they are good boots and my mother is a Yankee and wouldn't throw something good out. A few years ago, I think 4, DB/SIL moved back from Europe and sold/gave away a lot of stuff, were unemployed, and had previously been on a tight grad student budget anyway. So I can completely imagine SIL not having winter boots, and my mom being like "Oh, basil has these old hiking boots, I was going to give them to Goodwill, do you want them?" And SIL being like "hey, free boots, cool" It's possible my mom even asked me, I wouldn't remember. At the time I was living like 500 miles away from them. I'm not at all upset about this part of the story. I actually like giving stuff to family because it makes me feel better about my packrat tendencies to have stuff put to good use. I saw the boots some time ago and I was like "how weird that SIL has the same old hiking boots as me, since she grew up in Europe" then my mom explained they used to be mine.

I was talking to my mom today about the hike and she offered for me to use some of her hiking boots, that's why I thought of my old boots/SIL's boots. But then I thought that may be weird. Would it be weird if she were my sister?

Now SIL has other boots. She doesn't hike. DB/SIL live a mile away from me. I am at their house tonight babysitting their baby while they are out. The boots are fine. They fit and are comfortable.

Anyway, I actually don't think SIL would be offended, but I guess I won't take the chance.

Here are the boots!

IMG_0124.jpg

You're close enough to them to babysit for them? You're close enough to risk being weird and ask to use the boots.

[basil]

And I just got a text from my uncle asking to borrow back a bouncy house that he gave us as a hand-me-down last year, and I managed to not be upset.

[Snow mom]

I hope those are your feet trying on the hiking boots Yes, I'd ask to borrow them if you'd like to borrow them. She may honestly not really want them anymore and be happy to pass them on with what you've said. I wouldn't make a big thing of the fact that they were yours--just ask if you can borrow them for the upcoming hike. I don't think it's weird as long as you ask once (and only once). Fwiw, my hiking boots are also 20 now and they are still good boots.