I can certainly relate. I started going to therapy almost 2 years ago because I was dying inside and could not figure out why H wasn't seeing it, or hearing my exact words begging for help and an equal status in the marriage. I started therapy on my own which really helped me appropriately frame what was going on in my marriage and my life. When H started coming to the therapy with me, the therapist recommended the show/film Fair Play (it's on Prime) and the "game" that goes with it. I highly recommend getting your husband to watch the show with you. I got SO MUCH from it in feeling not-alone, and my H's responses to the show were eye opening to me.
I hope that you get the results you're seeking by trying therapy and watching that show together. Personally, it all fed into me eventually filling for divorce, which I'm still mired in. I'm not saying that's where you'll end up, just letting you know my results. But both gave me the clarity to really see and acknowledge the state of our marriage.
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Mama to DS1 Punkin (2/04) and DS2 Boo (1/09)