What do you do about keeping/returning jewelery from DH?

I should preface this by saying I have very specific ideas of what I would like and very often my sweet DH buys me things that I love. However, he also often buys me jewelery that I'm not so crazy about. I always end up exchanging or returning the things I'm not so crazy about since it seems like such a waste of money and he usually doesn't seem to mind one way or the other.

Recently, however, he purchased a David Yurman ring and bracelet, both of which I wanted to exchange. The ring was my fault, I had specifically said that I liked it but in person it was just way too small. My poor DH was very, very upset and absolutely insisted that I keep the bracelet, I guess b/c he had actually picked it out of his own volition. Now it seems to me that it is such a waste of money for me to have a relatively expensive bracelt that I'm not crazy about but he was persistent and I had to simply keep it.

I'm *always* appreciative that he thought to buy me something but just can't get over them being wasteful. Just curious how others handle this.

[deenass]

I'm very particular about my jewelery so I have a standing agreement with my husband that he won't buy me anything that I haven't pikced out or that I can't return or exchange. So, if he picks it out and I don't like it, he already knows that it's going back (and he knows that when he picks it out, so he's not hurt or offended).

[crl]

We have sort of the opposite thing. Dh always insists that I can exchange the jewelry and his feelings won't be hurt. I never do. He picks out beautiful stuff--and the jewelry is a rare gift anyway. It's not always what I would have chosen, but sometimes I end up liking it better that what I would have chosen. And I know he really tries hard to think of what I would like and I love that as much as the actual jewelry. So, I've never taken him up on his offers for exchanging. Oh, and I always end up wearing it at least some of the time.

[houseof3boys]

I'm lucky that DH doesn't seem to be bothered when I don't like something. I have always told him that if I gave him something and he didn't like it, he needs to tell me because it doesn't do anyone any good sitting somewhere unused. No hurt feelings have ever come of it from either of us.

Maybe try again with telling him that the bracelet and ring are different than you thought and that maybe you can go shopping together and pick something new out. Tell him he was soooo sweet and you love the thought but maybe you could find something that you are more excited about that he likes too.

I hope it goes well! :)

[Marisa6826]

Jonathan only "buys" what I pick out when I'm with him ;)

Saves a lot of aggravation on both ends

-m

DH hasn't bought me jewelry since my engagement ring. Well he has, but in the form of "I want to get you something for giving birth, go pick it out." I know it sounds unromantic, but I have to say I prefer it this way. Oh and my engagement ring, we shopped together, I picked one out, he bought it and then didn't propose for several months. Turns out he didn't like the fact that I knew I was getting a ring and that I had a say in which one it was, so he returned that ring and got a different one. The ring is lovely (has since been upgraded however), but I do prefer picking out my own jewelry, especially the pieces I wear on a daily basis.

[MelissaTC]

I am VERY particular about jewelry. Having said that, DH has bought me a couple of things in recent years that I would never have picked out for myself.

When I had DS, I envisioned DH buying me a beautiful tanzanite piece (I ****LOVE**** tanzanite). Instead, he bought me a pair of sapphire earrings set in white gold with diamonds. VERY fancy and VERY not me. I was disappointed and I could see that he was hurt. I went to the jewelry store with my Mom to scope out if there was anything else and the saleslady remembered my DH. She told me that he was there a couple of times before purchasing and was insistent that he find the "perfect" piece of jewelry for me. In the end, he chose the earrings. I felt like a total heel for hurting his feelings and decided that because he gave it to me, I was going to keep them. They have grown on me and now I love them because they were a gift from him.

Last year, he gave me a gold heart shaped locket with a photo of him and DS inside. I am not a locket person by any means but I love it because he really thought that all Moms should have a locket. It was sweet.

So I guess my point is that I take what he gives me. And yes, I did eventually wind up with tanzanite studs :P

Forget about the wasteful aspect.
It seems that it is really important to him that you like this present.
Why not just wear it occasionally when you are out with him.
Sometimes the good feelings are worth much more than the jewelry which is just "stuff".
He obviously enjoyed buying this for you and he is more likely to want to buy you spontaneous things in the future if he thinks you appreciate his taste.

[August Mom]

Generally, DH has excellent taste in jewelry and I really like what he buys. However, there was one birthday gift that I didn't like that well. It was a emerald ring (which I would like), but the emerald was TINY. I don't like really large stones or pieces of jewelry because my fingers are so small. But, this ring just wasn't quite right. I guess he could tell I wasn't thrilled from my reaction when I opened it. He seemed very hurt. And, I later found out that he had a rationale for it being small. He thought that have a small stone that was basically flush with the ring would be better for everyday wear - wouldn't catch on things, less likelihood of dislodging the stone, wouldn't scratch DS. Frankly, I never thought of those things. He obviously thought it through. So, although I wanted to take it back, I didn't. However, I also seldom wear it. If it's really going to bother your DH, though, I'd still keep the piece and wear it occasionally when you're with him.

I'm thinking long and hard about what I do when Steve gives me jewelery that I don't think is my taste...still thinking...still thinking...well we'll be here a while since he has never just out of the blue given me jewelery without me picking it out :)...I've never been suprised...lucky you to have a hubby that would do such a great thing!!!!!!!!

But I agree with you it would be sad to have the money wasted if you know you would not use it, I'm with you I'd trade it in for something I'd love to wear!!!!!

Wonder if this will "train" (gosh sorry hate to use that word, but the best word escapes me) DH to in the future give you like a "coupon" of sorts, or let you keep a wish list!!!!
If he loves to suprise you then maybe keeping a wish list is the thing to do...

Keep us posted :)...

Neve
http://home.nc.rr.com/ourbabytristan
AKA "mama2be"-forgot password
and Baby Boy Tristan born @UNC
Feb 25, 2003
Brother to 3 pups "gees" and 2 kitties