How to approach boss with pumping schedule?

[pinkflamingo]

Hi- I am back at work and the students are back next week. I want to pump when I get to work every morning, from 8:30-8:50. I can't do it any later as students will be in my room. I am required to be at work by 8:25 and can't get there much earlier as my son has to be dropped off at his school (20 mins away by 8 AM). It will interfere with a morning duty and also I will have to leave faculty meetings 10 minutes early. I have a female boss but I also need to run this by a male boss as well as he creates the schedule. Thoughts? I am thinking an email will be less embarassing?
The other times I need to pump are fine, I will not have to miss anything (they are during my lunch and conference breaks.)

[lizzywednesday]

nak

Can you take advantage of the fact that August is Nat'l BFing Awareness Month?

Also, is it more embarrassing to you to leak (which could happen if you don't pump) or mention pumping/breastfeeding? (For me, it's leaking!)

[wendibird22]

I would do it in person. Embarrassing for both parties, probably, but I think easier to explain the what's and why's in person. I would hate for the request to be viewed as wanting special treatment or something else misinterpreted if done via email. And it is possible that either one or both of these bosses (can't assume the female is a BF/pumping expert) won't understand why you need the break or can't do it some other time/place. I would approach it very straight forward, that you BF your child and therefore need to pump while at work and that you need to do that 3x's a day for x# of weeks/months. You want to do so with minimal disruption to your schedule and have determined you can pump at the following 3x's but that the morning session will require a small change to the normal schedule. Ask if that is acceptable and if not, can s/he propose an alternative.

FWIW, last week our entire staff had a day-long retreat off-site complete with small group community service project. I knew I'd need to pump at least once during that time and would have to break away from the group at some point for 15mins. I told my boss (male) that I was giving him a heads up because I didn't want anyone else to question him where I went and for so long and have him not know. We joked about it being TMI and that he can please now forget we ever had the conversation. He even joked about me spraying everywhere. It was weird and uncomfortable but I was glad that I did it in person.

[wellyes]

I think being very matter-of-fact about it is the key to the conversation not being embarrassing. I'd personally want to have the conversation it in person. Especially if either of the bosses isn't experienced with nursing / pumping and may not understand the logistics ..... how long it takes, how often you need to do it, etc. Clarifying those things might take 2 minutes in conversation but might make for some awkward email messages.

I'd emphasize that you've found a way to do most of it without interfering with your day-to-day schedule. I'd also mention that this is relatively short-term and that pumping scales back over time. (3-4x per day at the beginning but less frequently within 6 months, or whatever you're planning).

FWIW, last week our entire staff had a day-long retreat off-site complete with small group community service project. I knew I'd need to pump at least once during that time and would have to break away from the group at some point for 15mins. I told my boss (male) that I was giving him a heads up because I didn't want anyone else to question him where I went and for so long and have him not know. We joked about it being TMI and that he can please now forget we ever had the conversation. He even joked about me spraying everywhere. It was weird and uncomfortable but I was glad that I did it in person.

Ewww. I don't like him. Just to contrast, I nervously broached the subject with my boss, a woman in her 60s, and she just said "Whatever you need to do is fine, take as much time as you need" and that was that.

[wendibird22]

Originally Posted by wellyes

Ewww. I don't like him. Just to contrast, I nervously broached the subject with my boss, a woman in her 60s, and she just said "Whatever you need to do is fine, take as much time as you need" and that was that.

He was actually fine. The whole thing is just weird to discuss with a male boss, but he's mentored me for the last 9yrs so it was more like telling your brother you have to pump. And our whole department is notorious for "going there" with just about any conversation that could end up in the gutter pretty regularly so when I said if I didn't pump we'd have problems, his joke about spraying was funny. And he did tell me to do what I needed to do when I needed to and that I was the last person on staff he would worry about "disappearing" for 15mins.

Sorry to hijack OP. All this to say I think I built it up in my head that it was going to be more awkward than it ended up being.

[pantrygirl]

I'm glad wendi had a good experience.

I'm sending out good vibes for everyone else.

Don't be nervous. It's your right and you're not asking to take a break to smoke crack or something.

Hugs.

[BabyBearsMom]

I think that doing it face to face is better because it is harder for them to say no. I have a male boss and before I went on maternity leave I had told him that I planned to nurse and would be pumping when I got back (I agreed to come back after 8 weeks instead of 12 weeks because we are a small group and it is really hard when you are down one person, so I mentioned it when we were negotiating to set the stage). Then, once I went back I just point blank told him when I planned to nurse. He asked that I block off my calendar for those times so everyone could plan ahead, I agreed and it has worked great since then.

I think being professional and direct about it helped. Plus, having a male boss could help. Most men are so mortified about breast feeding they will agree to anything to avoid discussing it.

[wendibird22]

Originally Posted by BabyBearsMom

Plus, having a male boss could help. Most men are so mortified about breast feeding they will agree to anything to avoid discussing it.

Yeah, sometimes it's like tossing them a live grenade!

[DebbieJ]

your right to pump might be protected by law in your state, too.

http://www.llli.org/Law/LawUS.html?m=0,1,0

[Momof3Labs]

Okay, I'm a pumping mom, but I have to say, with this interfering with a morning duty and causing you to leave a faculty meeting 10 minutes early every day - I think that you need to figure something else out in terms of your pumping schedule. Maybe you pump early in the morning before baby wakes, then nurse baby before leaving for work. And yes, you can do that and your body will adjust to it - I've done it. Or pump during your 20 minute drive between your DS's school and work (I haven't pumped while drivng but there are moms that do and can give you tips on it). Or have someone else do the school drop-off and get to work earlier to squeeze it in before 8:25.

Yes, the law protects your right to pump, but not to pump whenever you want. Since you are trying to pump right when you get to work, I think that you can figure out something that won't get in the way of your morning duties.