Bday Party - is this normal?

[DietCokeLover]

DCs were invited to attend their first birthday party. It was at one of those bounce type places. Is it normal that all of the parents that were there gathered along the walls and played on their phones? Every single one of them. I don't have a phone that does that kind of thing, so I went out on the floor and interacted with my DC and other kids and the bday girl's grandparents.

I thought this was very strange, but again... it's the first party we have been to.

[Ceepa]

We've been to the gymnastics parties where the boys and girls are kind of led through activities by staff so the parents kind of mill about and socialize, others watch. Older kids in groups are more self-directed but if the kids are young and no one is leading them in an activity I would get out there and interact with my DC just like you did.

[kerridean]

Well it depends. My girls are 5 and 7 so I usually do let them do their own thing at parties with their friends. I like to give them their independence and use it as a little "break" for me. As far as socializing with other parents, if I know them I will socialize the entire time. If do not know them however, I will try my best to be friendly but often times I am not in the mood so you may find me staring at my phone.

[kristenk]

Now I'm one of the parents talking or playing with my phone, but I wasn't when DD was younger. When DD was little, I'd sort of follow her around a little if she wanted me to. At a birthday party, though, I'd encourage her to play with her friends. I'd still keep an eye on her, of course.

I've always assumed that adults are not necessarily wanted on all of the equipment, especially on a busy day. I've gone on a few of the things when DD and I went by ourselves one day, but only when it's not busy and only when DD wouldn't go by herself!

[WatchingThemGrow]

I'm going to guess it was random people who all know the bday girl's parents, but who didn't know one another? At a party we went to today, most everyone was talking and catching up as we've known one another before DC arrived. The one family who only knew the bday girl's family was wandering around alone. Maybe bounce-house type places aren't exactly good places for conversation?

[Gena]

I guess what "normal" depends on your social circle. The non-family birthday parties DS gets invited to are for special needs kids and have mostly SN kids in attendance. The bounce places are popular with our crowd (and the local ones do a great job with our special kids). Many of the parents get involved and actively play on the equipment. We also spend time socializing. And usually there are a couple of parents taking pictures to email to everyone later.

But that's our group of families. I don't know if families of all typical kids may do things differently.

[wellyes]

Depends on the child's age and level of social comfort. I would not ignore my 7 month old, but I would stay out of my almost-3-year-olds way as she interacted with other kids.

[crl]

Well, I have only gone to parties at that sort of place after ds was in K. And they were mostly classmates parents. So we socialized with each other.

Catherine

[DietCokeLover]

I wasn't trying to imply that I was interfering with my children while they were playing. I was just standing nearby watching them, laughing with them, responding to the "Mommy, watch me"'s.

I guess I was just surprised that more people weren't interacting with one another. I was all set to go and be friendly and visit with some new people (I only knew the parents of the bday girl and the grandparents), but everyone else had their head down watching their phones, so I was just surprised that there wasn't more chatting.

[AshleyAnn]

In our area this would be pretty normal. Absolutely no socialization between the parents sounds a pretty odd but if the kids are entertaining themselves its rare to see a parent get involved in thier play. I've only been to one bounce house style party and some parents choose to stand to the side and veg while others choose to play but they we're really playing "with" the kids so much as just enjoying the fun party place (it was a HUGE maze/obstacle course like thing)