UPDATE :) Bad parenting = possible cavity

[veronica]

update:

We went yesterday and good news:
My dentist is still hot. Oh, and it's not cavities. She is wearing her teeth down a bit. A combination of grinding (no surprise coming from her TMJ-grinding-clenching mom) and biting down on hard candies (tootsie pops and ring pops from my uncle). He says we need to keep an eye on it to make sure it does not get worse because then we need to talk about either caps or seals . I wish I could post a pic because it looks so bad-qute scary really. I'm just releived it's not something worse. He said his own son had it pretty bad and they were worried the molars would even last until they fall out near 12 YO but they made it!

Then I had DS pop up for a quick look. He is much more timid but likes to copy big sis. He had a small spot of the same and the dentist did find the start of a small cavity. We talked in code about the "big C" and he said we could discuss it at the cleaning in a few weeks. I think it might be too small to fill just yet.


I am so incredibly sad. We have been so busy with the babies and , while we still brush ODD and ODS every night and morning, we have not been brushing for as long nor flossing as much.

Last night, the kids wanted to floss and while flossing DD, I see a strange thing on one of her molars. It was night, a little dark and I made a note to check it out this morning. I grabbed the flashlight and took a look and the side of one of her molars seems oddly shaped , like the enamel is so uneven. I'm pretty sure it's a good sized cavity.

I am devastated for her. We have always taken such great care of teeth here. I've always been a bit nuts over it. We take the kids to my childhood dentist, who I have a not-so-secret crush on and he always comments on all of our teeth. Now, we've got an appaointment on Thursday and I'm scared.

What should I expect on how they will treat it? She's never had films done or any dental work, aside from our bi-annual cleanings. She's not terribly afraid of anything either....

[maylips]

I don't have any advice, other than to tell you that you're NOT a bad parent. Some kids are more prone to cavities than others, some kids have deeper recesses in their teeth that make bad things pool quicker...there are all types of reasons other than how distracted a parent is.

Good luck! She'll live, regardless. And look on the bright side...you can see more of your hot dentist.

[bandgsmama]

good luck to you & dd! i don't think it makes you a bad parent, a great deal of it is just genetic. my ds (almost 6) has 0 cavities & my dd right at age 3 had 6 cavities & had to have a root canal (& we did/do brush & use a mouth wash). i felt terrible! i do wish i had went with my gut & had sealants put on the baby molars at her first appointment (but didn't, as it wasn't covered under insurance & the dentist didn't think it was necessary). 6 months later- a mouth full of cavities. i hate that she has a silver molar in the back that will be there until she is 9 or so.

[JoyNChrist]

Don't beat yourself up!

Sure, dental hygiene is super important, but some people are just more cavity-prone than others. Avery has had 3 cavities, and I'm studying in hopes of becoming a dentist and am absolutely fanatical about tooth care. It's just one of this things. The important thing is to take care of it now.

I wouldn't be too worried about the dentist appointment. My scaredy cat DS has done fine for his fillings without any sedation.

[veronica]

I'm just so mad at myself. She's almost 6, loves going to the dentist and we have never had any issues. I tried googling what cavities look like but the pictures I get are so nasty and have almost teethless children so I am super freaked now. I also noticed another molar has the same appearance . It is alongside the side of the tooth, not even the biting surface. She was due for her 6 month in less than a month

how could it have happened so fast?

ETA: "hot-dentist's" wife is on to me. She seems to be my hygenist for all of my visits these days It took 25+ years for her to figure out my childhood crush......

[JoyNChrist]

I have a major crush on our pediatric dentist. I asked DH if I could go do some observation in his clinic and he gave me a "look" lol.

[Aarohismom]

Please be easy on yourself!
DD1 doesn't have a single cavity, DD2 has 3 and one more emerging. Same parenting, same oral care but different results. I think DD2 is more prone to cavities.

[brittone2]

Any chance it could be staining? DS1 had an early cavity on the back of an upper central incisor. Knock on wood he's been okay since then. He has some dark spots on his molars (on the chewing surface) but his previous pedi dentist and our current dentist (post-move) both say it is staining. There is no cavity when they use the probe.

[Pennylane]

Originally Posted by maylips

I don't have any advice, other than to tell you that you're NOT a bad parent. Some kids are more prone to cavities than others, some kids have deeper recesses in their teeth that make bad things pool quicker...there are all types of reasons other than how distracted a parent is.

Good luck! She'll live, regardless. And look on the bright side...you can see more of your hot dentist.

So true! My oldest dd has never had a cavity. My youngest has had 2. The dentist said her molars are so much deeper than either of my other 2 children. So don't beat yourself up too much!

Ann

[veronica]

Originally Posted by brittone2

Any chance it could be staining? DS1 had an early cavity on the back of an upper central incisor. Knock on wood he's been okay since then. He has some dark spots on his molars (on the chewing surface) but his previous pedi dentist and our current dentist (post-move) both say it is staining. There is no cavity when they use the probe.

It's hard to describe but the sides of the molars are just not smooth-there are grooves on there. I wonder if it's from grinding her teeth or if it's always been that way and i never noticed. I keeping finding horrible pics online and then I just want to wake her up and look again-what if it's really progressed?. Thursday can't come soon enough!