When will he start (at least TRY) to bath himself???

[BillK]

So Zach's 5 years old now.

He still has ZERO interest in even TRYING to bath himself.

Currently we bath both of them at the same time. Obviously - we don't expect Ben (3 yo) to bath himself at this point - but he's even seeming to be more interested in at least trying to learn how. Zach - nothing - nada - zip - no interest.

Neither of us want to just say "ok then be dirty if you're not going to try at least" - but on the flipside - we'd like to do just that.

Also - Zach's good about putting his on clothes on but he still refuses to work at learning how to snap his jeans/zip them no matter how much we try. The kid can build the hell out of a lego set but he can't snap his jeans???? Cmon....

What are we doing wrong here - or are we not the only parents with a 5 yo that won't bath themselves???

[elliput]

My demographic is a bit skewed, but DD who is also 5 is just in the past weeks starting to wash herself. If it had not been for her OT asking about it for an evaluation, I probably would have continued to do the washing for her. So a couple weeks ago, I handed her the sponge and said "wash your legs", "wash your arms", etc. DD is getting the hang of it and demonstrating what I am telling her to do helps also especially for under the arms.

Snaps are difficult for DD because of some fine motor delays, but since your DS is a whiz with the legos, that is probably not the case for him. In my opinion, as long as his pants are falling down because they aren't snapped, then other than looking a bit sloppy, it's no big deal.

[GaPeach_in_Ca]

I've never told my 5 year old to bathe himself. He does wash his body, but I wash his hair. I haven't thought of it as a problem.

Just recently we have thought of having him bathe on his own since our two kids are started to get too big to fit in the tub together.

[Green_Tea]

Kindergarten was when I insisted that my oldest play a role in her own bathing routine. We are a 2 baths a week kind of family (unless someone is particularly dirty) and one of those baths is on the weekend. For the weekday bath, she'd take a shower and was responsible for washing her own body and getting her hair wet. Then I'd scrub her hair (she'd come to the back of the tub so the water didn't go everywhere) and then it herself (I inspected). Eventually we graduated to only showers for her, and she washes her own hair now that she's 7. Her younger sibs still take baths in the tub.

Is your son in Kindy yet? Peer pressure will go a long way toward being more self sufficient in the snapping/zipping department, but I agree, he should be able to do it himself. What happens if you just refuse to do it for him?

[zoestargrove]

my older ds started to shower, soap up/shampoo on his own when he was just over 6. In the beginning we did the final soap/shampoo down, then it was just a reminder to make sure he gets certain body parts, etc...now he is on his own.

His younger brother started at the same time - so, he was probably a little past 5 yo.

Bill, just wanted to say that my oldest is usually reticent about trying new tasks. In our family, it's usually his younger brother that does it first and then that is the nudge that gets DS1 to do it too. (this included potty training, dressing oneself, pumping on a swing, riding a bike, showering.)

Kelly

[niccig]

DS is 5 too, he can wash himself, but sometimes I still do it. I still do his hair. He can dress himself and snap the jeans, but that took a little bit of time to get, they're difficult. A friend's son is closer to 6 and he still wants her to dress him. Kids are all different.

You can start to encourage him to be more independent, but if he refuses to do it, then you'll need to. Does it matter if he doesn't do it until his older? It's not like he'll be going off to college and not being able to wash himself or snap his jeans. I do know that K teachers want kids to be able to go to the potty by themselves, so I would make sure of that, and if doesn't want to snap his jeans, don't put him in jeans for school. And I agree with a PP, that he will learn pretty quickly when he's in K and other kids are doing it.

[brittone2]

nak-
DS was 4.

[JBaxter]

Nathan was washing himself in the shower by 5. I ( or DH) squirt the shampoo but he washes his hair I just make sure its rinsed well before he gets out. We rarely "bath"

[hanaum02]

Perhaps this is TMI, but what about wiping? Am I the only mama that still has to wipe her 5 year old after he poops?

Michelle
DS - Another 5 year old Zach that doesn't bathe (or wipe) himself - though he is ok with his pants.
DD 10/08

[crl]

Bathing--it's been off and on that he showers/bathes himself since DS was about 5. I have pretty low standards though so as long as he washes his hair and rinses everything else I'm usually okay with it.

Wiping--he routinely wanted help until he was about 5 1/2 I think. At nearly 7, he still asks for help about once a month. I'd rather help him than have the mess if he really can't get it himself. Of course, I'm the only person who is allowed to help him so I guess he somehow always manages without me at school/when he's home with his dad.

Catherine.