Why are DHs so pathetic when sick?

[wendibird22]

Of course, not you BillK or Codex, you are surely the exception to the rule. But oh my lord you'd think DH was on his death bed every time he gets sick. The girls both had HFM this week and now it appears DH does too (rare for adults to actually get full blown symptoms...lucky us!). Now, I know HFM is miserable. And I'm certain it can't be any fun for him to have a fever and a sore mouth/throat.

Why is it that sick moms are expected to dust them selves off, suck it up, and keep on truckin while the dad's get to roll over and sleep the day away?

The last thing I need to be doing during one of the busiest times of the year for me at work is to take a day off to watch the girls (no daycare FT until next week) because DH can't possibly manage.

[boogiemomz]

Actually, Codex confessed on behalf of all men in a recent thread about "milking it" or something to that affect, exaggerating symptoms to squeeze out all the sympathy he could.

I do think it's a universal thing. When my DH is sick, he expects me to treat him as his mom treated him when he was sick as a kid (doting, waiting on him hand and foot, effusive sympathy, etc). It's a truly pathetic display. When I'M sick, he won't come near me because HE doesn't want to get sick. And needless to say, I am responsible for everything I have to do on any other day.

Sorry you're all having such a rough go. Hope everybody's feeling better soon!

[WatchingThemGrow]

You deserve a medal after this thing cures.

So...most guys are pathetic. Lucky me, but I got the one who gets down right MEAN. He's crazy angry, snippy, hurtful and loud when sick. It's actually scary because he's usually pretty calm, cool, collected and incredibly helpful. When he gets irate about something, I KNOW that's a clue he's coming down with something. We just lock him in the bedroom for a few days and put drinks/food in there. He comes out kind again.

I would LOVE pathetic.

[wendibird22]

The thing is he doesn't want to be doted on. Instead he keeps going in the super pathetic voice, "I'm so sorry. I feel like such a wimp. I wish I could help out with the kids. I can't believe I can't take this." Picture the most dramatic tone you can. Then he quarantines himself in the guest room with the tv on ESPN all day long. Only to come out for a sip of water or to pee. What I want to say is "Yes you are a wimp. Yes you can suck it up just like I do." For example, back in Jan when I caught a stomach virus that landed me in the ER needing fluids, there I was nursing our 7wk old with an IV in my arm and then taking care of both kids that very night. Women get the shaft. I'm pretty sure if the shoe were on the other foot, he'd be at work today and I'd be taking some tylenol and mustering through the day as best I could.

[boogiemomz]

Originally Posted by WatchingThemGrow

You deserve a medal after this thing cures.

So...most guys are pathetic. Lucky me, but I got the one who gets down right MEAN. He's crazy angry, snippy, hurtful and loud when sick. It's actually scary because he's usually pretty calm, cool, collected and incredibly helpful. When he gets irate about something, I KNOW that's a clue he's coming down with something. We just lock him in the bedroom for a few days and put drinks/food in there. He comes out kind again.

I would LOVE pathetic.

Yikes! That does sound scary. Our version of pathetic is very woe-is-me, cranky and irritable the-world-is-conspiring-against-me. Imagine a five year old kicking the dirt because of some everyday disappointment that he perceives as the most egregious injustice ever committed. Puh-leez. Get over it!

OP, do you just keep quiet when he says things like that? Sounds like to me he's fishing for a "Nooooo, it's okay baybeeee, you just lie dooowwwwnn." Those kinds of lines would be met with SILENCE (cue crickets chirping) in my house.

[wendibird22]

Originally Posted by boogiemomz

OP, do you just keep quiet when he says things like that? Sounds like to me he's fishing for a "Nooooo, it's okay baybeeee, you just lie dooowwwwnn." Those kinds of lines would be met with SILENCE (cue crickets chirping) in my house.

Yup, crickets here too. Or I just plainly say that he can't help he's sick. The latest is him saying "I hope you don't get it too. This is the worst." Oh brother. Try giving birth to 2 kids!

[hellokitty]

Because they're babies. My DH is very whiny and pathetic when he is sick. When I am sick, I am really grouchy, b/c I have get to be sick on top of doing all of my normal duties, where DH gets to go upstairs and hideout in bed all day with the tv.