Child Care Options

[muirhejs]

Looking for some advice on what our possible options our for childcare for our first (due May 28).

My income alone doesn't supply enough for us to support our family, so we want my wife to work a few days a week (around 15-20 hours). However, if we have to pay for child care in the traditional sense, this does not make much sense, as her contribution would only amount to $2-3 per hour after child care is paid for.

What options do we have? Any suggestions are appreciated! Some of the ideas we are thinking about include:

Have my wife find a new job that supplies some child care as a benefit (I've heard the YMCA does this to a degree)
Find a neighbor who may be in a similar prediciment- maybe we can watch their child a day or 2 each week and we can watch theirs
Find someone who provides inexpensive childcare in their home


Thanks,

John Muirhead-Gould

Read our blog at http://thenewparents.blogspot.com

[Sillygirl]

Welcome John! We don't have too many men posting (at least that admit it), so I hope you like it here and stick around for a while.

My husband and I both work FT, and we didn't like the child care center option. If you have a neighbor or local friend with a similarly aged child, one great option is to share a nanny. We did this with a friend of mine from work and it was fantastic. We could not have afforded a nanny on our own but this made it affordable. If there's a mom in the neighborhood that needs some hours to get projects done, etc., she may be up for sharing for the limited hours that you wife wants to work.

Oh, and perhaps you could think about mentally subtracting the child care costs from both your salaries, not just your wife's. The child belongs to both of you, right?

[muirhejs]

Have not thought about the nanny option; it is certainly an idea. Thanks for the suggestion.

A couple other thoughts that are out there somewhere on the topic:

Christina (my wife)'s sister is a stay-at-home with 3 young children
Christina's parents are about a 20 minute drive away; they both work though (at least for now)


Not sure if any of this enters the discussion; I'm thinking no, but who knows :38:

[hez]

We found a provider who does in-home day care. For simplicity, we call her our DS's sitter. She's licensed by the local county & has regular inspections by county folks. It has worked out very well for our family in general and with my personal need to have DS in a home environment. A bonus is that the cost is less than half of what it would have been had we chosen a center. Now that DS is 4, he's in a part-time preschool which she is willing to transport him to & from.

If you go that route, you may be able to get referrals from your local county, or whoever in your state licenses day care providers.

[C99]

A couple other thoughts that are out there somewhere on the topic:

Christina (my wife)'s sister is a stay-at-home with 3 young children
Christina's parents are about a 20 minute drive away; they both work though (at least for now)



I am a SAHM with 3 young children. I love my brother and his wife, but there is no way that I would watch an infant child for them gratis. I'm not even sure that I would be willing to take on a niece or nephew for pay at this time. As for the other situation, I would expect to pay my parent (especially one who quits a job to stay with my child) a fair market rate for providing childcare to their grandchild on a long-term basis.

My advice is to wait until your kid gets here and then figure out what you want to do about work and childcare. I worked 20 hours/week when my DS1 was a baby and although I had reasonably priced childcare at the time, it was a huge stress and didn't add much to our family's finances after taking out taxes, childcare, commuting costs, clothing, etc. I stopped when he was about 5 months old.

[bubbaray]

Personally, I wouldn't choose child care based on price -- but I know many if not most people *do* have to do that. I would try to find the best care possible for your child that suits your needs. For me, that means licensed in-home daycare provided by a friend of mine. The curriculum is like that of a preschool, lots of different activities and trips, a variety of ages. The price was inconsequential in making my decision.

Whether you can wait until the baby is here to make your childcare decision depends on the demand for childcare in your area and what waitlists are like for quality care. Where I live, people get their not-yet-born children on waitlists while they are pregnant. That is what I did with both girls to get into my friend's daycare. FWIW, both girls are on the waitlist for our local YMCA daycare (as my backup plan) and DD#1 just got the call that she got in this past September -- 3 years after I put her on the waitlist! I've delayed her entry by a year and am hoping that there will still be space when we want her to go there (closer to school age, and also so that she and DD#2 will be at the same daycare for a while).

You could try the shared childcare with a friend in a similar position, though frankly, I see problems with this -- how reliable is the person? What is their experience caring for children, etc?

As for getting your parents or family to look after your child, I know people who do this. If you can swing it, great. Some parents don't want payment, others see it as their "duty" (often, there are cultural issues at play it seems). THere are always strings, though. If you aren't paying them, do they or you call the parenting shots? Who decides when to potty train? What to feed? Its a lot easier to remain the parent if you paying someone at arms length.

You might want to rethink your family budget if your wife's earning power is only $2-3 over the cost of childcare. Maybe she could work from home or get a job that allows her to work on days that you are home to provide care. Or, find a job at a company that offers on-site or subsidized daycare.

[elephantmeg]

I go the inexpensive home childcare route and it has really worked well for us. Good luck! I really couldn't see paying what centers were charging for childcare!

[LBW]

Is working from home an option for either you or your wife - even just one or two days a week? I've worked from home for the past 2 years and managed most of it without childcare for my now 19-month old son. During the summer I was very busy, so I hired a local college student to watch him and my older DS while I was working in the house. I'm also "creative" about when I work - during naps, in the evenings, and on weekends - so that I can be with my kids and save on childcare costs. It's not easy, but it works for us.

[lvales]

You might check into Parent's day out programs. They are usually less expensive than true day care, and you can choose what days you need. They usually have a limit as to how many days/hours a child can attend based on age - here it's 10-12 hours a week under 3 years old, but you can always enroll in more than one PDO. IT would still be cheaper than Day Care, and around here at least, the PDO programs are really good.

[birdie75]

I guess a lot of this depends on what kind of work your wife does, however, I have a couple of friends that are nurses that work Saturday and Sunday 12 hours each day. That allows then to make about as much as they would working a "normal" schedule without the need for daycare. Is working off hours an option for either of you in your careers? It could help minimize child care costs.

[muirhejs]

Wow thanks everyone for the great suggestions. I think we have 2 ideas that we are thinking of right now:

#1: Cut/stretch/re-work the budget enough so that Christina can just stay at home-- we aren't too far off as it is.

#2: We have a woman in the neighborhood that comes highly recommended from some other parents; she charges $40/day. If my wife really does need to work, this seems pretty reasonable and could provide us with an extra couple hundred dollars a month to help cover any additional expenses.

- John

[kijip]

What about working a different schedule from you? I work essentially M-F and my husband supplements our income and provides health insurance by working weekends. He brings in a lot of extra money + benefits and we don't have to spend anything extra on childcare (we choose to send our son to preschool pt). It is not ideal since we have to get creative for finding family time (in our case it is really more a matter of the great health insurance since I run a small non-profit without medical available and for him to gain professional experience), but it works. If it was just a couple of evening shifts or 1 weekend day it could still bring in more than a week day shirt less childcare for many workers (depends on your wife's skills and earning potential). Or things that you can do with a baby or together or from home...like my parents had a paper route when I was an infant. Also, what does your wife want to do? Work FT, PT, SAH? Her opinion may change drastically after the baby arrives...I found out after my son was born that I needed to be working for me (regardless of money)- and vice versa many moms that plan to return to work find that they simply can't go back to work. Sometimes you won't know until you are living it.

Also, there are a number of ways to cut costs on things like food, entertainment, utility costs etc if you two want one person to stay home full-time. Books like America's Cheapest Family and the Tightwad Gazette have some inspiration in them.

[klwa]

Wow thanks everyone for the great suggestions. I think we have 2 ideas that we are thinking of right now:

#1: Cut/stretch/re-work the budget enough so that Christina can just stay at home-- we aren't too far off as it is.

#2: We have a woman in the neighborhood that comes highly recommended from some other parents; she charges $40/day. If my wife really does need to work, this seems pretty reasonable and could provide us with an extra couple hundred dollars a month to help cover any additional expenses.

- John

Depending on where you are, you may want to look at regular daycare options as well. $40 per day is WELL above what we pay for daycare. ($120 per week for 5 days for an infant.) And that gives you a bit more flexibility. Several people I know who use in-home sitters have real issues scheduling vacation, etc., since the sitter requires certain weeks off, which might not be a week that can work for your family to take off. Also, if the sitter gets sick, that means you have to find alternate daycare anyway. Ours is a church run daycare, and is only closed for major holidays. (Christmas Eve/Day, Good Friday, July 4th.)