My 13 month old won't eat -- anything!

[Eilly]

Hi,

I am pretty desperate. My DS was late to get the hang of the finger food thing. I was spoon feeding him until a few weeks ago. He then seemed to get the hang of it for a week or so and now (for the past 3-4 days) has completely stopped feeding himself no matter what I put in front of him and also refuses to let us spoon feed him. He is very small, not yet 18 lbs, and we are getting really worried about him. I am still nursing him a couple of times a day but I'm not sure how much he is getting. Supplementing with formula of which he consumes about 12 oz/day.

Anyone else had a baby who went on an eating strike? How long did it last? What did you do? I don't see much point in going to the ped. with this problem as I don't see how they could really help here. We try to adpopt a calm and nonchalant attitude when feeding him (or trying to) and not let him see that we are stressed out about it. We also try to make mealtimes fun for him.

All advice or stories of similar experiences very welcome.

[Momof3Labs]

Maybe try feeding him in a different location? Put down a shower curtain and have a picnic in the family room? This was suggested to a friend whose baby developed some serious oral aversions to solids AND bottles (doesn't sound anything like what is going on with your baby, but thought I would mention).

Try different foods, different temperatures, maybe his tastes have changed a little bit!

[Rachels]

We've been there twice. I know how scary it is. Abigail has had medical concerns that have interrupted her eating, but from what I've read, it sounds like toddlers also just sometimes do this. They get busy being toddlers and don't want to slow down for food. Eventually he'll start to eat again as though he never stopped. For us it was about two weeks each time. I found it helpful to break the rules. Forget the highchair, forget the structure. I would set little cups of cheerios on the coffee table, stick a cup of drinkable yogurt next to her while she played, etc. Once in a while she would kind of graze, and I could relax a bit-- at least she'd gotten something in. I tried to make what I offered her as high-calorie as possible. I still do. When I give her drinkable yogurt, I put heavy cream in. If she has bread, it's heavily buttered. There are lots of ideas for high-calorie foods in a thread I posted called "Advice from the Nutritionist" if you need ideas.

Mostly, you're absolutely right not to make it a power struggle. Offer, don't push. If he's not eating because he's distracted, just make food more available to where he actually is. If he's not eating because he's not feeling well, he'll heal and then he'll eat. In the meantime, keep nursing like crazy or offering formula. The main worry is actually dehydration, not calories. Keep an eye on that and hang in there! It will pass.

-Rachel
Mom to Abigail Rose
5/18/02

[Eilly]

Thanks for the advice. I'm about to try feeding him breakfast in the family room, by the window with a view out onto a busy street. Fingers crossed! Also printed out the list of high-calorie foods, very useful. Thanks for the advice about dehydration too. I was in the process of trying to wean him -- just cut down from three feeds a day to two. (actually this change coincided with his eating strike -- we replaced usual 6am nurse with a bottle, which he does take, from his dad. This is the only bottle he really takes during the day). Maybe I should forget about weaning for now and just nurse him often?

[Eilly]

Well, the highchair in the family room didn't work this morning alas! Did manage to shovel half a tub of yoghurt into him while he was playing with a truck though. Maybe this is the way to go? Or do you think if I start feeding him out of the highchair this will become problematic later? Thanks.

[nigele]

When my DS was 13 months old, he did the same thing. He was about 18 pounds at the time. He also never really caught on to finger foods that well. During this period, he would only eat goldfish, crackers and breastmilk. I started putting his highchair on the lowest setting so he could stand at it. I would put a selection of different foods on the tray throughout the day and let him graze. He didn't eat all that much but at least it was a start. He is eating somewhat better now and will eat spoon foods if I let him dip into the bowl while feeding him. He wants control and giving him some has really helped. He's still very picky but these things have helped.

Just as Rachel, I give him high calorie foods and load up the butter and cream on everything I can.

Good luck!

[flagger]

Unless there is a medical condition, the human body will not allow itself to starve or dehydrate. It will go into self-survival mode and force the hunger pains on him.

He is asserting his independence as he knows it will get a reaction out of you.

Offer the food for a set amount of time and put it away. His pangs of hunger will overcome his test of wills in no time flat.

[Tondi G]

He could be getting his molars a lot of 1 year olds go through strikes when they are cutting molars! Just keep offering him the food and he'll eat what he wants!!!! Good luck... this too shall pass!

~Tondi and Mason 7/8/01