I am flipping out!

[farsk]

Hello Everyone!

Today is my first day back to work (I've cried all day so far), and just completed my first pumping session. I kept telling myself tht if I got four ounces, everything would be fine (I usually get 6 to 7 oz first thing in the morning after feeding DD). I ONLY GOT THREE OUNCES!!!!! So, of course in the fatalistic view that I am now taking of the world...Ellen will starve to death because I can't pump enough!

One bright spot, though....I just called day care who told me that she took all but one oz. of her four oz. bottle.

Am I being paranoid?

-Shannon (aka The Crying Fool)
Mom to Ellen 7/23/2003

[alkagift]

DON'T STRESS! It's ok, you will recover--you'll be back to your old pumping self soon, but don't worry about today. Today is awful, and maybe this whole week will be awful--give yourself permission to feel bad if you need to, or to feel good when you want to. You love Ellen and she loves you--that's all that matters and you WILL feel better!

The pumping will improve. Did you add a pumping session in to your day? It does make a difference in feeling confident that you'll have plenty.

Allison
Mom to Matthew Clayton, 5/19/03

[momma_boo]

Hang in there, Shannon! Don't stress about the milk. Ellen will NOT starve. I have been back to work for three months now and have never pumped enough at work to provide for all the milk she needs during the day. But I am able to meet her needs with the milk that I pump in the morning before work (I only feed her one side and pump the other side) and extra pumping when I get home from work and during the weekend. You are doing great. It's a great sign that Ellen is eating most of her bottle at daycare.
Once you get into a routine of pumping at work and get used to being at work, you'll do fine. Make sure to drink tons of water during the day and it's been said on the boards that oatmeal helps (even oatmeal cookies).

[stillplayswithbarbies]

Don't worry, this is just one pumping session. Look at your total for the day, not just one session. Three ounces is great!!

To put it in perspective, my daughter is 7 months old, this is the second baby I have pumped for, (I am an experienced pumper) and I only got three ounces in my first session this morning at work. That is usual for my morning session.

Are you pumping in the morning at home before you go to work? That works out well for me. In fact, I get up early and pump both sides and get 6 to 8 ounces, and then I clean up the pump, pack it up for work, and then wake up Logan to eat. The breasts keep making milk, so she gets enough even though I have just pumped.

Also, work on building up a freezer stash. Pump on the weekends and put it in the freezer. You can be more relaxed when you know you have a reserve in the freezer. I started before I went back to work, pumping every morning and putting it in the freezer. Now I don't pump on the weekends anymore.

Hang in there, it gets easier.

...Karen
Jacob Nathaniel Feb 91
Logan Elizabeth Mar 03

[peanut4us]

Shannon,

First thing's first. Just relax. You're pumping will be more productive if you can relax. I just lean back in the chair and close my eyes, let my head drop back, and think of any good happy moment with Sara from the morning. I picture her smiling at me, sticking her bum in the air (too cute), her looking around for me and finding me and smiling at me. Then I look down at the pump and it's almost over. Part of the trick with me anyway is not looking at the pump the whole time. It's like watching a seed sprout, vrey slow and very discouraging. But if I look away or close my eyes for a while, I'm surprised at how much is in there.

As far as how much you pumped, this am at work, I pumped 6.5 ounces. I'm going to pump in a minute, and I'm thinking, maybe 4. But sara didn't eat well before work. So I was high. When sara eats well in the am, I try to get 3 pumping sessions in because they will usually be only between 3-4 ounces. I was just writing someone else about this very thing. She's unpredicable. Some days she doesn't eat well all day (maybe 6-8 ounces of EBM); some days she's my little piggy and will eat 15 ounces. I seem to average out over the week and keep up with her. Occasionally, we will pull out of the freezer stash. If you don't have one, build one. It's peace of mind.

Last word, this week is going to stink. Just accept that. You are probably not going to be happy, and you are probably not going to be as productive as usual (work-wise or pumping!). That's OK. Just hang in there. It does get better, easier. We're here for you!

[KGoes]

This, too, shall get better. This is my third week back to work and I am light years from where I started on day 1. I felt like turning in my resignation after the first day. . . . I spent the rest of the first week composing search warrants in my head should these prove necessary to explore all of my unfounded paranoid concerns about daycare. I was like this, and I go over to BF her for lunch every day!
If she is taking that much from a bottle, all is well. DD still won't take a whole bottle at one time at daycare, although she will at home, in my office - just about anywhere else it seems.
The pumping will improve as well. It took a few days, but my body adjusted to the new schedule. I have found that I tend to get the same number of ounces throughout the day even if the amounts in the individual sessions differ. Calm and quiet are keys to my pumping supply - that any plenty of water. I also have pictures of DD in a small album that fits in my purse - a gift from another working mom - that I flip through whenever I feel low.
Other things that have helped me cope are arranging my schedule so that I can leave early one day a week - I just "kidnap" DD and we play hookey together. After all, I can read boring documents while feeding her at home. The other sanity preserving measure that I take is letting unimportant things go at home. DH was more likely to get a hot meal while I was on maternity leave than he is now. I want to spend time playing with DD and holding her because I think it's important to stimulate and cuddle her - two things that I worry she does not get enough of at daycare. Actually, DH has been really supportive, since he does not want me to quit!
Kelley
Mom to Grace, born 7/30/03

[bigsis]

I'm sure the stress you're feeling is not good for your milk supply. It will get better the next few days. Meanwhile, try to pump at home too. HUGS!! I'm going back to work in 2 weeks and I can't imagine what you're going through. My dd won't even take the bottle! Talk about being a worry-freak! Hope you feel better soon!