Baby sleeping, mommy not sleeping!

[megsmom]

I hope this isn't a sign of bad things to come. I had bad PPD last time with Meg and wasn't able to sleep making me a nervous wreck. I also ended up weaning early because I was so nuts. Last night I slept 3 hrs and have been up since 2 am. My little ones slept well last night too. I woke Brian twice to feed since I was up anyway thinking if I went to sleep then I wouldn't have to awaken just after I drifted off. Just when I had him back to bed at 6 or so, my 2 year old woke up. I was in tears by this point, tired and afraid that I wasn't going to make it through the day.

Though I am not traditionally a good napper, I tried to take one today since both my kids are sleeping, but alas I lay there and don't feel sleepy. If I catch myself drifting off, I sort of jolt awake and drift into some sort of overdrive. I did lay down though for an hour and tell myself that's doing some kind of good.

I've been worried about my milk supply some, but Brian keeps finding milk, though it doesn't seem plentiful. I've lost track of how my wets and dirty diapers we've had and how much I've fed him. Usually after a stretch of sleep I'm engorged and my supply is great for that day. When I don't sleep there's definitely not as much there. He's nursing a lot today (seems to have a tummyache too) with no long stretches between nursing except for now. Usually he nurses a long time with lots of milk coming down and afterward seems relaxed and sleepy, but today that's not the case. He was very fussy this morning until my husband gave him a bottle after I nursed and he was just rooting, smacking his lips and getting frantic. I'm actually relieved he took the bottle since he completely rejected his pacifier and I need him to take a bottle to go back to work.

My 2 year old is also having some clinginess issues and last night was such a pill I found myself yelling at her and being almost rough with her. I feel so bad about that but after dealing with her and my baby crying for hours I was fried. She herself was not sleeping earlier this week and was a little sick. It's just such an adjustment with two who seem to both need you at the same time. The guilt is definitely there with two because you just can't do it all for them, not to mention yourself, your husband, your house...ugh.

Anyway, sorry for the long ramble. You can probably tell I'm functioning on fumes here. Thanks for listening. Wish us good sleep vibes tonight.

Jen
mom to Meghan 7/13/01
and Brian 11/11/03

[lizajane]

i am so sorry that you are having such a hard time right now. not being able to sleep when you have time to sleep is the WORST.

a friend had some major insomnia recently, and she saw a dr who was also a lactation "expert." (i don't think she worked as a consultant, but she help to found a nursing mothers group, etc.) she said that you CAN take tylenol PM while nursing. AND you can take some prescription sleep aids, too. please call your Dr. and ask for some help!

[barbarhow]

Jen-I so feel for you. There is nothing to make you feel worse than lack of sleep. Unfortunately with us bfing moms it becomes such a vicious cycle-no sleep-decreased supply which makes you worry even more which increases stress and makes insomnia worse. UGH. I have so been there. Your doctor could prescribe you some Ambien which is a mild sleeping pill-very short acting and it can be used by lactating moms. I have resorted to taking it on a few occasions since Jack was born. Please call your OB tomorrow (Or today if you have a pharmacy available) You deserve and need a good nights sleep. Also if you are at all concerned about a recurrence of PPD please talk to your doctor- It may just be that you are focusing on the sleep but it would be a good thing to stay on top of it.
Barbara-mom to Jack 3/27/03

[Momof3Labs]

Jen, you need some help! You can't do it all with a newborn and a toddler, even though it is our nature as mommies to expect to be able to do it all. Do you have a friend or family member who can help you out a little? Or even a neighborhood teenager who wants to pick up a few bucks after school a few days a week. Can your DH take a day here and there off of work to help give you a break?

Brian might be going through his three week growth spurt, in which case your best bet is to keep nursing through it so that your supply increases and keeps up with his future needs.

And you need to get enough sleep so that your can keep your supply up - I second the recommendation of Tylenol PM. Or even Benadryl (Tylenol PM is basically Benadryl + Tylenol).

Hang in there, mama, and ask someone to help - you need it!!

[egoldber]

Jen, I don't know if you'vew read this stuff (where do we find the time?), but the info at kellymom.com is FANTASTIC!

http://www.kellymom.com/bf/index.html

If you are concerned about supply (but as long as he continues to gain there's no real need to worry), you can take fenugreek. If you need me to bring you some, I would be HAPPY to!! Also drink lots of water. I'd also be happy to come over and entertain Meg for awhile if you need a break! I'm sure Sarah would love a playdate! :)

[jojo2324]

Jen, I hope that things are better for you this time around. If you are concerned about PPD, I would try to see a doctor before it IS a problem...Try to nip it in the bud, I guess.

And definitely try to get some help. It's a lot to go through...You shouldn't have to go it alone! I think Lori is right too, that Brian is hitting his three-week growth spurt. And DO try to nap, and if not that, at least rest, hard as it may be. And DON'T worry about your house, please! That's the least of your worries. And forgive me for saying this, but you can let your hubby slide a little bit right now too. Focus on you and the kiddos.

I really hope things start looking up. Let us know how you're doing, big hugs to you! :)

[sntm]

jen,

hope things are better for you. i would definitely talk with somebody -- don't know what symptoms you had with PPD, but insomnia can be a definite sign of depression. benadryl works and is safe for BFing (though have heard anecdotally that it can decrease milk supply somewhat) and there are lots of other sleep aids a doc can give you, but just make sure you look to see if there is an underlying cause for your insomnia. i get insomnia a lot, so i can empathize. hugs hugs hugs

shannon
not-even-pregnant-yet-overachiever
trying-to-conceive :)
PREGNANT! EDD 6/9/03
mama to Jack 6/6/03

[megsmom]

I never updated anyone on how I ended up doing. My mom remembered that I used to have reactions to food dye where I would act like I was on amphetamines and then crash. That is basically how I felt so I started looking for things that I was eating that weren't normally there. My MIL went to the grocery store before she left and instead of buying normal turkey or ham lunchmeat, she bought bolonga (I never buy this stuff, yuck). Well, anyway it was what I had for a sandwich for a few days since it was all we had that was quick to grab. After I quit eating that junk, NO MORE SLEEPING PROBLEMS.

I nursed Brian through it the whole time and basically my supply ended up being fine. In fact he gained a pound in 2 weeks and is now probably 11 pounds. He poops and pees so much it's almost disruptive. :) Throughout this time my DH and DD got colds but Bri and I managed to elude them despite all the physical and emotional stress. And I did not drive our new Honda van off the road as I feared. :)

I had another less than ideal day with the kids since Meg has another cold(!) and Brian refused to nap for longer than 15 minutes until 2 pm. Thank God I got them both down for the afternoon so I could reclain some sanity and brush my teeth. The night before Meg was coughing so bad she ended up gagging and puking in the bed. After all the sheets changing, calming, bathing and feeding Brian again I got to bed around midnight. He was up 3 times before 6. At least I managed to crash all the times in between. I haven't been anywhere in 3 days, and Meg snotting all over and clingy today with her testing my patience at every interval and Brian fussing, it was a test of nerves. I did not feel like a good mother at all today since it seems I barely met everyone's needs. I did break down on the phone with my mom tonight but feel okay now since all is quiet.

I know I don't have it bad compared to most so will try and count my blessings. Both my kids are relatively healthy, cute and calm for the most part and sleep well most nights and afternoons. I am managing to successfully breastfeed despite the 3 ring circus here. For that I must be grateful and know that tomorrow is another day.

Goodnight all. Sleep well (I hope).

Jen
mom to Meghan 7/13/01
and Brian 11/11/03

[sntm]

jen,
glad one of the problems got solved! sounds like your house i s crazy but you are certainly not alone in that. if they go down for a nap today, give yourself a long soak in a bubble bath.

shannon
not-even-pregnant-yet-overachiever
trying-to-conceive :)
PREGNANT! EDD 6/9/03
mama to Jack 6/6/03