After an HOUR of breastfeeding HAD to give Sydney a bottle

[TraciG]

So unhappy, If I am screwing up my milk supply I will be even more unhappy but I had no choice, she was DEFINITELY hungry, not just wanting to suck, now that she had 3 oz of formula she is like a different baby, my husband thinks it's ok because she nursed for an hour so my supply shouldn't get affected, i dont know, this happened last night too, for hours I was nursing then finallly my husband gave her formula & she ate it all, I was so angry for some reason, she always falls asleep sucking/nursing & I told my husband he could hold her in bed, he asked why I'm angry with her, isn't that ridiculous, I am just so disappointed with myself, I called the LC left a message, she hasn't called back, soit seems I am breastfeeding then giving a bottle after in the evenings when she seems to never be satisfied.


I was hoping to breastfeed for 1 year, doesn't seem that is going to happen now :(

[deborah_r]

I have no experience with supplementing so I don't know how to help, but just wanted to say I feel for you. And there were definitely times early on when I was frustrated and felt angry with my son, and DH had to take him for a while. It's a lot of work to breastfeed and you're probably sleep-deprived too and it's just so much PRESSURE! I think it's pretty normal to feel that way...just make sure if you are alone with her and you feel angry to set her down in her crib and walk away for awhile.

Do you feel your milk letting down when she breastfeeds?

[stillplayswithbarbies]

A lactation consultant will be able to evaluate her latch and whether she is sucking well.

You'll have peace of mind once you get some support in person.

...Karen
Jacob Nathaniel Feb 91
Logan Elizabeth Mar 03

[chlobo]

Hi Traci,

I'm in the same boat. My baby (now 9 weeks) nurses forever and then still seems like she could nurse longer.

My husband and I decided to try a new nightime ritual. Maybe it will help you. In order ot ensure that she's getting a large serving just before bed my husband gives her a bottle of EBM. He makes sure she eats the whole thing (between 4 & 5 oz). She usually seems satisfied after that and sleeps for like 4 hours before waking to nurse at night.

Perhaps something like that can work for you as well. Have you tried pumping?

[stillplayswithbarbies]

I just had a thought. Have you read the book "Child of Mine, Feeding With Love and Good Sense" by Ellyn Satter? The first part of it deals with breast feeding, and may help you to understand how a baby eats and what to do about feeding her.

She talks about how to follow the baby's lead about eating, rather than force her to eat, etc.

I think it would be really helpful to you and your husband to read it. And for the last poster too. It's important to get the feeding relationship off to a good start right from the beginning, so that feeding solids later will be easier too.

...Karen
Jacob Nathaniel Feb 91
Logan Elizabeth Mar 03

[drsweetie]

>she always falls asleep
>sucking/nursing

Traci, are you sure that Sydney's actually hungry when she cries? I can't remember how old Sydney is, but I remember that when Laura was a couple of months old we went through this time where Laura would fuss, so I would nurse her, and then she'd conk out during a feeding. After several weeks of going nuts and nursing every 1.5-2 hours, we finally figured out that her "I'm hungry" cry and her "I need a nap" cry looked and sounded almost identical, and that I had been misreading the "tired" cry and thinking that it meant "hungry". The reason why Laura was falling asleep during feedings was that she was tired, not hungry.

We learned that the main difference was the timing -- "tired" occurred roughly 2 hours after a meal, "hungry" every 3 -- and the persistence; if at the 2-hour mark we put fussy Laura in her crib, she'd settle down to sleep. If she were truly hungry, she didn't settle down, and then I knew to feed her. I'm definitely not suggesting that you withhold food from Sydney, but see if maybe the same thing we experienced is happening to you guys. It made our lives a lot easier when we figured this out. Good luck!

Ellen
Mom to Laura 6/9/03

[chlobo]

Ellen,

Thanks so much for posting this. This is what happened to me and I'm so sleep deprived its taken me a while to figure out that is what's going on. I felt like I was constantly nursing but Isabella was "snick snacking" and fiddling around. Mind you I *just* figured this out so I'm not sure how our new routine will work out but we're giving it a try. We're hopeful she'll less often but take in more and also get more rest. She's kind of a cranky baby and I think its because we misdiagnosed her cries and havne't been putting her down to sleep enough.

Why don't these things come with manuals, anyhow?

[TraciG]

when do I learn what her cries mean, will I ever ? I will look into the book Child Of Mine, the LC still hasn't caleld back, wonder if she's away or because I saw her about 1 month ago she wont call back, not sure. We do know Sydney has a great latch, no problem there,just the last few days as soon as I go to burp her she cries like she cant even stand a little break in eating & she moans as she's eating only sometimes, like once or twice a day, I gave her the bottle after nursing yesterday but later on she was fine. I dont think I feel the milk letdoown when Sydney is eating, I mostly feel it when I go a long time with nursing.

Thanks for the responses

[drsweetie]

Traci, I don't think it's possible to predict 100% of the time what a baby's cries mean -- but over time you'll notice certain patterns that you can use to help you figure out what's most likely going on. Every baby's different, but for us life became a lot easier when we learned two things about Laura:

1) Fuss 2 hours after meal = nap time
Fuss 3 hours after meal = meal time

2) Suck thumb + rub head + crying increases after put in crib = meal
time
Suck thumb + rub head + goes to sleep after put in crib = nap time

Again, every baby's different. These "rules" work for Laura, because she's fairly predictable about meals, but they won't necessarily work for Sydney. I know Laura was at least 2 months old before we came to this conclusion, and we just kind of happened on it by accident. Laura still cries sometimes if I sit her up to burp her during a feeding; it might be a trapped air bubble, or it may be because she really wants to nap but can't resist the temptation to nurse.

I think talking to the LC is a great idea. Something else you might want to try, if you're not already doing this, is keeping a log: are there certain behaviors Sydney exhibits (like sucking her thumb) that indicate she's truly hungry and not something else? Are there certain times of the day that she seems to want to nap? I don't believe that babies should be rigidly scheduled, but if you can identify predictable behaviors, rhythms, or patterns you will all be a lot happier. It might take a few days to do this.

Hang in there!

Ellen
Mom to Laura 6/9/03

[TraciG]

I'm dying for Sydney to suck her thumb, would be nice when we're out or with family since now i'm her only pacifier !!!!!!!