Anybody here over 40 TTC?

[Community Chest]

I am starting to wonder if I am doing the right thing.

I recently changed docs. I'm not too wild about this dude, either. After the exam, I mentioned we were TTC.

He looked at me, paused for 10 seconds, kind of made a face and then finally said, "Too late." He paused. "If you are early 40s, you have a chance. After that, you can't do it without chemical enhancement.

"When was your birthday?" I told him. "Oh. You're almost 45 and a half."

Uh...not for several more months.

Another gripe: I am not happy with a great many of conception-oriented websites. I feel like bleep and that I am pretty much left out of the picture in them; seems like the oldest woman they have that's TTC is maybe 35 max, let alone anyone at all over 40.

This doc is sending us off to an RE. Gee; I wonder if this practitioner will also think we are wasting our time.

[Momof3Labs]

I'd highly recommend that you go to www.inciid.org. It is an infertility website, but there are message boards with support for people in all different situations who are ttc. In fact, I know that there were at least two women who were 45 on our Due in October board. There is a specific board for women over 40 who are ttc, so you can go straight there and bypass all the young 'uns.

You'll also probably have better luck with an RE than an OB - if you don't, look for a new RE!

Hope this helps!

Lori & Colin 9/28/02

[Annette_C]

Hi, I'm sorry you're going through this. And please tell your doctor that he's WRONG!!! At 44 I conceived and gave birth to a 9 lb 4 oz baby girl with no problems whatsover!
This is my second marriage (my first husband died young) and I have 2 older children (in their 20's!).
This pregnancy was a total surprise but turned out well because my new husband had never been married nor had any kids.
So, please don't give up. I know women in their late 40's that have had children.
Good luck!
Annette
SAHM to Sabrina 6/24/02

[bunnisa]

Gosh, I'm sooooo sorry that he treated you that way! Switch docs immediately! :)

A website I use that may be exactly what you're looking for is www.babymed.com . Go to "Community" and "Discussion" and see all the threads. They have age-specific and infertility-specific message boards, as well as many others. I have found the women on the site to be EXTREMELY encouraging and supportive, and I think you will, too.

I wish you the best in finding a great OB/RE, ands end many happy baby thoughts to you... it's NOT too late! (I have a friend of the family who's 52, has a 2 yr old, and is pregnant with twins!)

Warm thoughts,

Bethany

[tinwhistle]

I'm no expert on this issue, but I did hear that my obstetrician here in New York City just had a patient in her 50s who had a successful pregnancy and delivery. I believe she may even have been in her late 50s. So I would take heart and keep hunting for a doctor who's as excited as you are for you to have a baby. Good luck!