Oversized babies in "bucket" carseats!!!!

[toomanystrollers]

I had a customer with her daughter and grandson stop in to our facility yesterday. The grandson, 2 days older than Neve, and in my guesstimate - close to 24 lbs. was strapped into a bucket carseat. He was absolutely overstuffed into it. His feet were dangling way over the end. He couldn't even wear a coat (mid 30's out), so he had a blanket jammed in on top of him.

So before I jumped to any conclusions, I casually walked out to the parking lot and past their vehicle. Sure enough, the infant seat base was in use - ARGH!!!!!

So my co-worker and I hatched a plan. We just started to mention how "big" he was. Then I mentioned "Neve" along with "You're not using that for him as a carseat?????"

Mom's response: "Ya - it's just soooooo convient". Yes, so convient for her to park her son on the cold tile floor and leave him totally alone and wonder why he was fussing. I then became the "baby entertainer" and parked him next to me on my desk.

So I gave her a mini lecture - how the seats are not designed and not safe for very large babies. Her mother agreed :)

I see this all the time and it drives me NUTS!!!!!!!!!!!

[caleymama]

I do too and ITA. I keep telling myself that the parents must just use it as a carrier after taking the baby out of the larger carseat. Yeah, right. DD outgrew her infant carseat lengthwise at 4 months and while it wasn't as convenient, I never gave another thought to the switch.

[Imperia]

For a minute I thought you were going to call it a "baby container" hehehe.

I use the infant seat as a carrier sometimes, but I also use my sling. The thing that annoys me to no end is that people look at me ascance with my sling, but they don't bat an eyelash with the carrier.
I have lopst count of how manny people have said, "Ohhhhhhh aren't you afraid she is going to falll out?" NO! I'm not, now go away. When I brought Maddy into my OB's office for my six week check up in her infant carrier (hard to use a sling while in stirrups I figured
:P ) One of the nurses comment on how cute they look in their little "buckets". I wanted to say I thought she was cuter next to me in her sling where strangers didn't keep reaching out to touch her face. I mean, yes it's convienant I guess, but I prefer having my baby next to me in the sling or in my arms.

Imperia

[bluej]

I don't see what's convenient about using a bucket carseat to lug around a 24lb baby. I found it heavy and awkward to carry when Ryden was only 16 lbs! Hmmm, maybe that says more about my arm strength than anything else! Anyway, this also annoys the everliving crap out of me as well.

[Rachels]

Good for you for speaking up! I hate seeing that, too!

-Rachel
Mom to Abigail Rose
5/18/02

[NEVE and TRISTAN]

"Ya- I am absolutely terrified he is going to fall out that's why I am caring him around in it..."....
...people amaze me at times!!!

I am a lot more afraid of those car seats used to carry babies around, I see them on top of cars...in the parking lot on the GROUND....in an empty space where another car could just pull on in there and not see them...Parents carrying them so far off tot he side that I'm afriad a car in the parking lot will run by and hit the baby...
Not knocking them...just the way babies have been handled in them...

And folks who have the arguement abotu letting a sleepy baby sleep...Tristan always stays asleep if he is in the Convertible and I remove him!!!!


Neve
http://home.nc.rr.com/ourbabytristan
AKA "mama2be"-forgot password
and Baby Boy Tristan born @UNC
Feb 25, 2003
Brother to 3 pups "gees" and 2 kitties

[egoldber]

I think part of it is just the fear of moving into that convertible seat! I know I was so awkward and hestiant about using the RA after the Snugride, but in a couple weeks I was honestly grateful to not have to lug the thing around anymore!

But my best IRL friend did this with her little girl and it drove me CRAZY!!! And she KNEW better and did it anyway! Argh!!!

[JenCA]

I agree...we kept DD in her Snugride for probably a couple of weeks longer than she should have been, simply because we were terrified of moving her into the Roundabout--but she was nowhere near 24lbs!! There is absolutely NOTHING convenient about lugging around a baby that heavy in a carrier like that--not to mention how incredibly unsafe it is for the child. Ugh.

[deborah_r]

When I was pregnant and researching carseats, I was talking to my boss about all the options out there and how confusing it was, what with all the travel systems and everything. She has 2 children who are grown, and she was just disgusted by those infant carseat/travel systems, because she said it was set up so you hardly have to hold your baby. In the carseat, carry to the car, lock em in, drive, get to destination, click the seat out, carry baby around, set baby down, etc. I told her I thought it would be good so I wouldn't wake him if he was sleeping, but she still thought they were bad. I thought she was kind of crazy.

I somewhat agree with her now, because I know I tried to make an effort to carry him and hold him as much as possible, but that carseat let me be too lazy sometimes, and I think we were guilty of just lugging him around sometimes. I used to get mad at DH because we would be somewhere and I would want to take him out and hold him, and DH would be like "Oh, it's such a hassle to take him out and strap him back in, blah, blah." I would just give him "the look" and he would back off - I don't think it's that he didn't care about the baby (of course) it's just he's very focused on our "mission" when we are out, and getting it done, and getting home. Now, we didn't go out all that much, and he got held plenty at home, but I just think it's something that can be abused in the wrong hands. Convenience is one thing, but having babies spending 75% of their day in these seats is bad. And then it's so convenient that I bet a lot of people exceed the limits on it because they don't want to lose the convenience.

I guess like all the baby equipment, it's a matter of how you use it. If a parent doesn't have common sense, there is not much you can do. Good for you for pointing it out to them - I would have been afraid to, I think!

[HoneymoonBaby]

I have a hard time seeing ANY baby in those bucket carseats. We're going to use a Roundabout from day one with our little guy. I just know the temptation to be lazy and leave him in the seat would be too great if I had an infant carrier. I know there's tons of moms who DON'T abuse the convenience of the infant seat, but I think an awful lot of them do.

[JenCA]

I do have to say that those infant carseats are VERY convenient when your baby is a newborn. It made grocery shopping a piece of cake before DD was big enough to sit in the cart seat (I had a Bjorn but didn't use it because my daughter hated it), and when she would fall asleep in the car, we could move her into the house without waking her up and let her finish her nap. It was especially convenient when we were battling colic and had to take DD out for drives at 3am to try to get her to stop screaming and fall asleep! :) Also--I was told by the store where we bought our RB that they don't really recommend the RB for babies under 15lbs because there is no head/neck support (although you can buy a neck halo to use in the RB, I believe). Anyway--I am not trying to dissuade you, I just wanted to point out that there are definitely benefits to this type of carseat.

[BethS]

Good for you for saying something! I, too, see this all the time and it has become my new pet peeve. It's just so dangerous.

Jack outgrew his Snugride at 2 months but we still keep it in the truck for when we're in restaurants, etc and use it as a baby seat. I won't even carry him around in it simply because at 17 1/2 lbs it's too awkward. He loves his marathon and I love that it will last us a while. :)

[houseof3boys]

Good for you on giving her the lecture. I would have gone nuts on her.

Go get em safety advocate. It is crazy the things that parents do that are soooooo unsafe.

[Judegirl]

First-time Mom-to-be alert....what's a "bucket" carseat?? An infant seat? (Like the SnugRide?)

*scratching my head and heading for Google...*

Thanks,
Jude

[papal]

Pam,
I commend you in telling off that woman. A baby that large will certainly be uncomfortable in a car-seat.

But i disagree that a car-seat for smaller babies is completely inappropriate.

Let me preface this by saying that Leela is 10.5 pounds, 22.5 inches and almost 5 months old. We just removed the car-seat adapter on our MBUS and put the hammock seat back in. It certainly was very convenient to snap her seat into the stroller, especially when she fell asleep. If you have ever woken a sleeping Leela, you will know her demeanour is not exactly pleasant. So I am guilty of doing that. And new and tired moms are allowed their small conveniences as long as it not at the expense of the baby's well being.

She does not sleep when slinged and besides that is not easy on my back for long stretches of time.

Also, the two times that we went out to eat <shudder> with her, she was parked in her car-seat at the table. What other choice did i have? If i held her, how could i eat? And the stroller is usually a PITA to take into a restaurant, especially the ones near where we live (no handicap access, small entryway etc).

What I am trying to say is that, while a baby who is uncomfortable certainly has NO place in an infant car-seat, a baby who is tiny and fits in it without any problems is fine, imo.

I don't think car seats should be used in place of bouncy chairs at home but a couple of hours in it will not do any harm.
I am starting to ramble but I hope you got the gist of what i am trying to say! :)
Thanks for listening.

[deborah_r]

Yes, it is an informal name for the snugride-type seats. Infant seats with carrying handels = "bucket baby" !

[mharling]

Pam -
Good for you for not jumping to conclusions! But, your 'test' of walking past the car may not have been accurate as evidenced by the baby in a bucket seat I saw riding on the lap of the front seat passenger. GRRR!!! Are these people insane???

For the record, we used an infant seat and LOVED it. But we also moved Lane to his convertible seat when appropriate.

Mary
Lane 4/6/03

[brubeck]

> We're going to use a Roundabout from day one with our little guy.

Good for you! We did this with both of our babies. When we needed to 'carry them around' we used the Baby Bjorn (started both kids at 2 weeks old). We also saved ourselves the expense of another carseat that they both would have outgrown before 6 months old. Both kids fit just fine in the RA coming home from the hospital as 7 pound newborns.

[Melanie]

I think our neighbors have a baby bucket forward facing for their toddler. =(

I was also afraid to make the switch b/c of the sleep issue (Ds is a total car "baby" - still!) but we found out quickly just how to get him out that he stays asleep and move him to his bed.

I was bucket-user, but it was so dang heavy even before Ds hit the 20 lbs mark (I think I moved him for height before weight anyway). I liked it when shopping b/c I knew it was clean as opposed to carts (if only I'd found the wonderful world of WAHM cart-covers then). I also slinged him until he stopped liking it. Personally, I liked a good balance of the two. Sometimes I wanted him to stay comfy in his bucket and the absolute most convenient part of it was that I didn't have to work around a nap schedule b/c it was his favorite napping place. I could still be out and about and not mess up his naps whereas after we made the switch it was another parenting adjustment to work my day around the naps.

I have to agree that it saddens me greatly when I see people who seem to be resistant to removing their baby from the bucket at all costs (i.e. they're screaming and yet they still don't pick them up!), or just ignore them in it.

CPS techs, are they still saying that infant seats are better for infants? We were originally going to go with just a convertible, but then that Consumer Reports issue came out right around then...

[deborah_r]

Rashmi,

I know (as we all do) that you are a great mom, and I didn't mean to offend you with my rant on people abusing the convenience of car seats. I just see a lot of people that I get a bad feeling about, like Melanie mentioned below, you know the baby's crying and fussing and they won't take them out of the darn seat! I know I am only seeing these people when they are out, so I shouldn't judge them as I do not know what they do when they are home, and most people are home much more than they are out.

We definitely used the car seat when we would go out to eat, but like you, we didn't do it much. But if people go out to eat all the time, there's the baby sitting in that bucket all night! If DS was awake, we would take him out and pass him back and forth holding him and playing with him, until the food got there. We still do this now, then put him in the high chair when food comes, that way he doesn't get bored until we are done eating (usually!)

I just worry about all of these gadgets we have for babies to be plopped in, because I think if a parent is not careful they start to get used to having the baby confined so they can do their own thing, when maybe they could be holding their babies a little more. When babies are awake they should be able to move their arms and legs about freely as much as possible, and that's hard to do in the infant seat.

With the convertible carseat now, unless I have to carry a bunch of things out of the car, I truly enjoy getting him out of the seat and giving him a big kiss and snuggling all the way into the house, so I don't miss the infant seat at all!

[Melanie]

>I just worry about all of these gadgets we have for babies to
>be plopped in, because I think if a parent is not careful they
>start to get used to having the baby confined so they can do
>their own thing, when maybe they could be holding their babies
>a little more. When babies are awake they should be able to
>move their arms and legs about freely as much as possible, and
>that's hard to do in the infant seat.

I hear you! Between the bouncer, the swing, the bucket, the exersaucer, the jolly-jump-up, etc. etc. they're really getting developmentally delayed. I remember in our infant parent class the teacher remarking that "playpens" seem to be a last resort for parents now, but the one thing they had going for them was at least the babies could move freely. That really stuck with me and we tried to keep Ds out of them as much as we could. Of course he was in our arms so much yet still developed fine. =)

[papal]

Deborah! I did not get offended by your comments at all sweetie!!
I just wanted to show the other side of the coin also.. that using the carseat is sometimes a necessary convenience. And I totally hear you on overusing gadgets and not holding the baby enough. I feel bad when we put dd in the stroller and roam around the mall sometimes. I wish I could hold her more but honestly my back is still recovering from giving birth. Even with the sling, I can hold her for an hour max.
What really concerns me is when i see moms putting car-seats in strollers that are not supposed to hold them. Today at the mall i saw this one lady stuff a car-seat into a teeny umbrella stroller. There was no strap or anything to hold it in place. Very dangerous.

Having said that... Leela is not much of a hold-me baby.. when we are at home she struggles when i want to cuddle her.. she really likes to be on her own with her pentapus in the gymini! LOL.

I am totally rambling at this point.. but just wanted to reply and say that i did not get offended at all. I love to hear everyones points of view... it makes me a better mom by learning through everyones experiences. Hugs.

PS: Love Kai's new avatar. :)