McQ
03-29-2004, 11:55 AM
So I don't know if you all remember my rant from a few months ago about my ex-neighbor that I used to share a nanny with but here she goes again...
My nanny called me last night and told me that the ex-neighbor just called her and said she needed for her to come down there on April 16th. My neighbor had already made her reservation and the flight times were Friday evening returning Monday morning and told her she needed to know immediately as the reservation expired at midnight. The nanny wanted to clear this with me as the Monday flight totally conflicts with when she works for me. So I told my nanny I'd need to talk with DH to see if we could give her the time off and I'd call her back.
So my mind starts racing wondering why my nanny used the word "need". Should it have been "wants" or even "would like". Now let me just state that I do not mean any disrespect about what I'm about to type but English is my nanny's second language so maybe she just said "need" not realizing the tizzy in my head or that my ex-neighbor really did say "need". I got all caught up in the nuance. If my ex-neighbor WOULD LIKE my nanny to come visit the little girl that's one thing. If the ex-neighbor NEEDED my nanny to come down there, well that's a different story all together.
So DH and I talked and decided that we'd give the nanny the time off. It wasn't up to us to approve of why the nanny was taking off. Sure I hated the fact that my nanny would be with my ex-neighbor but it's not my place to tell her what she can and can do when she's not in my home. And while I may not like the reason that she's taking off, that I can not let that factor in my decision. I looked at it as my employer can't tell me what I can do on my days off so I felt like I couldn't tell her what she could do. The arrangement that we have with the nanny is that we give her off when we take off for things such as holidays/vacations, or life happenings like when our mothers come to visit, doctor's appointments, snow days etc. Things come up in life and we've told the nanny that if she ever needs to take a day for personal reasons, then just to let us know and she can have the day off. My nanny is very conscience about things and she's only once (with this being twice) asked for time off. So I'm not worried that either party takes abuse of our arrangement.
So I called my nanny and told her this would be okay. And then my nanny told me that she was hoping I'd say no because she didn't want to go. So I told her that if she didn't want to go then just to tell my ex-neighbor no. She really didn't feel comfortable saying that (probably because my ex-neighbor can be real demanding) and that she'd rather have an excuse that my neighbor couldn't argue with. So I told her if it made her feel any better then she couldn't have the day off. We both got a chuckle out of that. Things were cool and I was happy that my nanny didn't want to go down there.
So this morning my nanny & I talked about this again and she gave me more scoop. That my ex-neighbor had wanted my nanny to go down there to WORK for her that weekend. That my ex-neighbor was moving from the temporary housing into their house and she needed the nanny to watch the little girl. WTF! So no notice, no asking, just calling up and making a reservation and expecting my nanny to drop everything to go work for her states away. Seriously the entitlement that this woman has is beyond words!!!
Allison
~ mommy to Declan 3.24.03
and number 2 EDD 9.14.04
My nanny called me last night and told me that the ex-neighbor just called her and said she needed for her to come down there on April 16th. My neighbor had already made her reservation and the flight times were Friday evening returning Monday morning and told her she needed to know immediately as the reservation expired at midnight. The nanny wanted to clear this with me as the Monday flight totally conflicts with when she works for me. So I told my nanny I'd need to talk with DH to see if we could give her the time off and I'd call her back.
So my mind starts racing wondering why my nanny used the word "need". Should it have been "wants" or even "would like". Now let me just state that I do not mean any disrespect about what I'm about to type but English is my nanny's second language so maybe she just said "need" not realizing the tizzy in my head or that my ex-neighbor really did say "need". I got all caught up in the nuance. If my ex-neighbor WOULD LIKE my nanny to come visit the little girl that's one thing. If the ex-neighbor NEEDED my nanny to come down there, well that's a different story all together.
So DH and I talked and decided that we'd give the nanny the time off. It wasn't up to us to approve of why the nanny was taking off. Sure I hated the fact that my nanny would be with my ex-neighbor but it's not my place to tell her what she can and can do when she's not in my home. And while I may not like the reason that she's taking off, that I can not let that factor in my decision. I looked at it as my employer can't tell me what I can do on my days off so I felt like I couldn't tell her what she could do. The arrangement that we have with the nanny is that we give her off when we take off for things such as holidays/vacations, or life happenings like when our mothers come to visit, doctor's appointments, snow days etc. Things come up in life and we've told the nanny that if she ever needs to take a day for personal reasons, then just to let us know and she can have the day off. My nanny is very conscience about things and she's only once (with this being twice) asked for time off. So I'm not worried that either party takes abuse of our arrangement.
So I called my nanny and told her this would be okay. And then my nanny told me that she was hoping I'd say no because she didn't want to go. So I told her that if she didn't want to go then just to tell my ex-neighbor no. She really didn't feel comfortable saying that (probably because my ex-neighbor can be real demanding) and that she'd rather have an excuse that my neighbor couldn't argue with. So I told her if it made her feel any better then she couldn't have the day off. We both got a chuckle out of that. Things were cool and I was happy that my nanny didn't want to go down there.
So this morning my nanny & I talked about this again and she gave me more scoop. That my ex-neighbor had wanted my nanny to go down there to WORK for her that weekend. That my ex-neighbor was moving from the temporary housing into their house and she needed the nanny to watch the little girl. WTF! So no notice, no asking, just calling up and making a reservation and expecting my nanny to drop everything to go work for her states away. Seriously the entitlement that this woman has is beyond words!!!
Allison
~ mommy to Declan 3.24.03
and number 2 EDD 9.14.04