Bottle propping...ARGH!

[Imperia]

I was out and about with DD the other day and I passed by two women, and older one and a younger one with a baby in a Peg stroller. The younger woman was off talking with someone and the older woman was glancing in at the baby from time to time. I love to look at babies so I peeped inside.

Inside the stroller was a little boy, who could not have been much older than my DD, I would say he was 3 or 4 months tops! And he was lying on his back with a bottle propped up (he was too little to grab ahold of it) and sputtering and trying to keep up with the flow.
I didn't say anything as the older woman smiled at me, but I quickly walked away, because if I stayed I might have gotten fairly angry.

I keep wondering if I should have said something because I was really worried about the baby choking when the woman was looking away, even though she was right there he could aspirate. I know that plenty of women give a bottle and that's totally their choice, but they should still HOLD the baby, especially a tiny one who can't hold their own bottle, while they are eating. On the other hand, I know that often when you set into situations like this people become angry and defensive.

Sigh.

Imperia

[trumansmom]

Isn't that so hard? When DS was 7 months old we went to a 4th of July party. There was a couple with a 3 month old there. They kept him in his stroller the entire time, sat on either side of him smoking, and over the course of 4 hours gave him three HUGE bottles of formula with RICE added and propped up the bottle for him. At three months, the kid already weighed 20 pounds. Oh! And he was wearing a blanket sleeper outside in July! I wanted to shake his parents. What on earth could they have been thinking?

It was an outdoor party, but it made me crazy to have to keep moving around to avoid the wind and the smoke. Yuck.

Jeanne
Mom to Truman 11/29/01 and EDD 4/23/04!

[JenCA]

Oh, that's so sad. My DD is 8 mos and just very recently started holding her own bottle (actually, she has started taking the bottle away from me and DH when we try to feed her. She doesn't want mommy and daddy to hold her bottle for her anymore..*sob*!). We have NEVER propped Julia's bottle, ever, not for any reason. Even though she now holds her bottle while drinking it--we still hold and cuddle her while she drinks it. That scenario would have saddened me, too, but you're right--people get angry and defensive when you question their parenting methods.

[Melanie]

Oh that's terrible. I get so sad when I see that. People just don't realize what a bonding experience feeding can be. They even sell some horrible bottle-propping devices, too.

I don't know what I would have done. Maybe instead of addressing the "bottle propping" thing, just said, "Oh how cute...uh-oh...I think he's choking? Some kinds of bottles just flow too fast, don't they?" like it's the bottles fault? *shrug*

[jraohc]

I agree - if it looked like the baby was choking or going to choke you could have said something like the previous poster suggested - something that made it sound like it was the bottle's fault.

As for the fact that some people prop baby up with a bottle - boy does that suck. I'm still pregnant, but I really can't imagine wanting to just sit baby with a bottle. We went out shopping with my mil and I just wanted to strangle her because she kept telling us that we had to register for this chair she had when my dh was young that enabled her to put him down with his bottle. First of all, our baby will be breastfeeding. Second of all, letting baby eat all by himself? Goodness!

[kijip]

Another vote for diplomatically blaming it on the bottle. You can express concern without utilizing judgment.