Will my baby ever just want to cuddle??

[Judegirl]

Riordan hasn't let us just hold her in our arms since she was about 8 weeks old. Will she ever?? It's making me just a wee bit sad. I mean, I'm glad that she's so interested in the world around her, but sheesh...every SINGLE second with the parents-as-jungle-gym thing?

Not only is it exhausting physically, but we'd kinda like to look into her eyes for more than a nanosecond, enjoy a moment of calm together, that kind of thing. (She's calm and contemplative in the STROLLER, for Pete's sake - why not when we hold her?)

She makes plenty of eye contact when she's not in our arms, she initiates contact and interaction, so we're not worried about it. I just wish that sometimes she'd just let me cuddle her a little bit. She's like a cat that hates to be picked up. :( (And she's the same way in the sling...she loves the sling, but her version of the hip-carry is to be completely horizontal, trying to fly toward the ground...)

She will outgrow this, right? Or were those 8 weeks all we'll ever have?

Thanks for listening,
Jude

[mamaturk]

We are in the same boat. Reilly never lets us cuddle her!!! It makes us a little sad too.. I guess she'll eventually grow out of it. She gets annoyed with DH and I when we try to cuddle her, but I still try all the time. ;)

[Jenn98]

My mom says I was the same way when I was little. Never needed hugs or cuddles, just a pat on the head as I ran by. My only advice to you is if your little one turns out to not be big on physical closeness that doesn't mean that they're not in need of emotional closeness when they're bigger kids. Tell them you love them a million times a day and every now and then go in for the big hug. I promise you they'll love it, even if it's deep down inside!

[crayonblue]

Lauren doesn't like to cuddle. In fact, even as a newborn, she would squirm and twist when anyone would try to rub her back. BUT, she is sick today and sat on the sofa with DH and let him just hold her. Then, she fell asleep sitting next to him. And, I took her upstairs and rocked her in the glider and she laid her head down and went to sleep. So, if nothing else, Riordan may be cuddly when she isn't feeling so well. BTW, I love the name Riordan.

[C99]

I think she'll outgrow it. Nate started to like cuddling when he could be an active participant in it, if that makes any sense. For example, when he realized that he could *give* a hug (around 13-14 months), he would give them and start to cuddle. Now, he really only likes cuddling just after waking or right before bed or naps, or if he's not feeling well.

[Judegirl]

That's weird...I replied and lost it...

Thankfully, Riordan doesn't get annoyed when we hold her; she likes to be in our arms. She smiles and laughs and generally has a good time..she's just more interested in the vantage point and everything she can explore from there, than in cuddling. She won't, for example, put her head on my shoulder, but she'll climb down my propped-up legs so she can play with my toes. She tries to grab our faces, roll around on us, flip upside-down - she wants to be picked up, but she just won't stay still once we do. I just meant she was squirmy like a cat who; I think she likes to be held, but she doesn't want to settle down and JUST be held. It's merely a vehicle for her exploration...

I didn't think it was a disinclination towards affection, just a product of her hyperactive behavior...I hope I'm right about that. I'm very huggy-kissy; I don't want to be chasing her around for a smooch forever! LOL.

Thanks for the feedback so far! And Lana - thank you for the compliment!

Jude

[TahliasMom]

Our little DD is the same way especially the last month she loves to use me a jungle gym. DD uses my body to pull herself up into standing position, pulls on my hair and chews on it, claws at my face/neck and generally climbs over me to get to something else. I miss my snuggle bug...:(

[deborah_r]

Well, Kai has gotten super-snuggly lately (he'll give about 5 hugs in a row, and then just kind of rest on me for a while), so maybe she will be more of a cuddler when she is older? It sounds like she has an amazing amount of energy (from what you've mentioned before) so maybe she is just too "busy" to cuddle?

I'm sorry this is troubling you.

[R2sweetboys]

I can totally relate to you. My first son would never cuddle. When he was only a couple weeks old he would try to lift his head off our shoulders when we held him. He was NEVER content to just sit with us as a baby. It was hard for us too because we just wanted to cuddle with him sometimes. He's always been very active and I do think that it has helped him to learn things fast. He does enjoy affection, just doesn't sit long to get it.:) He's very loving and caring and tells us he loves us all the time.
Our second son is definitely more of a cuddler!(so there's hope:)) He still didn't sit in our laps for long periods ot time as a baby, but he does like to cuddle more than my 4 year old ever did.
All kids are different, that's for sure. Your daughter may change all of a sudden and love affection. Just try and enjoy her little personality and know that, no matter what, she loves you and DH more than anyone in the world!!
~Leslie

SAHM to...
Ryan 8/14/00
Matthew 2/14/03

[tarahsolazy]

Fory's not much into cuddling these days, either. Even while nursing he has to either squeeze my breast, pull on my shirt or hair, or fondle his pacifier with his free hand. My only stolen cuddles are our 11pm nursing, since he's pretty much asleep, he will let me snuggle him up! I love that, so I'm not giving up that session any time soon. I think it might be a function of age, these babes on the go are more interested in biting your knee or pulling your hair than hugs.

[tinkerbell1217]

After my oldest DD hit about 3 months she stopped wanting to cuddle too. I think its pretty normal. Especially for "high octane" babies!! Riordan sounds like one to me, so was my first DD. I have to admit she has never gone back to being a cuddly kid either. We have a strange relationship. She is almost 16 so I know thats alot of it, but even when she was little, like 6 or 7, she still didn't like being hugged and kissed on. Its just her personality. My DS is a total opposite! He is a marshmallow and loves to hug and cuddle and kiss me. Baby #3 is still very small, almost 3 months, so she is still loving on me. I wonder if she will take after her sister or her brother??

[Puddy73]

I understand exactly how you feel. Annabelle has never been a cuddly baby. She's been "on the move" since she was born. But sometimes when she is playing, she will run over to me and give me a hug or a kiss and dash off again. It just melts my heart! I'm sure that Riordan will reciprocate your affection in her own way when she is a little older.

Jennifer
Mommy to Annabelle Mae 9/8/03

"Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."

[Sarah1]

Audrey has never been interested in cuddling, aside from when she was just a teeny newborn. The rare times that she WILL cuddle are when she's sick...so at least that's one good thing about her being sick. It brings out her cuddly side :)