Love or Hate your IL's?

[ChefGirl]

Is there a middle ground? Is it just natural to compare your MIL and FIL to your own parents? Do you love or hate your IL's or do you just tolerate them?

Personally, I just tolerate them. I will NEVER leave my kids with them unsupervised. MIL had a spring yo-yo type of toy. She gave it to DS to play. Well, he was playing it with FIL who let the spring go and ended springing back on DS' face. DS screamed and his face was swallon instantly. Araaaaaghghhh..... We were lucky that it didn't hit his eyes. Ugh.... Oh, get this, for DS's birthday last month, since everyone knows he likes lollipop, so MIL bought him these hard candy lollipops, let me add to say, Easter Lollipops wrapped in rubber bands. They are unopened of course. But, Easter? What the heck! Did she get them from dollar store clearance? Ugh!

I don't HATE them! I just don't care for them. I don't enjoy their company. I don't enjoy our so-called "family get together". It's a waste of time. We don't talk about anything in substance. They don't play with the kids. Unlike them, my parents actually sit down on the floor and play with them. SIL put her son on a "schedule" when he was only two months old. We had to arrange everything around his "schedule".

I can go on and on forever. Thanks for letting me vent!

[ChefGirl]

Is there a middle ground? Is it just natural to compare your MIL and FIL to your own parents? Do you love or hate your IL's or do you just tolerate them?

Personally, I just tolerate them. I will NEVER leave my kids with them unsupervised. MIL had a spring yo-yo type of toy. She gave it to DS to play. Well, he was playing it with FIL who let the spring go and ended springing back on DS' face. DS screamed and his face was swallon instantly. Araaaaaghghhh..... We were lucky that it didn't hit his eyes. Ugh.... Oh, get this, for DS's birthday last month, since everyone knows he likes lollipop, so MIL bought him these hard candy lollipops, let me add to say, Easter Lollipops wrapped in rubber bands. They are unopened of course. But, Easter? What the heck! Did she get them from dollar store clearance? Ugh!

I don't HATE them! I just don't care for them. I don't enjoy their company. I don't enjoy our so-called "family get together". It's a waste of time. We don't talk about anything in substance. They don't play with the kids. Unlike them, my parents actually sit down on the floor and play with them. SIL put her son on a "schedule" when he was only two months old. We had to arrange everything around his "schedule".

I can go on and on forever. Thanks for letting me vent!

[ChefGirl]

Is there a middle ground? Is it just natural to compare your MIL and FIL to your own parents? Do you love or hate your IL's or do you just tolerate them?

Personally, I just tolerate them. I will NEVER leave my kids with them unsupervised. MIL had a spring yo-yo type of toy. She gave it to DS to play. Well, he was playing it with FIL who let the spring go and ended springing back on DS' face. DS screamed and his face was swallon instantly. Araaaaaghghhh..... We were lucky that it didn't hit his eyes. Ugh.... Oh, get this, for DS's birthday last month, since everyone knows he likes lollipop, so MIL bought him these hard candy lollipops, let me add to say, Easter Lollipops wrapped in rubber bands. They are unopened of course. But, Easter? What the heck! Did she get them from dollar store clearance? Ugh!

I don't HATE them! I just don't care for them. I don't enjoy their company. I don't enjoy our so-called "family get together". It's a waste of time. We don't talk about anything in substance. They don't play with the kids. Unlike them, my parents actually sit down on the floor and play with them. SIL put her son on a "schedule" when he was only two months old. We had to arrange everything around his "schedule".

I can go on and on forever. Thanks for letting me vent!

[ChefGirl]

Is there a middle ground? Is it just natural to compare your MIL and FIL to your own parents? Do you love or hate your IL's or do you just tolerate them?

Personally, I just tolerate them. I will NEVER leave my kids with them unsupervised. MIL had a spring yo-yo type of toy. She gave it to DS to play. Well, he was playing it with FIL who let the spring go and ended springing back on DS' face. DS screamed and his face was swallon instantly. Araaaaaghghhh..... We were lucky that it didn't hit his eyes. Ugh.... Oh, get this, for DS's birthday last month, since everyone knows he likes lollipop, so MIL bought him these hard candy lollipops, let me add to say, Easter Lollipops wrapped in rubber bands. They are unopened of course. But, Easter? What the heck! Did she get them from dollar store clearance? Ugh!

I don't HATE them! I just don't care for them. I don't enjoy their company. I don't enjoy our so-called "family get together". It's a waste of time. We don't talk about anything in substance. They don't play with the kids. Unlike them, my parents actually sit down on the floor and play with them. SIL put her son on a "schedule" when he was only two months old. We had to arrange everything around his "schedule".

I can go on and on forever. Thanks for letting me vent!

[ChefGirl]

Is there a middle ground? Is it just natural to compare your MIL and FIL to your own parents? Do you love or hate your IL's or do you just tolerate them?

Personally, I just tolerate them. I will NEVER leave my kids with them unsupervised. MIL had a spring yo-yo type of toy. She gave it to DS to play. Well, he was playing it with FIL who let the spring go and ended springing back on DS' face. DS screamed and his face was swallon instantly. Araaaaaghghhh..... We were lucky that it didn't hit his eyes. Ugh.... Oh, get this, for DS's birthday last month, since everyone knows he likes lollipop, so MIL bought him these hard candy lollipops, let me add to say, Easter Lollipops wrapped in rubber bands. They are unopened of course. But, Easter? What the heck! Did she get them from dollar store clearance? Ugh!

I don't HATE them! I just don't care for them. I don't enjoy their company. I don't enjoy our so-called "family get together". It's a waste of time. We don't talk about anything in substance. They don't play with the kids. Unlike them, my parents actually sit down on the floor and play with them. SIL put her son on a "schedule" when he was only two months old. We had to arrange everything around his "schedule".

I can go on and on forever. Thanks for letting me vent!

[ChefGirl]

Is there a middle ground? Is it just natural to compare your MIL and FIL to your own parents? Do you love or hate your IL's or do you just tolerate them?

Personally, I just tolerate them. I will NEVER leave my kids with them unsupervised. MIL had a spring yo-yo type of toy. She gave it to DS to play. Well, he was playing it with FIL who let the spring go and ended springing back on DS' face. DS screamed and his face was swallon instantly. Araaaaaghghhh..... We were lucky that it didn't hit his eyes. Ugh.... Oh, get this, for DS's birthday last month, since everyone knows he likes lollipop, so MIL bought him these hard candy lollipops, let me add to say, Easter Lollipops wrapped in rubber bands. They are unopened of course. But, Easter? What the heck! Did she get them from dollar store clearance? Ugh!

I don't HATE them! I just don't care for them. I don't enjoy their company. I don't enjoy our so-called "family get together". It's a waste of time. We don't talk about anything in substance. They don't play with the kids. Unlike them, my parents actually sit down on the floor and play with them. SIL put her son on a "schedule" when he was only two months old. We had to arrange everything around his "schedule".

I can go on and on forever. Thanks for letting me vent!

[ChefGirl]

Is there a middle ground? Is it just natural to compare your MIL and FIL to your own parents? Do you love or hate your IL's or do you just tolerate them?

Personally, I just tolerate them. I will NEVER leave my kids with them unsupervised. MIL had a spring yo-yo type of toy. She gave it to DS to play. Well, he was playing it with FIL who let the spring go and ended springing back on DS' face. DS screamed and his face was swallon instantly. Araaaaaghghhh..... We were lucky that it didn't hit his eyes. Ugh.... Oh, get this, for DS's birthday last month, since everyone knows he likes lollipop, so MIL bought him these hard candy lollipops, let me add to say, Easter Lollipops wrapped in rubber bands. They are unopened of course. But, Easter? What the heck! Did she get them from dollar store clearance? Ugh!

I don't HATE them! I just don't care for them. I don't enjoy their company. I don't enjoy our so-called "family get together". It's a waste of time. We don't talk about anything in substance. They don't play with the kids. Unlike them, my parents actually sit down on the floor and play with them. SIL put her son on a "schedule" when he was only two months old. We had to arrange everything around his "schedule".

I can go on and on forever. Thanks for letting me vent!

[ChefGirl]

Is there a middle ground? Is it just natural to compare your MIL and FIL to your own parents? Do you love or hate your IL's or do you just tolerate them?

Personally, I just tolerate them. I will NEVER leave my kids with them unsupervised. MIL had a spring yo-yo type of toy. She gave it to DS to play. Well, he was playing it with FIL who let the spring go and ended springing back on DS' face. DS screamed and his face was swallon instantly. Araaaaaghghhh..... We were lucky that it didn't hit his eyes. Ugh.... Oh, get this, for DS's birthday last month, since everyone knows he likes lollipop, so MIL bought him these hard candy lollipops, let me add to say, Easter Lollipops wrapped in rubber bands. They are unopened of course. But, Easter? What the heck! Did she get them from dollar store clearance? Ugh!

I don't HATE them! I just don't care for them. I don't enjoy their company. I don't enjoy our so-called "family get together". It's a waste of time. We don't talk about anything in substance. They don't play with the kids. Unlike them, my parents actually sit down on the floor and play with them. SIL put her son on a "schedule" when he was only two months old. We had to arrange everything around his "schedule".

I can go on and on forever. Thanks for letting me vent!

[ChefGirl]

Is there a middle ground? Is it just natural to compare your MIL and FIL to your own parents? Do you love or hate your IL's or do you just tolerate them?

Personally, I just tolerate them. I will NEVER leave my kids with them unsupervised. MIL had a spring yo-yo type of toy. She gave it to DS to play. Well, he was playing it with FIL who let the spring go and ended springing back on DS' face. DS screamed and his face was swallon instantly. Araaaaaghghhh..... We were lucky that it didn't hit his eyes. Ugh.... Oh, get this, for DS's birthday last month, since everyone knows he likes lollipop, so MIL bought him these hard candy lollipops, let me add to say, Easter Lollipops wrapped in rubber bands. They are unopened of course. But, Easter? What the heck! Did she get them from dollar store clearance? Ugh!

I don't HATE them! I just don't care for them. I don't enjoy their company. I don't enjoy our so-called "family get together". It's a waste of time. We don't talk about anything in substance. They don't play with the kids. Unlike them, my parents actually sit down on the floor and play with them. SIL put her son on a "schedule" when he was only two months old. We had to arrange everything around his "schedule".

I can go on and on forever. Thanks for letting me vent!

[kedss]

Well, my in-laws have been here for about a month and a half, so I try to get along with them, they are sweet people, but I have lost what little control I had of my life/house/whatever. They do take DS out without me, because they really good with him, and it gives me a break which I need, since he has hit the terrible 2s with a vengeance.

My mom who lives 45 minutes away only sees DS once or twice a month, so I'm glad the in-laws love hanging out with him.

Hope it gets better!

[kedss]

Well, my in-laws have been here for about a month and a half, so I try to get along with them, they are sweet people, but I have lost what little control I had of my life/house/whatever. They do take DS out without me, because they really good with him, and it gives me a break which I need, since he has hit the terrible 2s with a vengeance.

My mom who lives 45 minutes away only sees DS once or twice a month, so I'm glad the in-laws love hanging out with him.

Hope it gets better!

[kedss]

Well, my in-laws have been here for about a month and a half, so I try to get along with them, they are sweet people, but I have lost what little control I had of my life/house/whatever. They do take DS out without me, because they really good with him, and it gives me a break which I need, since he has hit the terrible 2s with a vengeance.

My mom who lives 45 minutes away only sees DS once or twice a month, so I'm glad the in-laws love hanging out with him.

Hope it gets better!

[kedss]

Well, my in-laws have been here for about a month and a half, so I try to get along with them, they are sweet people, but I have lost what little control I had of my life/house/whatever. They do take DS out without me, because they really good with him, and it gives me a break which I need, since he has hit the terrible 2s with a vengeance.

My mom who lives 45 minutes away only sees DS once or twice a month, so I'm glad the in-laws love hanging out with him.

Hope it gets better!

[kedss]

Well, my in-laws have been here for about a month and a half, so I try to get along with them, they are sweet people, but I have lost what little control I had of my life/house/whatever. They do take DS out without me, because they really good with him, and it gives me a break which I need, since he has hit the terrible 2s with a vengeance.

My mom who lives 45 minutes away only sees DS once or twice a month, so I'm glad the in-laws love hanging out with him.

Hope it gets better!

[kedss]

Well, my in-laws have been here for about a month and a half, so I try to get along with them, they are sweet people, but I have lost what little control I had of my life/house/whatever. They do take DS out without me, because they really good with him, and it gives me a break which I need, since he has hit the terrible 2s with a vengeance.

My mom who lives 45 minutes away only sees DS once or twice a month, so I'm glad the in-laws love hanging out with him.

Hope it gets better!

[kedss]

Well, my in-laws have been here for about a month and a half, so I try to get along with them, they are sweet people, but I have lost what little control I had of my life/house/whatever. They do take DS out without me, because they really good with him, and it gives me a break which I need, since he has hit the terrible 2s with a vengeance.

My mom who lives 45 minutes away only sees DS once or twice a month, so I'm glad the in-laws love hanging out with him.

Hope it gets better!

[kedss]

Well, my in-laws have been here for about a month and a half, so I try to get along with them, they are sweet people, but I have lost what little control I had of my life/house/whatever. They do take DS out without me, because they really good with him, and it gives me a break which I need, since he has hit the terrible 2s with a vengeance.

My mom who lives 45 minutes away only sees DS once or twice a month, so I'm glad the in-laws love hanging out with him.

Hope it gets better!

[kedss]

Well, my in-laws have been here for about a month and a half, so I try to get along with them, they are sweet people, but I have lost what little control I had of my life/house/whatever. They do take DS out without me, because they really good with him, and it gives me a break which I need, since he has hit the terrible 2s with a vengeance.

My mom who lives 45 minutes away only sees DS once or twice a month, so I'm glad the in-laws love hanging out with him.

Hope it gets better!

[psophia17]

I think there's middle ground - I love my ILs, but they drive me crazy on so many levels. It's hard to figure out what you can live with and what you need to put your foot down about, and it's even harder to get that message across without offending...

On the flip side, I love my parents, but they drive me crazy on so many levels. My mom is queen of baby gear purchased at the dollar store or from flea markets (I had to put my foot down about the basinett that was held together with duct tape), and my Dad loved nothing more than to feed DS (at only a few weeks old) a fingerful of butter and sugar...

I take a lot of deep breaths to try and deal with both sets of grandparents...it's just a matter of picking the right battles (the ones you can win are the best kind to pick ;) )

[psophia17]

I think there's middle ground - I love my ILs, but they drive me crazy on so many levels. It's hard to figure out what you can live with and what you need to put your foot down about, and it's even harder to get that message across without offending...

On the flip side, I love my parents, but they drive me crazy on so many levels. My mom is queen of baby gear purchased at the dollar store or from flea markets (I had to put my foot down about the basinett that was held together with duct tape), and my Dad loved nothing more than to feed DS (at only a few weeks old) a fingerful of butter and sugar...

I take a lot of deep breaths to try and deal with both sets of grandparents...it's just a matter of picking the right battles (the ones you can win are the best kind to pick ;) )

[psophia17]

I think there's middle ground - I love my ILs, but they drive me crazy on so many levels. It's hard to figure out what you can live with and what you need to put your foot down about, and it's even harder to get that message across without offending...

On the flip side, I love my parents, but they drive me crazy on so many levels. My mom is queen of baby gear purchased at the dollar store or from flea markets (I had to put my foot down about the basinett that was held together with duct tape), and my Dad loved nothing more than to feed DS (at only a few weeks old) a fingerful of butter and sugar...

I take a lot of deep breaths to try and deal with both sets of grandparents...it's just a matter of picking the right battles (the ones you can win are the best kind to pick ;) )

[psophia17]

I think there's middle ground - I love my ILs, but they drive me crazy on so many levels. It's hard to figure out what you can live with and what you need to put your foot down about, and it's even harder to get that message across without offending...

On the flip side, I love my parents, but they drive me crazy on so many levels. My mom is queen of baby gear purchased at the dollar store or from flea markets (I had to put my foot down about the basinett that was held together with duct tape), and my Dad loved nothing more than to feed DS (at only a few weeks old) a fingerful of butter and sugar...

I take a lot of deep breaths to try and deal with both sets of grandparents...it's just a matter of picking the right battles (the ones you can win are the best kind to pick ;) )

[psophia17]

I think there's middle ground - I love my ILs, but they drive me crazy on so many levels. It's hard to figure out what you can live with and what you need to put your foot down about, and it's even harder to get that message across without offending...

On the flip side, I love my parents, but they drive me crazy on so many levels. My mom is queen of baby gear purchased at the dollar store or from flea markets (I had to put my foot down about the basinett that was held together with duct tape), and my Dad loved nothing more than to feed DS (at only a few weeks old) a fingerful of butter and sugar...

I take a lot of deep breaths to try and deal with both sets of grandparents...it's just a matter of picking the right battles (the ones you can win are the best kind to pick ;) )

[psophia17]

I think there's middle ground - I love my ILs, but they drive me crazy on so many levels. It's hard to figure out what you can live with and what you need to put your foot down about, and it's even harder to get that message across without offending...

On the flip side, I love my parents, but they drive me crazy on so many levels. My mom is queen of baby gear purchased at the dollar store or from flea markets (I had to put my foot down about the basinett that was held together with duct tape), and my Dad loved nothing more than to feed DS (at only a few weeks old) a fingerful of butter and sugar...

I take a lot of deep breaths to try and deal with both sets of grandparents...it's just a matter of picking the right battles (the ones you can win are the best kind to pick ;) )

[psophia17]

I think there's middle ground - I love my ILs, but they drive me crazy on so many levels. It's hard to figure out what you can live with and what you need to put your foot down about, and it's even harder to get that message across without offending...

On the flip side, I love my parents, but they drive me crazy on so many levels. My mom is queen of baby gear purchased at the dollar store or from flea markets (I had to put my foot down about the basinett that was held together with duct tape), and my Dad loved nothing more than to feed DS (at only a few weeks old) a fingerful of butter and sugar...

I take a lot of deep breaths to try and deal with both sets of grandparents...it's just a matter of picking the right battles (the ones you can win are the best kind to pick ;) )

[psophia17]

I think there's middle ground - I love my ILs, but they drive me crazy on so many levels. It's hard to figure out what you can live with and what you need to put your foot down about, and it's even harder to get that message across without offending...

On the flip side, I love my parents, but they drive me crazy on so many levels. My mom is queen of baby gear purchased at the dollar store or from flea markets (I had to put my foot down about the basinett that was held together with duct tape), and my Dad loved nothing more than to feed DS (at only a few weeks old) a fingerful of butter and sugar...

I take a lot of deep breaths to try and deal with both sets of grandparents...it's just a matter of picking the right battles (the ones you can win are the best kind to pick ;) )

[psophia17]

I think there's middle ground - I love my ILs, but they drive me crazy on so many levels. It's hard to figure out what you can live with and what you need to put your foot down about, and it's even harder to get that message across without offending...

On the flip side, I love my parents, but they drive me crazy on so many levels. My mom is queen of baby gear purchased at the dollar store or from flea markets (I had to put my foot down about the basinett that was held together with duct tape), and my Dad loved nothing more than to feed DS (at only a few weeks old) a fingerful of butter and sugar...

I take a lot of deep breaths to try and deal with both sets of grandparents...it's just a matter of picking the right battles (the ones you can win are the best kind to pick ;) )

[elliput]

I am very fortunate. I have IL's who accepted me into their family, and have been supportive and generous beyond my wildest expectations. And I can have some pretty *wild* expectations! ;-) I do love my IL's. That being said, my FIL has some confidence issues and is often self-depreciating and my MIL can be a bit of a ditz, but I would have no problem with leaving DD in their care. They understand that I am the parent, and what I say goes. I just wish, like with my family, that we lived closer.

[elliput]

I am very fortunate. I have IL's who accepted me into their family, and have been supportive and generous beyond my wildest expectations. And I can have some pretty *wild* expectations! ;-) I do love my IL's. That being said, my FIL has some confidence issues and is often self-depreciating and my MIL can be a bit of a ditz, but I would have no problem with leaving DD in their care. They understand that I am the parent, and what I say goes. I just wish, like with my family, that we lived closer.

[elliput]

I am very fortunate. I have IL's who accepted me into their family, and have been supportive and generous beyond my wildest expectations. And I can have some pretty *wild* expectations! ;-) I do love my IL's. That being said, my FIL has some confidence issues and is often self-depreciating and my MIL can be a bit of a ditz, but I would have no problem with leaving DD in their care. They understand that I am the parent, and what I say goes. I just wish, like with my family, that we lived closer.

[elliput]

I am very fortunate. I have IL's who accepted me into their family, and have been supportive and generous beyond my wildest expectations. And I can have some pretty *wild* expectations! ;-) I do love my IL's. That being said, my FIL has some confidence issues and is often self-depreciating and my MIL can be a bit of a ditz, but I would have no problem with leaving DD in their care. They understand that I am the parent, and what I say goes. I just wish, like with my family, that we lived closer.

[elliput]

I am very fortunate. I have IL's who accepted me into their family, and have been supportive and generous beyond my wildest expectations. And I can have some pretty *wild* expectations! ;-) I do love my IL's. That being said, my FIL has some confidence issues and is often self-depreciating and my MIL can be a bit of a ditz, but I would have no problem with leaving DD in their care. They understand that I am the parent, and what I say goes. I just wish, like with my family, that we lived closer.

[elliput]

I am very fortunate. I have IL's who accepted me into their family, and have been supportive and generous beyond my wildest expectations. And I can have some pretty *wild* expectations! ;-) I do love my IL's. That being said, my FIL has some confidence issues and is often self-depreciating and my MIL can be a bit of a ditz, but I would have no problem with leaving DD in their care. They understand that I am the parent, and what I say goes. I just wish, like with my family, that we lived closer.

[elliput]

I am very fortunate. I have IL's who accepted me into their family, and have been supportive and generous beyond my wildest expectations. And I can have some pretty *wild* expectations! ;-) I do love my IL's. That being said, my FIL has some confidence issues and is often self-depreciating and my MIL can be a bit of a ditz, but I would have no problem with leaving DD in their care. They understand that I am the parent, and what I say goes. I just wish, like with my family, that we lived closer.

[elliput]

I am very fortunate. I have IL's who accepted me into their family, and have been supportive and generous beyond my wildest expectations. And I can have some pretty *wild* expectations! ;-) I do love my IL's. That being said, my FIL has some confidence issues and is often self-depreciating and my MIL can be a bit of a ditz, but I would have no problem with leaving DD in their care. They understand that I am the parent, and what I say goes. I just wish, like with my family, that we lived closer.

[elliput]

I am very fortunate. I have IL's who accepted me into their family, and have been supportive and generous beyond my wildest expectations. And I can have some pretty *wild* expectations! ;-) I do love my IL's. That being said, my FIL has some confidence issues and is often self-depreciating and my MIL can be a bit of a ditz, but I would have no problem with leaving DD in their care. They understand that I am the parent, and what I say goes. I just wish, like with my family, that we lived closer.

[rorycam]

I really love my ILs and enjoy spending time with them. Of course they have their moments and peccadillos like everyone, but I trust them 100% and like them a lot. In fact, I find spending time with them can be easier than with my own parents, because they act like they love me unconditionally, whereas my own parents always have something to say about what I need to do, how I should do this or that differently, etc. I love my parents, but there is a lot of pressure that comes with that love that simply is not there with DH's parents.

Also, they respect my choices 100% when it comes to DS, and I've never seen prouder, more involved grandparents. We laugh a lot when we're together, and they love to get down on the floor and play with DS, even though they're 80 years old. I definitely got lucky!

[rorycam]

I really love my ILs and enjoy spending time with them. Of course they have their moments and peccadillos like everyone, but I trust them 100% and like them a lot. In fact, I find spending time with them can be easier than with my own parents, because they act like they love me unconditionally, whereas my own parents always have something to say about what I need to do, how I should do this or that differently, etc. I love my parents, but there is a lot of pressure that comes with that love that simply is not there with DH's parents.

Also, they respect my choices 100% when it comes to DS, and I've never seen prouder, more involved grandparents. We laugh a lot when we're together, and they love to get down on the floor and play with DS, even though they're 80 years old. I definitely got lucky!

[rorycam]

I really love my ILs and enjoy spending time with them. Of course they have their moments and peccadillos like everyone, but I trust them 100% and like them a lot. In fact, I find spending time with them can be easier than with my own parents, because they act like they love me unconditionally, whereas my own parents always have something to say about what I need to do, how I should do this or that differently, etc. I love my parents, but there is a lot of pressure that comes with that love that simply is not there with DH's parents.

Also, they respect my choices 100% when it comes to DS, and I've never seen prouder, more involved grandparents. We laugh a lot when we're together, and they love to get down on the floor and play with DS, even though they're 80 years old. I definitely got lucky!

[rorycam]

I really love my ILs and enjoy spending time with them. Of course they have their moments and peccadillos like everyone, but I trust them 100% and like them a lot. In fact, I find spending time with them can be easier than with my own parents, because they act like they love me unconditionally, whereas my own parents always have something to say about what I need to do, how I should do this or that differently, etc. I love my parents, but there is a lot of pressure that comes with that love that simply is not there with DH's parents.

Also, they respect my choices 100% when it comes to DS, and I've never seen prouder, more involved grandparents. We laugh a lot when we're together, and they love to get down on the floor and play with DS, even though they're 80 years old. I definitely got lucky!

[rorycam]

I really love my ILs and enjoy spending time with them. Of course they have their moments and peccadillos like everyone, but I trust them 100% and like them a lot. In fact, I find spending time with them can be easier than with my own parents, because they act like they love me unconditionally, whereas my own parents always have something to say about what I need to do, how I should do this or that differently, etc. I love my parents, but there is a lot of pressure that comes with that love that simply is not there with DH's parents.

Also, they respect my choices 100% when it comes to DS, and I've never seen prouder, more involved grandparents. We laugh a lot when we're together, and they love to get down on the floor and play with DS, even though they're 80 years old. I definitely got lucky!

[rorycam]

I really love my ILs and enjoy spending time with them. Of course they have their moments and peccadillos like everyone, but I trust them 100% and like them a lot. In fact, I find spending time with them can be easier than with my own parents, because they act like they love me unconditionally, whereas my own parents always have something to say about what I need to do, how I should do this or that differently, etc. I love my parents, but there is a lot of pressure that comes with that love that simply is not there with DH's parents.

Also, they respect my choices 100% when it comes to DS, and I've never seen prouder, more involved grandparents. We laugh a lot when we're together, and they love to get down on the floor and play with DS, even though they're 80 years old. I definitely got lucky!

[rorycam]

I really love my ILs and enjoy spending time with them. Of course they have their moments and peccadillos like everyone, but I trust them 100% and like them a lot. In fact, I find spending time with them can be easier than with my own parents, because they act like they love me unconditionally, whereas my own parents always have something to say about what I need to do, how I should do this or that differently, etc. I love my parents, but there is a lot of pressure that comes with that love that simply is not there with DH's parents.

Also, they respect my choices 100% when it comes to DS, and I've never seen prouder, more involved grandparents. We laugh a lot when we're together, and they love to get down on the floor and play with DS, even though they're 80 years old. I definitely got lucky!

[rorycam]

I really love my ILs and enjoy spending time with them. Of course they have their moments and peccadillos like everyone, but I trust them 100% and like them a lot. In fact, I find spending time with them can be easier than with my own parents, because they act like they love me unconditionally, whereas my own parents always have something to say about what I need to do, how I should do this or that differently, etc. I love my parents, but there is a lot of pressure that comes with that love that simply is not there with DH's parents.

Also, they respect my choices 100% when it comes to DS, and I've never seen prouder, more involved grandparents. We laugh a lot when we're together, and they love to get down on the floor and play with DS, even though they're 80 years old. I definitely got lucky!

[rorycam]

I really love my ILs and enjoy spending time with them. Of course they have their moments and peccadillos like everyone, but I trust them 100% and like them a lot. In fact, I find spending time with them can be easier than with my own parents, because they act like they love me unconditionally, whereas my own parents always have something to say about what I need to do, how I should do this or that differently, etc. I love my parents, but there is a lot of pressure that comes with that love that simply is not there with DH's parents.

Also, they respect my choices 100% when it comes to DS, and I've never seen prouder, more involved grandparents. We laugh a lot when we're together, and they love to get down on the floor and play with DS, even though they're 80 years old. I definitely got lucky!

[ChefGirl]

YOU definitely got LUCKY in the IL's department.

[ChefGirl]

YOU definitely got LUCKY in the IL's department.

[ChefGirl]

YOU definitely got LUCKY in the IL's department.

[ChefGirl]

YOU definitely got LUCKY in the IL's department.

[ChefGirl]

YOU definitely got LUCKY in the IL's department.

[ChefGirl]

YOU definitely got LUCKY in the IL's department.

[ChefGirl]

YOU definitely got LUCKY in the IL's department.

[ChefGirl]

YOU definitely got LUCKY in the IL's department.

[ChefGirl]

YOU definitely got LUCKY in the IL's department.

[jbowman]

I adore my ILs, especially my MIL. She and I share a lot of similar ideas on parenting, she has an awesome sense of humor, and I admire the heck out of her (Ivy League education, became a SAHM and raised four kids--she can translate Latin and give excellent breastfeeding advice ;)). I'm not saying that I don't disagree with them or they don't get on my nerves, but overall they are great. I realize how lucky I am. DH is lucky too: he got my parents as ILs. :)

[jbowman]

I adore my ILs, especially my MIL. She and I share a lot of similar ideas on parenting, she has an awesome sense of humor, and I admire the heck out of her (Ivy League education, became a SAHM and raised four kids--she can translate Latin and give excellent breastfeeding advice ;)). I'm not saying that I don't disagree with them or they don't get on my nerves, but overall they are great. I realize how lucky I am. DH is lucky too: he got my parents as ILs. :)

[jbowman]

I adore my ILs, especially my MIL. She and I share a lot of similar ideas on parenting, she has an awesome sense of humor, and I admire the heck out of her (Ivy League education, became a SAHM and raised four kids--she can translate Latin and give excellent breastfeeding advice ;)). I'm not saying that I don't disagree with them or they don't get on my nerves, but overall they are great. I realize how lucky I am. DH is lucky too: he got my parents as ILs. :)

[jbowman]

I adore my ILs, especially my MIL. She and I share a lot of similar ideas on parenting, she has an awesome sense of humor, and I admire the heck out of her (Ivy League education, became a SAHM and raised four kids--she can translate Latin and give excellent breastfeeding advice ;)). I'm not saying that I don't disagree with them or they don't get on my nerves, but overall they are great. I realize how lucky I am. DH is lucky too: he got my parents as ILs. :)

[jbowman]

I adore my ILs, especially my MIL. She and I share a lot of similar ideas on parenting, she has an awesome sense of humor, and I admire the heck out of her (Ivy League education, became a SAHM and raised four kids--she can translate Latin and give excellent breastfeeding advice ;)). I'm not saying that I don't disagree with them or they don't get on my nerves, but overall they are great. I realize how lucky I am. DH is lucky too: he got my parents as ILs. :)

[jbowman]

I adore my ILs, especially my MIL. She and I share a lot of similar ideas on parenting, she has an awesome sense of humor, and I admire the heck out of her (Ivy League education, became a SAHM and raised four kids--she can translate Latin and give excellent breastfeeding advice ;)). I'm not saying that I don't disagree with them or they don't get on my nerves, but overall they are great. I realize how lucky I am. DH is lucky too: he got my parents as ILs. :)

[jbowman]

I adore my ILs, especially my MIL. She and I share a lot of similar ideas on parenting, she has an awesome sense of humor, and I admire the heck out of her (Ivy League education, became a SAHM and raised four kids--she can translate Latin and give excellent breastfeeding advice ;)). I'm not saying that I don't disagree with them or they don't get on my nerves, but overall they are great. I realize how lucky I am. DH is lucky too: he got my parents as ILs. :)

[jbowman]

I adore my ILs, especially my MIL. She and I share a lot of similar ideas on parenting, she has an awesome sense of humor, and I admire the heck out of her (Ivy League education, became a SAHM and raised four kids--she can translate Latin and give excellent breastfeeding advice ;)). I'm not saying that I don't disagree with them or they don't get on my nerves, but overall they are great. I realize how lucky I am. DH is lucky too: he got my parents as ILs. :)

[jbowman]

I adore my ILs, especially my MIL. She and I share a lot of similar ideas on parenting, she has an awesome sense of humor, and I admire the heck out of her (Ivy League education, became a SAHM and raised four kids--she can translate Latin and give excellent breastfeeding advice ;)). I'm not saying that I don't disagree with them or they don't get on my nerves, but overall they are great. I realize how lucky I am. DH is lucky too: he got my parents as ILs. :)

[Beth568]

Yes, I do think most of us are inclined to compare our ILs with our own parents. I think a lot of the issues that come up for all of us are due in large part to just coming from different family "cultures." By that I mean that, if you and your DH grew up in households that were very different, and you're comfortable with your upbringing, the things your ILs (and especially your MIL) do will often seem unfamiliar, strange, annoying, whatever.

I have a tough relationship with my MIL, who is one of the most self-centered people I've ever met. I struggle with big issues (like the fact that she says things to my DDs that directly undermine my parenting) and the small ones (like the fact that she does not own a dish towel, and either dries kitchen items with paper towels or simply puts them back into cabinets wet - ick).

But I love my FIL, who is a wise and gentle man, and who has always been kind to me. Of course, he couldn't live with my MIL himself, and they've been divorced for years.

And my mom and I have had our share of struggles over the years, and often still do, but I trust her completely as a grandparent and she's been nothing but supportive of my own parenting - even though I know I do some things that she wouldn't choose to do herself, especially involving our kids' religious upbringing or lack thereof. I'm comfortable leaving my kids alone with her because I know she's my ally in raising them, not a competitor. I hesitate to leave them with MIL because I know that she wants to be the fun grandma who breaks all the rules and that she wants nothing more than to be their primary confidante, KWIM?

[Beth568]

Yes, I do think most of us are inclined to compare our ILs with our own parents. I think a lot of the issues that come up for all of us are due in large part to just coming from different family "cultures." By that I mean that, if you and your DH grew up in households that were very different, and you're comfortable with your upbringing, the things your ILs (and especially your MIL) do will often seem unfamiliar, strange, annoying, whatever.

I have a tough relationship with my MIL, who is one of the most self-centered people I've ever met. I struggle with big issues (like the fact that she says things to my DDs that directly undermine my parenting) and the small ones (like the fact that she does not own a dish towel, and either dries kitchen items with paper towels or simply puts them back into cabinets wet - ick).

But I love my FIL, who is a wise and gentle man, and who has always been kind to me. Of course, he couldn't live with my MIL himself, and they've been divorced for years.

And my mom and I have had our share of struggles over the years, and often still do, but I trust her completely as a grandparent and she's been nothing but supportive of my own parenting - even though I know I do some things that she wouldn't choose to do herself, especially involving our kids' religious upbringing or lack thereof. I'm comfortable leaving my kids alone with her because I know she's my ally in raising them, not a competitor. I hesitate to leave them with MIL because I know that she wants to be the fun grandma who breaks all the rules and that she wants nothing more than to be their primary confidante, KWIM?

[Beth568]

Yes, I do think most of us are inclined to compare our ILs with our own parents. I think a lot of the issues that come up for all of us are due in large part to just coming from different family "cultures." By that I mean that, if you and your DH grew up in households that were very different, and you're comfortable with your upbringing, the things your ILs (and especially your MIL) do will often seem unfamiliar, strange, annoying, whatever.

I have a tough relationship with my MIL, who is one of the most self-centered people I've ever met. I struggle with big issues (like the fact that she says things to my DDs that directly undermine my parenting) and the small ones (like the fact that she does not own a dish towel, and either dries kitchen items with paper towels or simply puts them back into cabinets wet - ick).

But I love my FIL, who is a wise and gentle man, and who has always been kind to me. Of course, he couldn't live with my MIL himself, and they've been divorced for years.

And my mom and I have had our share of struggles over the years, and often still do, but I trust her completely as a grandparent and she's been nothing but supportive of my own parenting - even though I know I do some things that she wouldn't choose to do herself, especially involving our kids' religious upbringing or lack thereof. I'm comfortable leaving my kids alone with her because I know she's my ally in raising them, not a competitor. I hesitate to leave them with MIL because I know that she wants to be the fun grandma who breaks all the rules and that she wants nothing more than to be their primary confidante, KWIM?

[Beth568]

Yes, I do think most of us are inclined to compare our ILs with our own parents. I think a lot of the issues that come up for all of us are due in large part to just coming from different family "cultures." By that I mean that, if you and your DH grew up in households that were very different, and you're comfortable with your upbringing, the things your ILs (and especially your MIL) do will often seem unfamiliar, strange, annoying, whatever.

I have a tough relationship with my MIL, who is one of the most self-centered people I've ever met. I struggle with big issues (like the fact that she says things to my DDs that directly undermine my parenting) and the small ones (like the fact that she does not own a dish towel, and either dries kitchen items with paper towels or simply puts them back into cabinets wet - ick).

But I love my FIL, who is a wise and gentle man, and who has always been kind to me. Of course, he couldn't live with my MIL himself, and they've been divorced for years.

And my mom and I have had our share of struggles over the years, and often still do, but I trust her completely as a grandparent and she's been nothing but supportive of my own parenting - even though I know I do some things that she wouldn't choose to do herself, especially involving our kids' religious upbringing or lack thereof. I'm comfortable leaving my kids alone with her because I know she's my ally in raising them, not a competitor. I hesitate to leave them with MIL because I know that she wants to be the fun grandma who breaks all the rules and that she wants nothing more than to be their primary confidante, KWIM?

[Beth568]

Yes, I do think most of us are inclined to compare our ILs with our own parents. I think a lot of the issues that come up for all of us are due in large part to just coming from different family "cultures." By that I mean that, if you and your DH grew up in households that were very different, and you're comfortable with your upbringing, the things your ILs (and especially your MIL) do will often seem unfamiliar, strange, annoying, whatever.

I have a tough relationship with my MIL, who is one of the most self-centered people I've ever met. I struggle with big issues (like the fact that she says things to my DDs that directly undermine my parenting) and the small ones (like the fact that she does not own a dish towel, and either dries kitchen items with paper towels or simply puts them back into cabinets wet - ick).

But I love my FIL, who is a wise and gentle man, and who has always been kind to me. Of course, he couldn't live with my MIL himself, and they've been divorced for years.

And my mom and I have had our share of struggles over the years, and often still do, but I trust her completely as a grandparent and she's been nothing but supportive of my own parenting - even though I know I do some things that she wouldn't choose to do herself, especially involving our kids' religious upbringing or lack thereof. I'm comfortable leaving my kids alone with her because I know she's my ally in raising them, not a competitor. I hesitate to leave them with MIL because I know that she wants to be the fun grandma who breaks all the rules and that she wants nothing more than to be their primary confidante, KWIM?

[Beth568]

Yes, I do think most of us are inclined to compare our ILs with our own parents. I think a lot of the issues that come up for all of us are due in large part to just coming from different family "cultures." By that I mean that, if you and your DH grew up in households that were very different, and you're comfortable with your upbringing, the things your ILs (and especially your MIL) do will often seem unfamiliar, strange, annoying, whatever.

I have a tough relationship with my MIL, who is one of the most self-centered people I've ever met. I struggle with big issues (like the fact that she says things to my DDs that directly undermine my parenting) and the small ones (like the fact that she does not own a dish towel, and either dries kitchen items with paper towels or simply puts them back into cabinets wet - ick).

But I love my FIL, who is a wise and gentle man, and who has always been kind to me. Of course, he couldn't live with my MIL himself, and they've been divorced for years.

And my mom and I have had our share of struggles over the years, and often still do, but I trust her completely as a grandparent and she's been nothing but supportive of my own parenting - even though I know I do some things that she wouldn't choose to do herself, especially involving our kids' religious upbringing or lack thereof. I'm comfortable leaving my kids alone with her because I know she's my ally in raising them, not a competitor. I hesitate to leave them with MIL because I know that she wants to be the fun grandma who breaks all the rules and that she wants nothing more than to be their primary confidante, KWIM?

[Beth568]

Yes, I do think most of us are inclined to compare our ILs with our own parents. I think a lot of the issues that come up for all of us are due in large part to just coming from different family "cultures." By that I mean that, if you and your DH grew up in households that were very different, and you're comfortable with your upbringing, the things your ILs (and especially your MIL) do will often seem unfamiliar, strange, annoying, whatever.

I have a tough relationship with my MIL, who is one of the most self-centered people I've ever met. I struggle with big issues (like the fact that she says things to my DDs that directly undermine my parenting) and the small ones (like the fact that she does not own a dish towel, and either dries kitchen items with paper towels or simply puts them back into cabinets wet - ick).

But I love my FIL, who is a wise and gentle man, and who has always been kind to me. Of course, he couldn't live with my MIL himself, and they've been divorced for years.

And my mom and I have had our share of struggles over the years, and often still do, but I trust her completely as a grandparent and she's been nothing but supportive of my own parenting - even though I know I do some things that she wouldn't choose to do herself, especially involving our kids' religious upbringing or lack thereof. I'm comfortable leaving my kids alone with her because I know she's my ally in raising them, not a competitor. I hesitate to leave them with MIL because I know that she wants to be the fun grandma who breaks all the rules and that she wants nothing more than to be their primary confidante, KWIM?

[Beth568]

Yes, I do think most of us are inclined to compare our ILs with our own parents. I think a lot of the issues that come up for all of us are due in large part to just coming from different family "cultures." By that I mean that, if you and your DH grew up in households that were very different, and you're comfortable with your upbringing, the things your ILs (and especially your MIL) do will often seem unfamiliar, strange, annoying, whatever.

I have a tough relationship with my MIL, who is one of the most self-centered people I've ever met. I struggle with big issues (like the fact that she says things to my DDs that directly undermine my parenting) and the small ones (like the fact that she does not own a dish towel, and either dries kitchen items with paper towels or simply puts them back into cabinets wet - ick).

But I love my FIL, who is a wise and gentle man, and who has always been kind to me. Of course, he couldn't live with my MIL himself, and they've been divorced for years.

And my mom and I have had our share of struggles over the years, and often still do, but I trust her completely as a grandparent and she's been nothing but supportive of my own parenting - even though I know I do some things that she wouldn't choose to do herself, especially involving our kids' religious upbringing or lack thereof. I'm comfortable leaving my kids alone with her because I know she's my ally in raising them, not a competitor. I hesitate to leave them with MIL because I know that she wants to be the fun grandma who breaks all the rules and that she wants nothing more than to be their primary confidante, KWIM?

[Beth568]

Yes, I do think most of us are inclined to compare our ILs with our own parents. I think a lot of the issues that come up for all of us are due in large part to just coming from different family "cultures." By that I mean that, if you and your DH grew up in households that were very different, and you're comfortable with your upbringing, the things your ILs (and especially your MIL) do will often seem unfamiliar, strange, annoying, whatever.

I have a tough relationship with my MIL, who is one of the most self-centered people I've ever met. I struggle with big issues (like the fact that she says things to my DDs that directly undermine my parenting) and the small ones (like the fact that she does not own a dish towel, and either dries kitchen items with paper towels or simply puts them back into cabinets wet - ick).

But I love my FIL, who is a wise and gentle man, and who has always been kind to me. Of course, he couldn't live with my MIL himself, and they've been divorced for years.

And my mom and I have had our share of struggles over the years, and often still do, but I trust her completely as a grandparent and she's been nothing but supportive of my own parenting - even though I know I do some things that she wouldn't choose to do herself, especially involving our kids' religious upbringing or lack thereof. I'm comfortable leaving my kids alone with her because I know she's my ally in raising them, not a competitor. I hesitate to leave them with MIL because I know that she wants to be the fun grandma who breaks all the rules and that she wants nothing more than to be their primary confidante, KWIM?

[JBaxter]

I have great IL's very respectfull not pushy or nosey. They live in California and we live in Maryland LOL

[JBaxter]

I have great IL's very respectfull not pushy or nosey. They live in California and we live in Maryland LOL

[JBaxter]

I have great IL's very respectfull not pushy or nosey. They live in California and we live in Maryland LOL

[JBaxter]

I have great IL's very respectfull not pushy or nosey. They live in California and we live in Maryland LOL

[JBaxter]

I have great IL's very respectfull not pushy or nosey. They live in California and we live in Maryland LOL

[JBaxter]

I have great IL's very respectfull not pushy or nosey. They live in California and we live in Maryland LOL

[JBaxter]

I have great IL's very respectfull not pushy or nosey. They live in California and we live in Maryland LOL

[JBaxter]

I have great IL's very respectfull not pushy or nosey. They live in California and we live in Maryland LOL

[JBaxter]

I have great IL's very respectfull not pushy or nosey. They live in California and we live in Maryland LOL

[MayB]

I love my ILs, especially my MIL, she's a great lady. She respects me and my parenting and has even taken my side on occasion when DH and I disagree. She's also a wonderful grandmother to my children and very generous. An added bonus is that she has wonderful fashion sense, which spills over into her gift giving (like Brighton jewelry and Vera Bradley and Coach handbags).

I have to add that I an amazing relationship with my parents as well so I'm doubly blessed.

[MayB]

I love my ILs, especially my MIL, she's a great lady. She respects me and my parenting and has even taken my side on occasion when DH and I disagree. She's also a wonderful grandmother to my children and very generous. An added bonus is that she has wonderful fashion sense, which spills over into her gift giving (like Brighton jewelry and Vera Bradley and Coach handbags).

I have to add that I an amazing relationship with my parents as well so I'm doubly blessed.

[MayB]

I love my ILs, especially my MIL, she's a great lady. She respects me and my parenting and has even taken my side on occasion when DH and I disagree. She's also a wonderful grandmother to my children and very generous. An added bonus is that she has wonderful fashion sense, which spills over into her gift giving (like Brighton jewelry and Vera Bradley and Coach handbags).

I have to add that I an amazing relationship with my parents as well so I'm doubly blessed.

[MayB]

I love my ILs, especially my MIL, she's a great lady. She respects me and my parenting and has even taken my side on occasion when DH and I disagree. She's also a wonderful grandmother to my children and very generous. An added bonus is that she has wonderful fashion sense, which spills over into her gift giving (like Brighton jewelry and Vera Bradley and Coach handbags).

I have to add that I an amazing relationship with my parents as well so I'm doubly blessed.

[MayB]

I love my ILs, especially my MIL, she's a great lady. She respects me and my parenting and has even taken my side on occasion when DH and I disagree. She's also a wonderful grandmother to my children and very generous. An added bonus is that she has wonderful fashion sense, which spills over into her gift giving (like Brighton jewelry and Vera Bradley and Coach handbags).

I have to add that I an amazing relationship with my parents as well so I'm doubly blessed.

[MayB]

I love my ILs, especially my MIL, she's a great lady. She respects me and my parenting and has even taken my side on occasion when DH and I disagree. She's also a wonderful grandmother to my children and very generous. An added bonus is that she has wonderful fashion sense, which spills over into her gift giving (like Brighton jewelry and Vera Bradley and Coach handbags).

I have to add that I an amazing relationship with my parents as well so I'm doubly blessed.

[MayB]

I love my ILs, especially my MIL, she's a great lady. She respects me and my parenting and has even taken my side on occasion when DH and I disagree. She's also a wonderful grandmother to my children and very generous. An added bonus is that she has wonderful fashion sense, which spills over into her gift giving (like Brighton jewelry and Vera Bradley and Coach handbags).

I have to add that I an amazing relationship with my parents as well so I'm doubly blessed.

[MayB]

I love my ILs, especially my MIL, she's a great lady. She respects me and my parenting and has even taken my side on occasion when DH and I disagree. She's also a wonderful grandmother to my children and very generous. An added bonus is that she has wonderful fashion sense, which spills over into her gift giving (like Brighton jewelry and Vera Bradley and Coach handbags).

I have to add that I an amazing relationship with my parents as well so I'm doubly blessed.

[MayB]

I love my ILs, especially my MIL, she's a great lady. She respects me and my parenting and has even taken my side on occasion when DH and I disagree. She's also a wonderful grandmother to my children and very generous. An added bonus is that she has wonderful fashion sense, which spills over into her gift giving (like Brighton jewelry and Vera Bradley and Coach handbags).

I have to add that I an amazing relationship with my parents as well so I'm doubly blessed.

[nfowife]

I adore my IL's. My family is not so great and they are like the parents I wish I always had. I'm very lucky! I'm especially close to MIL (we have even taken vacations just the 2 of us!), she's one of my closest friends and we talk daily, if not more than once a day. They are just wonderful parents and people and they really respect DH and I as parents and our choices as well. I feel very fortunate to have them in my life!

[nfowife]

I adore my IL's. My family is not so great and they are like the parents I wish I always had. I'm very lucky! I'm especially close to MIL (we have even taken vacations just the 2 of us!), she's one of my closest friends and we talk daily, if not more than once a day. They are just wonderful parents and people and they really respect DH and I as parents and our choices as well. I feel very fortunate to have them in my life!

[nfowife]

I adore my IL's. My family is not so great and they are like the parents I wish I always had. I'm very lucky! I'm especially close to MIL (we have even taken vacations just the 2 of us!), she's one of my closest friends and we talk daily, if not more than once a day. They are just wonderful parents and people and they really respect DH and I as parents and our choices as well. I feel very fortunate to have them in my life!

[nfowife]

I adore my IL's. My family is not so great and they are like the parents I wish I always had. I'm very lucky! I'm especially close to MIL (we have even taken vacations just the 2 of us!), she's one of my closest friends and we talk daily, if not more than once a day. They are just wonderful parents and people and they really respect DH and I as parents and our choices as well. I feel very fortunate to have them in my life!

[nfowife]

I adore my IL's. My family is not so great and they are like the parents I wish I always had. I'm very lucky! I'm especially close to MIL (we have even taken vacations just the 2 of us!), she's one of my closest friends and we talk daily, if not more than once a day. They are just wonderful parents and people and they really respect DH and I as parents and our choices as well. I feel very fortunate to have them in my life!

[nfowife]

I adore my IL's. My family is not so great and they are like the parents I wish I always had. I'm very lucky! I'm especially close to MIL (we have even taken vacations just the 2 of us!), she's one of my closest friends and we talk daily, if not more than once a day. They are just wonderful parents and people and they really respect DH and I as parents and our choices as well. I feel very fortunate to have them in my life!

[nfowife]

I adore my IL's. My family is not so great and they are like the parents I wish I always had. I'm very lucky! I'm especially close to MIL (we have even taken vacations just the 2 of us!), she's one of my closest friends and we talk daily, if not more than once a day. They are just wonderful parents and people and they really respect DH and I as parents and our choices as well. I feel very fortunate to have them in my life!

[nfowife]

I adore my IL's. My family is not so great and they are like the parents I wish I always had. I'm very lucky! I'm especially close to MIL (we have even taken vacations just the 2 of us!), she's one of my closest friends and we talk daily, if not more than once a day. They are just wonderful parents and people and they really respect DH and I as parents and our choices as well. I feel very fortunate to have them in my life!

[nfowife]

I adore my IL's. My family is not so great and they are like the parents I wish I always had. I'm very lucky! I'm especially close to MIL (we have even taken vacations just the 2 of us!), she's one of my closest friends and we talk daily, if not more than once a day. They are just wonderful parents and people and they really respect DH and I as parents and our choices as well. I feel very fortunate to have them in my life!

[ChefGirl]

You ladies got really lucky with your IL'S. The gifts I get from my MIL are mostly from dollar stores or just crappy junk. My MIL is very self-centered and self-absorbed. She has no fashion sense whatsoever. I often asked DH how he turned out so differently than his parents and his sister. He said it's mostly due to the friends he has made in college. DH is so different from his family, on every aspect. He's lucky that he has my parents as IL's.

[ChefGirl]

You ladies got really lucky with your IL'S. The gifts I get from my MIL are mostly from dollar stores or just crappy junk. My MIL is very self-centered and self-absorbed. She has no fashion sense whatsoever. I often asked DH how he turned out so differently than his parents and his sister. He said it's mostly due to the friends he has made in college. DH is so different from his family, on every aspect. He's lucky that he has my parents as IL's.

[ChefGirl]

You ladies got really lucky with your IL'S. The gifts I get from my MIL are mostly from dollar stores or just crappy junk. My MIL is very self-centered and self-absorbed. She has no fashion sense whatsoever. I often asked DH how he turned out so differently than his parents and his sister. He said it's mostly due to the friends he has made in college. DH is so different from his family, on every aspect. He's lucky that he has my parents as IL's.

[ChefGirl]

You ladies got really lucky with your IL'S. The gifts I get from my MIL are mostly from dollar stores or just crappy junk. My MIL is very self-centered and self-absorbed. She has no fashion sense whatsoever. I often asked DH how he turned out so differently than his parents and his sister. He said it's mostly due to the friends he has made in college. DH is so different from his family, on every aspect. He's lucky that he has my parents as IL's.

[ChefGirl]

You ladies got really lucky with your IL'S. The gifts I get from my MIL are mostly from dollar stores or just crappy junk. My MIL is very self-centered and self-absorbed. She has no fashion sense whatsoever. I often asked DH how he turned out so differently than his parents and his sister. He said it's mostly due to the friends he has made in college. DH is so different from his family, on every aspect. He's lucky that he has my parents as IL's.

[ChefGirl]

You ladies got really lucky with your IL'S. The gifts I get from my MIL are mostly from dollar stores or just crappy junk. My MIL is very self-centered and self-absorbed. She has no fashion sense whatsoever. I often asked DH how he turned out so differently than his parents and his sister. He said it's mostly due to the friends he has made in college. DH is so different from his family, on every aspect. He's lucky that he has my parents as IL's.

[ChefGirl]

You ladies got really lucky with your IL'S. The gifts I get from my MIL are mostly from dollar stores or just crappy junk. My MIL is very self-centered and self-absorbed. She has no fashion sense whatsoever. I often asked DH how he turned out so differently than his parents and his sister. He said it's mostly due to the friends he has made in college. DH is so different from his family, on every aspect. He's lucky that he has my parents as IL's.

[ChefGirl]

You ladies got really lucky with your IL'S. The gifts I get from my MIL are mostly from dollar stores or just crappy junk. My MIL is very self-centered and self-absorbed. She has no fashion sense whatsoever. I often asked DH how he turned out so differently than his parents and his sister. He said it's mostly due to the friends he has made in college. DH is so different from his family, on every aspect. He's lucky that he has my parents as IL's.

[ChefGirl]

You ladies got really lucky with your IL'S. The gifts I get from my MIL are mostly from dollar stores or just crappy junk. My MIL is very self-centered and self-absorbed. She has no fashion sense whatsoever. I often asked DH how he turned out so differently than his parents and his sister. He said it's mostly due to the friends he has made in college. DH is so different from his family, on every aspect. He's lucky that he has my parents as IL's.

[jarrettsmom9705]

I love my IL's. They are generous, considerate, loving, but at the same time, give you space and aren't overbearing. My MIL is always sending my DS little surprises in the mail (they live in VA, we live in FL) and sews him little outfits and made all of his nursery linens. When they have come to visit, they insist on staying at a hotel so that they won't impose on us (not that they would). They are the type of parents who you know care about us, but don't call everyday or try to nose into every little detail of our lives.

Totally different from my parents. My mom is the kind who always has to have a drama going on. She always has her two cents and hates it when you disagree or don't take her advice. She is always pulling guilt trips and constantly makes disparaging comments about parenting decisions that DH and I make. Good thing she lives 2 hours away and can't visit but about once every two weeks. My dad, on the other hand, is a great guy, but loses interest in DS after a short period of time. He, too, teases me about things like making my own baby food and not allowing DS to have things like sugar, sweets, junky food, etc. I love them, but sometimes they drive me crazy.

Tracy

[jarrettsmom9705]

I love my IL's. They are generous, considerate, loving, but at the same time, give you space and aren't overbearing. My MIL is always sending my DS little surprises in the mail (they live in VA, we live in FL) and sews him little outfits and made all of his nursery linens. When they have come to visit, they insist on staying at a hotel so that they won't impose on us (not that they would). They are the type of parents who you know care about us, but don't call everyday or try to nose into every little detail of our lives.

Totally different from my parents. My mom is the kind who always has to have a drama going on. She always has her two cents and hates it when you disagree or don't take her advice. She is always pulling guilt trips and constantly makes disparaging comments about parenting decisions that DH and I make. Good thing she lives 2 hours away and can't visit but about once every two weeks. My dad, on the other hand, is a great guy, but loses interest in DS after a short period of time. He, too, teases me about things like making my own baby food and not allowing DS to have things like sugar, sweets, junky food, etc. I love them, but sometimes they drive me crazy.

Tracy

[jarrettsmom9705]

I love my IL's. They are generous, considerate, loving, but at the same time, give you space and aren't overbearing. My MIL is always sending my DS little surprises in the mail (they live in VA, we live in FL) and sews him little outfits and made all of his nursery linens. When they have come to visit, they insist on staying at a hotel so that they won't impose on us (not that they would). They are the type of parents who you know care about us, but don't call everyday or try to nose into every little detail of our lives.

Totally different from my parents. My mom is the kind who always has to have a drama going on. She always has her two cents and hates it when you disagree or don't take her advice. She is always pulling guilt trips and constantly makes disparaging comments about parenting decisions that DH and I make. Good thing she lives 2 hours away and can't visit but about once every two weeks. My dad, on the other hand, is a great guy, but loses interest in DS after a short period of time. He, too, teases me about things like making my own baby food and not allowing DS to have things like sugar, sweets, junky food, etc. I love them, but sometimes they drive me crazy.

Tracy

[jarrettsmom9705]

I love my IL's. They are generous, considerate, loving, but at the same time, give you space and aren't overbearing. My MIL is always sending my DS little surprises in the mail (they live in VA, we live in FL) and sews him little outfits and made all of his nursery linens. When they have come to visit, they insist on staying at a hotel so that they won't impose on us (not that they would). They are the type of parents who you know care about us, but don't call everyday or try to nose into every little detail of our lives.

Totally different from my parents. My mom is the kind who always has to have a drama going on. She always has her two cents and hates it when you disagree or don't take her advice. She is always pulling guilt trips and constantly makes disparaging comments about parenting decisions that DH and I make. Good thing she lives 2 hours away and can't visit but about once every two weeks. My dad, on the other hand, is a great guy, but loses interest in DS after a short period of time. He, too, teases me about things like making my own baby food and not allowing DS to have things like sugar, sweets, junky food, etc. I love them, but sometimes they drive me crazy.

Tracy

[jarrettsmom9705]

I love my IL's. They are generous, considerate, loving, but at the same time, give you space and aren't overbearing. My MIL is always sending my DS little surprises in the mail (they live in VA, we live in FL) and sews him little outfits and made all of his nursery linens. When they have come to visit, they insist on staying at a hotel so that they won't impose on us (not that they would). They are the type of parents who you know care about us, but don't call everyday or try to nose into every little detail of our lives.

Totally different from my parents. My mom is the kind who always has to have a drama going on. She always has her two cents and hates it when you disagree or don't take her advice. She is always pulling guilt trips and constantly makes disparaging comments about parenting decisions that DH and I make. Good thing she lives 2 hours away and can't visit but about once every two weeks. My dad, on the other hand, is a great guy, but loses interest in DS after a short period of time. He, too, teases me about things like making my own baby food and not allowing DS to have things like sugar, sweets, junky food, etc. I love them, but sometimes they drive me crazy.

Tracy

[jarrettsmom9705]

I love my IL's. They are generous, considerate, loving, but at the same time, give you space and aren't overbearing. My MIL is always sending my DS little surprises in the mail (they live in VA, we live in FL) and sews him little outfits and made all of his nursery linens. When they have come to visit, they insist on staying at a hotel so that they won't impose on us (not that they would). They are the type of parents who you know care about us, but don't call everyday or try to nose into every little detail of our lives.

Totally different from my parents. My mom is the kind who always has to have a drama going on. She always has her two cents and hates it when you disagree or don't take her advice. She is always pulling guilt trips and constantly makes disparaging comments about parenting decisions that DH and I make. Good thing she lives 2 hours away and can't visit but about once every two weeks. My dad, on the other hand, is a great guy, but loses interest in DS after a short period of time. He, too, teases me about things like making my own baby food and not allowing DS to have things like sugar, sweets, junky food, etc. I love them, but sometimes they drive me crazy.

Tracy

[jarrettsmom9705]

I love my IL's. They are generous, considerate, loving, but at the same time, give you space and aren't overbearing. My MIL is always sending my DS little surprises in the mail (they live in VA, we live in FL) and sews him little outfits and made all of his nursery linens. When they have come to visit, they insist on staying at a hotel so that they won't impose on us (not that they would). They are the type of parents who you know care about us, but don't call everyday or try to nose into every little detail of our lives.

Totally different from my parents. My mom is the kind who always has to have a drama going on. She always has her two cents and hates it when you disagree or don't take her advice. She is always pulling guilt trips and constantly makes disparaging comments about parenting decisions that DH and I make. Good thing she lives 2 hours away and can't visit but about once every two weeks. My dad, on the other hand, is a great guy, but loses interest in DS after a short period of time. He, too, teases me about things like making my own baby food and not allowing DS to have things like sugar, sweets, junky food, etc. I love them, but sometimes they drive me crazy.

Tracy

[jarrettsmom9705]

I love my IL's. They are generous, considerate, loving, but at the same time, give you space and aren't overbearing. My MIL is always sending my DS little surprises in the mail (they live in VA, we live in FL) and sews him little outfits and made all of his nursery linens. When they have come to visit, they insist on staying at a hotel so that they won't impose on us (not that they would). They are the type of parents who you know care about us, but don't call everyday or try to nose into every little detail of our lives.

Totally different from my parents. My mom is the kind who always has to have a drama going on. She always has her two cents and hates it when you disagree or don't take her advice. She is always pulling guilt trips and constantly makes disparaging comments about parenting decisions that DH and I make. Good thing she lives 2 hours away and can't visit but about once every two weeks. My dad, on the other hand, is a great guy, but loses interest in DS after a short period of time. He, too, teases me about things like making my own baby food and not allowing DS to have things like sugar, sweets, junky food, etc. I love them, but sometimes they drive me crazy.

Tracy

[jarrettsmom9705]

I love my IL's. They are generous, considerate, loving, but at the same time, give you space and aren't overbearing. My MIL is always sending my DS little surprises in the mail (they live in VA, we live in FL) and sews him little outfits and made all of his nursery linens. When they have come to visit, they insist on staying at a hotel so that they won't impose on us (not that they would). They are the type of parents who you know care about us, but don't call everyday or try to nose into every little detail of our lives.

Totally different from my parents. My mom is the kind who always has to have a drama going on. She always has her two cents and hates it when you disagree or don't take her advice. She is always pulling guilt trips and constantly makes disparaging comments about parenting decisions that DH and I make. Good thing she lives 2 hours away and can't visit but about once every two weeks. My dad, on the other hand, is a great guy, but loses interest in DS after a short period of time. He, too, teases me about things like making my own baby food and not allowing DS to have things like sugar, sweets, junky food, etc. I love them, but sometimes they drive me crazy.

Tracy

[babystuffbuff]

In general, I like my in-laws very much. I know I got very, very lucky, both to have ILs that I don't hate, and also to have pretty wonderful BILs and SILs as well.

Top things I like about the ILs:

1. They are super grandparents. I have never, ever seen either one of them question a parenting decision made by my SILs and BILs. They go along with the rules/decisions that the child's PARENT makes. I think that is *huge* and it makes me feel confident that they will follow the rules I set down for my kids in the future. I know I won't be that lucky with my mom. :P

2. They are incredibly supportive of all their children. Whenever DH calls them with good news, no matter how big or small, you would think that he gave them the moon with a rope around it. "That's GREAT" are always the first words out of their mouths. Whatever any of their kids do is extraordinary. :)

A few annoying niggles:

1. MIL likes to videotape EVERYTHING and take a million pictures of EVERYTHING. As someone who dislikes being filmed and having my picture taken, this grates on me. The biggest issue I had was when I expressly and repeatedly said that I did not want my wedding videotaped. I hammered away at that point, over and over, for the entire 18 months we were engaged. Do we have the whole thing on film anyway? You betcha.

2. They like to overschedule. Now, I understand that their kids all live in different parts of the country, and it's not often that we are all together. However, whenever we are all in the same place, we have to do a million things everyday. If we are near ILs house ("home" for DH and his sibs) it's even worse; there is a long, long list of people to visit, graduation parties and christenings to attend, etc. I know she likes to show off her family, but it can be exhausting.

All in all, I figure I'm pretty fortunate. :)

Sarah

Auntie to my seven munchkins, and thinking about TTC a munchkin of our own :)

[babystuffbuff]

In general, I like my in-laws very much. I know I got very, very lucky, both to have ILs that I don't hate, and also to have pretty wonderful BILs and SILs as well.

Top things I like about the ILs:

1. They are super grandparents. I have never, ever seen either one of them question a parenting decision made by my SILs and BILs. They go along with the rules/decisions that the child's PARENT makes. I think that is *huge* and it makes me feel confident that they will follow the rules I set down for my kids in the future. I know I won't be that lucky with my mom. :P

2. They are incredibly supportive of all their children. Whenever DH calls them with good news, no matter how big or small, you would think that he gave them the moon with a rope around it. "That's GREAT" are always the first words out of their mouths. Whatever any of their kids do is extraordinary. :)

A few annoying niggles:

1. MIL likes to videotape EVERYTHING and take a million pictures of EVERYTHING. As someone who dislikes being filmed and having my picture taken, this grates on me. The biggest issue I had was when I expressly and repeatedly said that I did not want my wedding videotaped. I hammered away at that point, over and over, for the entire 18 months we were engaged. Do we have the whole thing on film anyway? You betcha.

2. They like to overschedule. Now, I understand that their kids all live in different parts of the country, and it's not often that we are all together. However, whenever we are all in the same place, we have to do a million things everyday. If we are near ILs house ("home" for DH and his sibs) it's even worse; there is a long, long list of people to visit, graduation parties and christenings to attend, etc. I know she likes to show off her family, but it can be exhausting.

All in all, I figure I'm pretty fortunate. :)

Sarah

Auntie to my seven munchkins, and thinking about TTC a munchkin of our own :)

[babystuffbuff]

In general, I like my in-laws very much. I know I got very, very lucky, both to have ILs that I don't hate, and also to have pretty wonderful BILs and SILs as well.

Top things I like about the ILs:

1. They are super grandparents. I have never, ever seen either one of them question a parenting decision made by my SILs and BILs. They go along with the rules/decisions that the child's PARENT makes. I think that is *huge* and it makes me feel confident that they will follow the rules I set down for my kids in the future. I know I won't be that lucky with my mom. :P

2. They are incredibly supportive of all their children. Whenever DH calls them with good news, no matter how big or small, you would think that he gave them the moon with a rope around it. "That's GREAT" are always the first words out of their mouths. Whatever any of their kids do is extraordinary. :)

A few annoying niggles:

1. MIL likes to videotape EVERYTHING and take a million pictures of EVERYTHING. As someone who dislikes being filmed and having my picture taken, this grates on me. The biggest issue I had was when I expressly and repeatedly said that I did not want my wedding videotaped. I hammered away at that point, over and over, for the entire 18 months we were engaged. Do we have the whole thing on film anyway? You betcha.

2. They like to overschedule. Now, I understand that their kids all live in different parts of the country, and it's not often that we are all together. However, whenever we are all in the same place, we have to do a million things everyday. If we are near ILs house ("home" for DH and his sibs) it's even worse; there is a long, long list of people to visit, graduation parties and christenings to attend, etc. I know she likes to show off her family, but it can be exhausting.

All in all, I figure I'm pretty fortunate. :)

Sarah

Auntie to my seven munchkins, and thinking about TTC a munchkin of our own :)

[babystuffbuff]

In general, I like my in-laws very much. I know I got very, very lucky, both to have ILs that I don't hate, and also to have pretty wonderful BILs and SILs as well.

Top things I like about the ILs:

1. They are super grandparents. I have never, ever seen either one of them question a parenting decision made by my SILs and BILs. They go along with the rules/decisions that the child's PARENT makes. I think that is *huge* and it makes me feel confident that they will follow the rules I set down for my kids in the future. I know I won't be that lucky with my mom. :P

2. They are incredibly supportive of all their children. Whenever DH calls them with good news, no matter how big or small, you would think that he gave them the moon with a rope around it. "That's GREAT" are always the first words out of their mouths. Whatever any of their kids do is extraordinary. :)

A few annoying niggles:

1. MIL likes to videotape EVERYTHING and take a million pictures of EVERYTHING. As someone who dislikes being filmed and having my picture taken, this grates on me. The biggest issue I had was when I expressly and repeatedly said that I did not want my wedding videotaped. I hammered away at that point, over and over, for the entire 18 months we were engaged. Do we have the whole thing on film anyway? You betcha.

2. They like to overschedule. Now, I understand that their kids all live in different parts of the country, and it's not often that we are all together. However, whenever we are all in the same place, we have to do a million things everyday. If we are near ILs house ("home" for DH and his sibs) it's even worse; there is a long, long list of people to visit, graduation parties and christenings to attend, etc. I know she likes to show off her family, but it can be exhausting.

All in all, I figure I'm pretty fortunate. :)

Sarah

Auntie to my seven munchkins, and thinking about TTC a munchkin of our own :)

[babystuffbuff]

In general, I like my in-laws very much. I know I got very, very lucky, both to have ILs that I don't hate, and also to have pretty wonderful BILs and SILs as well.

Top things I like about the ILs:

1. They are super grandparents. I have never, ever seen either one of them question a parenting decision made by my SILs and BILs. They go along with the rules/decisions that the child's PARENT makes. I think that is *huge* and it makes me feel confident that they will follow the rules I set down for my kids in the future. I know I won't be that lucky with my mom. :P

2. They are incredibly supportive of all their children. Whenever DH calls them with good news, no matter how big or small, you would think that he gave them the moon with a rope around it. "That's GREAT" are always the first words out of their mouths. Whatever any of their kids do is extraordinary. :)

A few annoying niggles:

1. MIL likes to videotape EVERYTHING and take a million pictures of EVERYTHING. As someone who dislikes being filmed and having my picture taken, this grates on me. The biggest issue I had was when I expressly and repeatedly said that I did not want my wedding videotaped. I hammered away at that point, over and over, for the entire 18 months we were engaged. Do we have the whole thing on film anyway? You betcha.

2. They like to overschedule. Now, I understand that their kids all live in different parts of the country, and it's not often that we are all together. However, whenever we are all in the same place, we have to do a million things everyday. If we are near ILs house ("home" for DH and his sibs) it's even worse; there is a long, long list of people to visit, graduation parties and christenings to attend, etc. I know she likes to show off her family, but it can be exhausting.

All in all, I figure I'm pretty fortunate. :)

Sarah

Auntie to my seven munchkins, and thinking about TTC a munchkin of our own :)

[babystuffbuff]

In general, I like my in-laws very much. I know I got very, very lucky, both to have ILs that I don't hate, and also to have pretty wonderful BILs and SILs as well.

Top things I like about the ILs:

1. They are super grandparents. I have never, ever seen either one of them question a parenting decision made by my SILs and BILs. They go along with the rules/decisions that the child's PARENT makes. I think that is *huge* and it makes me feel confident that they will follow the rules I set down for my kids in the future. I know I won't be that lucky with my mom. :P

2. They are incredibly supportive of all their children. Whenever DH calls them with good news, no matter how big or small, you would think that he gave them the moon with a rope around it. "That's GREAT" are always the first words out of their mouths. Whatever any of their kids do is extraordinary. :)

A few annoying niggles:

1. MIL likes to videotape EVERYTHING and take a million pictures of EVERYTHING. As someone who dislikes being filmed and having my picture taken, this grates on me. The biggest issue I had was when I expressly and repeatedly said that I did not want my wedding videotaped. I hammered away at that point, over and over, for the entire 18 months we were engaged. Do we have the whole thing on film anyway? You betcha.

2. They like to overschedule. Now, I understand that their kids all live in different parts of the country, and it's not often that we are all together. However, whenever we are all in the same place, we have to do a million things everyday. If we are near ILs house ("home" for DH and his sibs) it's even worse; there is a long, long list of people to visit, graduation parties and christenings to attend, etc. I know she likes to show off her family, but it can be exhausting.

All in all, I figure I'm pretty fortunate. :)

Sarah

Auntie to my seven munchkins, and thinking about TTC a munchkin of our own :)

[babystuffbuff]

In general, I like my in-laws very much. I know I got very, very lucky, both to have ILs that I don't hate, and also to have pretty wonderful BILs and SILs as well.

Top things I like about the ILs:

1. They are super grandparents. I have never, ever seen either one of them question a parenting decision made by my SILs and BILs. They go along with the rules/decisions that the child's PARENT makes. I think that is *huge* and it makes me feel confident that they will follow the rules I set down for my kids in the future. I know I won't be that lucky with my mom. :P

2. They are incredibly supportive of all their children. Whenever DH calls them with good news, no matter how big or small, you would think that he gave them the moon with a rope around it. "That's GREAT" are always the first words out of their mouths. Whatever any of their kids do is extraordinary. :)

A few annoying niggles:

1. MIL likes to videotape EVERYTHING and take a million pictures of EVERYTHING. As someone who dislikes being filmed and having my picture taken, this grates on me. The biggest issue I had was when I expressly and repeatedly said that I did not want my wedding videotaped. I hammered away at that point, over and over, for the entire 18 months we were engaged. Do we have the whole thing on film anyway? You betcha.

2. They like to overschedule. Now, I understand that their kids all live in different parts of the country, and it's not often that we are all together. However, whenever we are all in the same place, we have to do a million things everyday. If we are near ILs house ("home" for DH and his sibs) it's even worse; there is a long, long list of people to visit, graduation parties and christenings to attend, etc. I know she likes to show off her family, but it can be exhausting.

All in all, I figure I'm pretty fortunate. :)

Sarah

Auntie to my seven munchkins, and thinking about TTC a munchkin of our own :)

[babystuffbuff]

In general, I like my in-laws very much. I know I got very, very lucky, both to have ILs that I don't hate, and also to have pretty wonderful BILs and SILs as well.

Top things I like about the ILs:

1. They are super grandparents. I have never, ever seen either one of them question a parenting decision made by my SILs and BILs. They go along with the rules/decisions that the child's PARENT makes. I think that is *huge* and it makes me feel confident that they will follow the rules I set down for my kids in the future. I know I won't be that lucky with my mom. :P

2. They are incredibly supportive of all their children. Whenever DH calls them with good news, no matter how big or small, you would think that he gave them the moon with a rope around it. "That's GREAT" are always the first words out of their mouths. Whatever any of their kids do is extraordinary. :)

A few annoying niggles:

1. MIL likes to videotape EVERYTHING and take a million pictures of EVERYTHING. As someone who dislikes being filmed and having my picture taken, this grates on me. The biggest issue I had was when I expressly and repeatedly said that I did not want my wedding videotaped. I hammered away at that point, over and over, for the entire 18 months we were engaged. Do we have the whole thing on film anyway? You betcha.

2. They like to overschedule. Now, I understand that their kids all live in different parts of the country, and it's not often that we are all together. However, whenever we are all in the same place, we have to do a million things everyday. If we are near ILs house ("home" for DH and his sibs) it's even worse; there is a long, long list of people to visit, graduation parties and christenings to attend, etc. I know she likes to show off her family, but it can be exhausting.

All in all, I figure I'm pretty fortunate. :)

Sarah

Auntie to my seven munchkins, and thinking about TTC a munchkin of our own :)

[babystuffbuff]

In general, I like my in-laws very much. I know I got very, very lucky, both to have ILs that I don't hate, and also to have pretty wonderful BILs and SILs as well.

Top things I like about the ILs:

1. They are super grandparents. I have never, ever seen either one of them question a parenting decision made by my SILs and BILs. They go along with the rules/decisions that the child's PARENT makes. I think that is *huge* and it makes me feel confident that they will follow the rules I set down for my kids in the future. I know I won't be that lucky with my mom. :P

2. They are incredibly supportive of all their children. Whenever DH calls them with good news, no matter how big or small, you would think that he gave them the moon with a rope around it. "That's GREAT" are always the first words out of their mouths. Whatever any of their kids do is extraordinary. :)

A few annoying niggles:

1. MIL likes to videotape EVERYTHING and take a million pictures of EVERYTHING. As someone who dislikes being filmed and having my picture taken, this grates on me. The biggest issue I had was when I expressly and repeatedly said that I did not want my wedding videotaped. I hammered away at that point, over and over, for the entire 18 months we were engaged. Do we have the whole thing on film anyway? You betcha.

2. They like to overschedule. Now, I understand that their kids all live in different parts of the country, and it's not often that we are all together. However, whenever we are all in the same place, we have to do a million things everyday. If we are near ILs house ("home" for DH and his sibs) it's even worse; there is a long, long list of people to visit, graduation parties and christenings to attend, etc. I know she likes to show off her family, but it can be exhausting.

All in all, I figure I'm pretty fortunate. :)

Sarah

Auntie to my seven munchkins, and thinking about TTC a munchkin of our own :)

[lisams]

Fortunately I really like my ILs. There are a few minor things that bug me, but they're things I can overlook. I've actually learned a lot through getting to know them. I like how they are involved in DD's life but don't overdo it.

[lisams]

Fortunately I really like my ILs. There are a few minor things that bug me, but they're things I can overlook. I've actually learned a lot through getting to know them. I like how they are involved in DD's life but don't overdo it.

[lisams]

Fortunately I really like my ILs. There are a few minor things that bug me, but they're things I can overlook. I've actually learned a lot through getting to know them. I like how they are involved in DD's life but don't overdo it.

[lisams]

Fortunately I really like my ILs. There are a few minor things that bug me, but they're things I can overlook. I've actually learned a lot through getting to know them. I like how they are involved in DD's life but don't overdo it.

[lisams]

Fortunately I really like my ILs. There are a few minor things that bug me, but they're things I can overlook. I've actually learned a lot through getting to know them. I like how they are involved in DD's life but don't overdo it.

[lisams]

Fortunately I really like my ILs. There are a few minor things that bug me, but they're things I can overlook. I've actually learned a lot through getting to know them. I like how they are involved in DD's life but don't overdo it.

[lisams]

Fortunately I really like my ILs. There are a few minor things that bug me, but they're things I can overlook. I've actually learned a lot through getting to know them. I like how they are involved in DD's life but don't overdo it.

[lisams]

Fortunately I really like my ILs. There are a few minor things that bug me, but they're things I can overlook. I've actually learned a lot through getting to know them. I like how they are involved in DD's life but don't overdo it.

[lisams]

Fortunately I really like my ILs. There are a few minor things that bug me, but they're things I can overlook. I've actually learned a lot through getting to know them. I like how they are involved in DD's life but don't overdo it.

[new_mommy25]

LOVE my in-laws. I would let MIL watch the kids over my own mom any day. My mom is great but she lacks in patience and energy.

[new_mommy25]

LOVE my in-laws. I would let MIL watch the kids over my own mom any day. My mom is great but she lacks in patience and energy.

[new_mommy25]

LOVE my in-laws. I would let MIL watch the kids over my own mom any day. My mom is great but she lacks in patience and energy.

[new_mommy25]

LOVE my in-laws. I would let MIL watch the kids over my own mom any day. My mom is great but she lacks in patience and energy.

[new_mommy25]

LOVE my in-laws. I would let MIL watch the kids over my own mom any day. My mom is great but she lacks in patience and energy.

[new_mommy25]

LOVE my in-laws. I would let MIL watch the kids over my own mom any day. My mom is great but she lacks in patience and energy.

[new_mommy25]

LOVE my in-laws. I would let MIL watch the kids over my own mom any day. My mom is great but she lacks in patience and energy.

[new_mommy25]

LOVE my in-laws. I would let MIL watch the kids over my own mom any day. My mom is great but she lacks in patience and energy.

[new_mommy25]

LOVE my in-laws. I would let MIL watch the kids over my own mom any day. My mom is great but she lacks in patience and energy.

[aliceinwonderland]

I have HUGE admiration for my in laws. MIL and I are not, and can never be "buddies", but I respect and admire her. I love my FIL, he is a very good man. They did an amazing job raising my DH, I have to respect that! And they love my son. Our views differ on many many things, but we talk when they ask and they listen :)

I also realize I am a very hard-to-love DIL, and they do okay with that :)

[aliceinwonderland]

I have HUGE admiration for my in laws. MIL and I are not, and can never be "buddies", but I respect and admire her. I love my FIL, he is a very good man. They did an amazing job raising my DH, I have to respect that! And they love my son. Our views differ on many many things, but we talk when they ask and they listen :)

I also realize I am a very hard-to-love DIL, and they do okay with that :)

[aliceinwonderland]

I have HUGE admiration for my in laws. MIL and I are not, and can never be "buddies", but I respect and admire her. I love my FIL, he is a very good man. They did an amazing job raising my DH, I have to respect that! And they love my son. Our views differ on many many things, but we talk when they ask and they listen :)

I also realize I am a very hard-to-love DIL, and they do okay with that :)

[aliceinwonderland]

I have HUGE admiration for my in laws. MIL and I are not, and can never be "buddies", but I respect and admire her. I love my FIL, he is a very good man. They did an amazing job raising my DH, I have to respect that! And they love my son. Our views differ on many many things, but we talk when they ask and they listen :)

I also realize I am a very hard-to-love DIL, and they do okay with that :)

[aliceinwonderland]

I have HUGE admiration for my in laws. MIL and I are not, and can never be "buddies", but I respect and admire her. I love my FIL, he is a very good man. They did an amazing job raising my DH, I have to respect that! And they love my son. Our views differ on many many things, but we talk when they ask and they listen :)

I also realize I am a very hard-to-love DIL, and they do okay with that :)

[aliceinwonderland]

I have HUGE admiration for my in laws. MIL and I are not, and can never be "buddies", but I respect and admire her. I love my FIL, he is a very good man. They did an amazing job raising my DH, I have to respect that! And they love my son. Our views differ on many many things, but we talk when they ask and they listen :)

I also realize I am a very hard-to-love DIL, and they do okay with that :)

[aliceinwonderland]

I have HUGE admiration for my in laws. MIL and I are not, and can never be "buddies", but I respect and admire her. I love my FIL, he is a very good man. They did an amazing job raising my DH, I have to respect that! And they love my son. Our views differ on many many things, but we talk when they ask and they listen :)

I also realize I am a very hard-to-love DIL, and they do okay with that :)

[aliceinwonderland]

I have HUGE admiration for my in laws. MIL and I are not, and can never be "buddies", but I respect and admire her. I love my FIL, he is a very good man. They did an amazing job raising my DH, I have to respect that! And they love my son. Our views differ on many many things, but we talk when they ask and they listen :)

I also realize I am a very hard-to-love DIL, and they do okay with that :)

[aliceinwonderland]

I have HUGE admiration for my in laws. MIL and I are not, and can never be "buddies", but I respect and admire her. I love my FIL, he is a very good man. They did an amazing job raising my DH, I have to respect that! And they love my son. Our views differ on many many things, but we talk when they ask and they listen :)

I also realize I am a very hard-to-love DIL, and they do okay with that :)

[brittone2]

Not so good here on the ILs front. Things were okay until I got pg with DS and it has been all downhill from there.

MIL flipped out to my own mom when she found out we were delivering w/ a midwife. She hates that I BF (hated it from the beginning as that is "beneath" her). She asked me at 10 days post partum if I had a running stroller, I told her yes, she said, oh good, that will help with losing the baby weight. Nice...and MIL isn't slender, let me tell you (I lost all of my babyweight by about 9 months postpartum easily). She and FIL hate, hate, hate how we parent. FIL told me he never spanked his kids but saw nothing wrong with giving them a firm swat when they were wiggling around on the changing table after 2 months of age, and that they "listened" to him after that :( It goes on and on. MIL told me at Christmas time that if DS has tantrums, we should consider throwing a cold glass of water in his face as that was what *their* doctor suggested and it worked like a charm when DH was a toddler. Yet she wonders why we never asked her to babysit? (and pouted to my SIL, whom she barely knows, in this past year's Christmas card, and did I mention we live 9 hours away??). I was even criticized for making DS's baby food as DH had jarred food and "turned out fine." I never said he didn't...however, if she's going to be irritated by me making baby food, then clearly, I can't win, kwim? She's determined to look at whatever I do differently than she did as a criticism of HER parenting. I've explained that our choice to do some things differently doesn't mean we think they were bad parents, but we do what we think is best for our child with the info we have available to us. That doesn't cut it for them.

We had a huge blowup before our move to NC last summer and another one at Christmas. THings have been very very strained since. I know much of what they "judge" us for is simply because they have outdated info (on starting solids, as clearly we were starving DS, BFing, discipline, etc.) but they won't even *listen* to the reasons why things are different now, kwim? I don't expect them to know that things are very different now, but when I explained for the 1000th time why DS did NOT need shoes at 6 months of age to learn how to walk (and keep in mind I was a pediatric physical therapist before he was born LOL), I expect my answer to be sufficient. It never is. The passive aggressive questioning and comments never, ever stop.

Sadly, they are missing out on their grandson. They no longer call (I've made it very clear they are welcome to call, etc. whenever they want) but MIL refuses to speak with us after our argument over the holidays. Entirely their choice.

I've accepted they won't change, they aren't even open to it, and it isn't healthy for us as a family to deal with them as they totally have no respect for boundaries and limits whatsoever.

I think sometimes with healthy boundaries, even strained relationships can go okay. For us, that doesn't seem possible. FIL and MIL basically say they *can't* change, won't try, and they won't bother. I can't make them change, but I also don't have to put myself into situations where I have to deal with their nonsense, and I won't for my own mental health :)

I *never* wanted to be a woman that didn't get along with her MIL, but here I am, and MIL and I don't speak. (we do send pics of DS, etc. though). My DH fortunately sees the light with them and is behind me which makes it much easier....he doesn't have a desire to deal with them either at this point.

[brittone2]

Not so good here on the ILs front. Things were okay until I got pg with DS and it has been all downhill from there.

MIL flipped out to my own mom when she found out we were delivering w/ a midwife. She hates that I BF (hated it from the beginning as that is "beneath" her). She asked me at 10 days post partum if I had a running stroller, I told her yes, she said, oh good, that will help with losing the baby weight. Nice...and MIL isn't slender, let me tell you (I lost all of my babyweight by about 9 months postpartum easily). She and FIL hate, hate, hate how we parent. FIL told me he never spanked his kids but saw nothing wrong with giving them a firm swat when they were wiggling around on the changing table after 2 months of age, and that they "listened" to him after that :( It goes on and on. MIL told me at Christmas time that if DS has tantrums, we should consider throwing a cold glass of water in his face as that was what *their* doctor suggested and it worked like a charm when DH was a toddler. Yet she wonders why we never asked her to babysit? (and pouted to my SIL, whom she barely knows, in this past year's Christmas card, and did I mention we live 9 hours away??). I was even criticized for making DS's baby food as DH had jarred food and "turned out fine." I never said he didn't...however, if she's going to be irritated by me making baby food, then clearly, I can't win, kwim? She's determined to look at whatever I do differently than she did as a criticism of HER parenting. I've explained that our choice to do some things differently doesn't mean we think they were bad parents, but we do what we think is best for our child with the info we have available to us. That doesn't cut it for them.

We had a huge blowup before our move to NC last summer and another one at Christmas. THings have been very very strained since. I know much of what they "judge" us for is simply because they have outdated info (on starting solids, as clearly we were starving DS, BFing, discipline, etc.) but they won't even *listen* to the reasons why things are different now, kwim? I don't expect them to know that things are very different now, but when I explained for the 1000th time why DS did NOT need shoes at 6 months of age to learn how to walk (and keep in mind I was a pediatric physical therapist before he was born LOL), I expect my answer to be sufficient. It never is. The passive aggressive questioning and comments never, ever stop.

Sadly, they are missing out on their grandson. They no longer call (I've made it very clear they are welcome to call, etc. whenever they want) but MIL refuses to speak with us after our argument over the holidays. Entirely their choice.

I've accepted they won't change, they aren't even open to it, and it isn't healthy for us as a family to deal with them as they totally have no respect for boundaries and limits whatsoever.

I think sometimes with healthy boundaries, even strained relationships can go okay. For us, that doesn't seem possible. FIL and MIL basically say they *can't* change, won't try, and they won't bother. I can't make them change, but I also don't have to put myself into situations where I have to deal with their nonsense, and I won't for my own mental health :)

I *never* wanted to be a woman that didn't get along with her MIL, but here I am, and MIL and I don't speak. (we do send pics of DS, etc. though). My DH fortunately sees the light with them and is behind me which makes it much easier....he doesn't have a desire to deal with them either at this point.

[brittone2]

Not so good here on the ILs front. Things were okay until I got pg with DS and it has been all downhill from there.

MIL flipped out to my own mom when she found out we were delivering w/ a midwife. She hates that I BF (hated it from the beginning as that is "beneath" her). She asked me at 10 days post partum if I had a running stroller, I told her yes, she said, oh good, that will help with losing the baby weight. Nice...and MIL isn't slender, let me tell you (I lost all of my babyweight by about 9 months postpartum easily). She and FIL hate, hate, hate how we parent. FIL told me he never spanked his kids but saw nothing wrong with giving them a firm swat when they were wiggling around on the changing table after 2 months of age, and that they "listened" to him after that :( It goes on and on. MIL told me at Christmas time that if DS has tantrums, we should consider throwing a cold glass of water in his face as that was what *their* doctor suggested and it worked like a charm when DH was a toddler. Yet she wonders why we never asked her to babysit? (and pouted to my SIL, whom she barely knows, in this past year's Christmas card, and did I mention we live 9 hours away??). I was even criticized for making DS's baby food as DH had jarred food and "turned out fine." I never said he didn't...however, if she's going to be irritated by me making baby food, then clearly, I can't win, kwim? She's determined to look at whatever I do differently than she did as a criticism of HER parenting. I've explained that our choice to do some things differently doesn't mean we think they were bad parents, but we do what we think is best for our child with the info we have available to us. That doesn't cut it for them.

We had a huge blowup before our move to NC last summer and another one at Christmas. THings have been very very strained since. I know much of what they "judge" us for is simply because they have outdated info (on starting solids, as clearly we were starving DS, BFing, discipline, etc.) but they won't even *listen* to the reasons why things are different now, kwim? I don't expect them to know that things are very different now, but when I explained for the 1000th time why DS did NOT need shoes at 6 months of age to learn how to walk (and keep in mind I was a pediatric physical therapist before he was born LOL), I expect my answer to be sufficient. It never is. The passive aggressive questioning and comments never, ever stop.

Sadly, they are missing out on their grandson. They no longer call (I've made it very clear they are welcome to call, etc. whenever they want) but MIL refuses to speak with us after our argument over the holidays. Entirely their choice.

I've accepted they won't change, they aren't even open to it, and it isn't healthy for us as a family to deal with them as they totally have no respect for boundaries and limits whatsoever.

I think sometimes with healthy boundaries, even strained relationships can go okay. For us, that doesn't seem possible. FIL and MIL basically say they *can't* change, won't try, and they won't bother. I can't make them change, but I also don't have to put myself into situations where I have to deal with their nonsense, and I won't for my own mental health :)

I *never* wanted to be a woman that didn't get along with her MIL, but here I am, and MIL and I don't speak. (we do send pics of DS, etc. though). My DH fortunately sees the light with them and is behind me which makes it much easier....he doesn't have a desire to deal with them either at this point.

[brittone2]

Not so good here on the ILs front. Things were okay until I got pg with DS and it has been all downhill from there.

MIL flipped out to my own mom when she found out we were delivering w/ a midwife. She hates that I BF (hated it from the beginning as that is "beneath" her). She asked me at 10 days post partum if I had a running stroller, I told her yes, she said, oh good, that will help with losing the baby weight. Nice...and MIL isn't slender, let me tell you (I lost all of my babyweight by about 9 months postpartum easily). She and FIL hate, hate, hate how we parent. FIL told me he never spanked his kids but saw nothing wrong with giving them a firm swat when they were wiggling around on the changing table after 2 months of age, and that they "listened" to him after that :( It goes on and on. MIL told me at Christmas time that if DS has tantrums, we should consider throwing a cold glass of water in his face as that was what *their* doctor suggested and it worked like a charm when DH was a toddler. Yet she wonders why we never asked her to babysit? (and pouted to my SIL, whom she barely knows, in this past year's Christmas card, and did I mention we live 9 hours away??). I was even criticized for making DS's baby food as DH had jarred food and "turned out fine." I never said he didn't...however, if she's going to be irritated by me making baby food, then clearly, I can't win, kwim? She's determined to look at whatever I do differently than she did as a criticism of HER parenting. I've explained that our choice to do some things differently doesn't mean we think they were bad parents, but we do what we think is best for our child with the info we have available to us. That doesn't cut it for them.

We had a huge blowup before our move to NC last summer and another one at Christmas. THings have been very very strained since. I know much of what they "judge" us for is simply because they have outdated info (on starting solids, as clearly we were starving DS, BFing, discipline, etc.) but they won't even *listen* to the reasons why things are different now, kwim? I don't expect them to know that things are very different now, but when I explained for the 1000th time why DS did NOT need shoes at 6 months of age to learn how to walk (and keep in mind I was a pediatric physical therapist before he was born LOL), I expect my answer to be sufficient. It never is. The passive aggressive questioning and comments never, ever stop.

Sadly, they are missing out on their grandson. They no longer call (I've made it very clear they are welcome to call, etc. whenever they want) but MIL refuses to speak with us after our argument over the holidays. Entirely their choice.

I've accepted they won't change, they aren't even open to it, and it isn't healthy for us as a family to deal with them as they totally have no respect for boundaries and limits whatsoever.

I think sometimes with healthy boundaries, even strained relationships can go okay. For us, that doesn't seem possible. FIL and MIL basically say they *can't* change, won't try, and they won't bother. I can't make them change, but I also don't have to put myself into situations where I have to deal with their nonsense, and I won't for my own mental health :)

I *never* wanted to be a woman that didn't get along with her MIL, but here I am, and MIL and I don't speak. (we do send pics of DS, etc. though). My DH fortunately sees the light with them and is behind me which makes it much easier....he doesn't have a desire to deal with them either at this point.

[brittone2]

Not so good here on the ILs front. Things were okay until I got pg with DS and it has been all downhill from there.

MIL flipped out to my own mom when she found out we were delivering w/ a midwife. She hates that I BF (hated it from the beginning as that is "beneath" her). She asked me at 10 days post partum if I had a running stroller, I told her yes, she said, oh good, that will help with losing the baby weight. Nice...and MIL isn't slender, let me tell you (I lost all of my babyweight by about 9 months postpartum easily). She and FIL hate, hate, hate how we parent. FIL told me he never spanked his kids but saw nothing wrong with giving them a firm swat when they were wiggling around on the changing table after 2 months of age, and that they "listened" to him after that :( It goes on and on. MIL told me at Christmas time that if DS has tantrums, we should consider throwing a cold glass of water in his face as that was what *their* doctor suggested and it worked like a charm when DH was a toddler. Yet she wonders why we never asked her to babysit? (and pouted to my SIL, whom she barely knows, in this past year's Christmas card, and did I mention we live 9 hours away??). I was even criticized for making DS's baby food as DH had jarred food and "turned out fine." I never said he didn't...however, if she's going to be irritated by me making baby food, then clearly, I can't win, kwim? She's determined to look at whatever I do differently than she did as a criticism of HER parenting. I've explained that our choice to do some things differently doesn't mean we think they were bad parents, but we do what we think is best for our child with the info we have available to us. That doesn't cut it for them.

We had a huge blowup before our move to NC last summer and another one at Christmas. THings have been very very strained since. I know much of what they "judge" us for is simply because they have outdated info (on starting solids, as clearly we were starving DS, BFing, discipline, etc.) but they won't even *listen* to the reasons why things are different now, kwim? I don't expect them to know that things are very different now, but when I explained for the 1000th time why DS did NOT need shoes at 6 months of age to learn how to walk (and keep in mind I was a pediatric physical therapist before he was born LOL), I expect my answer to be sufficient. It never is. The passive aggressive questioning and comments never, ever stop.

Sadly, they are missing out on their grandson. They no longer call (I've made it very clear they are welcome to call, etc. whenever they want) but MIL refuses to speak with us after our argument over the holidays. Entirely their choice.

I've accepted they won't change, they aren't even open to it, and it isn't healthy for us as a family to deal with them as they totally have no respect for boundaries and limits whatsoever.

I think sometimes with healthy boundaries, even strained relationships can go okay. For us, that doesn't seem possible. FIL and MIL basically say they *can't* change, won't try, and they won't bother. I can't make them change, but I also don't have to put myself into situations where I have to deal with their nonsense, and I won't for my own mental health :)

I *never* wanted to be a woman that didn't get along with her MIL, but here I am, and MIL and I don't speak. (we do send pics of DS, etc. though). My DH fortunately sees the light with them and is behind me which makes it much easier....he doesn't have a desire to deal with them either at this point.

[brittone2]

Not so good here on the ILs front. Things were okay until I got pg with DS and it has been all downhill from there.

MIL flipped out to my own mom when she found out we were delivering w/ a midwife. She hates that I BF (hated it from the beginning as that is "beneath" her). She asked me at 10 days post partum if I had a running stroller, I told her yes, she said, oh good, that will help with losing the baby weight. Nice...and MIL isn't slender, let me tell you (I lost all of my babyweight by about 9 months postpartum easily). She and FIL hate, hate, hate how we parent. FIL told me he never spanked his kids but saw nothing wrong with giving them a firm swat when they were wiggling around on the changing table after 2 months of age, and that they "listened" to him after that :( It goes on and on. MIL told me at Christmas time that if DS has tantrums, we should consider throwing a cold glass of water in his face as that was what *their* doctor suggested and it worked like a charm when DH was a toddler. Yet she wonders why we never asked her to babysit? (and pouted to my SIL, whom she barely knows, in this past year's Christmas card, and did I mention we live 9 hours away??). I was even criticized for making DS's baby food as DH had jarred food and "turned out fine." I never said he didn't...however, if she's going to be irritated by me making baby food, then clearly, I can't win, kwim? She's determined to look at whatever I do differently than she did as a criticism of HER parenting. I've explained that our choice to do some things differently doesn't mean we think they were bad parents, but we do what we think is best for our child with the info we have available to us. That doesn't cut it for them.

We had a huge blowup before our move to NC last summer and another one at Christmas. THings have been very very strained since. I know much of what they "judge" us for is simply because they have outdated info (on starting solids, as clearly we were starving DS, BFing, discipline, etc.) but they won't even *listen* to the reasons why things are different now, kwim? I don't expect them to know that things are very different now, but when I explained for the 1000th time why DS did NOT need shoes at 6 months of age to learn how to walk (and keep in mind I was a pediatric physical therapist before he was born LOL), I expect my answer to be sufficient. It never is. The passive aggressive questioning and comments never, ever stop.

Sadly, they are missing out on their grandson. They no longer call (I've made it very clear they are welcome to call, etc. whenever they want) but MIL refuses to speak with us after our argument over the holidays. Entirely their choice.

I've accepted they won't change, they aren't even open to it, and it isn't healthy for us as a family to deal with them as they totally have no respect for boundaries and limits whatsoever.

I think sometimes with healthy boundaries, even strained relationships can go okay. For us, that doesn't seem possible. FIL and MIL basically say they *can't* change, won't try, and they won't bother. I can't make them change, but I also don't have to put myself into situations where I have to deal with their nonsense, and I won't for my own mental health :)

I *never* wanted to be a woman that didn't get along with her MIL, but here I am, and MIL and I don't speak. (we do send pics of DS, etc. though). My DH fortunately sees the light with them and is behind me which makes it much easier....he doesn't have a desire to deal with them either at this point.

[brittone2]

Not so good here on the ILs front. Things were okay until I got pg with DS and it has been all downhill from there.

MIL flipped out to my own mom when she found out we were delivering w/ a midwife. She hates that I BF (hated it from the beginning as that is "beneath" her). She asked me at 10 days post partum if I had a running stroller, I told her yes, she said, oh good, that will help with losing the baby weight. Nice...and MIL isn't slender, let me tell you (I lost all of my babyweight by about 9 months postpartum easily). She and FIL hate, hate, hate how we parent. FIL told me he never spanked his kids but saw nothing wrong with giving them a firm swat when they were wiggling around on the changing table after 2 months of age, and that they "listened" to him after that :( It goes on and on. MIL told me at Christmas time that if DS has tantrums, we should consider throwing a cold glass of water in his face as that was what *their* doctor suggested and it worked like a charm when DH was a toddler. Yet she wonders why we never asked her to babysit? (and pouted to my SIL, whom she barely knows, in this past year's Christmas card, and did I mention we live 9 hours away??). I was even criticized for making DS's baby food as DH had jarred food and "turned out fine." I never said he didn't...however, if she's going to be irritated by me making baby food, then clearly, I can't win, kwim? She's determined to look at whatever I do differently than she did as a criticism of HER parenting. I've explained that our choice to do some things differently doesn't mean we think they were bad parents, but we do what we think is best for our child with the info we have available to us. That doesn't cut it for them.

We had a huge blowup before our move to NC last summer and another one at Christmas. THings have been very very strained since. I know much of what they "judge" us for is simply because they have outdated info (on starting solids, as clearly we were starving DS, BFing, discipline, etc.) but they won't even *listen* to the reasons why things are different now, kwim? I don't expect them to know that things are very different now, but when I explained for the 1000th time why DS did NOT need shoes at 6 months of age to learn how to walk (and keep in mind I was a pediatric physical therapist before he was born LOL), I expect my answer to be sufficient. It never is. The passive aggressive questioning and comments never, ever stop.

Sadly, they are missing out on their grandson. They no longer call (I've made it very clear they are welcome to call, etc. whenever they want) but MIL refuses to speak with us after our argument over the holidays. Entirely their choice.

I've accepted they won't change, they aren't even open to it, and it isn't healthy for us as a family to deal with them as they totally have no respect for boundaries and limits whatsoever.

I think sometimes with healthy boundaries, even strained relationships can go okay. For us, that doesn't seem possible. FIL and MIL basically say they *can't* change, won't try, and they won't bother. I can't make them change, but I also don't have to put myself into situations where I have to deal with their nonsense, and I won't for my own mental health :)

I *never* wanted to be a woman that didn't get along with her MIL, but here I am, and MIL and I don't speak. (we do send pics of DS, etc. though). My DH fortunately sees the light with them and is behind me which makes it much easier....he doesn't have a desire to deal with them either at this point.

[brittone2]

Not so good here on the ILs front. Things were okay until I got pg with DS and it has been all downhill from there.

MIL flipped out to my own mom when she found out we were delivering w/ a midwife. She hates that I BF (hated it from the beginning as that is "beneath" her). She asked me at 10 days post partum if I had a running stroller, I told her yes, she said, oh good, that will help with losing the baby weight. Nice...and MIL isn't slender, let me tell you (I lost all of my babyweight by about 9 months postpartum easily). She and FIL hate, hate, hate how we parent. FIL told me he never spanked his kids but saw nothing wrong with giving them a firm swat when they were wiggling around on the changing table after 2 months of age, and that they "listened" to him after that :( It goes on and on. MIL told me at Christmas time that if DS has tantrums, we should consider throwing a cold glass of water in his face as that was what *their* doctor suggested and it worked like a charm when DH was a toddler. Yet she wonders why we never asked her to babysit? (and pouted to my SIL, whom she barely knows, in this past year's Christmas card, and did I mention we live 9 hours away??). I was even criticized for making DS's baby food as DH had jarred food and "turned out fine." I never said he didn't...however, if she's going to be irritated by me making baby food, then clearly, I can't win, kwim? She's determined to look at whatever I do differently than she did as a criticism of HER parenting. I've explained that our choice to do some things differently doesn't mean we think they were bad parents, but we do what we think is best for our child with the info we have available to us. That doesn't cut it for them.

We had a huge blowup before our move to NC last summer and another one at Christmas. THings have been very very strained since. I know much of what they "judge" us for is simply because they have outdated info (on starting solids, as clearly we were starving DS, BFing, discipline, etc.) but they won't even *listen* to the reasons why things are different now, kwim? I don't expect them to know that things are very different now, but when I explained for the 1000th time why DS did NOT need shoes at 6 months of age to learn how to walk (and keep in mind I was a pediatric physical therapist before he was born LOL), I expect my answer to be sufficient. It never is. The passive aggressive questioning and comments never, ever stop.

Sadly, they are missing out on their grandson. They no longer call (I've made it very clear they are welcome to call, etc. whenever they want) but MIL refuses to speak with us after our argument over the holidays. Entirely their choice.

I've accepted they won't change, they aren't even open to it, and it isn't healthy for us as a family to deal with them as they totally have no respect for boundaries and limits whatsoever.

I think sometimes with healthy boundaries, even strained relationships can go okay. For us, that doesn't seem possible. FIL and MIL basically say they *can't* change, won't try, and they won't bother. I can't make them change, but I also don't have to put myself into situations where I have to deal with their nonsense, and I won't for my own mental health :)

I *never* wanted to be a woman that didn't get along with her MIL, but here I am, and MIL and I don't speak. (we do send pics of DS, etc. though). My DH fortunately sees the light with them and is behind me which makes it much easier....he doesn't have a desire to deal with them either at this point.

[brittone2]

Not so good here on the ILs front. Things were okay until I got pg with DS and it has been all downhill from there.

MIL flipped out to my own mom when she found out we were delivering w/ a midwife. She hates that I BF (hated it from the beginning as that is "beneath" her). She asked me at 10 days post partum if I had a running stroller, I told her yes, she said, oh good, that will help with losing the baby weight. Nice...and MIL isn't slender, let me tell you (I lost all of my babyweight by about 9 months postpartum easily). She and FIL hate, hate, hate how we parent. FIL told me he never spanked his kids but saw nothing wrong with giving them a firm swat when they were wiggling around on the changing table after 2 months of age, and that they "listened" to him after that :( It goes on and on. MIL told me at Christmas time that if DS has tantrums, we should consider throwing a cold glass of water in his face as that was what *their* doctor suggested and it worked like a charm when DH was a toddler. Yet she wonders why we never asked her to babysit? (and pouted to my SIL, whom she barely knows, in this past year's Christmas card, and did I mention we live 9 hours away??). I was even criticized for making DS's baby food as DH had jarred food and "turned out fine." I never said he didn't...however, if she's going to be irritated by me making baby food, then clearly, I can't win, kwim? She's determined to look at whatever I do differently than she did as a criticism of HER parenting. I've explained that our choice to do some things differently doesn't mean we think they were bad parents, but we do what we think is best for our child with the info we have available to us. That doesn't cut it for them.

We had a huge blowup before our move to NC last summer and another one at Christmas. THings have been very very strained since. I know much of what they "judge" us for is simply because they have outdated info (on starting solids, as clearly we were starving DS, BFing, discipline, etc.) but they won't even *listen* to the reasons why things are different now, kwim? I don't expect them to know that things are very different now, but when I explained for the 1000th time why DS did NOT need shoes at 6 months of age to learn how to walk (and keep in mind I was a pediatric physical therapist before he was born LOL), I expect my answer to be sufficient. It never is. The passive aggressive questioning and comments never, ever stop.

Sadly, they are missing out on their grandson. They no longer call (I've made it very clear they are welcome to call, etc. whenever they want) but MIL refuses to speak with us after our argument over the holidays. Entirely their choice.

I've accepted they won't change, they aren't even open to it, and it isn't healthy for us as a family to deal with them as they totally have no respect for boundaries and limits whatsoever.

I think sometimes with healthy boundaries, even strained relationships can go okay. For us, that doesn't seem possible. FIL and MIL basically say they *can't* change, won't try, and they won't bother. I can't make them change, but I also don't have to put myself into situations where I have to deal with their nonsense, and I won't for my own mental health :)

I *never* wanted to be a woman that didn't get along with her MIL, but here I am, and MIL and I don't speak. (we do send pics of DS, etc. though). My DH fortunately sees the light with them and is behind me which makes it much easier....he doesn't have a desire to deal with them either at this point.

[jarrettsmom9705]

Your MIL sounds just like my DM. Since day one my DM has made snide remarks about my choosing to breastfeed, not giving DS solids until 6 months old, and making my own baby food. She sees it as a criticism of her parenting if I choose to do things differently than she did with me. An example would be when she asks me "When are you going to stop this breastfeeding thing." When we went out to eat while in my hometown on a visit, she got very upset when I breastfeed DS. She didn't want all of her friends to see me. AAAAAGGGGHHHH! I told her that they would just have to "get over it."

My MIL, on the other hand, is very supportive of whatever we choose to do. She makes no judgements and totally trusts that we are doing what is best for DS.

Tracy

[jarrettsmom9705]

Your MIL sounds just like my DM. Since day one my DM has made snide remarks about my choosing to breastfeed, not giving DS solids until 6 months old, and making my own baby food. She sees it as a criticism of her parenting if I choose to do things differently than she did with me. An example would be when she asks me "When are you going to stop this breastfeeding thing." When we went out to eat while in my hometown on a visit, she got very upset when I breastfeed DS. She didn't want all of her friends to see me. AAAAAGGGGHHHH! I told her that they would just have to "get over it."

My MIL, on the other hand, is very supportive of whatever we choose to do. She makes no judgements and totally trusts that we are doing what is best for DS.

Tracy

[jarrettsmom9705]

Your MIL sounds just like my DM. Since day one my DM has made snide remarks about my choosing to breastfeed, not giving DS solids until 6 months old, and making my own baby food. She sees it as a criticism of her parenting if I choose to do things differently than she did with me. An example would be when she asks me "When are you going to stop this breastfeeding thing." When we went out to eat while in my hometown on a visit, she got very upset when I breastfeed DS. She didn't want all of her friends to see me. AAAAAGGGGHHHH! I told her that they would just have to "get over it."

My MIL, on the other hand, is very supportive of whatever we choose to do. She makes no judgements and totally trusts that we are doing what is best for DS.

Tracy

[jarrettsmom9705]

Your MIL sounds just like my DM. Since day one my DM has made snide remarks about my choosing to breastfeed, not giving DS solids until 6 months old, and making my own baby food. She sees it as a criticism of her parenting if I choose to do things differently than she did with me. An example would be when she asks me "When are you going to stop this breastfeeding thing." When we went out to eat while in my hometown on a visit, she got very upset when I breastfeed DS. She didn't want all of her friends to see me. AAAAAGGGGHHHH! I told her that they would just have to "get over it."

My MIL, on the other hand, is very supportive of whatever we choose to do. She makes no judgements and totally trusts that we are doing what is best for DS.

Tracy

[jarrettsmom9705]

Your MIL sounds just like my DM. Since day one my DM has made snide remarks about my choosing to breastfeed, not giving DS solids until 6 months old, and making my own baby food. She sees it as a criticism of her parenting if I choose to do things differently than she did with me. An example would be when she asks me "When are you going to stop this breastfeeding thing." When we went out to eat while in my hometown on a visit, she got very upset when I breastfeed DS. She didn't want all of her friends to see me. AAAAAGGGGHHHH! I told her that they would just have to "get over it."

My MIL, on the other hand, is very supportive of whatever we choose to do. She makes no judgements and totally trusts that we are doing what is best for DS.

Tracy

[jarrettsmom9705]

Your MIL sounds just like my DM. Since day one my DM has made snide remarks about my choosing to breastfeed, not giving DS solids until 6 months old, and making my own baby food. She sees it as a criticism of her parenting if I choose to do things differently than she did with me. An example would be when she asks me "When are you going to stop this breastfeeding thing." When we went out to eat while in my hometown on a visit, she got very upset when I breastfeed DS. She didn't want all of her friends to see me. AAAAAGGGGHHHH! I told her that they would just have to "get over it."

My MIL, on the other hand, is very supportive of whatever we choose to do. She makes no judgements and totally trusts that we are doing what is best for DS.

Tracy

[jarrettsmom9705]

Your MIL sounds just like my DM. Since day one my DM has made snide remarks about my choosing to breastfeed, not giving DS solids until 6 months old, and making my own baby food. She sees it as a criticism of her parenting if I choose to do things differently than she did with me. An example would be when she asks me "When are you going to stop this breastfeeding thing." When we went out to eat while in my hometown on a visit, she got very upset when I breastfeed DS. She didn't want all of her friends to see me. AAAAAGGGGHHHH! I told her that they would just have to "get over it."

My MIL, on the other hand, is very supportive of whatever we choose to do. She makes no judgements and totally trusts that we are doing what is best for DS.

Tracy

[jarrettsmom9705]

Your MIL sounds just like my DM. Since day one my DM has made snide remarks about my choosing to breastfeed, not giving DS solids until 6 months old, and making my own baby food. She sees it as a criticism of her parenting if I choose to do things differently than she did with me. An example would be when she asks me "When are you going to stop this breastfeeding thing." When we went out to eat while in my hometown on a visit, she got very upset when I breastfeed DS. She didn't want all of her friends to see me. AAAAAGGGGHHHH! I told her that they would just have to "get over it."

My MIL, on the other hand, is very supportive of whatever we choose to do. She makes no judgements and totally trusts that we are doing what is best for DS.

Tracy

[jarrettsmom9705]

Your MIL sounds just like my DM. Since day one my DM has made snide remarks about my choosing to breastfeed, not giving DS solids until 6 months old, and making my own baby food. She sees it as a criticism of her parenting if I choose to do things differently than she did with me. An example would be when she asks me "When are you going to stop this breastfeeding thing." When we went out to eat while in my hometown on a visit, she got very upset when I breastfeed DS. She didn't want all of her friends to see me. AAAAAGGGGHHHH! I told her that they would just have to "get over it."

My MIL, on the other hand, is very supportive of whatever we choose to do. She makes no judgements and totally trusts that we are doing what is best for DS.

Tracy

[1ceng1]

Funny you should bring this up. We just finished DD 1 yr b-day party and the tension was palatable between ILs and my parents as usual. I don't care for my MIL as she refuses to even say hi to my parents or sisters and takes my kids off alone away from the rest of my company as the time. They are awkward socially and come off as snobby. My mom then takes it out on me that MIL is so rude towards her.
In addition, ILs have NO pics of my kids in their house (these are the only grandkids they have), will blow us off if something better comes up in their schedule, and still pretend like they are in love with my kids. SIL has seen my kids a handful of times in 3 yrs even though she still lives at home. BIL sees them about 4 times a yr even though he is only 1 hr away and has no kids of his own. However, he and his wife have no problem finding time to vacation every 6 weeks.
I can go on, but you get the gist of it...my ILs suck!

[1ceng1]

Funny you should bring this up. We just finished DD 1 yr b-day party and the tension was palatable between ILs and my parents as usual. I don't care for my MIL as she refuses to even say hi to my parents or sisters and takes my kids off alone away from the rest of my company as the time. They are awkward socially and come off as snobby. My mom then takes it out on me that MIL is so rude towards her.
In addition, ILs have NO pics of my kids in their house (these are the only grandkids they have), will blow us off if something better comes up in their schedule, and still pretend like they are in love with my kids. SIL has seen my kids a handful of times in 3 yrs even though she still lives at home. BIL sees them about 4 times a yr even though he is only 1 hr away and has no kids of his own. However, he and his wife have no problem finding time to vacation every 6 weeks.
I can go on, but you get the gist of it...my ILs suck!

[1ceng1]

Funny you should bring this up. We just finished DD 1 yr b-day party and the tension was palatable between ILs and my parents as usual. I don't care for my MIL as she refuses to even say hi to my parents or sisters and takes my kids off alone away from the rest of my company as the time. They are awkward socially and come off as snobby. My mom then takes it out on me that MIL is so rude towards her.
In addition, ILs have NO pics of my kids in their house (these are the only grandkids they have), will blow us off if something better comes up in their schedule, and still pretend like they are in love with my kids. SIL has seen my kids a handful of times in 3 yrs even though she still lives at home. BIL sees them about 4 times a yr even though he is only 1 hr away and has no kids of his own. However, he and his wife have no problem finding time to vacation every 6 weeks.
I can go on, but you get the gist of it...my ILs suck!

[1ceng1]

Funny you should bring this up. We just finished DD 1 yr b-day party and the tension was palatable between ILs and my parents as usual. I don't care for my MIL as she refuses to even say hi to my parents or sisters and takes my kids off alone away from the rest of my company as the time. They are awkward socially and come off as snobby. My mom then takes it out on me that MIL is so rude towards her.
In addition, ILs have NO pics of my kids in their house (these are the only grandkids they have), will blow us off if something better comes up in their schedule, and still pretend like they are in love with my kids. SIL has seen my kids a handful of times in 3 yrs even though she still lives at home. BIL sees them about 4 times a yr even though he is only 1 hr away and has no kids of his own. However, he and his wife have no problem finding time to vacation every 6 weeks.
I can go on, but you get the gist of it...my ILs suck!

[1ceng1]

Funny you should bring this up. We just finished DD 1 yr b-day party and the tension was palatable between ILs and my parents as usual. I don't care for my MIL as she refuses to even say hi to my parents or sisters and takes my kids off alone away from the rest of my company as the time. They are awkward socially and come off as snobby. My mom then takes it out on me that MIL is so rude towards her.
In addition, ILs have NO pics of my kids in their house (these are the only grandkids they have), will blow us off if something better comes up in their schedule, and still pretend like they are in love with my kids. SIL has seen my kids a handful of times in 3 yrs even though she still lives at home. BIL sees them about 4 times a yr even though he is only 1 hr away and has no kids of his own. However, he and his wife have no problem finding time to vacation every 6 weeks.
I can go on, but you get the gist of it...my ILs suck!

[1ceng1]

Funny you should bring this up. We just finished DD 1 yr b-day party and the tension was palatable between ILs and my parents as usual. I don't care for my MIL as she refuses to even say hi to my parents or sisters and takes my kids off alone away from the rest of my company as the time. They are awkward socially and come off as snobby. My mom then takes it out on me that MIL is so rude towards her.
In addition, ILs have NO pics of my kids in their house (these are the only grandkids they have), will blow us off if something better comes up in their schedule, and still pretend like they are in love with my kids. SIL has seen my kids a handful of times in 3 yrs even though she still lives at home. BIL sees them about 4 times a yr even though he is only 1 hr away and has no kids of his own. However, he and his wife have no problem finding time to vacation every 6 weeks.
I can go on, but you get the gist of it...my ILs suck!

[1ceng1]

Funny you should bring this up. We just finished DD 1 yr b-day party and the tension was palatable between ILs and my parents as usual. I don't care for my MIL as she refuses to even say hi to my parents or sisters and takes my kids off alone away from the rest of my company as the time. They are awkward socially and come off as snobby. My mom then takes it out on me that MIL is so rude towards her.
In addition, ILs have NO pics of my kids in their house (these are the only grandkids they have), will blow us off if something better comes up in their schedule, and still pretend like they are in love with my kids. SIL has seen my kids a handful of times in 3 yrs even though she still lives at home. BIL sees them about 4 times a yr even though he is only 1 hr away and has no kids of his own. However, he and his wife have no problem finding time to vacation every 6 weeks.
I can go on, but you get the gist of it...my ILs suck!

[1ceng1]

Funny you should bring this up. We just finished DD 1 yr b-day party and the tension was palatable between ILs and my parents as usual. I don't care for my MIL as she refuses to even say hi to my parents or sisters and takes my kids off alone away from the rest of my company as the time. They are awkward socially and come off as snobby. My mom then takes it out on me that MIL is so rude towards her.
In addition, ILs have NO pics of my kids in their house (these are the only grandkids they have), will blow us off if something better comes up in their schedule, and still pretend like they are in love with my kids. SIL has seen my kids a handful of times in 3 yrs even though she still lives at home. BIL sees them about 4 times a yr even though he is only 1 hr away and has no kids of his own. However, he and his wife have no problem finding time to vacation every 6 weeks.
I can go on, but you get the gist of it...my ILs suck!

[1ceng1]

Funny you should bring this up. We just finished DD 1 yr b-day party and the tension was palatable between ILs and my parents as usual. I don't care for my MIL as she refuses to even say hi to my parents or sisters and takes my kids off alone away from the rest of my company as the time. They are awkward socially and come off as snobby. My mom then takes it out on me that MIL is so rude towards her.
In addition, ILs have NO pics of my kids in their house (these are the only grandkids they have), will blow us off if something better comes up in their schedule, and still pretend like they are in love with my kids. SIL has seen my kids a handful of times in 3 yrs even though she still lives at home. BIL sees them about 4 times a yr even though he is only 1 hr away and has no kids of his own. However, he and his wife have no problem finding time to vacation every 6 weeks.
I can go on, but you get the gist of it...my ILs suck!

[Nicsmom]

I cannot say I hate my MIL but I dislike her intensely. She is selfish, self absorbed, and her priorities and values are completely opposite to mine. She thrives on pity so she loves to be a victim. My FIL left her for another woman 15 years ago (I understand why) and he has two girls with his new wife. My MIL says these girls are going to pay for the sins of their parents. She rejoices in that idea. And instead of building a new life for herself as my mother did, she has been whinning for 15 years.

Then there is the religious differences we have. Basically I think anyone can believe in whatever they want as long as they don't try to push their beliefs onto me. Well... let's just say she is the complete opposite and she is not respectful of our differences.

There is also the money aspect to our problems. As I mentioned in another post, we have supported her financially for more than 10 years. She did not manage the money FIL left her wisely so she ended up needing our help. That puts a lot of strain in our relationship because, as self-centered as she is, you know that when the phone rings is because she is asking for money. When she comes to visit(we pay for all the expenses)she always complains for some reason: she is not staying long enough, my FIL stayed in the room she will be sleeping, she'd rather fly on Monday not on Tuesday etc... HEY!! We are inviting you!!! BE GRATEFUL!

I can go on and on but I will spare you. My DH knows her mother is "difficult", but as he says, it is his mother. And he is a wonderful DH and a great son. So she must have done many things right. I try to focus on that but, believe me, it is hard.

[Nicsmom]

I cannot say I hate my MIL but I dislike her intensely. She is selfish, self absorbed, and her priorities and values are completely opposite to mine. She thrives on pity so she loves to be a victim. My FIL left her for another woman 15 years ago (I understand why) and he has two girls with his new wife. My MIL says these girls are going to pay for the sins of their parents. She rejoices in that idea. And instead of building a new life for herself as my mother did, she has been whinning for 15 years.

Then there is the religious differences we have. Basically I think anyone can believe in whatever they want as long as they don't try to push their beliefs onto me. Well... let's just say she is the complete opposite and she is not respectful of our differences.

There is also the money aspect to our problems. As I mentioned in another post, we have supported her financially for more than 10 years. She did not manage the money FIL left her wisely so she ended up needing our help. That puts a lot of strain in our relationship because, as self-centered as she is, you know that when the phone rings is because she is asking for money. When she comes to visit(we pay for all the expenses)she always complains for some reason: she is not staying long enough, my FIL stayed in the room she will be sleeping, she'd rather fly on Monday not on Tuesday etc... HEY!! We are inviting you!!! BE GRATEFUL!

I can go on and on but I will spare you. My DH knows her mother is "difficult", but as he says, it is his mother. And he is a wonderful DH and a great son. So she must have done many things right. I try to focus on that but, believe me, it is hard.

[Nicsmom]

I cannot say I hate my MIL but I dislike her intensely. She is selfish, self absorbed, and her priorities and values are completely opposite to mine. She thrives on pity so she loves to be a victim. My FIL left her for another woman 15 years ago (I understand why) and he has two girls with his new wife. My MIL says these girls are going to pay for the sins of their parents. She rejoices in that idea. And instead of building a new life for herself as my mother did, she has been whinning for 15 years.

Then there is the religious differences we have. Basically I think anyone can believe in whatever they want as long as they don't try to push their beliefs onto me. Well... let's just say she is the complete opposite and she is not respectful of our differences.

There is also the money aspect to our problems. As I mentioned in another post, we have supported her financially for more than 10 years. She did not manage the money FIL left her wisely so she ended up needing our help. That puts a lot of strain in our relationship because, as self-centered as she is, you know that when the phone rings is because she is asking for money. When she comes to visit(we pay for all the expenses)she always complains for some reason: she is not staying long enough, my FIL stayed in the room she will be sleeping, she'd rather fly on Monday not on Tuesday etc... HEY!! We are inviting you!!! BE GRATEFUL!

I can go on and on but I will spare you. My DH knows her mother is "difficult", but as he says, it is his mother. And he is a wonderful DH and a great son. So she must have done many things right. I try to focus on that but, believe me, it is hard.

[Nicsmom]

I cannot say I hate my MIL but I dislike her intensely. She is selfish, self absorbed, and her priorities and values are completely opposite to mine. She thrives on pity so she loves to be a victim. My FIL left her for another woman 15 years ago (I understand why) and he has two girls with his new wife. My MIL says these girls are going to pay for the sins of their parents. She rejoices in that idea. And instead of building a new life for herself as my mother did, she has been whinning for 15 years.

Then there is the religious differences we have. Basically I think anyone can believe in whatever they want as long as they don't try to push their beliefs onto me. Well... let's just say she is the complete opposite and she is not respectful of our differences.

There is also the money aspect to our problems. As I mentioned in another post, we have supported her financially for more than 10 years. She did not manage the money FIL left her wisely so she ended up needing our help. That puts a lot of strain in our relationship because, as self-centered as she is, you know that when the phone rings is because she is asking for money. When she comes to visit(we pay for all the expenses)she always complains for some reason: she is not staying long enough, my FIL stayed in the room she will be sleeping, she'd rather fly on Monday not on Tuesday etc... HEY!! We are inviting you!!! BE GRATEFUL!

I can go on and on but I will spare you. My DH knows her mother is "difficult", but as he says, it is his mother. And he is a wonderful DH and a great son. So she must have done many things right. I try to focus on that but, believe me, it is hard.

[Nicsmom]

I cannot say I hate my MIL but I dislike her intensely. She is selfish, self absorbed, and her priorities and values are completely opposite to mine. She thrives on pity so she loves to be a victim. My FIL left her for another woman 15 years ago (I understand why) and he has two girls with his new wife. My MIL says these girls are going to pay for the sins of their parents. She rejoices in that idea. And instead of building a new life for herself as my mother did, she has been whinning for 15 years.

Then there is the religious differences we have. Basically I think anyone can believe in whatever they want as long as they don't try to push their beliefs onto me. Well... let's just say she is the complete opposite and she is not respectful of our differences.

There is also the money aspect to our problems. As I mentioned in another post, we have supported her financially for more than 10 years. She did not manage the money FIL left her wisely so she ended up needing our help. That puts a lot of strain in our relationship because, as self-centered as she is, you know that when the phone rings is because she is asking for money. When she comes to visit(we pay for all the expenses)she always complains for some reason: she is not staying long enough, my FIL stayed in the room she will be sleeping, she'd rather fly on Monday not on Tuesday etc... HEY!! We are inviting you!!! BE GRATEFUL!

I can go on and on but I will spare you. My DH knows her mother is "difficult", but as he says, it is his mother. And he is a wonderful DH and a great son. So she must have done many things right. I try to focus on that but, believe me, it is hard.

[Nicsmom]

I cannot say I hate my MIL but I dislike her intensely. She is selfish, self absorbed, and her priorities and values are completely opposite to mine. She thrives on pity so she loves to be a victim. My FIL left her for another woman 15 years ago (I understand why) and he has two girls with his new wife. My MIL says these girls are going to pay for the sins of their parents. She rejoices in that idea. And instead of building a new life for herself as my mother did, she has been whinning for 15 years.

Then there is the religious differences we have. Basically I think anyone can believe in whatever they want as long as they don't try to push their beliefs onto me. Well... let's just say she is the complete opposite and she is not respectful of our differences.

There is also the money aspect to our problems. As I mentioned in another post, we have supported her financially for more than 10 years. She did not manage the money FIL left her wisely so she ended up needing our help. That puts a lot of strain in our relationship because, as self-centered as she is, you know that when the phone rings is because she is asking for money. When she comes to visit(we pay for all the expenses)she always complains for some reason: she is not staying long enough, my FIL stayed in the room she will be sleeping, she'd rather fly on Monday not on Tuesday etc... HEY!! We are inviting you!!! BE GRATEFUL!

I can go on and on but I will spare you. My DH knows her mother is "difficult", but as he says, it is his mother. And he is a wonderful DH and a great son. So she must have done many things right. I try to focus on that but, believe me, it is hard.

[Nicsmom]

I cannot say I hate my MIL but I dislike her intensely. She is selfish, self absorbed, and her priorities and values are completely opposite to mine. She thrives on pity so she loves to be a victim. My FIL left her for another woman 15 years ago (I understand why) and he has two girls with his new wife. My MIL says these girls are going to pay for the sins of their parents. She rejoices in that idea. And instead of building a new life for herself as my mother did, she has been whinning for 15 years.

Then there is the religious differences we have. Basically I think anyone can believe in whatever they want as long as they don't try to push their beliefs onto me. Well... let's just say she is the complete opposite and she is not respectful of our differences.

There is also the money aspect to our problems. As I mentioned in another post, we have supported her financially for more than 10 years. She did not manage the money FIL left her wisely so she ended up needing our help. That puts a lot of strain in our relationship because, as self-centered as she is, you know that when the phone rings is because she is asking for money. When she comes to visit(we pay for all the expenses)she always complains for some reason: she is not staying long enough, my FIL stayed in the room she will be sleeping, she'd rather fly on Monday not on Tuesday etc... HEY!! We are inviting you!!! BE GRATEFUL!

I can go on and on but I will spare you. My DH knows her mother is "difficult", but as he says, it is his mother. And he is a wonderful DH and a great son. So she must have done many things right. I try to focus on that but, believe me, it is hard.

[Nicsmom]

I cannot say I hate my MIL but I dislike her intensely. She is selfish, self absorbed, and her priorities and values are completely opposite to mine. She thrives on pity so she loves to be a victim. My FIL left her for another woman 15 years ago (I understand why) and he has two girls with his new wife. My MIL says these girls are going to pay for the sins of their parents. She rejoices in that idea. And instead of building a new life for herself as my mother did, she has been whinning for 15 years.

Then there is the religious differences we have. Basically I think anyone can believe in whatever they want as long as they don't try to push their beliefs onto me. Well... let's just say she is the complete opposite and she is not respectful of our differences.

There is also the money aspect to our problems. As I mentioned in another post, we have supported her financially for more than 10 years. She did not manage the money FIL left her wisely so she ended up needing our help. That puts a lot of strain in our relationship because, as self-centered as she is, you know that when the phone rings is because she is asking for money. When she comes to visit(we pay for all the expenses)she always complains for some reason: she is not staying long enough, my FIL stayed in the room she will be sleeping, she'd rather fly on Monday not on Tuesday etc... HEY!! We are inviting you!!! BE GRATEFUL!

I can go on and on but I will spare you. My DH knows her mother is "difficult", but as he says, it is his mother. And he is a wonderful DH and a great son. So she must have done many things right. I try to focus on that but, believe me, it is hard.

[Nicsmom]

I cannot say I hate my MIL but I dislike her intensely. She is selfish, self absorbed, and her priorities and values are completely opposite to mine. She thrives on pity so she loves to be a victim. My FIL left her for another woman 15 years ago (I understand why) and he has two girls with his new wife. My MIL says these girls are going to pay for the sins of their parents. She rejoices in that idea. And instead of building a new life for herself as my mother did, she has been whinning for 15 years.

Then there is the religious differences we have. Basically I think anyone can believe in whatever they want as long as they don't try to push their beliefs onto me. Well... let's just say she is the complete opposite and she is not respectful of our differences.

There is also the money aspect to our problems. As I mentioned in another post, we have supported her financially for more than 10 years. She did not manage the money FIL left her wisely so she ended up needing our help. That puts a lot of strain in our relationship because, as self-centered as she is, you know that when the phone rings is because she is asking for money. When she comes to visit(we pay for all the expenses)she always complains for some reason: she is not staying long enough, my FIL stayed in the room she will be sleeping, she'd rather fly on Monday not on Tuesday etc... HEY!! We are inviting you!!! BE GRATEFUL!

I can go on and on but I will spare you. My DH knows her mother is "difficult", but as he says, it is his mother. And he is a wonderful DH and a great son. So she must have done many things right. I try to focus on that but, believe me, it is hard.

[ChefGirl]

I totally hear you. My MIL is totally self-centered and selfish. All she cares about is how everything look in apprearance to the others. We have these so called "family get together" with them and SIL. They are just more opportunities for her to take pictures after pictures. Ugh! It totally annoys me.

I can go on and on forever too! I think the root of my issue with her stem from our wedding planning. After we got engaged, DH (well boyfriend at the time) and I decided to split the cost between the two families. Let me just add to say that my family lives out of state. I'm the only child. So, with my parent's out of town friends, we only had about 1 table at the reception out of the 20+tables. The rest were his parents' friends, etc. Our friends were mostly in the wedding party and no more than two more additional tables. Everything was a "show" to his mother. Anyway, she decided to write a letter to my parents behind everyone's back complaining about how the wedding was going to cost so much that they are going bankrupt! My parents weren't even going to bring it up but I dragged it out of them. I was so pissed that we almost eloped. DH was mad as hell and told his Dad about it. His Dad almost blew a gasket on MIL. She is just embarrassing all the way around. She has no taste whatsoever. Okay, I will stop now. Thanks for letting me vent!

[ChefGirl]

I totally hear you. My MIL is totally self-centered and selfish. All she cares about is how everything look in apprearance to the others. We have these so called "family get together" with them and SIL. They are just more opportunities for her to take pictures after pictures. Ugh! It totally annoys me.

I can go on and on forever too! I think the root of my issue with her stem from our wedding planning. After we got engaged, DH (well boyfriend at the time) and I decided to split the cost between the two families. Let me just add to say that my family lives out of state. I'm the only child. So, with my parent's out of town friends, we only had about 1 table at the reception out of the 20+tables. The rest were his parents' friends, etc. Our friends were mostly in the wedding party and no more than two more additional tables. Everything was a "show" to his mother. Anyway, she decided to write a letter to my parents behind everyone's back complaining about how the wedding was going to cost so much that they are going bankrupt! My parents weren't even going to bring it up but I dragged it out of them. I was so pissed that we almost eloped. DH was mad as hell and told his Dad about it. His Dad almost blew a gasket on MIL. She is just embarrassing all the way around. She has no taste whatsoever. Okay, I will stop now. Thanks for letting me vent!

[ChefGirl]

I totally hear you. My MIL is totally self-centered and selfish. All she cares about is how everything look in apprearance to the others. We have these so called "family get together" with them and SIL. They are just more opportunities for her to take pictures after pictures. Ugh! It totally annoys me.

I can go on and on forever too! I think the root of my issue with her stem from our wedding planning. After we got engaged, DH (well boyfriend at the time) and I decided to split the cost between the two families. Let me just add to say that my family lives out of state. I'm the only child. So, with my parent's out of town friends, we only had about 1 table at the reception out of the 20+tables. The rest were his parents' friends, etc. Our friends were mostly in the wedding party and no more than two more additional tables. Everything was a "show" to his mother. Anyway, she decided to write a letter to my parents behind everyone's back complaining about how the wedding was going to cost so much that they are going bankrupt! My parents weren't even going to bring it up but I dragged it out of them. I was so pissed that we almost eloped. DH was mad as hell and told his Dad about it. His Dad almost blew a gasket on MIL. She is just embarrassing all the way around. She has no taste whatsoever. Okay, I will stop now. Thanks for letting me vent!

[ChefGirl]

I totally hear you. My MIL is totally self-centered and selfish. All she cares about is how everything look in apprearance to the others. We have these so called "family get together" with them and SIL. They are just more opportunities for her to take pictures after pictures. Ugh! It totally annoys me.

I can go on and on forever too! I think the root of my issue with her stem from our wedding planning. After we got engaged, DH (well boyfriend at the time) and I decided to split the cost between the two families. Let me just add to say that my family lives out of state. I'm the only child. So, with my parent's out of town friends, we only had about 1 table at the reception out of the 20+tables. The rest were his parents' friends, etc. Our friends were mostly in the wedding party and no more than two more additional tables. Everything was a "show" to his mother. Anyway, she decided to write a letter to my parents behind everyone's back complaining about how the wedding was going to cost so much that they are going bankrupt! My parents weren't even going to bring it up but I dragged it out of them. I was so pissed that we almost eloped. DH was mad as hell and told his Dad about it. His Dad almost blew a gasket on MIL. She is just embarrassing all the way around. She has no taste whatsoever. Okay, I will stop now. Thanks for letting me vent!

[ChefGirl]

I totally hear you. My MIL is totally self-centered and selfish. All she cares about is how everything look in apprearance to the others. We have these so called "family get together" with them and SIL. They are just more opportunities for her to take pictures after pictures. Ugh! It totally annoys me.

I can go on and on forever too! I think the root of my issue with her stem from our wedding planning. After we got engaged, DH (well boyfriend at the time) and I decided to split the cost between the two families. Let me just add to say that my family lives out of state. I'm the only child. So, with my parent's out of town friends, we only had about 1 table at the reception out of the 20+tables. The rest were his parents' friends, etc. Our friends were mostly in the wedding party and no more than two more additional tables. Everything was a "show" to his mother. Anyway, she decided to write a letter to my parents behind everyone's back complaining about how the wedding was going to cost so much that they are going bankrupt! My parents weren't even going to bring it up but I dragged it out of them. I was so pissed that we almost eloped. DH was mad as hell and told his Dad about it. His Dad almost blew a gasket on MIL. She is just embarrassing all the way around. She has no taste whatsoever. Okay, I will stop now. Thanks for letting me vent!

[ChefGirl]

I totally hear you. My MIL is totally self-centered and selfish. All she cares about is how everything look in apprearance to the others. We have these so called "family get together" with them and SIL. They are just more opportunities for her to take pictures after pictures. Ugh! It totally annoys me.

I can go on and on forever too! I think the root of my issue with her stem from our wedding planning. After we got engaged, DH (well boyfriend at the time) and I decided to split the cost between the two families. Let me just add to say that my family lives out of state. I'm the only child. So, with my parent's out of town friends, we only had about 1 table at the reception out of the 20+tables. The rest were his parents' friends, etc. Our friends were mostly in the wedding party and no more than two more additional tables. Everything was a "show" to his mother. Anyway, she decided to write a letter to my parents behind everyone's back complaining about how the wedding was going to cost so much that they are going bankrupt! My parents weren't even going to bring it up but I dragged it out of them. I was so pissed that we almost eloped. DH was mad as hell and told his Dad about it. His Dad almost blew a gasket on MIL. She is just embarrassing all the way around. She has no taste whatsoever. Okay, I will stop now. Thanks for letting me vent!

[ChefGirl]

I totally hear you. My MIL is totally self-centered and selfish. All she cares about is how everything look in apprearance to the others. We have these so called "family get together" with them and SIL. They are just more opportunities for her to take pictures after pictures. Ugh! It totally annoys me.

I can go on and on forever too! I think the root of my issue with her stem from our wedding planning. After we got engaged, DH (well boyfriend at the time) and I decided to split the cost between the two families. Let me just add to say that my family lives out of state. I'm the only child. So, with my parent's out of town friends, we only had about 1 table at the reception out of the 20+tables. The rest were his parents' friends, etc. Our friends were mostly in the wedding party and no more than two more additional tables. Everything was a "show" to his mother. Anyway, she decided to write a letter to my parents behind everyone's back complaining about how the wedding was going to cost so much that they are going bankrupt! My parents weren't even going to bring it up but I dragged it out of them. I was so pissed that we almost eloped. DH was mad as hell and told his Dad about it. His Dad almost blew a gasket on MIL. She is just embarrassing all the way around. She has no taste whatsoever. Okay, I will stop now. Thanks for letting me vent!

[ChefGirl]

I totally hear you. My MIL is totally self-centered and selfish. All she cares about is how everything look in apprearance to the others. We have these so called "family get together" with them and SIL. They are just more opportunities for her to take pictures after pictures. Ugh! It totally annoys me.

I can go on and on forever too! I think the root of my issue with her stem from our wedding planning. After we got engaged, DH (well boyfriend at the time) and I decided to split the cost between the two families. Let me just add to say that my family lives out of state. I'm the only child. So, with my parent's out of town friends, we only had about 1 table at the reception out of the 20+tables. The rest were his parents' friends, etc. Our friends were mostly in the wedding party and no more than two more additional tables. Everything was a "show" to his mother. Anyway, she decided to write a letter to my parents behind everyone's back complaining about how the wedding was going to cost so much that they are going bankrupt! My parents weren't even going to bring it up but I dragged it out of them. I was so pissed that we almost eloped. DH was mad as hell and told his Dad about it. His Dad almost blew a gasket on MIL. She is just embarrassing all the way around. She has no taste whatsoever. Okay, I will stop now. Thanks for letting me vent!

[ChefGirl]

I totally hear you. My MIL is totally self-centered and selfish. All she cares about is how everything look in apprearance to the others. We have these so called "family get together" with them and SIL. They are just more opportunities for her to take pictures after pictures. Ugh! It totally annoys me.

I can go on and on forever too! I think the root of my issue with her stem from our wedding planning. After we got engaged, DH (well boyfriend at the time) and I decided to split the cost between the two families. Let me just add to say that my family lives out of state. I'm the only child. So, with my parent's out of town friends, we only had about 1 table at the reception out of the 20+tables. The rest were his parents' friends, etc. Our friends were mostly in the wedding party and no more than two more additional tables. Everything was a "show" to his mother. Anyway, she decided to write a letter to my parents behind everyone's back complaining about how the wedding was going to cost so much that they are going bankrupt! My parents weren't even going to bring it up but I dragged it out of them. I was so pissed that we almost eloped. DH was mad as hell and told his Dad about it. His Dad almost blew a gasket on MIL. She is just embarrassing all the way around. She has no taste whatsoever. Okay, I will stop now. Thanks for letting me vent!

[maestramommy]

My MIL loves me and has from the day we met. It was hard not to because as far as spec go I'm everything she could've asked for in a DIL (same race, religion, etc). She has loved DD since she was born, and I know I can trust her to take care of her in the 2 short times we've left Dd with her. My SIL is also really great, and has the perspective of having 2 dd's that are quite a few years older.

Top things about MIL:

1. She loves to take care of family. Whether we're visiting her or she's visiting us, she loves to cook for us, play with dd, just pamper us.

2. She's the ultimate grandma, doesn't let the grandkids get away with too much, but otherwise very nurturing.

The biggest niggle?

She doesn't quite see eye-to-eye with Dh and me about our parenting. We do CIO which she doesn't approve of. She thinks that if a baby cries too hard they could get a hernia, or become bad-tempered children. When we were visiting her last week, I had to nurse dd down for every nap and at bedtime, and every time she woke up because I couldn't let her cry. She asked why don't we try lying down with her for a while until she falls asleep (how? in her crib?). When we explained that cosleeping just doesn't work with dd because she thinks it's playtime outside of her crib it just didn't sink in. One night she was urging us to go on a date and leave her with dd. I had planned to pump so I'd have a bottle but it just didn't work out so we told her we didn't have any milk on hand in case dd woke up (we were going to leave after putting her to bed, and the night before dd woke up 45 minutes later), so she said, well how about formula. Dh said we don't have anything like that, and she said well you can just buy it at the market. To which I said very emphatically, no I'm not giving her formula just so we can go on a date. Well, she insisted she could handle it so we went. We called her after dinner and it turned out DD woke up right after we left and refused to go back to sleep. So we rushed home, and I nursed her down. Afterwards MIL tells me she was telling Dh that we need to find a substitute for me, like a paci, or warm milk or something. Dh already told her that DD doesn't take a paci, and she knew about the milk thing. Then she says, what about regular milk or honey (?!). Then she came back to the "most babies love to cuddle with the parents in bed. You should really try that." Then Dh said she had always slept in her own bed, so now sleeping with us was irksome or ineffective. To which she said, "oh since you cut it off early, now it won't work. Because most babies blah blah blah." I suppose she was inferring that dd was abnormal because she didn't. Then she asks if I know how the dd of a neighbor (same age) sleeps. I knew they must cosleep because they are very AP. And she goes on about the super bed that grandpa built for the entire family of 4. Gaaaaaaa!!! She's a wonderful lady, and I love her, but on this subject she drives me nuts, and Dh also. He maintains it's better not to discuss these things with her because our opinion never sinks in, so she keeps repeating herself, and she's always thinking that she's right. Luckily he's happy to protect me and do all the yelling necessary.

It's not really that bad, esp. since we only see her once or twice a year. And most of the visit is always happy. I'm lucky really :-)

[maestramommy]

My MIL loves me and has from the day we met. It was hard not to because as far as spec go I'm everything she could've asked for in a DIL (same race, religion, etc). She has loved DD since she was born, and I know I can trust her to take care of her in the 2 short times we've left Dd with her. My SIL is also really great, and has the perspective of having 2 dd's that are quite a few years older.

Top things about MIL:

1. She loves to take care of family. Whether we're visiting her or she's visiting us, she loves to cook for us, play with dd, just pamper us.

2. She's the ultimate grandma, doesn't let the grandkids get away with too much, but otherwise very nurturing.

The biggest niggle?

She doesn't quite see eye-to-eye with Dh and me about our parenting. We do CIO which she doesn't approve of. She thinks that if a baby cries too hard they could get a hernia, or become bad-tempered children. When we were visiting her last week, I had to nurse dd down for every nap and at bedtime, and every time she woke up because I couldn't let her cry. She asked why don't we try lying down with her for a while until she falls asleep (how? in her crib?). When we explained that cosleeping just doesn't work with dd because she thinks it's playtime outside of her crib it just didn't sink in. One night she was urging us to go on a date and leave her with dd. I had planned to pump so I'd have a bottle but it just didn't work out so we told her we didn't have any milk on hand in case dd woke up (we were going to leave after putting her to bed, and the night before dd woke up 45 minutes later), so she said, well how about formula. Dh said we don't have anything like that, and she said well you can just buy it at the market. To which I said very emphatically, no I'm not giving her formula just so we can go on a date. Well, she insisted she could handle it so we went. We called her after dinner and it turned out DD woke up right after we left and refused to go back to sleep. So we rushed home, and I nursed her down. Afterwards MIL tells me she was telling Dh that we need to find a substitute for me, like a paci, or warm milk or something. Dh already told her that DD doesn't take a paci, and she knew about the milk thing. Then she says, what about regular milk or honey (?!). Then she came back to the "most babies love to cuddle with the parents in bed. You should really try that." Then Dh said she had always slept in her own bed, so now sleeping with us was irksome or ineffective. To which she said, "oh since you cut it off early, now it won't work. Because most babies blah blah blah." I suppose she was inferring that dd was abnormal because she didn't. Then she asks if I know how the dd of a neighbor (same age) sleeps. I knew they must cosleep because they are very AP. And she goes on about the super bed that grandpa built for the entire family of 4. Gaaaaaaa!!! She's a wonderful lady, and I love her, but on this subject she drives me nuts, and Dh also. He maintains it's better not to discuss these things with her because our opinion never sinks in, so she keeps repeating herself, and she's always thinking that she's right. Luckily he's happy to protect me and do all the yelling necessary.

It's not really that bad, esp. since we only see her once or twice a year. And most of the visit is always happy. I'm lucky really :-)

[maestramommy]

My MIL loves me and has from the day we met. It was hard not to because as far as spec go I'm everything she could've asked for in a DIL (same race, religion, etc). She has loved DD since she was born, and I know I can trust her to take care of her in the 2 short times we've left Dd with her. My SIL is also really great, and has the perspective of having 2 dd's that are quite a few years older.

Top things about MIL:

1. She loves to take care of family. Whether we're visiting her or she's visiting us, she loves to cook for us, play with dd, just pamper us.

2. She's the ultimate grandma, doesn't let the grandkids get away with too much, but otherwise very nurturing.

The biggest niggle?

She doesn't quite see eye-to-eye with Dh and me about our parenting. We do CIO which she doesn't approve of. She thinks that if a baby cries too hard they could get a hernia, or become bad-tempered children. When we were visiting her last week, I had to nurse dd down for every nap and at bedtime, and every time she woke up because I couldn't let her cry. She asked why don't we try lying down with her for a while until she falls asleep (how? in her crib?). When we explained that cosleeping just doesn't work with dd because she thinks it's playtime outside of her crib it just didn't sink in. One night she was urging us to go on a date and leave her with dd. I had planned to pump so I'd have a bottle but it just didn't work out so we told her we didn't have any milk on hand in case dd woke up (we were going to leave after putting her to bed, and the night before dd woke up 45 minutes later), so she said, well how about formula. Dh said we don't have anything like that, and she said well you can just buy it at the market. To which I said very emphatically, no I'm not giving her formula just so we can go on a date. Well, she insisted she could handle it so we went. We called her after dinner and it turned out DD woke up right after we left and refused to go back to sleep. So we rushed home, and I nursed her down. Afterwards MIL tells me she was telling Dh that we need to find a substitute for me, like a paci, or warm milk or something. Dh already told her that DD doesn't take a paci, and she knew about the milk thing. Then she says, what about regular milk or honey (?!). Then she came back to the "most babies love to cuddle with the parents in bed. You should really try that." Then Dh said she had always slept in her own bed, so now sleeping with us was irksome or ineffective. To which she said, "oh since you cut it off early, now it won't work. Because most babies blah blah blah." I suppose she was inferring that dd was abnormal because she didn't. Then she asks if I know how the dd of a neighbor (same age) sleeps. I knew they must cosleep because they are very AP. And she goes on about the super bed that grandpa built for the entire family of 4. Gaaaaaaa!!! She's a wonderful lady, and I love her, but on this subject she drives me nuts, and Dh also. He maintains it's better not to discuss these things with her because our opinion never sinks in, so she keeps repeating herself, and she's always thinking that she's right. Luckily he's happy to protect me and do all the yelling necessary.

It's not really that bad, esp. since we only see her once or twice a year. And most of the visit is always happy. I'm lucky really :-)

[maestramommy]

My MIL loves me and has from the day we met. It was hard not to because as far as spec go I'm everything she could've asked for in a DIL (same race, religion, etc). She has loved DD since she was born, and I know I can trust her to take care of her in the 2 short times we've left Dd with her. My SIL is also really great, and has the perspective of having 2 dd's that are quite a few years older.

Top things about MIL:

1. She loves to take care of family. Whether we're visiting her or she's visiting us, she loves to cook for us, play with dd, just pamper us.

2. She's the ultimate grandma, doesn't let the grandkids get away with too much, but otherwise very nurturing.

The biggest niggle?

She doesn't quite see eye-to-eye with Dh and me about our parenting. We do CIO which she doesn't approve of. She thinks that if a baby cries too hard they could get a hernia, or become bad-tempered children. When we were visiting her last week, I had to nurse dd down for every nap and at bedtime, and every time she woke up because I couldn't let her cry. She asked why don't we try lying down with her for a while until she falls asleep (how? in her crib?). When we explained that cosleeping just doesn't work with dd because she thinks it's playtime outside of her crib it just didn't sink in. One night she was urging us to go on a date and leave her with dd. I had planned to pump so I'd have a bottle but it just didn't work out so we told her we didn't have any milk on hand in case dd woke up (we were going to leave after putting her to bed, and the night before dd woke up 45 minutes later), so she said, well how about formula. Dh said we don't have anything like that, and she said well you can just buy it at the market. To which I said very emphatically, no I'm not giving her formula just so we can go on a date. Well, she insisted she could handle it so we went. We called her after dinner and it turned out DD woke up right after we left and refused to go back to sleep. So we rushed home, and I nursed her down. Afterwards MIL tells me she was telling Dh that we need to find a substitute for me, like a paci, or warm milk or something. Dh already told her that DD doesn't take a paci, and she knew about the milk thing. Then she says, what about regular milk or honey (?!). Then she came back to the "most babies love to cuddle with the parents in bed. You should really try that." Then Dh said she had always slept in her own bed, so now sleeping with us was irksome or ineffective. To which she said, "oh since you cut it off early, now it won't work. Because most babies blah blah blah." I suppose she was inferring that dd was abnormal because she didn't. Then she asks if I know how the dd of a neighbor (same age) sleeps. I knew they must cosleep because they are very AP. And she goes on about the super bed that grandpa built for the entire family of 4. Gaaaaaaa!!! She's a wonderful lady, and I love her, but on this subject she drives me nuts, and Dh also. He maintains it's better not to discuss these things with her because our opinion never sinks in, so she keeps repeating herself, and she's always thinking that she's right. Luckily he's happy to protect me and do all the yelling necessary.

It's not really that bad, esp. since we only see her once or twice a year. And most of the visit is always happy. I'm lucky really :-)

[maestramommy]

My MIL loves me and has from the day we met. It was hard not to because as far as spec go I'm everything she could've asked for in a DIL (same race, religion, etc). She has loved DD since she was born, and I know I can trust her to take care of her in the 2 short times we've left Dd with her. My SIL is also really great, and has the perspective of having 2 dd's that are quite a few years older.

Top things about MIL:

1. She loves to take care of family. Whether we're visiting her or she's visiting us, she loves to cook for us, play with dd, just pamper us.

2. She's the ultimate grandma, doesn't let the grandkids get away with too much, but otherwise very nurturing.

The biggest niggle?

She doesn't quite see eye-to-eye with Dh and me about our parenting. We do CIO which she doesn't approve of. She thinks that if a baby cries too hard they could get a hernia, or become bad-tempered children. When we were visiting her last week, I had to nurse dd down for every nap and at bedtime, and every time she woke up because I couldn't let her cry. She asked why don't we try lying down with her for a while until she falls asleep (how? in her crib?). When we explained that cosleeping just doesn't work with dd because she thinks it's playtime outside of her crib it just didn't sink in. One night she was urging us to go on a date and leave her with dd. I had planned to pump so I'd have a bottle but it just didn't work out so we told her we didn't have any milk on hand in case dd woke up (we were going to leave after putting her to bed, and the night before dd woke up 45 minutes later), so she said, well how about formula. Dh said we don't have anything like that, and she said well you can just buy it at the market. To which I said very emphatically, no I'm not giving her formula just so we can go on a date. Well, she insisted she could handle it so we went. We called her after dinner and it turned out DD woke up right after we left and refused to go back to sleep. So we rushed home, and I nursed her down. Afterwards MIL tells me she was telling Dh that we need to find a substitute for me, like a paci, or warm milk or something. Dh already told her that DD doesn't take a paci, and she knew about the milk thing. Then she says, what about regular milk or honey (?!). Then she came back to the "most babies love to cuddle with the parents in bed. You should really try that." Then Dh said she had always slept in her own bed, so now sleeping with us was irksome or ineffective. To which she said, "oh since you cut it off early, now it won't work. Because most babies blah blah blah." I suppose she was inferring that dd was abnormal because she didn't. Then she asks if I know how the dd of a neighbor (same age) sleeps. I knew they must cosleep because they are very AP. And she goes on about the super bed that grandpa built for the entire family of 4. Gaaaaaaa!!! She's a wonderful lady, and I love her, but on this subject she drives me nuts, and Dh also. He maintains it's better not to discuss these things with her because our opinion never sinks in, so she keeps repeating herself, and she's always thinking that she's right. Luckily he's happy to protect me and do all the yelling necessary.

It's not really that bad, esp. since we only see her once or twice a year. And most of the visit is always happy. I'm lucky really :-)

[maestramommy]

My MIL loves me and has from the day we met. It was hard not to because as far as spec go I'm everything she could've asked for in a DIL (same race, religion, etc). She has loved DD since she was born, and I know I can trust her to take care of her in the 2 short times we've left Dd with her. My SIL is also really great, and has the perspective of having 2 dd's that are quite a few years older.

Top things about MIL:

1. She loves to take care of family. Whether we're visiting her or she's visiting us, she loves to cook for us, play with dd, just pamper us.

2. She's the ultimate grandma, doesn't let the grandkids get away with too much, but otherwise very nurturing.

The biggest niggle?

She doesn't quite see eye-to-eye with Dh and me about our parenting. We do CIO which she doesn't approve of. She thinks that if a baby cries too hard they could get a hernia, or become bad-tempered children. When we were visiting her last week, I had to nurse dd down for every nap and at bedtime, and every time she woke up because I couldn't let her cry. She asked why don't we try lying down with her for a while until she falls asleep (how? in her crib?). When we explained that cosleeping just doesn't work with dd because she thinks it's playtime outside of her crib it just didn't sink in. One night she was urging us to go on a date and leave her with dd. I had planned to pump so I'd have a bottle but it just didn't work out so we told her we didn't have any milk on hand in case dd woke up (we were going to leave after putting her to bed, and the night before dd woke up 45 minutes later), so she said, well how about formula. Dh said we don't have anything like that, and she said well you can just buy it at the market. To which I said very emphatically, no I'm not giving her formula just so we can go on a date. Well, she insisted she could handle it so we went. We called her after dinner and it turned out DD woke up right after we left and refused to go back to sleep. So we rushed home, and I nursed her down. Afterwards MIL tells me she was telling Dh that we need to find a substitute for me, like a paci, or warm milk or something. Dh already told her that DD doesn't take a paci, and she knew about the milk thing. Then she says, what about regular milk or honey (?!). Then she came back to the "most babies love to cuddle with the parents in bed. You should really try that." Then Dh said she had always slept in her own bed, so now sleeping with us was irksome or ineffective. To which she said, "oh since you cut it off early, now it won't work. Because most babies blah blah blah." I suppose she was inferring that dd was abnormal because she didn't. Then she asks if I know how the dd of a neighbor (same age) sleeps. I knew they must cosleep because they are very AP. And she goes on about the super bed that grandpa built for the entire family of 4. Gaaaaaaa!!! She's a wonderful lady, and I love her, but on this subject she drives me nuts, and Dh also. He maintains it's better not to discuss these things with her because our opinion never sinks in, so she keeps repeating herself, and she's always thinking that she's right. Luckily he's happy to protect me and do all the yelling necessary.

It's not really that bad, esp. since we only see her once or twice a year. And most of the visit is always happy. I'm lucky really :-)

[maestramommy]

My MIL loves me and has from the day we met. It was hard not to because as far as spec go I'm everything she could've asked for in a DIL (same race, religion, etc). She has loved DD since she was born, and I know I can trust her to take care of her in the 2 short times we've left Dd with her. My SIL is also really great, and has the perspective of having 2 dd's that are quite a few years older.

Top things about MIL:

1. She loves to take care of family. Whether we're visiting her or she's visiting us, she loves to cook for us, play with dd, just pamper us.

2. She's the ultimate grandma, doesn't let the grandkids get away with too much, but otherwise very nurturing.

The biggest niggle?

She doesn't quite see eye-to-eye with Dh and me about our parenting. We do CIO which she doesn't approve of. She thinks that if a baby cries too hard they could get a hernia, or become bad-tempered children. When we were visiting her last week, I had to nurse dd down for every nap and at bedtime, and every time she woke up because I couldn't let her cry. She asked why don't we try lying down with her for a while until she falls asleep (how? in her crib?). When we explained that cosleeping just doesn't work with dd because she thinks it's playtime outside of her crib it just didn't sink in. One night she was urging us to go on a date and leave her with dd. I had planned to pump so I'd have a bottle but it just didn't work out so we told her we didn't have any milk on hand in case dd woke up (we were going to leave after putting her to bed, and the night before dd woke up 45 minutes later), so she said, well how about formula. Dh said we don't have anything like that, and she said well you can just buy it at the market. To which I said very emphatically, no I'm not giving her formula just so we can go on a date. Well, she insisted she could handle it so we went. We called her after dinner and it turned out DD woke up right after we left and refused to go back to sleep. So we rushed home, and I nursed her down. Afterwards MIL tells me she was telling Dh that we need to find a substitute for me, like a paci, or warm milk or something. Dh already told her that DD doesn't take a paci, and she knew about the milk thing. Then she says, what about regular milk or honey (?!). Then she came back to the "most babies love to cuddle with the parents in bed. You should really try that." Then Dh said she had always slept in her own bed, so now sleeping with us was irksome or ineffective. To which she said, "oh since you cut it off early, now it won't work. Because most babies blah blah blah." I suppose she was inferring that dd was abnormal because she didn't. Then she asks if I know how the dd of a neighbor (same age) sleeps. I knew they must cosleep because they are very AP. And she goes on about the super bed that grandpa built for the entire family of 4. Gaaaaaaa!!! She's a wonderful lady, and I love her, but on this subject she drives me nuts, and Dh also. He maintains it's better not to discuss these things with her because our opinion never sinks in, so she keeps repeating herself, and she's always thinking that she's right. Luckily he's happy to protect me and do all the yelling necessary.

It's not really that bad, esp. since we only see her once or twice a year. And most of the visit is always happy. I'm lucky really :-)

[maestramommy]

My MIL loves me and has from the day we met. It was hard not to because as far as spec go I'm everything she could've asked for in a DIL (same race, religion, etc). She has loved DD since she was born, and I know I can trust her to take care of her in the 2 short times we've left Dd with her. My SIL is also really great, and has the perspective of having 2 dd's that are quite a few years older.

Top things about MIL:

1. She loves to take care of family. Whether we're visiting her or she's visiting us, she loves to cook for us, play with dd, just pamper us.

2. She's the ultimate grandma, doesn't let the grandkids get away with too much, but otherwise very nurturing.

The biggest niggle?

She doesn't quite see eye-to-eye with Dh and me about our parenting. We do CIO which she doesn't approve of. She thinks that if a baby cries too hard they could get a hernia, or become bad-tempered children. When we were visiting her last week, I had to nurse dd down for every nap and at bedtime, and every time she woke up because I couldn't let her cry. She asked why don't we try lying down with her for a while until she falls asleep (how? in her crib?). When we explained that cosleeping just doesn't work with dd because she thinks it's playtime outside of her crib it just didn't sink in. One night she was urging us to go on a date and leave her with dd. I had planned to pump so I'd have a bottle but it just didn't work out so we told her we didn't have any milk on hand in case dd woke up (we were going to leave after putting her to bed, and the night before dd woke up 45 minutes later), so she said, well how about formula. Dh said we don't have anything like that, and she said well you can just buy it at the market. To which I said very emphatically, no I'm not giving her formula just so we can go on a date. Well, she insisted she could handle it so we went. We called her after dinner and it turned out DD woke up right after we left and refused to go back to sleep. So we rushed home, and I nursed her down. Afterwards MIL tells me she was telling Dh that we need to find a substitute for me, like a paci, or warm milk or something. Dh already told her that DD doesn't take a paci, and she knew about the milk thing. Then she says, what about regular milk or honey (?!). Then she came back to the "most babies love to cuddle with the parents in bed. You should really try that." Then Dh said she had always slept in her own bed, so now sleeping with us was irksome or ineffective. To which she said, "oh since you cut it off early, now it won't work. Because most babies blah blah blah." I suppose she was inferring that dd was abnormal because she didn't. Then she asks if I know how the dd of a neighbor (same age) sleeps. I knew they must cosleep because they are very AP. And she goes on about the super bed that grandpa built for the entire family of 4. Gaaaaaaa!!! She's a wonderful lady, and I love her, but on this subject she drives me nuts, and Dh also. He maintains it's better not to discuss these things with her because our opinion never sinks in, so she keeps repeating herself, and she's always thinking that she's right. Luckily he's happy to protect me and do all the yelling necessary.

It's not really that bad, esp. since we only see her once or twice a year. And most of the visit is always happy. I'm lucky really :-)

[maestramommy]

My MIL loves me and has from the day we met. It was hard not to because as far as spec go I'm everything she could've asked for in a DIL (same race, religion, etc). She has loved DD since she was born, and I know I can trust her to take care of her in the 2 short times we've left Dd with her. My SIL is also really great, and has the perspective of having 2 dd's that are quite a few years older.

Top things about MIL:

1. She loves to take care of family. Whether we're visiting her or she's visiting us, she loves to cook for us, play with dd, just pamper us.

2. She's the ultimate grandma, doesn't let the grandkids get away with too much, but otherwise very nurturing.

The biggest niggle?

She doesn't quite see eye-to-eye with Dh and me about our parenting. We do CIO which she doesn't approve of. She thinks that if a baby cries too hard they could get a hernia, or become bad-tempered children. When we were visiting her last week, I had to nurse dd down for every nap and at bedtime, and every time she woke up because I couldn't let her cry. She asked why don't we try lying down with her for a while until she falls asleep (how? in her crib?). When we explained that cosleeping just doesn't work with dd because she thinks it's playtime outside of her crib it just didn't sink in. One night she was urging us to go on a date and leave her with dd. I had planned to pump so I'd have a bottle but it just didn't work out so we told her we didn't have any milk on hand in case dd woke up (we were going to leave after putting her to bed, and the night before dd woke up 45 minutes later), so she said, well how about formula. Dh said we don't have anything like that, and she said well you can just buy it at the market. To which I said very emphatically, no I'm not giving her formula just so we can go on a date. Well, she insisted she could handle it so we went. We called her after dinner and it turned out DD woke up right after we left and refused to go back to sleep. So we rushed home, and I nursed her down. Afterwards MIL tells me she was telling Dh that we need to find a substitute for me, like a paci, or warm milk or something. Dh already told her that DD doesn't take a paci, and she knew about the milk thing. Then she says, what about regular milk or honey (?!). Then she came back to the "most babies love to cuddle with the parents in bed. You should really try that." Then Dh said she had always slept in her own bed, so now sleeping with us was irksome or ineffective. To which she said, "oh since you cut it off early, now it won't work. Because most babies blah blah blah." I suppose she was inferring that dd was abnormal because she didn't. Then she asks if I know how the dd of a neighbor (same age) sleeps. I knew they must cosleep because they are very AP. And she goes on about the super bed that grandpa built for the entire family of 4. Gaaaaaaa!!! She's a wonderful lady, and I love her, but on this subject she drives me nuts, and Dh also. He maintains it's better not to discuss these things with her because our opinion never sinks in, so she keeps repeating herself, and she's always thinking that she's right. Luckily he's happy to protect me and do all the yelling necessary.

It's not really that bad, esp. since we only see her once or twice a year. And most of the visit is always happy. I'm lucky really :-)

[cleo27]

>I cannot say I hate my MIL but I dislike her intensely. She
>is selfish, self absorbed, and her priorities and values are
>completely opposite to mine. She thrives on pity so she loves
>to be a victim. >

This sounds a lot like my relationship with my MIL, except mine thrives on guilt trips. She lays them on DH all the time and he reacts to every single one, even weeks or months after the fact. We just had an argument about it last night. :(


>Then there is the religious differences we have. Basically I
>think anyone can believe in whatever they want as long as they
>don't try to push their beliefs onto me. Well... let's just
>say she is the complete opposite and she is not respectful of
>our differences.


This also sounds like MIL. This is usually what she uses to upset DH and make him feel guilty. She and his brother (a very conservative minister) have made it clear that they think we are going to he**, just because we do not believe the same exact things that they do. It is very sad and unfortunately the relationship with them is very strained. I am truly to the point that I would rather not have contact with them, but I muddle through because DH feels obligated.



I really love FIL. He has been like a second father to me. Unfortunately, I think DH feels guilty to be close to him, because he divorced his mother about 20 years ago and married another woman. Both MIL and FIL are in happy relationships at this time, and have been for over 10 years, but DH has so many issues relating to their divorce.

I was ready to write my own post about this topic last night but wound up getting into an argument with DH and going to be much too late, as it was.

sorry for the rambling. Thanks for reading.

[cleo27]

>I cannot say I hate my MIL but I dislike her intensely. She
>is selfish, self absorbed, and her priorities and values are
>completely opposite to mine. She thrives on pity so she loves
>to be a victim. >

This sounds a lot like my relationship with my MIL, except mine thrives on guilt trips. She lays them on DH all the time and he reacts to every single one, even weeks or months after the fact. We just had an argument about it last night. :(


>Then there is the religious differences we have. Basically I
>think anyone can believe in whatever they want as long as they
>don't try to push their beliefs onto me. Well... let's just
>say she is the complete opposite and she is not respectful of
>our differences.


This also sounds like MIL. This is usually what she uses to upset DH and make him feel guilty. She and his brother (a very conservative minister) have made it clear that they think we are going to he**, just because we do not believe the same exact things that they do. It is very sad and unfortunately the relationship with them is very strained. I am truly to the point that I would rather not have contact with them, but I muddle through because DH feels obligated.



I really love FIL. He has been like a second father to me. Unfortunately, I think DH feels guilty to be close to him, because he divorced his mother about 20 years ago and married another woman. Both MIL and FIL are in happy relationships at this time, and have been for over 10 years, but DH has so many issues relating to their divorce.

I was ready to write my own post about this topic last night but wound up getting into an argument with DH and going to be much too late, as it was.

sorry for the rambling. Thanks for reading.

[cleo27]

>I cannot say I hate my MIL but I dislike her intensely. She
>is selfish, self absorbed, and her priorities and values are
>completely opposite to mine. She thrives on pity so she loves
>to be a victim. >

This sounds a lot like my relationship with my MIL, except mine thrives on guilt trips. She lays them on DH all the time and he reacts to every single one, even weeks or months after the fact. We just had an argument about it last night. :(


>Then there is the religious differences we have. Basically I
>think anyone can believe in whatever they want as long as they
>don't try to push their beliefs onto me. Well... let's just
>say she is the complete opposite and she is not respectful of
>our differences.


This also sounds like MIL. This is usually what she uses to upset DH and make him feel guilty. She and his brother (a very conservative minister) have made it clear that they think we are going to he**, just because we do not believe the same exact things that they do. It is very sad and unfortunately the relationship with them is very strained. I am truly to the point that I would rather not have contact with them, but I muddle through because DH feels obligated.



I really love FIL. He has been like a second father to me. Unfortunately, I think DH feels guilty to be close to him, because he divorced his mother about 20 years ago and married another woman. Both MIL and FIL are in happy relationships at this time, and have been for over 10 years, but DH has so many issues relating to their divorce.

I was ready to write my own post about this topic last night but wound up getting into an argument with DH and going to be much too late, as it was.

sorry for the rambling. Thanks for reading.

[cleo27]

>I cannot say I hate my MIL but I dislike her intensely. She
>is selfish, self absorbed, and her priorities and values are
>completely opposite to mine. She thrives on pity so she loves
>to be a victim. >

This sounds a lot like my relationship with my MIL, except mine thrives on guilt trips. She lays them on DH all the time and he reacts to every single one, even weeks or months after the fact. We just had an argument about it last night. :(


>Then there is the religious differences we have. Basically I
>think anyone can believe in whatever they want as long as they
>don't try to push their beliefs onto me. Well... let's just
>say she is the complete opposite and she is not respectful of
>our differences.


This also sounds like MIL. This is usually what she uses to upset DH and make him feel guilty. She and his brother (a very conservative minister) have made it clear that they think we are going to he**, just because we do not believe the same exact things that they do. It is very sad and unfortunately the relationship with them is very strained. I am truly to the point that I would rather not have contact with them, but I muddle through because DH feels obligated.



I really love FIL. He has been like a second father to me. Unfortunately, I think DH feels guilty to be close to him, because he divorced his mother about 20 years ago and married another woman. Both MIL and FIL are in happy relationships at this time, and have been for over 10 years, but DH has so many issues relating to their divorce.

I was ready to write my own post about this topic last night but wound up getting into an argument with DH and going to be much too late, as it was.

sorry for the rambling. Thanks for reading.

[cleo27]

>I cannot say I hate my MIL but I dislike her intensely. She
>is selfish, self absorbed, and her priorities and values are
>completely opposite to mine. She thrives on pity so she loves
>to be a victim. >

This sounds a lot like my relationship with my MIL, except mine thrives on guilt trips. She lays them on DH all the time and he reacts to every single one, even weeks or months after the fact. We just had an argument about it last night. :(


>Then there is the religious differences we have. Basically I
>think anyone can believe in whatever they want as long as they
>don't try to push their beliefs onto me. Well... let's just
>say she is the complete opposite and she is not respectful of
>our differences.


This also sounds like MIL. This is usually what she uses to upset DH and make him feel guilty. She and his brother (a very conservative minister) have made it clear that they think we are going to he**, just because we do not believe the same exact things that they do. It is very sad and unfortunately the relationship with them is very strained. I am truly to the point that I would rather not have contact with them, but I muddle through because DH feels obligated.



I really love FIL. He has been like a second father to me. Unfortunately, I think DH feels guilty to be close to him, because he divorced his mother about 20 years ago and married another woman. Both MIL and FIL are in happy relationships at this time, and have been for over 10 years, but DH has so many issues relating to their divorce.

I was ready to write my own post about this topic last night but wound up getting into an argument with DH and going to be much too late, as it was.

sorry for the rambling. Thanks for reading.

[cleo27]

>I cannot say I hate my MIL but I dislike her intensely. She
>is selfish, self absorbed, and her priorities and values are
>completely opposite to mine. She thrives on pity so she loves
>to be a victim. >

This sounds a lot like my relationship with my MIL, except mine thrives on guilt trips. She lays them on DH all the time and he reacts to every single one, even weeks or months after the fact. We just had an argument about it last night. :(


>Then there is the religious differences we have. Basically I
>think anyone can believe in whatever they want as long as they
>don't try to push their beliefs onto me. Well... let's just
>say she is the complete opposite and she is not respectful of
>our differences.


This also sounds like MIL. This is usually what she uses to upset DH and make him feel guilty. She and his brother (a very conservative minister) have made it clear that they think we are going to he**, just because we do not believe the same exact things that they do. It is very sad and unfortunately the relationship with them is very strained. I am truly to the point that I would rather not have contact with them, but I muddle through because DH feels obligated.



I really love FIL. He has been like a second father to me. Unfortunately, I think DH feels guilty to be close to him, because he divorced his mother about 20 years ago and married another woman. Both MIL and FIL are in happy relationships at this time, and have been for over 10 years, but DH has so many issues relating to their divorce.

I was ready to write my own post about this topic last night but wound up getting into an argument with DH and going to be much too late, as it was.

sorry for the rambling. Thanks for reading.

[cleo27]

>I cannot say I hate my MIL but I dislike her intensely. She
>is selfish, self absorbed, and her priorities and values are
>completely opposite to mine. She thrives on pity so she loves
>to be a victim. >

This sounds a lot like my relationship with my MIL, except mine thrives on guilt trips. She lays them on DH all the time and he reacts to every single one, even weeks or months after the fact. We just had an argument about it last night. :(


>Then there is the religious differences we have. Basically I
>think anyone can believe in whatever they want as long as they
>don't try to push their beliefs onto me. Well... let's just
>say she is the complete opposite and she is not respectful of
>our differences.


This also sounds like MIL. This is usually what she uses to upset DH and make him feel guilty. She and his brother (a very conservative minister) have made it clear that they think we are going to he**, just because we do not believe the same exact things that they do. It is very sad and unfortunately the relationship with them is very strained. I am truly to the point that I would rather not have contact with them, but I muddle through because DH feels obligated.



I really love FIL. He has been like a second father to me. Unfortunately, I think DH feels guilty to be close to him, because he divorced his mother about 20 years ago and married another woman. Both MIL and FIL are in happy relationships at this time, and have been for over 10 years, but DH has so many issues relating to their divorce.

I was ready to write my own post about this topic last night but wound up getting into an argument with DH and going to be much too late, as it was.

sorry for the rambling. Thanks for reading.

[cleo27]

>I cannot say I hate my MIL but I dislike her intensely. She
>is selfish, self absorbed, and her priorities and values are
>completely opposite to mine. She thrives on pity so she loves
>to be a victim. >

This sounds a lot like my relationship with my MIL, except mine thrives on guilt trips. She lays them on DH all the time and he reacts to every single one, even weeks or months after the fact. We just had an argument about it last night. :(


>Then there is the religious differences we have. Basically I
>think anyone can believe in whatever they want as long as they
>don't try to push their beliefs onto me. Well... let's just
>say she is the complete opposite and she is not respectful of
>our differences.


This also sounds like MIL. This is usually what she uses to upset DH and make him feel guilty. She and his brother (a very conservative minister) have made it clear that they think we are going to he**, just because we do not believe the same exact things that they do. It is very sad and unfortunately the relationship with them is very strained. I am truly to the point that I would rather not have contact with them, but I muddle through because DH feels obligated.



I really love FIL. He has been like a second father to me. Unfortunately, I think DH feels guilty to be close to him, because he divorced his mother about 20 years ago and married another woman. Both MIL and FIL are in happy relationships at this time, and have been for over 10 years, but DH has so many issues relating to their divorce.

I was ready to write my own post about this topic last night but wound up getting into an argument with DH and going to be much too late, as it was.

sorry for the rambling. Thanks for reading.

[cleo27]

>I cannot say I hate my MIL but I dislike her intensely. She
>is selfish, self absorbed, and her priorities and values are
>completely opposite to mine. She thrives on pity so she loves
>to be a victim. >

This sounds a lot like my relationship with my MIL, except mine thrives on guilt trips. She lays them on DH all the time and he reacts to every single one, even weeks or months after the fact. We just had an argument about it last night. :(


>Then there is the religious differences we have. Basically I
>think anyone can believe in whatever they want as long as they
>don't try to push their beliefs onto me. Well... let's just
>say she is the complete opposite and she is not respectful of
>our differences.


This also sounds like MIL. This is usually what she uses to upset DH and make him feel guilty. She and his brother (a very conservative minister) have made it clear that they think we are going to he**, just because we do not believe the same exact things that they do. It is very sad and unfortunately the relationship with them is very strained. I am truly to the point that I would rather not have contact with them, but I muddle through because DH feels obligated.



I really love FIL. He has been like a second father to me. Unfortunately, I think DH feels guilty to be close to him, because he divorced his mother about 20 years ago and married another woman. Both MIL and FIL are in happy relationships at this time, and have been for over 10 years, but DH has so many issues relating to their divorce.

I was ready to write my own post about this topic last night but wound up getting into an argument with DH and going to be much too late, as it was.

sorry for the rambling. Thanks for reading.

[glamourgirlpink]

I neither love nor hate them...I guess I'd have to say I try and tolerate them...Okay, deleted the rest because I felt bad! :(

[glamourgirlpink]

I neither love nor hate them...I guess I'd have to say I try and tolerate them...Okay, deleted the rest because I felt bad! :(

[glamourgirlpink]

I neither love nor hate them...I guess I'd have to say I try and tolerate them...Okay, deleted the rest because I felt bad! :(

[glamourgirlpink]

I neither love nor hate them...I guess I'd have to say I try and tolerate them...Okay, deleted the rest because I felt bad! :(

[glamourgirlpink]

I neither love nor hate them...I guess I'd have to say I try and tolerate them...Okay, deleted the rest because I felt bad! :(

[glamourgirlpink]

I neither love nor hate them...I guess I'd have to say I try and tolerate them...Okay, deleted the rest because I felt bad! :(

[glamourgirlpink]

I neither love nor hate them...I guess I'd have to say I try and tolerate them...Okay, deleted the rest because I felt bad! :(

[glamourgirlpink]

I neither love nor hate them...I guess I'd have to say I try and tolerate them...Okay, deleted the rest because I felt bad! :(

[glamourgirlpink]

I neither love nor hate them...I guess I'd have to say I try and tolerate them...Okay, deleted the rest because I felt bad! :(

[nov04]

Mostly love, sometimes intensely dislike ils. They've been very good to us and are always there for us when we need them. I can't stand that I have to justify so many parenting decisions that are mine to make. They also say whatever they feel like to me which sometimes hurts. They love dd unconditionally and treat her like gold. They're her legal guardians in case we can't care for her until younger ppl we know become more established.

My parents OTOH seem quite loving on appearance but can't be depended on. they don't help out much and I would NEVER leave dd alone with them. It's not that they're malicious, they just can't be bothered.

[nov04]

Mostly love, sometimes intensely dislike ils. They've been very good to us and are always there for us when we need them. I can't stand that I have to justify so many parenting decisions that are mine to make. They also say whatever they feel like to me which sometimes hurts. They love dd unconditionally and treat her like gold. They're her legal guardians in case we can't care for her until younger ppl we know become more established.

My parents OTOH seem quite loving on appearance but can't be depended on. they don't help out much and I would NEVER leave dd alone with them. It's not that they're malicious, they just can't be bothered.

[nov04]

Mostly love, sometimes intensely dislike ils. They've been very good to us and are always there for us when we need them. I can't stand that I have to justify so many parenting decisions that are mine to make. They also say whatever they feel like to me which sometimes hurts. They love dd unconditionally and treat her like gold. They're her legal guardians in case we can't care for her until younger ppl we know become more established.

My parents OTOH seem quite loving on appearance but can't be depended on. they don't help out much and I would NEVER leave dd alone with them. It's not that they're malicious, they just can't be bothered.

[nov04]

Mostly love, sometimes intensely dislike ils. They've been very good to us and are always there for us when we need them. I can't stand that I have to justify so many parenting decisions that are mine to make. They also say whatever they feel like to me which sometimes hurts. They love dd unconditionally and treat her like gold. They're her legal guardians in case we can't care for her until younger ppl we know become more established.

My parents OTOH seem quite loving on appearance but can't be depended on. they don't help out much and I would NEVER leave dd alone with them. It's not that they're malicious, they just can't be bothered.

[nov04]

Mostly love, sometimes intensely dislike ils. They've been very good to us and are always there for us when we need them. I can't stand that I have to justify so many parenting decisions that are mine to make. They also say whatever they feel like to me which sometimes hurts. They love dd unconditionally and treat her like gold. They're her legal guardians in case we can't care for her until younger ppl we know become more established.

My parents OTOH seem quite loving on appearance but can't be depended on. they don't help out much and I would NEVER leave dd alone with them. It's not that they're malicious, they just can't be bothered.

[nov04]

Mostly love, sometimes intensely dislike ils. They've been very good to us and are always there for us when we need them. I can't stand that I have to justify so many parenting decisions that are mine to make. They also say whatever they feel like to me which sometimes hurts. They love dd unconditionally and treat her like gold. They're her legal guardians in case we can't care for her until younger ppl we know become more established.

My parents OTOH seem quite loving on appearance but can't be depended on. they don't help out much and I would NEVER leave dd alone with them. It's not that they're malicious, they just can't be bothered.

[nov04]

Mostly love, sometimes intensely dislike ils. They've been very good to us and are always there for us when we need them. I can't stand that I have to justify so many parenting decisions that are mine to make. They also say whatever they feel like to me which sometimes hurts. They love dd unconditionally and treat her like gold. They're her legal guardians in case we can't care for her until younger ppl we know become more established.

My parents OTOH seem quite loving on appearance but can't be depended on. they don't help out much and I would NEVER leave dd alone with them. It's not that they're malicious, they just can't be bothered.

[nov04]

Mostly love, sometimes intensely dislike ils. They've been very good to us and are always there for us when we need them. I can't stand that I have to justify so many parenting decisions that are mine to make. They also say whatever they feel like to me which sometimes hurts. They love dd unconditionally and treat her like gold. They're her legal guardians in case we can't care for her until younger ppl we know become more established.

My parents OTOH seem quite loving on appearance but can't be depended on. they don't help out much and I would NEVER leave dd alone with them. It's not that they're malicious, they just can't be bothered.

[nov04]

Mostly love, sometimes intensely dislike ils. They've been very good to us and are always there for us when we need them. I can't stand that I have to justify so many parenting decisions that are mine to make. They also say whatever they feel like to me which sometimes hurts. They love dd unconditionally and treat her like gold. They're her legal guardians in case we can't care for her until younger ppl we know become more established.

My parents OTOH seem quite loving on appearance but can't be depended on. they don't help out much and I would NEVER leave dd alone with them. It's not that they're malicious, they just can't be bothered.

[niccig]

I did like them, but now after having DS, I tolerate them. MIL is passive aggressive and until DS was born she was fine, but now she's got more to say. My mother is very direct and I prefer that over snide comments. I was called Mrs Gerber for making DS's food, DS eats a wide variety of food, more than MIL actually, and she gleefully says that that will change as he gets older. I hope it doesn't just to stick it to her. FIL is emotionally withdrawn and doesn't say much, and apparently never has. I don't have to deal with them much. DH talks to them every week, but he doesn't always tell them the funny things DS has done. She's always surprised to learn something months later. I suppose I could call, but I won't. I've got enough members of my own family, so I leave MIL/FIL to DH. Easier that way, and I figure the less she knows the fewer snide comments I get.

Nicci

[niccig]

I did like them, but now after having DS, I tolerate them. MIL is passive aggressive and until DS was born she was fine, but now she's got more to say. My mother is very direct and I prefer that over snide comments. I was called Mrs Gerber for making DS's food, DS eats a wide variety of food, more than MIL actually, and she gleefully says that that will change as he gets older. I hope it doesn't just to stick it to her. FIL is emotionally withdrawn and doesn't say much, and apparently never has. I don't have to deal with them much. DH talks to them every week, but he doesn't always tell them the funny things DS has done. She's always surprised to learn something months later. I suppose I could call, but I won't. I've got enough members of my own family, so I leave MIL/FIL to DH. Easier that way, and I figure the less she knows the fewer snide comments I get.

Nicci

[niccig]

I did like them, but now after having DS, I tolerate them. MIL is passive aggressive and until DS was born she was fine, but now she's got more to say. My mother is very direct and I prefer that over snide comments. I was called Mrs Gerber for making DS's food, DS eats a wide variety of food, more than MIL actually, and she gleefully says that that will change as he gets older. I hope it doesn't just to stick it to her. FIL is emotionally withdrawn and doesn't say much, and apparently never has. I don't have to deal with them much. DH talks to them every week, but he doesn't always tell them the funny things DS has done. She's always surprised to learn something months later. I suppose I could call, but I won't. I've got enough members of my own family, so I leave MIL/FIL to DH. Easier that way, and I figure the less she knows the fewer snide comments I get.

Nicci

[niccig]

I did like them, but now after having DS, I tolerate them. MIL is passive aggressive and until DS was born she was fine, but now she's got more to say. My mother is very direct and I prefer that over snide comments. I was called Mrs Gerber for making DS's food, DS eats a wide variety of food, more than MIL actually, and she gleefully says that that will change as he gets older. I hope it doesn't just to stick it to her. FIL is emotionally withdrawn and doesn't say much, and apparently never has. I don't have to deal with them much. DH talks to them every week, but he doesn't always tell them the funny things DS has done. She's always surprised to learn something months later. I suppose I could call, but I won't. I've got enough members of my own family, so I leave MIL/FIL to DH. Easier that way, and I figure the less she knows the fewer snide comments I get.

Nicci

[niccig]

I did like them, but now after having DS, I tolerate them. MIL is passive aggressive and until DS was born she was fine, but now she's got more to say. My mother is very direct and I prefer that over snide comments. I was called Mrs Gerber for making DS's food, DS eats a wide variety of food, more than MIL actually, and she gleefully says that that will change as he gets older. I hope it doesn't just to stick it to her. FIL is emotionally withdrawn and doesn't say much, and apparently never has. I don't have to deal with them much. DH talks to them every week, but he doesn't always tell them the funny things DS has done. She's always surprised to learn something months later. I suppose I could call, but I won't. I've got enough members of my own family, so I leave MIL/FIL to DH. Easier that way, and I figure the less she knows the fewer snide comments I get.

Nicci

[niccig]

I did like them, but now after having DS, I tolerate them. MIL is passive aggressive and until DS was born she was fine, but now she's got more to say. My mother is very direct and I prefer that over snide comments. I was called Mrs Gerber for making DS's food, DS eats a wide variety of food, more than MIL actually, and she gleefully says that that will change as he gets older. I hope it doesn't just to stick it to her. FIL is emotionally withdrawn and doesn't say much, and apparently never has. I don't have to deal with them much. DH talks to them every week, but he doesn't always tell them the funny things DS has done. She's always surprised to learn something months later. I suppose I could call, but I won't. I've got enough members of my own family, so I leave MIL/FIL to DH. Easier that way, and I figure the less she knows the fewer snide comments I get.

Nicci

[niccig]

I did like them, but now after having DS, I tolerate them. MIL is passive aggressive and until DS was born she was fine, but now she's got more to say. My mother is very direct and I prefer that over snide comments. I was called Mrs Gerber for making DS's food, DS eats a wide variety of food, more than MIL actually, and she gleefully says that that will change as he gets older. I hope it doesn't just to stick it to her. FIL is emotionally withdrawn and doesn't say much, and apparently never has. I don't have to deal with them much. DH talks to them every week, but he doesn't always tell them the funny things DS has done. She's always surprised to learn something months later. I suppose I could call, but I won't. I've got enough members of my own family, so I leave MIL/FIL to DH. Easier that way, and I figure the less she knows the fewer snide comments I get.

Nicci

[niccig]

I did like them, but now after having DS, I tolerate them. MIL is passive aggressive and until DS was born she was fine, but now she's got more to say. My mother is very direct and I prefer that over snide comments. I was called Mrs Gerber for making DS's food, DS eats a wide variety of food, more than MIL actually, and she gleefully says that that will change as he gets older. I hope it doesn't just to stick it to her. FIL is emotionally withdrawn and doesn't say much, and apparently never has. I don't have to deal with them much. DH talks to them every week, but he doesn't always tell them the funny things DS has done. She's always surprised to learn something months later. I suppose I could call, but I won't. I've got enough members of my own family, so I leave MIL/FIL to DH. Easier that way, and I figure the less she knows the fewer snide comments I get.

Nicci

[niccig]

I did like them, but now after having DS, I tolerate them. MIL is passive aggressive and until DS was born she was fine, but now she's got more to say. My mother is very direct and I prefer that over snide comments. I was called Mrs Gerber for making DS's food, DS eats a wide variety of food, more than MIL actually, and she gleefully says that that will change as he gets older. I hope it doesn't just to stick it to her. FIL is emotionally withdrawn and doesn't say much, and apparently never has. I don't have to deal with them much. DH talks to them every week, but he doesn't always tell them the funny things DS has done. She's always surprised to learn something months later. I suppose I could call, but I won't. I've got enough members of my own family, so I leave MIL/FIL to DH. Easier that way, and I figure the less she knows the fewer snide comments I get.

Nicci

[glamourgirlpink]

That sounds just like my situation! I agree, better to just let DH deal with it...And yes, being direct is much better than snide comments!!! :)

[glamourgirlpink]

That sounds just like my situation! I agree, better to just let DH deal with it...And yes, being direct is much better than snide comments!!! :)

[glamourgirlpink]

That sounds just like my situation! I agree, better to just let DH deal with it...And yes, being direct is much better than snide comments!!! :)

[glamourgirlpink]

That sounds just like my situation! I agree, better to just let DH deal with it...And yes, being direct is much better than snide comments!!! :)

[glamourgirlpink]

That sounds just like my situation! I agree, better to just let DH deal with it...And yes, being direct is much better than snide comments!!! :)

[glamourgirlpink]

That sounds just like my situation! I agree, better to just let DH deal with it...And yes, being direct is much better than snide comments!!! :)

[glamourgirlpink]

That sounds just like my situation! I agree, better to just let DH deal with it...And yes, being direct is much better than snide comments!!! :)