Radosti
10-10-2006, 08:13 PM
Doing stuff for others always makes me feel good. That's why I donated so much breastmilk, that's why I run a dog rescue, that's why I gave away a ton of formula coupons on craigslist. Not only does it feel good, but it's good karma too.
Still, today my sense of being a "good person" was a rocked. Today at work, we had a big celebration. We had launched 4 new vaccines in 9 months. That's quite an achievement and a culmination of a lot of work on the part of a lot of people. So, they had a celebration with a raffle giveaway thing. Each person got 10 raffle tickets and got to walk around this table and put their tickets in for different prizes. They did this 4 times to accomodate different shifts. I ended up going to the last one because that's what my schedule allowed. My husband didn't make any of them because he was too busy.
I walked around and put my tickets in for stuff that I thought we both would like. However, for a lot of it, I kept my family in mind. One of the prizes was a digital camera (we already have one, but I could give the new one to my parents), another was an Ipod Nano (I have a regular Ipod, so this one would likely have been for DH). I used up 9 tickets like that. I had one left and I walked up to a golfing prize - a round of golf for 2 and some golf balls. This one has nothing to do with me, but I thought DH would be very happy if I won this), so I put in my last ticket.
They gave a few speeches and I ran up to health services to pump, making it back in time for the prize giveaway. I got there and one of my friends was very excited to tell me that I won something. Someone else piped in saying it was the golf thing. I went up to the podium afterwards and confirmed it was the golf package. So, they handed it to me. I got a decorated basket with golf balls in it and a gift bag with a gift certificate and some more golf balls. I looked in the bag, but didn't open the basket.
Hubby opened both at home and says, "I think they gave you two prizes!" Sure enough, once we opened the basket, it contained the same amt of golf balls as the bag and a second gift certificate for the same amt. I honestly contemplated keeping it, thinking "How cool would it be for him to take his entire golf foursome of buddies to play one day!" He works hard, is completing his MBA and we've been extemely busy. He talks to his friends, but they've not been out golfing together more than twice this year.
Then, I returned to my normal self, and realized that the second prize was not mine. In fact, since two of the giveaways were back to back, someone else may have won the same package and wasn't there to pick it up. And they may have given me both and the other person will be waiting to get their prize. So, I am taking the giftbag one back tomorrow (since the basket is no longer pretty).
Still, I really really wanted to keep the second prize. How bad of a person am I??? That's all. I just didn't like myself there for a while. But I still wanted to keep it for DH. I guess it would have been much easier to give it back if this was for myself. Still...
Still, today my sense of being a "good person" was a rocked. Today at work, we had a big celebration. We had launched 4 new vaccines in 9 months. That's quite an achievement and a culmination of a lot of work on the part of a lot of people. So, they had a celebration with a raffle giveaway thing. Each person got 10 raffle tickets and got to walk around this table and put their tickets in for different prizes. They did this 4 times to accomodate different shifts. I ended up going to the last one because that's what my schedule allowed. My husband didn't make any of them because he was too busy.
I walked around and put my tickets in for stuff that I thought we both would like. However, for a lot of it, I kept my family in mind. One of the prizes was a digital camera (we already have one, but I could give the new one to my parents), another was an Ipod Nano (I have a regular Ipod, so this one would likely have been for DH). I used up 9 tickets like that. I had one left and I walked up to a golfing prize - a round of golf for 2 and some golf balls. This one has nothing to do with me, but I thought DH would be very happy if I won this), so I put in my last ticket.
They gave a few speeches and I ran up to health services to pump, making it back in time for the prize giveaway. I got there and one of my friends was very excited to tell me that I won something. Someone else piped in saying it was the golf thing. I went up to the podium afterwards and confirmed it was the golf package. So, they handed it to me. I got a decorated basket with golf balls in it and a gift bag with a gift certificate and some more golf balls. I looked in the bag, but didn't open the basket.
Hubby opened both at home and says, "I think they gave you two prizes!" Sure enough, once we opened the basket, it contained the same amt of golf balls as the bag and a second gift certificate for the same amt. I honestly contemplated keeping it, thinking "How cool would it be for him to take his entire golf foursome of buddies to play one day!" He works hard, is completing his MBA and we've been extemely busy. He talks to his friends, but they've not been out golfing together more than twice this year.
Then, I returned to my normal self, and realized that the second prize was not mine. In fact, since two of the giveaways were back to back, someone else may have won the same package and wasn't there to pick it up. And they may have given me both and the other person will be waiting to get their prize. So, I am taking the giftbag one back tomorrow (since the basket is no longer pretty).
Still, I really really wanted to keep the second prize. How bad of a person am I??? That's all. I just didn't like myself there for a while. But I still wanted to keep it for DH. I guess it would have been much easier to give it back if this was for myself. Still...