Sigh....people.

[buddyleebaby]

This is sort of petty but I am just getting a little annoyed with people in general. I am so sick of having the same conversation day in and day out. WHY do people feel the need to say the things they do?
I know there is no ill intent but still.

I have this conversation at LEAST twice a day:

Person: Oh is that twins?
Me: No, not twins. Just sisters.
Person: Oh WOW! Back to back, huh?
Me: They're around 16 months apart.
Person: But you're done now, right?
or
Well, you were a baby making machine for awhile.
or
That's the way to do it. Have 'em close and be done with it.
or
Oh my God. They are pretty much twins, really.

ETC ETC ETC

Blech.
I feel better....at least until I have to go out again.

[dawell0]

Ahh, hugs! People are ridiculous, I very much agree. Obviously it isn't twins when one is an infant and the other walks, so they are stupid anyhow. I think that people are just so used to everyone being very boring and having 2 kids about 2-3 years apart. You have to think that most people don't do extended bfing like you did and wouldn't even understand it, particularly people dumb enough to say something like that. The most that I would ever say is--"How cute! In 10 years they will either be best of friends or the worst enemies." I would just smile and say something sort of sarcastic whenever they get to you. Save it in your memory bank. I know that you can think of something, Alicia. (I'm trying to save my brain to focus on having this baby. I won't hijack and complain about all the "You're still pregnant's" that I'm getting either).

[buddyleebaby]

Oh please hijack away!

My brother was 14 days late. My mom said she was going to clock the next person who said "Are you still here?"

[dules]

How about replying "Isn't that nice of you to say! I could not be happier with my girls, thank you!" smile and walk away. :)

I *hate* how nosy people are. When we got suggestions on how to 'help' (just relax, take a vacation, have a glass of wine, etc.) when we were facing IVF I always wanted to respond with a direct question about the interrogator's sex life. ;)


Mary

[table4three]

That's rediculous. Plus, really, folks, so you REALLY think that this toddler and newborn are twins? That's just obnoxious and none of their business, anyhow!

[Wife_and_mommy]

Hugs to you. Listening to people's nonsense can't be easy.






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[Lovingliv]

He,he,he. I am chuckling Alica!
I ALWAYS get comments like that...or RUDER...like "wow, you and hubby must never stop (wink, wink)."

And i too, have gotten the "yeah, get it over with." People are so clueless.....and nosy. Big hugs....

[rlu]

Sympathies! I'm not in that position but my sister and I, although 3.5 yrs apart, are frequently asked by strangers if we're twins. When we respond not, we're accused of lying "yes you are!" Sometimes we comment about our mom's really long labor, but usually just walk off.

[annasmom]

Oh, wow this brings back memories!! I cannot tell you how often I heard that when I had Kieran (16 months apart from Anna) - never got the TWINS thing though!! People are idiots do they not see that Evelyn is an INFANT!!

I must admit when people TOLD me that I "must be done now, right?" I was always speechless. I never knew people could comment on such a sensitive topic to a complete stranger.

Anywho - now it is even ruder. When people find out how many dc I have, and their ages, I hear "How many children DO you have?!" and ALL THE TIME "You are crazy!" I feel like people are looking at me like I am an unwed pregnant teen with 20 children and am living on the street. Um, no.

Oh well.

[bubbaray]

Wow. Just goes to show that most people are ignorant. Uh, a newborn and toddler as twins?? As if it were anyone else's business anyway....

Sigh. People are weird.


Melissa

DD#1: 04/2004

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[jillc]

Hi Denise,

I think your comment was well intended & must have just come out wrong, but I wanted to say that I'm having two kids 2-3 years apart, and I don't think this makes my family "boring" in the slightest.

Regardless of the spacing or the # of kids we're blessed enough to have, I think each one is nothing short of thrilling.

Hope your little one makes his/her arrival soon. :)
Jill

[dawell0]

Jill, Sorry about that--I guess that "boring" was a poor choice of words. I didn't mean that there was anything wrong with that. "Average" is probably closer to what I should have said, or more "that is what people have come to expect". I'm offending everyone left and right today so please don't take it personally (see my question in the lounge for more on that).

[chlobo]

Honestly, I think in situations like this the best thing to do is to come up with an outrageous response. Something like, "Oh yes, and these are only the two I came with. They're actually quads. The others are at home".

Yes, twins - by different fathers.

Yes, it's amazing what great sex will do for you.

You could really have fun with that.

[Melanie]

...

[Melanie]

ahh, support removed. no worries.

[buddyleebaby]

deleted due to pps deletion

[Jenn98]

ITA. We are all moms (or moms to be) who are doing the best we can for our families. If you have nothing nice to say to a post just skip it. It's okay to ask for clarification, but we need each other's support not judgement. JMHO

[denna]

I agree ppl suck! ;) One of DH's good friends wife (wow a mouthful) had twins when her first son was 11months old(!) so that is 3 UNDER one year(!) I cant imagine the comments she gets. I was always amazed at Irish triplets.

And ppl are stupid to say 'twins' HELLO! Its an intant and a near-toddler! Sheesh ppl come on.

(hugs) mamma

[mommy111]

This is with 3 kids? And I've always wanted 5, so now I'm dreading the comments that I'll get (if I do ever have the other 4, as it is right now H and I are getting a divorce, but I'm holding out hope that someday I will have my 5 or6)

[MegND95]

You have my sympathies! My older two kids are 15m apart and when I announced I was pg with #2, when #1 was 6m old, I was frequently told, "Don't you know how that happens???" or even better, "Don't you two know about birth control," when I told people I was pg with #3. Granted my kids are all close in age, but how RUDE!!!

I always wished I had some really fantastic comeback, but typically responded with, "We're very happy and very lucky."

And if it's any comfort, my older two kids are each other's best friends :)

Sorry you have to deal with other people's cluelessness!

[psophia17]

Can I hijack with a discussion my FIL had with me shortly before DS2 was born?

FIL - You're getting snipped when you're in the hospital, right?
ME - No, why would I do that?
FIL - How many kids do you plan to have?
ME - DH and I suck at planning, if I say this is it, we'll probably have more, and if I say we're going to have more, this will probably be it.
FIL - You better get snipped if you don't want more, then.
ME - DH can get snipped if he wants to, I'm not going to.
FIL - It's much easier for women to get snipped than for men.
ME - No, it's not. Even if it was, if DH isn't willing, I'm not willing.
FIL - well you better not diddle, then, or you'll have more in no time.

It went downhill from there, and ended with me just leaving the room while DH gave his dad a look. FIL, btw, has 5 kids from 2 marriages, and both his ex-wife and MIL have been snipped.

Nothing like sex advice from your FIL, don't you think?

[charleneand2]

I feel for you because I get it the other way. i do have twins that are fraternal. This is what I get at least 3 times a day....
"what is the age difference?" "they are not twins, are you sure?" "how come they look nothing alike?".....

I know people are not being mean but it just gets tiresome. I think I am pretty sure that I gave birth to the both of them just 4 minutes apart. They are not identical but I hate to hear "they are NOTHING alike". It makes me feel like they are not even brothers.

Add these comments to all the ones where people ask you if they "are natural". I tell them they are supernatural s watch out if they start to levitate.

People say things all the time that drive me crazy but I know it is not intentional. It is nice to vent though.

Charlene

[buddyleebaby]

>
>
>Add these comments to all the ones where people ask you if
>they "are natural". I tell them they are supernatural s watch
>out if they start to levitate.

>
>Charlene



LMBO!!!! That is the best comeback I have heard in quite a while.
Thanks for the laugh. ; )

[seeks1]

Charlene, thank you so much for the good laugh. I am going to share the supernatural line with my friend who has the same issues with people and her fraternal twins.

[chiqanita]

I get similar remarks on my fraternal twin sons. Every time I go out.

"Twins?"
Me: "Yes"
"You have your hands full"
Me: "Just a little"
Double Trouble
Me: Doubly blessed
They don't look alike.
Me: Nope, that's what fraternal means.
That's the way to do it, have them at the same time and you're done.
Me: <polite smile>
Were you on fertility drugs or do twins run in your family?
Me: They run in both of our families
But I hear they skip a generation
Me: Okay?!

[Alice523]

I want 4 kids and I've learned to keep my mouth shut about my plans. People don't just call you crazy for having them - they call you crazy for thinking about it. I actually answer every question about my future family with my plans for the next baby ("Oh, we'll probably have another when James is 2 or 3...") so that I don't have to *admit* (?!) that I secretly want 4! At my shower, I commented on gender-neutral clothes being useful for future children. Everyone had a good laugh over my use of children vs child - "What, are you planning on having a baseball team, Alice?" Um, no, I just want more than 2..?!

Sorry for the tangent.

To the OP, those comments are totally out of line. You have absolutely beautiful little girls. And they're clearly not twins!