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View Full Version : Came home from date night and mil still had kids up at 11pm!!!!!



elaineandmichaelsmommy
11-18-2006, 01:45 AM
Now don't get me wrong. My mil is a great woman. She loves the kids like crazy.She wanted dd to go to montissori preschool so badly and we couldn't afford it in our dreams. so she offered to foot the whole bill. i was so gratefull i cried. She also helps to get dd to the school every morning since the nursing home dh grandmother is in is less that 3 miles from the school and she's going that way anyway. Today she picked up dd at school and took her to the zoo.As if that weren't enough she got her lunch,and bought her and ds stuffed animals at build a bear workshop at the zoo. I was floored. She's very generous to the kids and I feel like a horses rear end for complaining.

BUT

Did the kids have to be up at 11pm???!! It's not hard to get dd to bed. Put her in her pj's, read her a book,let her have a glass of milk and put her in the bloddy BED!! It's not rocket science. DS is a little trickier since he nurses to sleep. But come on-her normal bedtime is 8:30. when we got home they were watching cars for the second time. That means she had almost 4 HOURS of watching tv. WTF?? This from the woman who is the biggest proponent of montissori i've ever seen. I don't get it. So we had to wait until the movie was over and grandma had left b4 we got her and her brother their story and she finally was tucked in by 11:45.GGGGRRRRRR. I don't know what to say about this.Obviously dh and i would like to be able to stay out a little later, maybe see a late movie. But we can't do that if she's not going to put the kids to bed. Given that she does so much for us I feel really awkward about addressing this. Any ideas.



Thanks,Jen

ellies mom
11-18-2006, 02:59 AM
I should say up front that my daughter goes to bed pretty late so that colours my opinion. If it is a rare occasional thing, I'd overlook it. In my world, grandparents get a certain amount of leeway. As long as it doesn't become a regular occurance, I wouldn't mind.

schums
11-18-2006, 10:26 AM
My mom does this with DC too. It's more fun for her (and them) to bend the rules on occasion and basically let the run the show (within reason). I don't mind too much, especially because it's not an every day or every week type of thing. Besides, DC usually take a REALLY good nap the next day, so it's kind of like having 2 dates in a row!

But if you're not expecting to have DC up when you get home, I can see how it would be enough to send you to here!!

Sarah
Mom to Alex (3/2002) and Catherine (8/2003)

Wife_and_mommy
11-18-2006, 10:45 AM
I'm all about the grandparents having fun but not having to do bedtime routines are part of the break for me. She could keep them up late but still get them to bed before you get home. I think that's what I'd shoot for when I talk with her.




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justlearning
11-18-2006, 11:46 AM
If it's frustrating for you to not have your MIL put your kids to bed, my advice would be to come back home in time to put your kids to bed yourself or else to hire a babysitter. Another option for a late-night movie would be to rent it and watch it once you get the kids in bed.

Piglet
11-18-2006, 10:28 PM
We are very lucky in that FIL babysits the kids for us when needed. We make a point of coming home at a reaonable-ish hour just in case he didn't get them to bed. That way we can sort out the sleep issues before it becomes a real mess. We also have a little chat with him before we leave to discuss anything that he needs to be aware of, just like with any other baby-sitter. We give him our cell numbers or the number where we will be, tell him when we will be back approximately, discuss any kid issues (i.e. medicine, snack times, etc.) and always make mention of bedtimes. He doesn't always stick to our schedule perfectly and we usually get a slightly wakeful night that night, but it is a small price to pay for getting free babysitting by a loving, fun, caring grandparent!

DebbieJ
11-19-2006, 08:21 PM
Yeah, my mom does the same thing. I came home the other night at 10:00 p.m. and ds was still awake. Then it took another half an hour to get him settled. Oh well.

You can't complain about free babysitting, you know?

But I feel your pain. My mom is coming again on Monday and I fear the same will happen.

~ deb
DS born at home 12/03
Breastfeeding After Reduction is possible! www.bfar.org

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