dh f'd up mother's day---add yours here

[megs4413]

i figured i would start the mother's day mess up thread........i guess he tried, but not very hard........what really bothers me is that i know he can do better...so why doesn't he?

anyone elses dh really fail on mother's day???

[buddyleebaby]

Megs, it's not even mother's day yet!

[megs4413]

i KNOW....he did it today cause we dont have time tomorrow cause we have to do brunch with my mom and grandma and dinner with his mom.....GRRRR

[lisams]

DH FORGOT my second mother's day. I remember I was crying while putting laundry in the drier and he asked me what was wrong and I let loose on him. He felt horrible, rightly so. I think it was the maddest I have ever been at him.

[MarisaSF]

Are we posting funny mess-up stories here or "I'm really pissed" mess-up stories?

Mine is actually pretty funny in a "Oops, but he did try," way. (I've already gotten a present, but he hadn't planned on giving it to me so early.)

I'm sorry yours didn't go well, Megs.

[lisams]

Our day is going to be the same - lunch with his mom, dinner with mine. With two kids it's going to be a long day of going from one place to another without any down time.

[megs4413]

you can post as you see fit! if you've got a funny story, maybe we can all get a laugh...or if you're just really pissed off (like me) then vent....

[AngelaS]

I got taken out for Chinese last night. I think that's it from here, but I'll update later. :P

[chlobo]

This is what I got:

Hallmark card from DH & DD
Window installers loudly installing window in main room of our house (guess they don't have mothers)
Husband going to Germany for 4 days leaving this afternoon

Does that suck enough for you?

[drsweetie]

I feel bad because I haven't posted in a long time, and when I do it's about this! Yesterday DH asked me what I'd like for Mother's Day, and I said that carnations and chocolate were always good. What did I get? A giant potted petunia. That I had to pay for myself because he left me at the cash register alone. Then, when I got mad, he wrote on the card, "I'm sorry I ruined Mother's Day", which just made things worse. It's hard to accept that it's the thought that counts when I feel like there wasn't any thought behind it, KWIM?

Ellen

[elliput]

Just like last year and the year before, not even a card. I can't seem to figure this out. It is not like Mother's Day hasn't been around their entire lives, YKWIM? The big issue here is that he asks me what I want for Mother's Day. HELLO! I want to be surprised with something nice that I did not have to tape to your forehead.

[npace19147]

so far nothing here. dh says he needs some alone time to get me a present - hello, it's my day, I want the alone time!!!! do it beforehand!!!!!

and no, it is not funny (which he seems to think)

[luvmypeanut]

This is the first year I've gotten Mother's Day cards - because the kids are in school and they made them there. I've never gotten anything and we don't go out because DH works on Sundays. And this year he left on Thursday for a 2 week business trip.

So I'm very grouchy today too although I should be used to it by now.

Happy Mother's Day to everyone here!

[scoop22]

i have had to spend all weekend with dh's friends... at least i have my little guy to hug. although he is being a show off and doen't want to do what mommy wants to do. i can't wait to drink my lemonaid under my new umbrella i got for mothers day.

megs so sorry your day isn't the best...
http://b2.lilypie.com/XbITm4.png

[stella]

Mine asked me on Friday what I wanted.
Then he went fishing all day on Saturday and didn't get me anything.
He says he wants me to pick out my own present.

He *did* get up and fix breakfast this morning - definitely in honor of MD since he never does it otherwise. And he had the children make cards, which is sweet.

But here I sit, a pregnant, FT WOHM to two preschoolers, whose rearing is the whole purpose of my life, and I am a terrible employee as a result of all the "taking care of my family" that I do, and I am chronically exhausted...and I would like just a little bit of stated appreciation.

That's all.

[KBecks]

DH forgot, and my day started with him grumbling that it was my turn to get the baby at 5 am.

I thought he would remember, we hat the tv on sprout with the ticker at the bottom of mother's day messages, no help. I said something around 7:30 like, i wonder if the nurseries have flowers yet, i think i'd like to get some today for mothers day and plant them with the boys.

he then remembered and APOLOGIZED for being grumpy. yahoo!

[chlobo]

Well I thought i was being proactive telling DH what would be a good mother's day present. And still nada.

[chlobo]

My DH blamed me for not getting me a mother's day present. Because all his free time away from work I expect him to play with DD or work on his honey do list.

Helloo???? When does he think I do my cute & artsy gifts - when I'm with DD. Hellloooo. Beulher?

[bisous]

So DH wanted to spend money on me this year but I absolutely forbade him. We are just so short on money that it actually makes me feel good to forgo things like Mother's Day presents that I know I really don't need. ALL I asked from him was to have a Mother's Day with a beautiful clean house and not have to be the one to do it.

Guess what. The house was a giant mess this morning. DH fell asleep all night on the couch. Consequently I did both the midnight and 3:00 a.m. blood glucose checks for DS (normally we split them up) and got DS up early, fed him breakfast, dressed him for church--all in my messy house because I thought he'd pick up.

Needless to say I was super sad this morning. Not only because DH disappointed but also because I HATE messiness on Sunday. Sunday is my day of rest and rejuvenation and I just need order.

SOOO I wasn't sure what to do. I could be super b**** with much justification but I just didn't have the heart to do it. So since DH had to do some work for his church calling this afternoon, I put a movie on for DS, and got my place sparkling clean. I immediately felt better. I had to do it myself but at least it was the way I liked it!

When DH came home he looked completely crestfallen. I could tell he was devastated. Seeing the difference in the home made him totally realize how much he screwed up without having to say one single thing. He has been terribly apologetic about it and I have hopes that he will begin understanding how much cleanliness and order mean to me.

I don't know if this sounds crazy but I think I won all around. I didn't have to lose my cool, I got what I wanted (not without significant effort, however!) and I think that DH "gets" it.

The real test will be to see what happens next year. :)

Jen

[Snugglibumkins]

Well, DH and I are going out to dinner tonight with a baby sitter that I arranged and to a resteraunt that he likes, not me, I don't do sushi. Grrr....

The house is a mess. He complained because we were a few minutes early to church this morning (we have 3 kids in 3 different Sunday School classes - I need to get there early so that I show up at my own Sunday School class on time) - because HE could have driven through the coffee place and gotten a bagel because HE was hungry and he would have done so if he knew we were going to be early. What about me? I got them all dressed and ready to get (hello? 3 kids under 5 takes time!!)

No cards, no presents. He has his own bank account and allowance so it's not like there wasn't any money. Just no thought.

And now he comes out (after I just put all the kids down for naps) and says - 'hey, let's take a nap'. Ummm...yeah, after you fall asleep I'll be right in, because there is no way in hell you are getting laid right now. Grrr...I gave up so much this year for him and the kids - and I love him and the kids, but I miss my old life and I really needed the recognition today, the 'thank you' that I deserve for being and exhausted military wife. Oh, well, at least we are going out tonight.

[set81616]

Last night DH was working on our church garden and he called me while I was cleaning up. I said my back hurt ( I had 4 broken vertebrae last year so it gets sore, especially since I am now taking DS to work with me 3 days a week and he has been very clingy lately) but I didn't want to clean in the morning so I was doing it now (our house is on the market and we tend to be slobs) He told me to stop cleaning and he would take care of it. When I got up not one thing had been done and he said he thought I had done it all. Yeah, that's why there's a dirt ring in the tub from your bath last yesterday and there is stuff everywhere. He did ok on the gift department. Hugh Grant movie from him and shirt from/for DS with a Mom tatoo on it but I was so hurt having to clean everything. Also, I asked for a journal on my birthday (last week) that DS could draw cards in. I got the journal but it's still blank. Other things happened through out the day but that was the worst of it.
Shannon

[fortato]

Megs--

Mike gave me a charm for my charm bracelet- very cute, and took my mother and I out to brunch.

Once we got home he left to go to work for the rest of the day.

I am going to remember this on Father's Day.

[KBecks]

I hear you on the whole his priorities vs. what you want thing. DH didn't listen to me and what I wanted to do (plant flowers and stay close to home), he wanted to go for a hike at a place that would be a bit of a drive.

We did what he wanted, and it turned out OK, but I'm kind of disappointed he just didn't listen / wasn't accommodating for me.

[katiesmommy]

I didn't ask for anything, I didn't want anything. DH asked me what I wanted for dinner so he could make me a special dinner. I told him spagetti. I got to take a nap. He forgot to pull out the meat for the spagetti. Then, he blamed me for not reminding him to pull out the meat for the spagetti and argued with me when I said I shouldn't have to remind him.

On a lighter note, I did get a season of Gilmore Girls on DVD eariler this week that was meant as a MD gift.

[elaineandmichaelsmommy]

Dh's grandmother passed away saturday morning/friday night. Then we had dinner at dh's fathers home which was good because his dad is good for him.
For mothers day I got to see my little sister graduate with her masters. I'm not sure why the college decided to have it's ceremony on mothers day but oh well. So since that was going on I invited mil over for breakfast b/c she was willing to watch the children while we went to the graduation. Sooo. Dh says-"I'll make breakfast,you just sleep in honey." That's just the kiss of death right there.
I did get to sleep in but got up w/ both children. Then came downstairs to the whole floor being filled with smoke b/c dh was cooking. "sauteeing" the fillings for omlets.
HELLO! How many times do i have to tell him not to saute in teflon. ARGGGH. But he was so proud of himself I let it slide. But of course who got to clean up the mess because we had to leave by 1 pm for the graduation and it still hadn't been done. Plus mil is still there because she's babysitting for us.
On the plus side-we did go out to dinner and I got a card from dh. He says he's making paving stones with the dc handprints in them for me and his mom. I believe him, he's already bought the materials.
So it wasn't all bad.

[VClute]

DH gave me a card. WHen you open it up it plays Kenny Rogers "Lady." No, that's not our song. He signed it "Rich, Dixon and Abigail." Not even a "LOVE, Rich..."

My mom took DS to the zoo so DH and I could do more prep work for our move. DH spent the whole time telling me I was packing wrong, removing draperies wrong, etc.

I then got to enjoy my NEXT Mother's Day task: grocery shopping. The BAGGER at the store was nicer to me than my own DH! He said, "Maybe your husband will surprise you and make you dinner." Nope - When I got home, DH looked at all I had bought and asked, "So - What are you going to make for dinner?" He even got to CHOOSE!

Finally, DD was fed and napping, so I hopped on the computer to check the boards, email, etc. DH walked in with his pants down. Yes. That's EXACTLY what I want to do with my MOTHER'S DAY afternoon, DH: Make sure YOU'RE satisfied! Gah! (Not even 6 weeks post-partum, I can't really participate and enjoy, if you get my drift.) I politely declined to help him out.

I *hate* that I continually get my hopes up and I am *continually* disappointed.

Amy in NC
mom to Dixon, born 2/14/05
...and Abigail Rose, born 4/7/07

[chlobo]

I just don't understand why its so hard for some men to take a little effort ONE day out of the year to make us feel special. Really burns me. If DH had approached me sans pants I would have cut it off. lol.

[Puddy73]

>
>Finally, DD was fed and napping, so I hopped on the computer
>to check the boards, email, etc. DH walked in with his pants
>down. Yes. That's EXACTLY what I want to do with my MOTHER'S
>DAY afternoon, DH: Make sure YOU'RE satisfied! Gah! (Not
>even 6 weeks post-partum, I can't really participate and
>enjoy, if you get my drift.) I politely declined to help him
>out.
>
You are a model of restraint for politely declining that offer! I would have flipped out. How are DH's so darn clueless sometimes? I hope he's nicer to you today.


Jennifer
Mommy to Annabelle 9/08/03 & Finn 10/31/05

"If we couldn't laugh, we would all go insane." - Jimmy Buffett

[mommy111]

Thank you, thank you, thank you for posting this!!!!!!
This was the first time in 3 years that H has actually been around at mother's day. So I figured he'd have done something (like a card, maybe, maybe a little present)? Nope. Plus he was in a bad mood all day and kept saying how wonderful and patient his own mom was. Its mother's day, come on, at least give me a smile!!!!

[HannaAddict]

I am probably terribly late to the party (hardly ever online these days), but WOW, you are expecting! Congratulations!!! :)

Kimberly

[brittone2]

yeah, I don't get the link to the male gene that makes it so hard to figure out. DH did okay (in his defense, I got sick right before mother's day and he took over kid duty and off of work that friday, and worked a short day the following monday, which was kind of a gift in and of itself). For mother's day, the plan was him cooking steaks...which I ate about 5 bites of due to a lovely stomach virus I have been fighting for a week now. So I spent mother's day puking and nauseous. He did help DS make me a hand made card, which was sweet, and had DS pick me out a flower (a small potted marigold LOL).

In any case, I seriously think it is some genetic link that makes it tough for them to figure out. I have 4 brothers, and for YEARS they would forget mother's day, get my mom all teary and upset, and then blame my mom for being materialistic (because she likes to at least get a card and some sort of token gift, which I understand). At the time they were in their late 20s through mid to late 30s, so old enough to know better!

So for years my dad and I had to literally call and REMIND them about mother's day. Fortunately they are all finally married and my SILs make sure my mom is taken care of, but sheesh. It amazes me that they could not figure it out year after year after year, and then blamed mom. Nice.

[kijip]

The genetic thing lets them off way too easy, lol :P. I say they get to modify their behavior like the rest of us when they screw up. Besides, there are plenty of women that suck at gift giving/remembering occasions and many men who are great in the area.

[kijip]

ROTFLMAO.