HELP! Need ideas to make DH's send-off special.

[etwahl1]

Our friend is having a jack & jill shower for us, which is also kind of a "farewell" party for DH. We are both trying to think of some stuff we can do at the party as a surprise to him or to make it a little more special just for him. Unfortunately he's not allowed to take anything personal with him on the ship (other than pictures which I will put together with him) so sending him with a bunch of stuff doesn't really work. She is going to have all the guests write down special messages regarding the baby and put them in a sealed envelope for him to open when he hears I've had the baby.

Any other ideas? She and I really want to make this as special as possible for him. He's so devastated, and I'd like to do everything possible to make his leaving a little more meaningful. Thanks so much.

Tammy,
EDD March '03

[aka_mama2be]

Tammy,

I had mentioned this before but I can think of two things that could make his send off special...neither involves this awesome farewell party, both would be for the two of you.

But doing a belly cast together
and getting some nice black and white pictures (or color) of you with belly and DH kissing belly or something like that...

I was going to do a belly cast after my shower with the gals who were in my wedding (after guest had left) but I think I am changing my mind and want to do it with DH instead...

I have just hired a gal to take black and white pics of me after seeing some she did of a pregnant gal wearing a button down white shirt they were gorgeous. I had an image of DH kissing my belly or "Listening" to it with his ear up against it...oddly enough I was on a parentsplace board and there were EXCELLENT pics of a gal that her sister took with her younger child kissing her belly, her pics gave me goose bumps.

After the pregnancy I am having the same photographer take pics of DH with his shirt off holding Tristan close to his chest etc..

Belly cast stuff can be bought on line for about $35...

I will see if I can find those pics of this gal and attach the link so you can see what I mean, but to include DH in that would be special...

I hope this works but here are her pics that I want to do something similiar, I really don't think a "pro" is needed to take these either...
http://www.shutterfly.com/osi.jsp?i=67b0de21b3329bb52516

[KathyO]

I'll leave it to you to decide whether this will help DH feel better about his forced absence...

Get a card, maybe even a blank one, and get signatures from and/or print the names of all the people who are/will be helping out and watching out for you. Friends, relatives, neighbours, even us - go through your posts and collect up all our names to add to the list. We can't give him the gift of his being able to be present, but we can show him just how many people will be watching out for/over his wife and baby while he's not there.

Best,

KathyO

[nohomama2]

How touching!!!! Kathy, I think that's a brilliant idea. Hopefully Tammy and her husband will too.

[KathyO]

Just an extra thought - will DH have web access while he's deployed? (I've heard that sometimes they do.) If so, collar a friend who has a digital camera and/or digital video capabilities. Make arrangements for some space on a web page somewhere, and for pictures/footage to be taken as soon as possible after the birth, and then regularly after. Have your web-person post them right away, so that DH can check the page regularly (if it's possible for him) and see the latest pics of you and Junior!

Posting the photos/video clips on a web page means that you won't blow out his e-mail box (if he has one) with the huge files. Plus that way we might get to see them too!

Best,

Kathy

[aka_mama2be]

Great idea!!!! He will of course feel better far away knowing this...:)

[etwahl1]

I'm actually a former web designer/developer and already have plans to build a web site. One of my friends is even going to host it for free. Nice! And luckily we already have a digital camera and digital video camera (which we just bought) and one of my friends is going to videotape the birth for me, so we can put it on the web site. I definitely think this is a great idea to keep him involved. Of course, if they take internet access down on the ship or he has to get off the boat, no access, but I'm hoping this doesn't happen.

Tammy,
EDD March '03

[KathyO]

Cool! You're off to the races, then. I'm an HTML programmer (i.e. I can write the code but have NO sense of design!) but it was my husband who put together the page for his folks out West, and my rels in Ireland. One of the cousins, whose baby is a year older, was mock-nagging her husband with, "Here's Catherine barely a wet day old and SHE has a web page... why doesn't OUR baby have a web page???!!"

Now we'll spare a prayer to the gods of connectivity! Gotta love modern technology!!

Cheers,

KathyO

[gour0]

Not exactly the same, but here's their story. In response to 9/11 Jon was going to join the National Guard, but they wouldn't take him because of childhood asthma. So, Sarah joined. They had/have one child who was just 2 at the time. Sarah had to spend two or three months away from home for basic. What she did was create a journal before she left with letters for Jon to read each day and she left a stack of wrapped presents for Jon and theo to open on different days. Jon and Theo created photo journals for Sarah and took a lot of poloroids to save for her and send, too. Don't know if any of this is feasible for you two, but I thought it was sweet.