QUality time with an Infant

[bnme]

As a newbie, I am wondering how all of the Moms out there entertain/bond with there infants throughout the day. There are so few "awake" hours at this age I feel confused as to what to do with my babe. I want to make sure I am getting the best possible quality time and feel guilty if I set him down for too long while he is awake (but even though he sleeps a lot I havent mastered getting things done while he is asleep, I may need to do something while he is awake....shower for example!)

He seems to like just being held and rocked and talked to and read to. And he also likes being in his crib if there is music or a mobile on (we have Tiny Love Symphony and FP Crib Aquarium).

What do you do with your tots while they are awake? When, if ever, do you do "household" stuff? I am worrying about that too soon? I am already counting how many more weeks till I go back to work and dreading it!! I feel like I have so much to accomplish before than and don't want to waste my precious time.

Help!!!

[Rachels]

I swear I spent six weeks rocking and nursing and not much else. Housework was out of the question. The tiny baby stage will pass SO quickly! Just snuggle and enjoy it. He'll love to hear your voice, to look at your face, to study contrasting patterns, etc, all of which can be done from your cozy spot on the couch. He'll let you know when he's ready to be put down.

-Rachel
Mom to Abigail Rose
5/18/02

[spu]

yes, like Rachel said, the newborn stage goes by so fast. I'm still at home with my babes (6 mos today!) and I already miss the little peanut age. We didn't watch too much tv, and just now got the baby einstein videos, so most of the stuff we did was with household things. Here's some of the things we did.

Play with textures. They loved it when I'd drape different fabrics across their faces or hands. Fleece, cotton, etc. Esp. warm stuff that came out of the dryer.

Blow or whistle on their faces. This got us our first giggle.

Dance with your baby. They still love this!

I tied a bunch of curly ribbons to a wooden spatula and waved it infront of their faces. Held their attention for a little while.

Kiss them all over. They still love this! (and who doesn't?)

I got a book by Gymvoree called BabyPlay that has a bunch of ideas for the different ages and talks about development, what to stimulate and how. Regarding household stuff, they liked watching me vacuum or fold laundry. You can talk to them too. If you're planning on going back to work, I'd say skip the housework and spend your time with your babe. Have someone else vacuum or do the dishes and laundry. This time is so special and goes by so quickly. Lastly, TAKE NAPS together - even on ths sofa! We did alot of this and sometimes that's all we got done for the day! :)

susan

twin girls 7.20.02
charlotte & else

[mamahill]

Agree with Rachel and Susan - just ENJOY the time. The housework will always be there (if only that wasn't the case!), but your baby will only be this small right now! I don't think I made a concerted effort to do housework until Ainsleigh was about 2 months old. And even then I only did it if I felt like it. Usually things got done as soon as DH walked in the door. I handed Ainsleigh to him and than ran around like a tornado picking things up, throwing stuff in the washing machine, and running the vacuum. We didn't start video watching until just after Christmas with the Baby Einstein videos (WONDERFUL!). For now, just use small things, but mostly you. It's bonding time!

[egoldber]

I agree with the others, just bond and forget about everything else. BUT I will say that if your baby enjoys being in a swing or a bouncy seat or looking out the window while you walk around, then let him. If he enjoys it, why not? I used to carry the bouncy seat around the house with me and while I did dishes, I had Sarah on the counter where she could see me and I could talk to her. We did this a lot. Of course, I held her and nursed her a lot too, but for me it was also important to have some time when I wasn't attached to a baby.

In general, my goal for the first 6 weeks was to be showered by the time DH got home from work. That was it. And some days I didn't make it. But who cares?

And you wouldn't be the first mom who watched those 6 weeks tick by with dread (how INHUMANE that we are generally only given 6 weeks in this country to be home with a newborn). And many moms I know watched those 6 weeks go by, and then let them continue to go by as they decided to stay home instead. It's amazing how these little people can turn our grand plans completely upside down!

Hang in there!

[bnme]

Thanks for the advice! It made me feel much better. I think I was expecting WAY too much of myself too soon. I was upset because I didn't get to shower until noon today (Last week I got lucky and and he napped from 8-10 a few days in a row and I guess I was hoping that trend would continue). Its hard switching from a rigid scheduled life (working) into the Mom of newborn role. I think I need to relax!!

He does seem to love his FP Aquarium swing, but I feel funny having him in it since he is still sooo young. But if it is entertaining him I suppose it is a good thing if not abused. ANd I am close by to monitor him and talk with him. At least maybe I can eat breakfast before 11am.

We spent the afternoon on the sofa guilt-free! I like the shower by the the time DH comes home goal...that is mine for tomorrow.

[sparkeze]

Housework? What's that?

:)

In addition to all the great suggestions already given, another activity that you and your baby may enjoy is infant massage. You can take a class, or you could just buy or rent an instructional video. Or a book...but all you need is some oil (vegetable oil works fine, or you can splurge and get Burt's Bees apricot oil, my fave!) a towel, and some relaxing music. It's not only relaxing for the baby, but when baby is relaxed, mommy is relaxed too! It especially helps on those more frazzled days when you dream about taking a shower.

[megsmom]

You know, talking with your baby is spending quality time with them, even if you are folding some clothes, loading the dishwasher, doing your hair, or whatever. You don't always have to be playing with a developmental toy or reading a book. They just like hearing your voice whether it's singing or talking, and knowing you are nearby. One of our favorite activities used to be dancing to old albums and walking around the house talking about things we saw. Now my dd is a real music lover and has a pretty large vocabulary so it was all soaking in even then! :)

Like Beth said, if you are lucky enough to have a little one that will let you take breaks from holding or nursing, count your blessings! My dd liked to be held a lot, but she got genuine pleasure from swinging in her swing and looking at her mobile and gymni, and watching me do kitchen chores as she sat in the bouncy. The household stuff is still there for me, even as I sit in my jammies here at 1 pm with laundry to do and suitcases to unpack from our trip. Enjoy this cuddly stage, it's definitely precious.

Jen
mom to Meghan 7/13/01

[Melanie]

Forget the housework, I'm sure you didn't stay home to be a Stay At Home MAID. Your baby will grow so fast, they are what counts.

I really enjoyed signing up for a Postive Parenting Class. It was nice to talk to other moms IRL to hear you aren't the only one going through something, plus they taught us activities to do with our babies.

Mommy to Jonah