Help with toddler night sleep issues

[mary b]

HELP!!! Beth, and any parents of toddlers. DD is 16 months and typically a good nite sleeper but has been a horrible sleeper the last 2 weeks especially last nite, up most of the night. I took her to her ped and he said molars but how long should this last? She didn't struggle with teething before. Also, she has a cold but I doubt that would impact her like this. I went in last night when she was screaming and she was sleeping. Beth, I think you said Sarah had nightmares. Can you do anything? Before all this, she usually slept from 8:30-7 and took between 2-3 hours per day in naps.

Thanks everyone in advance. I am on the verge of a nervous breakdown!
mary

[atlbaby]

We're in the same boat here! Arielle turns 15 months tomorrow, and has been sleeping poorly at night for about two weeks as well. We were at the ped for her 15 month check up on Monday, and he mention seeing any molars though :( but I do think it's got to be teething (I need *something* to attribute this to!) She primarily has trouble *falling* asleep at night, she'll just scream and scream, as if in pain--but I've tried everything (holding her, singing, etc) and nothing consoles her. I gave her motrin 2 nights ago and last night too, and eventually it seems to work, but then she'll wake up at 5am or so...I don't know, should I be giving her meds all night long (ie. a dose at bedtime and then in the middle of the night), when it may not even be molars at all? We are also trying to 'wean' her from having a sippy in bed (w/ water only, I know-I know it's a bad habit I got myself into!), so I'm sure that must be contributing to her crying. I must admit, I couldn't bear her crying last night and gave her some water--she didn't even want it she was so upset!

So no great advice here, just a lot of empathy!:)

Hope someone has some words of wisdom!

-Rachel
Mom to Arielle Jill, 10/30/01

[twins r fun]

I hate to tell you this, but in my expereince molars go on for MONTHS and the pain is much worse than those comparitively tiny teeth that came in before. My 15 month olds have been waking at night for I guess close to 2 months now. One of them got his first molar in mid december and we're still waiting on the 4th one to complete that set. The other guy got his first one right around Christmas and he's still working on the bottom two, which are very close! There's been some breaks in there, but it's been a lot of night waking and a lot of motrin. Luckily they only get up once (each) during the night and will go back to sleep in 10-20 minutes. I usually try rocking them, a bottle of cold water, and motrin in that order. If I'm pretty sure it's teething I go straight for the motrin and it always seems to help. Also if I they have been chewing their fingers or seem in the least bit bothered by their teeth during the day I give a preemptive dose of motrin before bed. And I think colds have a huge impact on teething pain. I don't know if you've ever experienced this, but when I am stuffed up my teeth sometimes ache from the pressure-I imagine it's the same with babies.

With my boys, I'm not sure that it is always teething-maybe they have developed a habit, maybe they have bad dreams, maybe it's a stage, but I know a lot of times the problem is pain. Not sure how helpful this is, except to tell you that you're not alone and that molars are not an easy stage in babyland (at least for us).

Nicole

[twins r fun]

Also I just thought of another theory for me and maybe you Rachel as I know you had said in an email that Arielle is phasing out her morning nap. We're kind of in the same situation here with the nap and I wonder if the night waking is some type of adjustment to the nap schedule. Maybe they are overtired or maybe they are not tired enough on the days they are getting 2 naps (which possibly they don't need anymore). I remember in the infant stage the daytime sleep had an impact on nightime. You combine messed up body rythyms with teething and maybe this is the result! What do you think?

Nicole

[atlbaby]

I think you may be right about the nap issues being (at least part) of the culprit. Arielle hasn't taken a morning nap now since Saturday (just morning 'rests' in her crib :) ) but then I have to wake her up from her afternoon one bc it's getting to be too late and I want her to go to sleep! So she's either over-tired or under-tired--just hard to know which!!

My working theory is, maybe they need 1 1/2 naps and not quite 2 anymore? I am also trying to put her to bed a little earlier, since we'd been doing 9pm (waking at 7:45am) so DH could see her sometimes, but now that she's phasing out the AM nap, she's been sleeping till 9-9:30 in the morning!! Not good for getting any outings in before lunch! So she's also probably not tired enough by 8:30 when I've been trying to put her to bed...

The molars scare me so much! I guess we are in for a long haul! But *two* with molars coming in sounds like a real handful!

-Rachel
Mom to Arielle Jill, 10/30/01

[Shirale]

We have been having sleep problems with Amira since she was about 3 months...so nothing new here! I do totally empathize/sympathize...I have been trying to wean Amira off her wake-up-in-the-middle-of-the-night-need-bottle thing...(i know, I know- even worse than a water-sippy in bed) which started when she was sick a month and a half ago and I can't get rid of...i keep rationalizing that I need a little sleep and I soon as I feel rested I will deal with sleep training her- but since that is not forthcoming (the feeling rested bit) prob until I do manage to sleep train her...I am in trouble! I tried just giving water, she drank the water and then wanted milk...she also talks so she tells me in no uncertain terms what she wants...I also have to finish weaning her off bottles completely- she will drink water or juice in a sippy or even a regular cup- but not milk. I am thinking of trying a cup with a straw...any ideas???
Teething is so hard...Amira only has 7 teeth and if these were any idicators- not only will we not lseep when she gets them, but neither will anyone else in my Apt. building!!!

[sweetbasil]

DS started cutting one of his two year molars in Jan. of '02. Seriously, the doctor, my mom (a hygienist), and DH and I could all feel it, but it didn't break through until Nov. '02. And that was just the first cusp. The second cusp is almost through now. He's handled it better than the incisors (those were toughest here), but they're taking forever! Just three more molars to go :(

When we transitioned from two naps to one, I'd put him down a little after noon, and he'd sleep for two hours. Now, I can put him down between 1:30-2 (unless he's sick, like today- then all routines go out the window!), and he'll sleep a good 3 hours. The single nap thing started when he was right around 18 mo., and it was his 2nd birthday before he was going down for a nap around 2, so that took a while.

Best wishes!

[megsmom]

Hmmmm....we went through a similar phase about a month ago with molars and lots of other issues. I was about to rip my hair out but dd always calmed down with a little tylenol or motrin so I knew we had to wait it out. Dd also reemerged with pretty bad separation anxiety around the same time so that didn't help either. As soon as the molar popped we did notice a huge improvement in sleeping. We were partly to blame for some of the disruption in her sleep schedule as we were traveling over the holidays and have had 2 sets of company. When we got back from my inlaws at Christmas, Meghan was refusing to go to sleep by herself, with rocking or singing, with anything. I finally let her cry some in her crib and then would go back and explain gently that she needed to sleep. We had to do a few nights of this and be firm about it. She is very verbal and does understand what we say and I could tell most of this crying that she was doing was her exerting her will vs. fear, sadness or whatever. It did work and got her back to her going to sleep contendedly in the crib.

A couple of nights I have played some flute and harp music for her when she had trouble settling down. She also responds to white noise from the furnace fan. A few nights she woke up and told us she was thirsty (we had forgotten to turn on her humidifier) and then went right back to sleep after a sippy of water. We also had a few night of gas and took away citrus from her diet. We really wonder if her little tummy was upset. That same week, normal sleeping returned.

I think at this age they are going through some transitions but the key is to be consistent whatever you choose to do and eventually (at least Meg) has learned to settle herself down and sleeps all night again. My husband and I have thankfully enjoyed Meg sleeping all night since 5 weeks but occasional disruptions so we feel for all of those who haven't.

One tip on the morning nap loss, (we lost ours at 12 months) I suggest putting your little one down right after an early lunch. The lunchtime sleepiness hits, the belly is full, and that generally makes for a nice long afternoon nap (2-3 hrs.) That way even when they sleep a long time, it's still waking them early up enough to go to bed at night easily. Bedtime may also slowly have to be moved up to an earlier time to compensate. This has worked well for us.

Lots of rambling, but hopefully it gets better soon. It did for us.

Jen
mom to Meghan 7/13/01

[mary b]

Thanks everyone! I had been struggling with trying to eliminate one of the naps and the molars. I was thinking I should wait until her molars come in (ped said all 4 are coming at the same time) before I switch up her schedule but it sounds like I really need to make the 1 nap transition and that should help with the nighttime problem.

Thanks again!
Mary
Mom to Noelle
9-24-01