Had a thoroughly horrible day...

[etwahl]

I went to the chiropractor, and I know everyone warned me I probably wouldn't feel better right away, but I was hoping to feel at least some relief, which I didn't. Then I went to my midwife, and as soon as I started talking to her, I just started crying and couldn't stop. I just feel like everything is starting to pile up on me, and it finally just hit me, and now the emotions are flowing. If I weren't in so much pain, this wouldn't be so bad (it hasn't up until this pain started) and I felt like I could handle it. Now that I'm so immobile, I feel like I can't do anything, and it's just killing me. The lack of sleep is also really affecting me. I'm up every hour on the hour because the pain wakes me up. Then I have to walk around before I can get back in bed to "stretch it out".

My midwife prescribed pain medication (percocet) and sleeping pills, (ambien). Now I haven't even taken tylenol since I got pregnant, so of course I'm feeling very worried about taking any pain medication at all. I'm just wondering what I should do. I know my midwife wouldn't prescribe anything that wasn't safe, and I asked her if it was safe (she said yes), but I can't help but think that there's a risk for every medication, so I'm afraid to take them. What should I do? I just want to feel better. I wish there were some sort of miracle cure that would help. She did check me, and said the baby's head was "right there", but she didn't check to see if I was dilated, because I was so incredibly uncomfortable, just that I was thin.

Tammy,
Mom-to-be Mar 8, 2003!

[jojo2324]

Oh Tammy, you poor thing! You're almost there! It sounds like you are having a really tough time of it.

I say, if your MW says it was okay to take it, take it! I am no expert on meds and pregnancy, but I don't think she would give the green light on something that wasn't safe. I can understand the hesitation, but at the end of the day you need to be in the best frame of mind and body to deliver that beautiful baby! You will be more relaxed and have a more comfortable delivery, without as much stress or tension. Have you tried taking a tub? Those helped me immensely in my final days, just let me soak and sorta tune out...

I wish there was something more I could say to cheer you up. Cry cry cry all you want. We're here for you.

[KathyO]

I'd also say, go ahead and take the meds, if your midwife has okayed them. Being awash in your stress hormones from all the pain and discomfort can't be great for baby either... (Yeah, just what you need, more guilt!) And if it helps at all, you're well beyond the period of high vulnerability to teratogens, even if these meds WERE bad for the baby's development. The parts are all installed, so to speak - the mechanism is ready to run independently!!

Pain relief, however you obtain it, also lays the groundwork for a healthier, stronger you coming into labour and delivery, and from there into the days-and-nights marathon of the first few weeks/months. You don't want to go into this already behind the eight ball from pain and stress... it won't be good for baby or you.

If it'll ease your mind, you could put a call in to your family MD and ask for a second opinion. If you like, I can call Motherrisk tomorrow for you - it's a Canadian hotline for mothers wanting to know about drugs (prescription and non) and pregnancy. They're hooked into the latest research on everything.

Hang in there!

Best,

KathyO

[gour0]

Did you call your doula to see if she would come over and give a hand?

[Rachels]

Hi! I've been thinking about you all day. I agree with everybody-- get the pills out and swallow those bad boys. You need some relief. You need to be able to rest and shore up your resources. Percocet and Ambien are both safe. Percocet will likely make you drowsy, so you may not need the Ambien. (Be sure to take the Perc with food!)

The way you're feeling is VERY normal for late pregnancy. I know the pain doesn't help a bit. You've got a lot going on. It's okay to get overwhelmed. It's okay to cry. It's okay to hate every single thing about this experience at this moment. You'll come out the other side, and you'll soon get to meet the most precious person you've ever encountered.

Take those good drugs!

-Rachel
Mom to Abigail Rose
5/18/02

[sweetbasil]

Tammy~
I'm so sorry you're going through this...I'm so in awe of how you've handled this entire situation, and can't wait to hear about the birth of your sweet little one soon. Hang in there!

Hugs,

[JMarie]

Just like everyone else is saying - take the meds! I know the pain is terrible - I would sit in my car for fifteen minutes after work and just cry at how much it hurt just to sit in a chair, or get up to go to the bathroom, or to do just about anything. I couldn't even walk to the cafeteria (right downstairs from my desk) it was so uncomfortable. Now that's one of my what ifs... Had I talked to my OB's about it and gotten meds, would Aidan have come so early? I know that *I* was stressed, and there is no way I can imagine how much stress you are under at this point. As I'd emailed before, my mother has been in almost the exact same situation, and I know she'd be more than willing to offer her wisdom. Let me know if you want her email - she has MS, so it might take her a while to reply, but she will get back to you. Hang in there - you don't have much longer, and the wait is SO worth it!

JMarie
Mom to Aidan Christopher 01/28/03

[etwahl]

The thought of taking the drugs honestly makes me a little sick. I'm sensitive to medication as it is (my mind & stomach), but when I read the cautions (from the sheet they gave me on each drug) about pregnancy, it really worries me, because it says there's a chance of the baby becoming addicted. I'm sure just taking them a couple times won't do it, but I just hate reading that nonetheless. I keep thinking if I take this medication and then later can't get the baby to stop crying, will it be because I took it?

I'm just such an emotional basket case tonight. My friend (birth companion) came over tonight and I couldn't stop crying. Then I looked in the sink to find dirty dishes and even that set me off. To top it off, I asked Evan to call me on the satellite phone ($1/minute) and we got to talk only nine minutes before we got cut off (I still don't know why).

I think it's been so difficult at this point because my expectations have had to change so radically. Aside from the obvious radical changes in plans, I thought I'd be able to continue exercise throughout the pregnancy but haven't in the last trimester, initially I thought I'd only gain 25 pounds...then revised it to 35, and now I've already gained 38. The fact that I'm in severe pain every time I move, cough, anything just seems to compound everything 200%. If you knew me, you'd know that I can endure a lot (and have) so the fact that this has immobilized me has probably hurt my emotional well-being more than I thought.

I feel like such a whiner by saying all this stuff. I'm usually the last to complain about anything that's wrong with me, but I know you all understand, which is why I feel comfortable voicing myself here. But sometimes I also feel like, outside of what's happening with DH, that I don't have room to complain. I hear other's much more serious problems, and to me, mine seem paltry in comparison.

Tammy,
Mom-to-be Mar 8, 2003!

[JMarie]

On top of everything else, the last thing you should worry about is gaining weight! I gained almost 60 pounds by the time it was all over - no exercise after 12 weeks will do that to you - and I've already lost 40 of it. I've been sweating out a lot of it - BAD edema the last month - and the IBS (irritable bowel syndrome - not fun...) has been taking care of some of it too, but whatever you gain, you can lose. The pain doesn't go away as quickly - I still get a lot of pain in the pelvic bone area, but it is no where near as bad as that last month. Sitting on the Boppy pillow helps more than I would have ever thought. Don't worry about dirty dishes - they'll get done eventually. I couldn't even belly-up to the sink for the last month! It was very sad... You can get through this, you WILL get through this, and that little bundle won't care if the dishes aren't done. Take care of yourself and that baby - you'll be fine.

JMarie
Mom to Aidan Christopher 01/28/03

[Annette_C]

Tammy,
I'm so sorry you're not feeling well.
I,too, had a similar pain in my hip during the last trimester and I especially feel for you because I know how it hurts!
I was like you, didn't even take tylenol since I had gotten pregnant. Sometimes, though, "you have to do what you have to do" to feel better. Luckily, I have my daughter to rely on when I need drug information (she's a Doctor of Pharmacy at Yale). She has access to all kind of info and the effect drugs have on pregnant women and their babies.
I asked her about your dilemma and she looked it up. She suggested trying just tylenol to start with and, if that doesn't help, then go on to percocet. She said since percocet is a narcotic, to use it with caution. Babies could become dependent with use of narcotic drugs and that affects their respiratory system. She also mentioned that tylenol and ambien are ok together but she wouldn't feel right saying to take percocet and ambien....that would be too much. And, like Rachel said, percocet makes you drowsy so you wouldn't need ambien anyway.
This is just a suggestion since you asked for advice but I'm sure your regular doctor (who knows you best) can recommend what to do.
I hope you feel better soon. You're in my thoughts and prayers.
Hugs,
Annette
SAHM to Sabrina 6/24/02

[egoldber]

Oh take those pills sweetie!!! I had Percocet after my C-section and I didn't realize how great they were until I forgot a dose and the pain crept up on me. You will be amazed at what a different person you feel like after a good night's sleep without pain.

Just a note about the Ambien, make sure you get into bed right after you take it. My MIL takes this for occasional sleeplessness. One night she took it (without telling others) and then decided she would play a game of cards! She literally collapsed in the middle of the game. We were all incredibly worried, until we realized she had taken the Ambien! So follow the directions and take it as you are going to bed.

Edited to add: As others say, you may want to try the Percocet to see if that makes you drowsy enough. It actually didn't make me drowsy at all.

HTH,

[etwahl]

It's reading what Annette posted (and what her daughter said) that makes me nervous, which has been my concern all along. I just don't know what to do.

Tammy,
Mom-to-be Mar 8, 2003!

[egoldber]

Well, if you want someone to tell you what to do, here's my two cents.

Take the Percocet! Just from what you described, plain Tylenol is not going to touch your pain. If it makes you drowsy and you sleep without the Ambien, then great, problem solved. If you still can't sleep, then take the Ambien.

It will do your little one absolutely no good to have a mom who has not been able to sleep the entire last month of pregnancy. Get your rest NOW! This is really your last chance for a LONG time to get a full night's sleep. Also, you will have a much more positive experience in your labor and delivery if you go into it well rested.

Trust your midwife. She would not prescribe these things for you if she did not think it was in the best interests of you and your baby.

Now get off the internet and go to sleep! (Hmm, it's three hours earlier where you are, but go to sleep anyway!!!) :) :) :)

[Momof3Labs]

Tammy,

Take the pills (start with the Percocet)! This stress is NOT good for the baby, and he/she needs to stay inside of you for at least a few more weeks. Even if you just take them once or twice, so you can get a good night's sleep. You need to be as well-rested as possible when baby decides to come along.

Oh - I can guarantee you that your baby will cry inconsolably at least once, whether or not you take the pills! It's part of being a baby - their little way to remind you that you are no longer in control of things. LOL!

I know, those late pregnancy hormones are killers!!

[newbelly2002]

Tammy,

You poor poor thing. As if you hadn't already gone through enough.

In terms of the medicine. Take the percoset. When I started having gallbladder attacks (passed a stone in one of them and the pain was as bad as labor) at 36 weeks my Dr. prescribed percoset for pain. Now, he is a high-risk pregnancy OBGYN and was very cautious throughout the pregnancy. He told me the pain meds would allow me to enter labor relatively rested and ready for. . .well, hard labor. Really, you're not doing the baby any favors if you are exhausted going into things. As Beth and others have said, it is also what they prescribe post-delivery, for breast-feeding moms. And now that I think of it, that was the narcotic they used while I was IN delivery (I didn't get an epidural; just used narcotics). They had me on it for 15 hours straight. I understand your hesitancy, but the best thing for your baby is to take care of YOU right now. The little one's development,with the excption of the lungs, I think, is pretty much done. You've given him everything you have to this point, now you need to take care of you.

And as for the emotional side of things. I'd take it as a very good sign. In the days just before I went into labor I was an absolute wreck. I had maintained a pretty evenkeel throughout most of the preganncy but come those 48 hours before contractions started and I was a wreck. I almost dumped a garbage can over some ill-offered advice at the dump; verbally lambasted DH's 90 year old grandmother; and broke into tears if someone glanced in a rearview mirror at me.

You're almost there, dear, you really are. Take the medicine; get some sleep. You are going to need it.

[etwahl]

AGHH!! Well I took the percocet at 9:30 pm. It's now 1:45 pm. As per usual, I've been waking up every hour on the hour and still the pain hasn't even dulled. I "think" I feel a little more "wired" than usual, which is just annoying because since I'm still in pain and waking up every hour, I have to be that much more careful when I get myself up to stretch things out.

So I don't know why, but the percocet didn't help, and I'm feeling even more exhausted now. I think tomorrow night I'll have an ambien. At least if the pain can't be dulled, maybe it will knock me unconcious enough to let me sleep through it all :)

Tammy,
Mom-to-be Mar 8, 2003!

[atlbaby]

Hi Tammy,
I just read this thread now or I would've offered you my experince the 2 times I've taken Percocet. It can have the 'wired' reaction in some people, and that's what it did for me (I called it 'feeling like I want to jump out a window' but same idea :) ) I was perscribed it when I had my wisdom teeth out and I swear I was about to hang from the ceilings I was so manic. And then I figured it was a fluke reaction (more like DH the md convinced me to try it again) when I had an inner ear infection...same hyperness insued. Argh!

So, I hope you are feeling back to normal this morning, although I wish you weren't in pain!! FWIW, a lot of doctors I know who work in the ER and have to switch their body clocks often so as to work overnight shifts take Ambien and say it works well--just allow yourself at least 8 hrs of sleep when you take it!

Hope you get some rest&relief soon! It won't be long now!

-Rachel
Mom to Arielle Jill, 10/30/01

[egoldber]

Toobad the Percocet didn't work for you! It doesn't work for everyone. But there are lots of other safe pain medications that you can take. Ask you midwife for something else.

HTH,

[Shirale]

Oh Tammy, you poor thing...did you try the Ambien?? I used it when I was pregnant (b/c of hyperemesis I would be up all day throwing up, and my body just wouldn't sleep for the first 5 months...) and it really helped to be able to sleep a little...allso, did you try the prenatal massage?? That also may help, relax you and take away some of the pain...and what about as Joanne suggested, lying ina bathtub?? The water often helps...argh, I feel so terrible for you- as if you didn't have enough stress, I just hope your pain is gone really, really soon...

[etwahl]

I'm booked in for a prenatal massage, but not until Feb 25. That's the earliest appt she had. Hopefully I make it that long. I'm honestly not a bath person. I really think that would make me more uncomfortable because of the position I'd have to be in, and wouldn't really work for my body at this time. As it was, I had a heck of a time at both the chiropractor and midwife when I was on my back. Plus, even with help, getting in and out of the tub, I think is just too dangerous for me at this point, because I am having such a hard time making certain movements with my legs and hips.

I'm definitely going to try the ambien tonight. I just didn't want to try both at the same time. I'm hoping that works for tonight.

Tammy,
Mom-to-be Mar 8, 2003!

[mama2be]

I am just now seeing your post, but knew you were having a bad time of it and glad you posted here so everyone can give you their advice about the drugs. I too say "take it"...

I have taken Ambien probably about 4 nights in this pregnancy and the last two did make me loopy...so as someone else said...tuck your body into bed, empty the bladder, get the cats comfie at the foot of the bed, and have your water set beside you...

I am really suprised the Percocet did not do much...that sucks!!!
I am hoping that the Ambien atleast puts you to sleep to get some. You need that sleep...

Could someone come and stay the night with you tonight???

My pain kicked in about 3 weeks ago, subsided alittle last week or so and is just now coming back...I did use the heating pad, have taken Tylenol and I acutally (different than others) removed the pillow from between my legs which helped me I think...

i know you said you were not a bath person...but I am wondering if a nice warm bath with candles and a dark room would relax you some. I did this several weeks ago and OH my I came out a new person...:)...
your midwife never would have prescribed those meds if she had not weighed the outcomes. You need relaxed rest...

Tammy I so wish I was near, I hate to see you going thru all of this...you are such a trooper and Lauren is so lucky to have you as a mommy!!!

Anyway we'll chat in a few minutes...:)

[nigele]

Tammy,

So sorry I can't offer any advice beyond what everyone else has said. I just wanted to let you know I am sorry for all of your pain!!

[KathyO]

I agree with the folks who have suggested that your state of mind is entirely normal for the last weeks of a pregnancy... including the feeling huge and generally ugly and horrible!! You will look at photos of you, later on, and wonder what you were so upset about.

If it's any consolation to you, I gained 55 pounds, and I am a biking, swimming, walk-two-miles-a-day gal!! I felt like a hideous mutant slob, until I met a woman in the bank lineup who looked exactly like Halle Berry, and who told me that SHE'D gained 65 (!!!)for each of hers!!! I clung to that reassurance for weeks. Whoever she is, she has no idea how good she made me feel!!

What a bummer that after what you went through to actually go ahead and TAKE the percoset, it didn't do anything for you!! Remember that the gods (goddesses) of pregnancy and labour have a way of evening things out - all this will hopefully mean that you have an easy labour, or a perfect angel baby that the rest of us will grind our teeth in envy of...

Hang in there,

KathyO

[nohomama]

Tammy,

I just read through this whole thread and don't have a whole lot to add. Trust your midwife's judgement. It sounds like you have a good relationship with this women. Trust that she's trying to do what's in your and your baby's best interest and try the Ambien (I'm sorry the pain meds didn't do the trick). Worrying about the drugs is just adding to your level of stress and counter productive.

I hear you about the bath thing. I actually love bathes but wouldn't have been able to take them towards the end of my pregnancy if Daniel hadn't been around to help me out of the tub. I was like a bug on it's back struggling to flip over. Instead, try a hot water bottle or hot towel. Moist heat is best, but a heating pad will work if need be.

Finally, I'd suggest trying to find another massage therapist who does prenatal massage that can see you sooner. You have the appointment at the end of the month if all else fails. In the meantime, it doesn't hurt to ask around for recommendations and try to get in with someone else.

I hope you get some sleep tonight. The universe owes you a break!

Take care,