Need help with cost-cutting for baby and household expenses (sorry this is SOO LONG!)

[kathsmom]

Hi, everyone! DH is now without a job. His last day was Wednesday, and he got his last paycheck today. Some of you may remember one of my posts back in Nov. 2002 about DH having a dream opportunity with a job in NC. Well, the dream turned into the worst nightmare. DH resigned Wednesday. He was trying to hang on until he could find another job, but for the sake of his well-being (not to mention mine, since I worried about this job situation so much!), he felt it would be best to resign. Also, the work situation had deteriorated so much.

Now that DH has hit the job-hunting trail, I need to look at all ways to cut costs. Believe me, we do not live "high on the hog" and there isn't too much more we can cut out. The main areas that I can reduce costs would be baby stuff, utilities, and groceries. BTW, I am a stay-at-home mom, but will go back to work if necessary. I am a speech therapist on inactive status.

For DS, we are currently using Pampers Cruisers diapers (size 3), Huggies Natural Care unscented, and Similac formula concentrate.

I am interested in the Target, Wal-mart, and BRU brand of diapers, wipes and formula (I don't know if BRU makes their own formula or not). Also, if anyone could give me feed back on the cheaper Huggies and Pampers, as well as Drypers diapers (or is it Dri-pers?), White Cloud diapers, or grocery store brand diapers and formula. I am a member of Sam's Club, so could buy some stuff there.

DS has started rice cereal and will be starting baby food soon. I already bought 5 jars of Beechnut brand. They were cheaper than the Gerber brand (which is what I used with DD). Are there cheaper brands out there? Is Beechnut a good brand in your opinion?

Also, could you give me your tips for reducing the grocery bill? What about utilities (gas, electric, water, phone)? What are some good resources I could go to (i.e., books or websites)?


While I am at it, should I use Chrismas money from my mom to invest in a crib bumper or bedding set? DS wiggles and rolls all over his crib now and he is getting his legs stuck and he can't get them out. We used to have a bumper, but returned it, because we didn't think we would need it. Then, he started getting stuck. I just hate it when he screams because he is stuck. I have had trouble with bumpers being too long and overlapping at the ends, as well as the ties not being positioned in line with the slats, and being saggy in between the ties. Any suggestions on ones that fit a crib well? I never had this problem with DD's bumper and our crib is standard size.

Thanks so much for any suggestions you may have to help us out!

Toni - mom to Katherine (5/19/96) and Andrew (9/23/02)

[parkersmama]

First let me tell you how sorry I am that this is happening! Did you have to move for him to take this job so you're in a new area?

I am in the unfortunate position of losing my job pretty soon, too, and I will be becoming a SAHM. I've been desperately searching for ways to cut costs. I don't have that many but I'll give you the recommendations that I do have and hopefully others with more experience will give you some additional tips.

About diapers...I have used Luvs (the cheaper version of Pampers) for years with both kids. They have always worked great for me and I haven't had any real problems with them. I do use Pampers or Luvs wipes. I haven't had good luck with store brand diapers but I know that some people like them. I try to watch for diapers to go on sale or buy them with a coupon. I have already made the decision to go with cloth diapers for the baby I'm expecting right now. This is a big outlay of money at first but for us it will work out good to spend the money now while I'm working and then not have the expense of diapers and wipes after I lose my job.

I don't know about formula since I have always breastfed. Sorry!

As for baby food, I have found that it is much, much cheaper to make your own. It is actually very easy to do. When my kids were eating pureed food, I'd spend a Sunday afternoon (I was working during the week) making baby food and it would be enough to last for approx. 2 weeks. The only foods that I purchased pre-made were dry baby cereal, prunes (they are hard to make...too much peeling), and apricots (they are expensive fresh so it worked out cheaper to buy Gerber). I have a book called "Mommy Made & Daddy, Too" that tells all about choosing fresh/frozen/canned foods, making the purees, storage, etc. There are several other books available too that I've seen others recommend.

Since I found out that I'd be losing my job, I've also started getting the sale ads from Publix & WinnDixie to aid in my purchasing. There are other grocery stores around but I'm only willing to deal with two on a weekly basis! I get the ads on Wednesday by dropping by the store to pick one up at the front door (they are in the Wed. newspaper but we don't get it!) and then on Wed. or Thurs. evening I go through them while we watch TV. I try to only purchase things that I know we'll eat/use (in other words don't buy just because it's a good deal!). I try to get snack foods, juice, frozen items, and meats when they are on sale. Our groceries often run them at 2 for 1 pricing. Winn Dixie even does some things buy 1 get 2 free! I got about 6lbs of boneless skinless chicken the other day for about $6 by using this system. $1 a lb is a great deal! I try to plan our weekly menus around what's on sale or if nothing appealing is on sale, I've got things already in the freezer that I bought ahead when they were on sale. It's sort of a hassle but I figure it's worth the trouble considering the savings. I will say that for us, just eating at home more is a way of cutting back. When I've been working, we spend a lot of money on eating out!

I recently purchased a book called "How to Raise a Family on Less Than Two Incomes" by Denise Topolnicki. It has lots of tips for things like reducing your phone and utility costs, putting money in savings, and how to "disaster-proof" your finances. I don't know how helpful it would be in your situation but I found it to be a good resource.

Sorry that I don't have any other tips but I wish you lots of luck at reducing costs and I hope your dh finds a terrific job quickly!

Denise
mom to:
Parker, 9/1/1997
Wesley, 3/9/2000
and #3 (a girl!) due 4/29/2003

[mamahill]

Oh Toni, I'm so sorry you're going through this. Hopefully your husband will be able to find a new job soon. I am a SAHM and we have a townhouse in the San Francisco Bay Area (I won't even tell you how much it cost!). We are by no means well off, but I have always wanted to stay home, so we have made some drastic changes.

When it comes to grocery shopping, I do enough for at least a week, if not more. That way I'm not tempted by "good deals" like the previous poster said. I take the mailers that come with the deals at a couple of the grocery stores and make a list of the good deals that interest me. From that list I decide the next two weeks' meals, and then make my grocery list. Sometimes, if chicken is at an especially good price, I'll stock up for later on. We are a leftover family. DH almost NEVER eats out at lunch. It's either leftovers or sandwiches. Also, on weekends we rarely go out. Tomorrow we're going to dinner and a movie and I can't even remember the last time we did that... August?

I buy non-perishables in bulk at Costco and it saves a ton most of the time. The cheese at our Costco is MUCH cheaper than grocery stores. Also, a lot of the produce is better and cheaper. I'll buy frozen juice every now and then, but we mostly drink water. Hardly any soda ever.

I love the BRU brand diapers. If you can get the 15% coupon, even better! We don't use formula that much, but my cousin uses the grocery-brand formula (Safeway) and it works just fine for them. I think they have all the important "stuff" in them. I use the Huggies wipes, but only if we're on the road, or Ainsleigh has dealt a doozie of a diaper. Otherwise we use washcloths that are bleached and washed in hot water. I'm not buying diapers as much from Costco because the BRU brand is cheaper. Plus, the bulk boxes at Costco are the same size as the bulk boxes at BRU, and sometimes I have coupons that can be used at BRU (does Sam's accept coupons? Costco doesn't).

I was lazy for a while about the baby food and just bought jars (with coupons and sale stuff, though, it was often cheaper), but have since been buying carrots, beans and peas in the frozen section. Then I steam the heck out of them and throw them into the blender with a little water. Freeze them, and you've got baby food for the next while! Jars are easier if you're out and about for the day, so I'd say call AND sign-up at beechnut.com, gerber.com, earthsbest.com, heinz.com for their coupons. I keep getting Gerber ones and once they go on sale AND you have a coupon, it's a great deal. Also, does your grocery store have in-store coupons that print with your receipt? The guys at my Albertson's KNOW I wait for that thing. Often if I'm buying Gerber, it will spit out a coupon for Beechnut. Next time I buy Beechnut, and a Gerber one spits out (so then I can buy Gerber on sale, with Gerber coupons, and Albertson's coupons - they're practically paying ME to take the jars!).

Some other things we did, that aren't always an option for others - or desirable - is that we cut out cable, got rid of cell phones, got rid of long distance (we have the MCI calling card from Costco for 3.5 cents/minute), and sold one of our cars. DH has a small motorcycle that he can ride to work when I need the car, but for the most part I stay home during the day. With the money from the one, we paid off the other car and now all we have is insurance on the one (and the motorcycle).

I would say don't invest in the bumper at this point. I read that once they're mobile you should take the bumper out, anyway. But if you are still interested, check out Land's End's Overstocks page. I bought ours there for a decent price.

I'll try to think of others - I know there something I'm missing. Hang in there - it sounds like your husband got out of a horrible situation, so things can only get better, right?! Best wishes...

[brubeck]

There has been lots of good advice passed on here and I won't repeat it!

For formula, you should look into buying the cans of powder. This is MUCH cheaper per bottle than using concentrate. The 2 pound cans are an especially good bargain, even more so if you have coupons to use when you buy it.

All formula is regulated by the government and it all has the same nutrients in it, except for the two new brands (Enfamil Lipil and Similac Advance) that have DHA and ARA in them. So don't be afraid to try the store brands! Some of the baby magazines (Babytalk and American Baby I think) often print coupons for free cans of store-brand formula at Walmart and Kmart.

Right now TRU is having a big sale and you can get the Especially for Baby diapers at a reduced price.

[egoldber]

Toni, I am so sorry to hear about your situation. How terrible when what seems to be a great opportunity turns out not to be. But I am personally convined that sometimes things happen for a reason. Hopefully this will all work in the end for you and your family!

But all that being said, here are some ideas. I will echo many of the things that parkersmama said. When I was a grad student, DH and I both lived off of my grad student "salary", which after rent was $400 a month! Of course, that was before we had a baby, but many of our strategies are applicable. Here are some things that really worked for us.

Stop eating out. Period. We treated ourselves to one night out a week for dinner (Friday nights) and that was it. Otherwise we brown bagged our lunch and made dinner every night.

Don't grocery shop without a menu for the week, and plan that menu around the weekly grocery store sale circular. Do not shop ANYWHERE without a list and buy ONLY what is on the list.

Do free things for entertainment instead of things that cost money. Go to the library instead of buying books. Record movies off the air and watch those instead of going to a movie or renting a movie.

You might be surprised how much just doing these few things can do. I know we personally spend a LOT of money in this area.

As far as baby stuff, seriously consider cloth diapers. For $66.40, you can go to naturalbabies.com and get her "Basic Package", which is 24 premium size diapers, and 4 covers. For $4 more add 2 Snappis and you don't have to mess with pins. This is all you NEED to diaper a baby full time and do laundry every 2-3 days. To make your life easier, you could get an order of disposable liners ($5) that would make poops easier to deal with. This is WAY more economical than using any type of disposable diapers. And 4 dozen cheap baby wascloths will be all the wipes you need.

As far as formula goes, consider switching to store brand. It is ABSOLUTELY as nutritionally complete as any of the other brands. Now, it may not agree with your baby, but I would DEFINITELY try it. FYI, ALL the store brands are made by one company so buy it wherever it is cheapest, usually Target or Walmart.

I also made all my own baby food except for cereal. (I figured she could live without prunes :) ). Also do things like buy adult applesauce (it's the same stuff at a third the price).

For baby clothes, shop only at consignment stores. My local store always has Hanna Andersson, Carters and BabyGap. Look there for baby equipment too.

For your utilities, call the various companies and ask what you can do. Many of them have plans that may save you money. For instance, last fall DH and I signed up for a "fixed gas price" option on our heating bill and that has turned out REALLY well for us. Many phone companies offer fixed rate plans. Now that local phone service has been deregulated, many companies are offering local and long distance service at VERY competitive rates.

And lastly, there is a "Frugal Living" board on ParentsPlace that is supposed to be very good with a lot of good resources.

Best of luck to you!

[flagger]

First let me echo what alot of people here have said. You also need to remember that this too shall pass. When I look at the times when Ms. Flagger and I barely had two nickels to rub together and had to move in with my mom and borrow money from her sister because we got upside down, I realised we can weather any storm that comes along.

Your babies just need a loving mom and DH and a warm bed, the other things will fall into place. Trust me.

They dropped a bomb and Ms. Flagger and suggested her for a position in Kirkland, WA yesterday. Well with April 1st being her last travel day, that would mean we would have to find a place, an OB, a hospital, a pediatrician within 6 weeks from today. Move across the country from NC and then have her take off after the baby is born.

She is turning it down even though it would be good for her career. Even with the way this project is coming about and slowing down, we are happy here and don't need the stress of moving right now.

I echo what others have said about making a menu and shopping from a list. Amazing how much we have saved not eating out 3 and 4 times a week. We are also leftover folks. Though things like bread and milk and OJ, we tend to buy every week.

Good luck.

[August Mom]

I'm sorry that your DH wound up with such a miserable job experience. Hopefully he finds a new job soon.

My local Sams Club has Pampers Cruisers, sizes 3, 4 and 5 and Huggies Natural Care Wipes. You may want to check there for good deals. You could also try making your own wipes to save money. As far as diapers go, I have used the Pampers Baby Dry. I think they are fine. I prefer the Swaddlers (we aren't into Cruisers yet) but the Baby Dry seem just as absorbent, just not as soft. Also, they don't have the stretchy tabs like the Cruisers. Actually, rather than the Baby Dry, I would buy Luvs to save money. Luvs are made by the same company as Pampers. The fit is identical and the appearance is almost identical. Luvs have Barney on the waistband while Baby Dry have Little People and the covering on Luvs is slightly different. At my local Meijer store, Luvs run about $2.00 cheaper per pack than Baby Dry. I have tried the Loving Touch (Target brand) diapers and White Cloud diapers without much success (leaks) but I know others have been very happy with them.

Also, I would use coupons, both for baby products and generally. And, look at what stores are doubling or tripling coupons or having super double coupons. One of my local stores doubles coupons every day up to $1.00. Most of my diaper coupons are $1.00, so I save $2.00 per pack. Pretty good.

Also, I'm sure that you've thought of consignment shopping. Going to Once Upon a Child or some other similar children's consignment shop is always a good way to save money on clothes and some other baby equipment. Sometimes the clothes are even new, with tags still attached.

Those are the things that spring to mind at this point. Good luck.

[mary b]

Toni, just wanted to echo what everyone else has had about you being in our thoughts and I am very sorry about your situation.

I agree with the above tips and only have 1 other main one to offer: garage sales and Mom's sales for clothes/toys and other equipment. I am in the Midwest and it is almost time for garage sales and Mother of Twins sales. I can't tell you how many great deals I have gotten from these sales. Again, it is best to have a list of needs and don't be tempted to buy something because it's only $1. (I still am working on this!).

Not eating out is also a key piece of advice. Before DD, we spent a fortune on eating out.

Definitely check out books at your library about this topic. I have been reading several lately, and although some of the ideas are extreme, The Tightwad Gazette is a good place to start.

Take care ,

Mary

[twins r fun]

Toni,

Sorry to hear about the job-that must be scary for you guys. Sounds like you are handeling it well, though. I don't have much to add, but did get some good ideas I might try myself! I just wanted to say that we used Beechnut and found it to be great. The reason we used it was because our wholesale club (BJs) sold a fruit pack and a vegetable pack with 4 varieties in each and it worked out to be pretty cheap that way. Some are stage 1 and some are stage 2, but we just used them the whole time they were on baby food and bought a few other varieties from the grocery store. You might want to check Sam's and see if they have these. Good luck with everything!

Nicole

[Momof3Labs]

Toni,

What a bummer - but it sounds like you and DH are taking this one in stride.

Another thing I've heard recently from a few SAHMs is that they've had a lot of success bringing in some extra income by selling on eBay. Think baby stuff that you won't use anymore, extra coupons (diaper coupons are popular), clothes (child and adult), and just about anything else that you already own, don't need, and can ship with reasonable ease.

You might also try garage sales for kid stuff - more work than consignment stores, but if your DH can stay with the kids and you can power-shop for a couple of hours, it may be well worth it. Just watch that you only buy things that you need/can use (or can sell on eBay for a nice profit)!

Regarding formula, I have a coupon for a free can of Wal-Mart formula. E-mail me if you want it ([email protected]) and I'll send it to you.

Hang in there - these things have a way of happening for a good reason and working out in the end!

[egoldber]

Flagger, I have to laugh, because this is what we did! And I REALLY don't recommend it! When I was about 20 weeks pregnant, DH was laid off. Fortunately, he knew it was coming and had been job searching, so he had a job a week or two later. But across the country! We moved from the San Francisco Bay Area to the Washington DC area when I was 33 weeks along.

We found a house, an OB, a ped, etc. all between 20 and 36 weeks (because I delivered early). I can look back on it now and laugh, but OMG it was truly awful at the time!!!!

[KathyO]

Hi Toni - my sympathies as well. My husband lost his job last year, and it was scary, because we were already living very conservatively to keep me at home nursing the baby. He found another job, and we're okay again, but soon he'll be undergoing his apprenticeship for the trade he's going into, and we'll be very skint again for a while! (Plus I have a Mom who was raised by her widowed mother during the Depression, so cheapness runs in my veins...!)

Most of my high points have been covered here already, but I'd like to second Beth's suggestion to at least consider cloth diapers. They cost less to start with, and then you'll be able to sell them again when you're done. And try your local consignment store(s) for bumpers and bedding. Most of them have a return policy that will let you get your money back if you know right away that the fit will not be right.

If you have a Savers or Value Village nearby, check it out regularly too. I have nailed lots of unbelievable deals at mine (the latest - an L.L. Bean Gore-tex jacket for me, in pristine condition, for approximately $3.50 US. In my favourite colour, too.) One day I'll walk out swearing that the place is full of nothing but crap, the next time I'll walk out with an armload of immaculate, quality stuff by Baby Gap, Land's End, Gymboree etc. for just a few bucks.

If you have vegetarian recipes you like, make them more often - meat costs! If you have a crock pot, check out recipes for it - you can do wonders with the really cheap cuts of meat, and they're generally more flavourful anyway. Be shameless about checking out the bargain bin and the marked-down produce - some stores will only put out stuff that's fit for compost, but others will mark it down just because they have a surplus of that item. We have been feasting on red and yellow peppers and portobello mushrooms this week on that basis.

Please give your husband my best wishes on the job hunt - I'm sure he'll be scooped up again soon. All the best, and hang in there,

KathyO

[ddmarsh]

My biggest household money saving tip is to use www.onesuite.com as a long-distance service - it is honestly amazing. It costs 2.9 cents per minute if you go thru their 800 number and it drops to 2.5 cents if you have a local access number (they list them on the site). You buy in dollar amounts (10, 20, 30, 50) and use until gone. There is absolutely no fee per call, per month - nothing. This has been great for us b/c our families both all live long-distance. I was skeptical when I first heard about it but it has honestly turned out to be great.

I also have started buying Huggies wipes in the big boxes from BRU - they are about 10.00 for a box of 400, which is about like getting a half of one refill pack for free (at least that's what my newly postpartum brain came up with quickly in the wipes aisle!).

Trust that things will work out for the best :).

Good luck -
Debbie

[nigele]

Toni,

I am so sorry to hear about your husband's job. I cannot give you any suggestions at the moment - I'm not feeling well and my head is splitting, but I just wanted to let you know how very sorry I am to hear about your situation. Best of luck - I will e-mail as soon as I can. (Thomas is having surgery Monday so it may be a while but please know that I am thinking of you.)

[Annette_C]

Toni,
I just wanted to let you know how sorry I am about your DH losing his job. I hope he finds something really soon.
You've received a lot of good tips from the people here on the board so, there's not much I can add. I was in your situation when my older children were born and I found that by making things myself, it would save a lot of money. I learned how to make bread, pizza, pasta, my own sauce, etc. A lot of times I would make "Frittata" (which is an italian omelette) and have a meal for about a dollar or two (you can find eggs on sale for .99 and I only used 1/2 dozen; add some chopped onions, and/or potatoes, peppers or zucchini, salt, pepper, little grated cheese and you're done).
Please hang in there....I'm sure things will turn around soon.

Annette
SAHM to Sabrina 6/24/02

[cara1]

Again, so sorry you're in this predicament. A few other suggetions...Try cutting the cable bill. We have the basic package. I mean, the really basic package. Just the regular channels for $11 and change. Also, we don't use wipes at all. Just Bounty paper towels and water. (Wipes when we're out only). I've never bought baby food without a coupon; beech-nut or Gerber work fine.
Best of luck to you.

[mama2be]

Toni,

I sent you a personal email to the account you'd emailed me from...I just referred to things we did once I lost my job back in April. Most of all to cut expenses right away and not just when you really ahve to. I am convinced that is what helped us so much!!!

Anyway it is a long email, let me know if I can help you with anything. Darn it I was looking so forward to you all being our neighbors...I'm sorry it did not work out.

[mama2be]

Debbie,

I second onesuite...we just got it and I love it!!!! I have had about two times that I go to make a call and when I dial the 1-800 number it does not prompt me to continue. I wondered if the lines were busy. But hey that's worth it to me...I wish we did this sooner!!!

I actually had emailed Toni about this directly too :)... It might have been you who suggested this several months back and we just sat on the info...OH I wish we started it then!!!

[Andrea S]

Toni:

I am sorry to hear about your husband's job. If you are interested in using grocery coupons I belong to a yahoo group that you post your wish list or what coupons you have available and everyone trades. I also have a list of tips for couponing from the moderator of the group she is an expert she feeds her family of I think 5 or 6 on $200 a week she used to spend $600. I am no where near that dedicated and am happy to save $10 a week. If you are interested in her tips let me know.

Andrea
mom to Andrew 8/14/02
[email protected]

[kathsmom]

You all are the best group of ladies and gentlemen! Thank you so much for your support. I feel like this situation of us having to cut back so much is our fault. If DH had not resigned, then we would be OK. I would almost feel better about it if he been laid off, at least we might have gotten unemployment! However, the stresses of the job have taken a toll on our physical and emotional health. When DH told me he had resigned, I felt like a huge burden had been lifted off of us.

DH has already got his resume out to recruiters and has several promising leads from them, as well as personal contacts.

DH cancelled the 2 extra phone lines he used for business, as well as the internet. He is cancelling his cell phone. All this was paid for by his company.

We pay our credit card off each month, and we have no debt except for our mortgage and the car payment. We only have one car. DH used to have a company car with his old company, and he was supposed to have one with the new job, but they never gave him one. We will have to get rid of cable and quit eating out (my 2 luxuries that I love. Boy, I am going to miss Trading Spaces and HGTV!). We will keep my cell phone for now and of course, we will keep the internet to help DH with his job search.

I have 2 friends who gave me a ton of boys clothes for DS (sizes 3 months-5T), so we are OK right now for him. I need new clothes, because I still can't fit in regular clothes, but maternity clothes are too big (stress makes me eat, so I haven't lost weight!)

All these tips that you have given have been wonderful. I will be going to the library to check out some of the books that you have recommended. Thank you for all your suggestions about groceries, utilities, diapers and formula. I am calling my ped. on Monday to get the OK to switch formula.

ALSO, WHAT MAKEUP IS GOOD QUALITY, BUT REASONABLY PRICED? I had already switched from my beloved Lancome Definicils mascara to Maybelline Full 'n' Soft. I have some MAC eyeshadows I love, but will need to get cheaper ones when they run out. I wear Clinique foundation right now and love Bobbi Brown foundation, but will have to switch to something else. Any suggestions?

Thanks again for all your support, tips, and suggestions! Please post more if you can think of any!!

Toni - mom to Katherine (5/19/96) and Andrew (9/23/02)

[jojo2324]

Wow Toni, I am so sorry you are having to go through this!! When I was young we were really poor (read, incorporating Ramen noodles into EVERY SINGLE MEAL); unfortunately that did not teach me frugality. :( Quite the opposite, actually, and I am paying for it now, literally!
But I am working my way to greener financial pastures, and reading everyone's suggestions has inspired me.

Here are a few things that jumped into my mind.

*Definitely go with store brand formula. All formula is government regulated, so all brands have to meet the same criteria. And powder is much, much cheaper than concentrate. And I would follow the suggestions about making your own food. We are currently using jarred food to detect for allergies before I make any big batches, but once we weed through the veggies, I think we'll be all homemade.

*On that note, go with store brand food! If you read the labels of the store brand products, it usually says something like, "Produced by Heinz for Waldbaums" or whatever. Clip coupons, and do any of your local grocery stores have a bonus or value card of some sort? Or a double or triple coupon day? We have a bonus card, and it really does save money. Also, I get a little high off of it. There is this small pause between when they read me the total before swiping the card and the total after that is so exhilerating. I think my record is about $30 for one time, but my mother does much better than that.

*Consider CDing. I am thinking about jumping on the bandwagon myself.
However, I know you said you go to Sam's Club. We go to BJs and get the Pampers Cruisers. The BJs brand are the exact same cut. Not as cushy, and not as stretchy, but they are the same cut. And much less expensive. I think it was just shy of $17 for the 104 count box. The same size box of Pampers was $30.

*Maybe this is obvious: TURN OFF THE LIGHTS!! We have a roomie who is always leaving the lights on, and it infuriates DH because our energy bill is high enough as it is. Also, lower the thermostat. We keep the house at about 66 degrees, and at night even lower, 60-64 degrees. Throw on some extra layers...Yikes! Could I sound any more like my father right now?! Put on a sweater! A little scary! :D

*Make a notation of every penny you spend. You'll realize pretty quickly what is necessary and what is not.

*I know the first instinct is to get rid of cell phones, but have you considered getting rid of your land line? I don't know how feasible it is (what is your internet connection?), but since so many companies offer free long-distance, no roaming fees, some 1000 minutes/month, free nights and weekends, etc, at times it could work out to be a better deal to go cell.

*No eating out!! It stinks, I know. DH and I are the worst offenders here. We are going out on Monday to celebrate Valentine's Day (we both had to work). But that is it for a long, long time. And we're bringing the baby with us, so not necessarily romantic either. Ho hum, whattya gonna do? :D

drawing a blank...Oh!

*Do you have a CVS pharmacy near you? The policy at CVS is that if you don't like ANY sort of health or beauty product, you can return it, OPENED, for a full refund, as long as you have your receipt. I think Rite-Aid does something similar. (Sorry, I am in NY, so I know that the likelihood of you having these stores is pretty slim.) So go play all you want with make-up, facial cleansers, lotions, etc. And if you find you don't like them, return them! I do this all the time. The cashiers grumble a little bit, but it's their policy and they can't stop me. Just an FYI: I *LOVE* Maybelline Great Lash, or whatever their classic one is, the pink and green tube. It's great and usually under four bucks a pop. Also, every time I read in a magazine about some make-up artist's tool box, they always say they use that. :*

*Definitely reduce cable. We just got the digital service a few months ago, and we are really, really regretting it now. I want to cancel it all and just have channels 2-13. It is pointless to have any more than that. Besides, I feel like my brain is mush enough as it is; I don't need to help it along by spacing out in front of the tube. However, there are a few channels I could not go without, and with my cable company you could kind of purchase them à la carte. For instance, we adore Comedy Central. (Jon Stewart is soooooo dreamy.) If we were to reduce our cable package, we could get CC for an extra $2/month. The same could probably be done for TLC and HGTV and the Food Network. Obviously the premium channels like HBO and Showtime would cost more, but something to look in to.

*The library! They have magazines there, and my public library also has videos and DVDs that you can take out. You have to return them in two days, but they are free! They might have a limited selection, but since the last movie I saw was SpiderMan, and the one before that Monster's Inc, everything is pretty much new to me. :D

Okay, sorry this is so verbose! I agree with Beth; things, though at times they may seem really crappy, do happen for a reason. And children are resilient little things. All they need is love and they'll be just fine. And it is for the best that your DH got himself out of a bad situation before it escalated into something much worse. You can work through it!

PS...I know you said DS was okay for clothes, but if you want I can lend you some. My DS has grown so quickly and we have had to get so much to keep up. Also, I know your little girl is older, but I do have some dresses for spring/summer in hiding. I used to work in a kids' clothing store and couldn't resist. ;) Most are size 2T-6/8...What size is your daughter now? A lot of them are smocked, not necessarily everyday wear, but they are only sitting in my basement until I have a little girl of my own. And I have some coupons kicking around, Pampers, Desitin, jarred food, etc. Give a holler if you want anything.

[Sandy]

Hi Flagger,
If Ms. Flagger and you change your mind and decide to make the move let me know if you need information for this area. Ica n recommend hospitals, doctors etc...

Sandy
mom to Alexander Thor 3/16/02

[mary b]

Hi Toni, I thought of a few more grocery tips. I agree with Neve. Start cutting now not when you HAVE to and you will probably develop some good habits to keep even when you aren't in this situation (which hopefully will be soon!).

Take a look inside your cabinets and fridge to see wht items are you buying alot you really don't use? Do you have a supply of staples that you could make a lot of meals from just sitting in your cabinet. Check out web recipe sites for low cost meals (therecipelink.com) is my favorite.
Do you have a deep discount grocery store like Aldi's or Lo Bills?? They are great for staples. I would leave the kids with DH and go to the store and really look at every item and is the store brand cheaper than the brand name if you have a double coupon?? You probably know this, but on each label by the product, tell you how much an item is per ounce. Take a calculator and figure out the difference with the coupon per ounce. Is the largest size the cheapest? (Not always).

Also, if you are buying any "convenience" items now for use inside the home (juice boxes, individual containers of applesause, jello, etc), I would start buying the non-individual quanities of those items. Check with your ped first if you are unsure, but we starting at this time, using "adult" applesause for DD and apple juice and other selected items which of course is much cheaper than baby food. (Again, check with ped, depends on teeth etc).

All of this is very time consuming, but can really pay off.
Hang in there!!!
mary

[divabell]

Wow, everyone has such great tips. I will have to remember this thread when the time comes for me since my freelance career isn't too lucrative!

I have never been one to buy department store makeup--I have always used Maybelline, Cover Girl, and sometimes L'oreal/Revlon/Almay if I had a coupon. I like the Cover Girl Fresh Look foundation. It's not the cheapest of their formulas but it seems like really good quality to me. Also, if you are near an outlet mall, they probably have some sort of cosmetics outlet and you might be able to find the stuff you like, or comparable stuff, for better deals. But I can't really say how good the prices are for makeup. I bought some Clinique sunscreen there and it was probably half of the department store price.

If you have a Target nearby, you should definitely sign up for a Target Visa. For every $1 you spend at Target you get a point. For every $2 you spend elsewhere you get a point. When you get 1000 points you get a 10% off coupon. I've used this to stock up on household stuff and saved considerably. (And when you use your 10%, if you have regular coupons, they take the 10% off the pre-coupon price!) We also have Discover cards and use them for gas, groceries, heating oil, and whatever else we can, and the cash back does add up after a while.

Good luck and hope DH finds a new job soon!

--Lori R.
TTC since October '02

[August Mom]

I had a couple other grocery saving thoughts. Eliminate junk food and convenience foods. These foods are expensive! All types of chips and cookies are especially bad. It's amazing how much better my grocery bill looks when I don't buy snack foods and pop. If you must have some junk food :), try the store brands. Consider buying store brand items generally. I have found that most store brands are fairly comparable in quality to the name brand and many stores guarantee you will like their brand as well as the name brand or they'll give you the name brand free. I generally buy store brand cheese, milk, chicken, canned goods, especially beans, bread and pasta. Also, convenience foods like frozen dinners or precooked chicken strips, etc. are overpriced. Finally, consider making juices from frozen concentrate as that method is cheaper than buying the premixed juice in the refrigerated section.

[KathyO]

Don't feel bad about DH resigning - it isn't his fault and it isn't yours that the workplace was toxic. It's good, rather, that he walked out with his mental health intact, and didn't wait until the place had wrecked his health and given him high blood pressure and an ulcer to try and tackle the job market.

It sounds like he's well on his way to the next one!

Best,

KathyO

[gravymommy3]

This is a trick I use: I squeeze my 3 year old into size 3 Pampers ( he is 37 lbs but tall and skinny). You get more in the box than you do with size 4. I just bought a box at Sam's yesterday. I had been buying Luvs by the box at Walmart. But, they recently decreased the number in the box, so the pampers cruisers are almost the same price and I swear I have less leaks with them. He is active and the stretchy tabs allow me to fit him in the smaller diapers (the same size his little sister wears so I also don't have to buy two boxes at a time). I have also learned to change even the messiest diaper with just two or three wipes. I will go without food before I give up my Huggies wipes. Speaking of Huggies, the Huggies diapers at Sam's were a good bit cheaper than the Pampers (Huggies diapers don't work well for me but they might for you - just a thought).

I have started shopping for groceries at Walmart (I hate doing it - no paper bags, no one to help you to the car - a bid deal with three kids 4 and under) but, they are much cheaper than Publix or Kroger (even with double coupons at Kroger). And, one Walmart in my area is 30 cents cheaper on an item than another, so it pays to note prices.

Sell unused clothes on Ebay or at a consignment store and considering buying on Ebay or at the consignment store also.

A lady in my neighborhood sits children on a drop in basis for extra money. That may be worth a try.

You may not want to do this, but if DH is out of work with no income, you might qualify for WIC or something similar. Don't be ashamed to accept a little help if you qualify.

Good luck to you.

Amy

[CherylT]

Sorry to hear about your situation - I hope things turn around for your family soon!! When I decided to stay home with the kids, we too had to make huge changes. I sat down and went through each monthly bill and checked to see if I could lower it or not (switched long distance, changed local service, use Juno for internet, switch newspaper to weekend only, stopped subscribing to so many magazines, etc.). I also use storebrands for a lot of things. I generally will buy it once to try it and if it works for us, we stick with it - this itself can save a lot of money (i.e. storebrand Listerine is about 75% cheaper than the brand name). I also use coupons and frequent the stores with double coupons. We've also become a little more flexible with regard to brands for personal items - deodorant, hairspray, gel, etc. - I generally buy only when on sale and I have a coupon. I do make a list for shopping, but if a staple for our family is on sale when I visit the store I do buy it and stock up on certain things - so I can't say I follow the list exactly every time, but I do feel I save my family money in the long run. You mentioned you have a Sam's Club membership - they have the cheapest wipes I've found. They are called Natural Choices - 480 wipes for about $8. I like them and have been using them for a couple years - for one thing they don't have all that excess liquid that you have to squeeze out, just the right amount :). Everyone else has given excellent suggestions so I'm sure you're off to a great start - finding ways to save money is a bit addicting after a while :). Good luck to you!!

Cheryl
SAHM to Lilli 9/20/00 & Alec 10/21/02

[kathsmom]

Wow! I am still so grateful for all your support. Thanks to everyone for all your suggestions and tips. I told DH about all the responses to this post and he was so grateful that we have such a great support group.

Denise (parkersmama), we were fortunate that we had not moved yet. We were trying to sell the house through word of mouth, and work on painting, cleaning, etc. to put on the market with an agent. A couple of people looked at it, but we had no offers. Because of DH's work schedule, we had not begun any painting, etc. We are just grateful that we had not signed a contract to put the house on the market. Our next door neighbors are glad we're not moving - they are like Katherine's grandparents. She loves them to death.

Joanne, we do have CVS here. Thanks for the reminder about the makeup return policy - I totally forgot about it! Plus, I have one of those CVS shoppers cards. I will be calling cable to see if we can get a la carte channels. We have to have cable just to get the basic channels tuned in clearly. I will also have to start checking my magazines out of the library like you suggested!

I will be looking at the sales papers and coupons in today's paper, while DH checks out the classifieds! The problem is that I have so many grocery stores near me that it's difficult to decide who has the greater number of good deals. I have been shopping Walmart for groceries and as someone else said, I hate it too, but the prices are great. I buy all meats and produce at Publix though. I will be trying out Kroger and Ingles though, since they offer double coupons.

Yesterday, we went through some things we had bought at Christmas or after that we had not used yet. We asked ourselves if we needed it or not. If we did need it, could it be purchased cheaper. Needless to say, Pottery Barn Kids, Williams Sonoma, Belk, Nordstrom, and BRU were not too thrilled to see DH walk in with all the returns! It really wasn't that bad - just a few items per store, and none were huge big ticket purchases, but it all adds up.

I forgot about a book I had checked out from the library a while ago called Miserly Moms by Jonni McCoy. There is also a website - www.miserlymoms.com. I will be checking that website, as well as the ones you have posted. I will also be visiting the library and used book stores to see about the books recommended.

For those who have offered coupons, etc. I will be e-mailing you later. Right now I am feeding DS and typing one-handed. DD is wanting me too - she's been sick with a virus since Friday, but is feeling better today. She is still running a fever though. Please pray that Andrew doesn't get it!

Thanks again!

Toni - mom to Katherine (5/19/96) amd Andrew (9/23/02)