Harder on mommy??? TRISTAN'S IN HIS CRIB TONIGHT- (AN ATTEMPT I SHOULD SAY)

[mama2be]

UGHHH I just put Tristan in his crib to his mobile after finishing a bottle.
Co sleeping was not something I planned, outisde of the first few weeks after birth, but it worked, he'd drink and then nuzzle and fall asleep. If he woke he was hungry and instantly went back to bed. About 2-3 weeks ago he started kicking more during the night and waking more, not the non moving little angel that he was ;)

Well last week at our 6 month appt the DR said "you're still co sleeping...I don't have a problem with that BUT where do you see yourself in 6 months with that". right then I knew I was ready to try it. So for two nights I put him up and he didn't full fledge cry but sure did whimper, of course I ran up and got him clutching him to me as tight as I could and tucked him beside us.

He's really kicking during the night so I jsut put him in his crib and the mobile is running and I have not heard a peep since that was started...Wish us luck...

This is harder on mommy than Tristan I think, or atleast some of the time. He does lately seem to know a whine makes me react...

[SeekerMage]

They always know what strings to pull dont they?
Good luck with the sleeping in his crib...sounds like so far he is doing good....hehe you can always go and sneak a peek when he is sleeping! Thats my favorite past time with Angela and Im sure will be with Lil'bit :)

[mamahill]

Oh sweetie! I think EVERYTHING is harder on us then on them:). Good luck with the "weaning." Tristan is such a good boy, he'll do wonderfully. And in the meantime, all the more room for NeveO and her computer-buying DH (come on - pull out that lingerie and celebrate!)! ;)

[KimberleyDawn]

Neve,
Poor Mommy!!! Good luck with Tristan and the crib! I have often had the urge in the middle of the night to bring William into our bed and he wasn't even fussing (lol) but sleeping soundly in his crib (dh usually stops me first though)!
Kim

[liya]

Lets not talk about this plzzzzzz.....i need to put Arian in his crib already and look at my pathetic excuse not to put him in his room..Sigh i made a little bed for him right beside me in his play yard....I suck so bad....honestly i just can not get him out of my room...I mean i thought i could but i cant...Its just so hard, even now its hard since hes not in my bed with me...URRRGGGHHH i gotta get a grip and get him into his crib pronto...sigh....

Good Luck Neve, you are far more braver than I....:)

[himom]

Yay for you, Neve! You're being very brave.

I still have Josh's crib a foot away from our bed. He falls asleep there and I bring him to bed with us at around 5 am or whenever DH gets up for work. Everytime I think it's time to move him to his own room I justify him staying with some "rational" excuse. :) Hopefully he'll be in his own room by kindergarten. I bet when I move Josh I think I'll miss him more than he will miss me.

I'm sure it's harder on you than Tristan but it sounds like you are doing great! I'll use you guys as inspiration when I finally work up the courage to move Josh.

Jodi
Mommy to Joshua, born February 2003

[AngelaS]

Just focus on the many wonderful nights of uninterrupted sleep that await you! My theory has always been, if mama's well rested, life is better for EVERYONE! :D

How'd he do??

[etwahl]

Oh wow. That's a tough one. Lauren wakes every 1.5 - 2 hours to nurse, so I know what it's like not to have a sound sleeper. Since we're nursing and she is always eating, I couldn't move her out of our bed, BUT when that stops one day, I would be so sad to put her in the crib also. I LOVE having her next to me.

Do you think having the crib in your room for a while until everyone gets used it would help? Especially since it's so far away for you to get to his room.? Just a thought. I know that would be a big pain, but then you could take your time getting him adjusted to the crib, maybe part of the night in your bed?

I had been meaning to ask if he was rolling so much in bed, because you said he rolled all over the place, so I was curious how you were containing him!

Also, and I might be wrong here, but Evan took our mobile down because he had read it was only up to 5 months, because they now get frustrated by toys they can't touch. That could be something? I'm not sure though. I might be wrong about that one. Does he go to bed with his favorite lovey?

A friend of mine said she got her daughter used to going to sleep on her own by picking her up for a minute when she cried, then putting her down again, and kept that up until she went to sleep. She said a week of that, and she didn't have to keep picking her up. Might work?

Good luck sweetie. hugs :)

Tammy,
Mom to Lauren Genevieve
03/12/2003
www.evantammy.com

[toomanystrollers]

Soooooo, how did last night go? Did mommy get any sleep? :)

[sbirmantaz]

I just went thru getting my 11 month old to sleep in her crib instead of the pack n play next to our bed! It has only been 4 days, but it has gone really well once we (DH and I!) got over the initial crying. We were really surprised that she only cried for 30 sec's after we left the nursery (except the first night) She slept in our bed until she was about 8-9 months and then got too squirmy to be safe we felt. It was so hard to put her in her crib, but now I think we all sleep better. She still wakes up a few times during the night, but as the days haev gone on she is really learnign how to soothe herself back to sleep! I never thought it would happen so easily! I agree though, the pain I think is worse for us then them! By the way, are you still usingthe Amby hammock? I am still trying to decide if it is worth it for #2....

[mama2be]

9:00 AM here and he's still asleep...but before you get too impressed I was up with him till about 1:30.

Right after writing my post he was whining and thrashing so I ran in there scooped him up and took him down stairs in our bed. For soem reason he thrashed, looked around and jsut did not want to go to bed last night. I tried to snuggle him and he treated it like "tummy time", head up, back arched looking around. Steve has a huge project this week at work so I took him back upstairs to his bed...

My Ped reminded me his baby was born almost 3 months early has only been out of the hospital for 2 months and said that he does not even own a monitor. I'm not bashing monitors BUT I did unplug ours last night. I could still hear him and he did whimper to sleep (but he was wired anyway and would have whimpered in bed I think)...

I checked on him about 5 times during the night and each time he was sound asleep.

My nursery is very far from my room to travel on foot...BUT it is right above my bed room. We have a "cat walk" that you look down on the first floor from the second so it is open enought to hear him, but our master is on the first floor and the stairs to the upstairs are clear on theother side of the house.

When the Ped said "where do you see yourself in 6 months???" that was the only thing that actually got me thinking FOR US this was the thing to do...

Thank you all for your encouragment...it is a amazing to have such a resource-that you can have a thought, worry,concern, or great thing to share and to wake up with a good 10 friends cheering you on...
Love ya,

[lizamann]

I'm still impressed! Way to go Tristan! I am REALLY interested in this topic since we are co-sleeping too. I don't know anyone else IRL who is, so it's nice to see that there are many here that do. I've been trying to transition her to the crib lately, but I'm not sure my heart is in it yet. What your ped said about 6 months from now is great food for thought!

[mama2be]

We used it all of the time in the beginning before I brought him to our bed...funny you mention it because last night we did try him in it near our bed, but he was just a handful in general.

I had bought the jumper that goes witht he amby, so you remove the "bed" to put the jumper on...due tot hat we have been bad at not putting hte bed back on to use it. In other words you have to re set it back up...jsut seconds...but we have been bad with that.

I wish I used it more...baby number 2 will be in that a lot more than t was...

But atthe beginning the amby was a god send.
Tristan likes to sleep on his side and tha amby I think prevents that, if I gave it more of a chance he might beable to find a way to side sleep in it. I fault myself for not giving him the chance...

[mama2be]

That is not totally unsual when in our bed BUT wonder if he's mad at mommy and just doesn't want to "join her" this morning.

I have to remember Rachel's post "should I wake her" and all of the feed back "no"...:)

[amp]

Sounds like success to me! Pat yourself on the back for being a strong mommy. It's only natural that you want to scoop him up and soothe him when he wimpers! I do the exact same thing. But then he finally slept and he was "sleeping soundly" everytime you checked him after that. Great job soothing him enough to sleep comfortably in his own bed!

[stillplayswithbarbies]

Just to give another perspective . . . if I am asked that question by my ped at 6 months, (which I doubt I will be since it's none of his business where my child sleeps but that's another topic), my answer will be different. My answer would be "in 6 months? still sleeping with us of course. In 18 months, same answer. etc."

My first coslept for years. I don't remember when he stopped totally. Even until he was 6 years old or so, he would come in when he woke up in the morning and lay down in my bed and turn on the tv to watch cartoons. (letting me sleep later since I didn't have to worry about him being downstairs alone)

For me and my family, cosleeping works on an extended basis. I'm not saying this is for everyone, but I do want to mention it in case there are people who are still cosleeping and somehow feeling bad about it. You are not alone. :)

Whatever works for you and your family is what you should do.

...Karen
Jacob Nathaniel Feb 91
Logan Elizabeth Mar 03

[mama2be]

I heard the wake up sigh...and it is taking everything in me to not run and greet him and hug him and pull him up in my arms...but I jsut glanced in at him and he is on tummy...lips puffed up (he does that when studying things-I LOVE IT) and is studying what is around him, the bumper, toy...I'm letting him get used to it and to see what is in there-
OH so hard I always say "welcome to your morning" when he wakes up BUT really want him to have his time with his bed...

I hope I'm doing the right thing...not a sound coming from there...the canopy allows me to peek and him not notice :)...

[etwahl]

wow, it sounds like the transition is a success. good for you :)

Tammy,
Mom to Lauren Genevieve
03/12/2003
www.evantammy.com

[Momof3Labs]

Neve, if it is the right thing for your family, then you are doing the right thing! It doesn't sound like Tristan was too traumatized (not as much as Mommy) and it is a great sign that he slept until his usual time of the morning. Someone mentioned a lovey - this is a great time to introduce one. Colin has a blankie that my mom knitted for him, and I don't know exactly when he got attached to it, but it is so sweet to peek in on him and see him with it tucked under his face or under his arm. When I put him down, if he feels his blankie, he settles right down. If he doesn't, he reaches around for it until he finds it.

[starrynight]

Sounds like things are going well. It's much harder on you than Tristan at this age,but if you wait until a year or later it will be harder on him and it will be harder to break him of the habit. I learned this the hard way with my son, we had only planned on it for a few months, then it became a year and then 3 years! I see nothing wrong with that if YOU want it but we didn't! And it was much much harder to keep him out of our bed as he got older.

[alkagift]

Oh, Neve--right there with you girl. Matthew slept in a bassinet right by my side at night and although he slept in his crib for naps for the last month, at night he was right there. Well, he's grown out of the bassinet and we had to put him in the crib. I was crushed (even putting him back in the bassinet after the mid-night feeding), but he seemed fine and has happily enjoyed his sailboat bumpers, the mobile, and the quiet room. *sigh*. We gave our loaner basssinet back this weekend, so no more part-time with mommy at night--full nights in the crib.


Allison
Mommy to Matthew, 5/19/03

[mama2be]

Love his little avatar ...he sounds like he is doing super!!!

[ginalc]

LOL! My DD is 13 years old and has a GF who STILL sleeps with her Mom almost every night. She's 14 years old now. Can't imagine sleeping with a 14 year old in my bed!!! :)

gina, mom to 3

[alkagift]

Thanks! I need a new avatar, he's changed so much in the last month!

Allison
Mom to Matthew Clayton, 5/19/03

[JMarie]

Congrats Neve! It is harder on Mommy - I think especially since T is so far (walking distance-wise...) in his room from you. Honestly though, Aidan's right next door to us, and it's still hard to leave him in there. You're a great Mom and I'm sure Tristan will do fine, in your bed or his. It sounds like he did just fine last night...

Pull out the sexy nightgowns!

Jennifer
Mom to Aidan Christopher
01/28/03

[mama2be]

OH gosh I haven't finished reading all the post but can't think of anything I've read yet that would make anyone feel bad about co-sleeping. If there is anything that I say over and over is "to each his own"...I could care a less if soemone wraps their child's butt in a newspaper...I honestly don't come to these boards to critque what anyone does NOR DO I COME TO GET CRITIQUED...my life is too full to do that. I really think the day folks (WOMEN) embrace eachother in anything and everything they do (especially women here who all 100% have their childs best interest at heart or they wouldn't be drawn to such a board) we will be a stronger person.

So your perceptive is 100% OK by me...but this thread started by me was regarding trying to deal with T's crib change and what we are going thru...and sure glad I have gotten input it has helped...

More babies are living in grass huts, walking miles and miles with their moms to get water (that isn't even drinkable) a day in this world than babies that are living in air conditioned homes with the internet. I'd put my time and efforts trying to "help" those gals vs making anyone feel like they have to question how they feed, sleep, carry, bathe etc... their child.