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View Full Version : Is 2 yrs old too young to be a flower girl?



cdlamis
10-20-2003, 05:57 PM
Hi-
Julia has been asked to be the flower girl in a wedding one day before her 2nd birthday. We said yes and it's a go- I am just wondering how she will do at that age. Is this too young? What is your experience? I know every child is different- I am just curiuos.
Thanks!
Daniella
Mom to Julia 6-13-02
http://www.shutterfly.com/osi.jsp?i=67b0de21b32dc745c42b

COElizabeth
10-20-2003, 06:12 PM
It's pretty young! My 2.5 year old niece was just in my husband's sister's wedding, and her mom had to walk down the aisle with her, because at the last minute she refused to go down the aisle alone. And in general, I would say this girl is fairly mature and would be as likely to do it as anyone. If the bride and groom are comfortable knowing that something like that might happen, then it's fine, and I'm sure Julia would be adorable. But if they aren't willing to accept the possibilty of her not performing exactly as planned, then they need a much older child!

Elizabeth, Mom to James, 9-20-02

egoldber
10-20-2003, 06:31 PM
I agree with Elizabeth. The likelihood of a new two being able to follow directions well is pretty slim. As long as they are comfortable with that, it could be cute and kinda fun. But if they want the wedding to be "just so", then it may not be a good idea.

HTH,

bluej
10-20-2003, 06:46 PM
I agree w/ the others that it depends on the expectations of the bride and groom. I didn't have particularly young flower girls (ages 4 & 5) but I knew not to expect them to stand up there the entire time and behave like angels, so I had them walk down the aisle in their pretty dresses, turn and smile at the people while I walked down the aisle and then as we took our places they went and sat w/ their parents.

edited to add: Pictures pictures pictures! We want to see pictures as soon as you have the dress!

C99
10-20-2003, 09:28 PM
You'll be walking her down the aisle! A friend of mine had another friend's 2-y/o in her wedding a few years ago and the girl, who is normally fairly forward and even brazen, got freaked out at the long aisle and all the people and would only walk down with her mother. And she wanted to walk before it was her "turn," and screamed when the MOB wouldn't let her. I know every kid is different, but my friend had 3 flower girls (2, 5 and 6, I think) and only 1 of them made it down the aisle unassisted and/or without tears.

August Mom
10-20-2003, 09:56 PM
My niece was just over 2 when she was in my BIL's wedding. I thought it was a bad idea when I heard about it because she was so young. It turned out fine (and her mom didn't walk down the aisle with her). They practiced for weeks and put on her dress several times before the big day to get her used to the idea. Her mom stayed in the vestibule with her to get her to go down the aisle at the right time. After going down the aisle, she sat in a pew with her grandparents. There was only one small snaffu. She wanted to pick up all the petals that she had dropped after the ceremony. Apparently when they practiced, she always picked up the petals and then tossed them out of the basket again and she was insistent that she needed to pick them up. :)

cdlamis
10-20-2003, 10:47 PM
Oh great! I am the shyest person around and I can't imagine having to wlk down the aisle! At least all eyes won't be on me but on my sweet little girl.
Thanks for the advice. The bride/groom are good friends of mine and they know that 2 yrs old is a little young and that she may not go alone. As a joke, the groom kept calling and bugging us every week to see if Julia was walking yet since she was a late walker at 15 1/2 months.
I will definitely post pictures when we get her dress.
Daniella
Mom to Julia 6-13-02
http://www.shutterfly.com/osi.jsp?i=67b0de21b32dc745c42b

luvbeinmama
10-20-2003, 11:39 PM
Just a thought... don't know if this would help... but if one parent is up front on the aisle for her to go to, and one is waiting with her to say "go to daddy/mommy now", it may help her to go down by herself.

mom2kandj
10-21-2003, 12:12 AM
DD and another cousin(20 mon) were in a wedding in April. I wasn't too sure, but it went ok. My crazy cousin(the bride) put the two girls in a wagon and had the poor ringbearer(4 yo) pull them up the aisle with a push from his 6yo brother! :) I made sure the girls were seated before he started pulling, and then raced up the side to intercept the wagon at the front. Thank goodness the wedding was outdoors and I had room to turn it around before they had to go back down the aisle. Lucky for us, both girls sat in the wagon for the ceremony as I had hidden a snack (graham crackers)for them in the wagon! My DD did very well with the whole experience as we did practice beforehand. Going to the rehearsal and meeting the other kids also made her at ease! HTH!


Rose
mom 2 Katie (34 months)
& Jack (18 months)

vikivoly
10-21-2003, 01:18 AM
As a professional photographer, I've seen my share of flowergirls. I've NEVER seen a two year old walk down without any complications unless they were accompanied by an older sibling or someone they knew and trusted. Don't think that just because she does good at the rehearsal, she'll do ok at the ceremony. Guest-filled pews change everything!

However, as others have posted, it doesn't necessarily ruin the ceremony. My experience has been, if the FG is close to the couple and they just adore her, they don't care. If she is just a good friend and a cute face for pictures - they are annoyed by the chaos. So definitely ask them how they'll feel when she stops dead in her tracks in the middle of the aisle, throws her basket of flowers on the floor and starts screaming.

BTW, pictures will be a nightmare!

himom
10-21-2003, 03:53 AM
I'v seen the "walk to Mommy" (or Daddy, Grandma, etc) experiment at a few weddings and it worked relatively well at two of them. One wedding was not so lucky. The little boy clung to his Grandma at the top, and as soon as she let go of him and nudged him toward his mom he sprinted down the aisle as fast as his little legs could go! Fortunately, the B&G took it in stride and the rest of us thought it was really cute.

Just be prepared for anything and make sure B&G have a sense of humor. :)

Jodi
Mommy to Joshua, born February 2003

AngelaS
10-21-2003, 05:59 AM
Adrienne was a flower girl in my SIL's casual wedding at 17 months. :) She held hands with the ring bearer and walked to the front, where the pastor gave her a small toy (his idea!) and then she walked over to me and sat with me thru the service.

It went flawless but she was a very cooperative kid at 17 months. Gabrielle at 17 months is NO WHERE near so cooperative!!

sugarsnappea
10-21-2003, 07:26 AM
My Julia did it at 18 months. I expected the worst, especially when the wedding coordinator was telling me exactly what she should do! However, everything turned out perfect. It was my sister's wedding and I was the Maid of Honor. I held her hand walked down the aisle with her and "dropped her off" with Daddy. I really expected her to be terrible and grouchy the whole time. But she loved all the attention and that little basket was the perfect toy! :)

MartiesMom2B
10-21-2003, 07:39 AM
Daniella:

It sounds like you know the bride and groom pretty well, and they know Julia. As long as they know that anything can happen, and I think that those anythings are very cute, everything should be fine.

My nephew was 2 when he was our ringbearer. He went down the aisle fine with my 9 year old cousin, who was the flower girl. It's when my SIL who was a bridesmaid went down the aisle and stood up front he ran to her yelling "That's my mommy!" It was pretty funny, and his babysitter got him right away.

Sonia
Proud Mommy to Martie 4/6/03

cara1
10-21-2003, 09:15 AM
The only thing I'd wonder about if it were my kid would be his temptation to EAT the petals. Does your DD do this kind of thing?

Tondi G
10-21-2003, 10:57 AM
My god daughter was 2 and the flower girl in our wedding!!!! She was GREAT! I suppose it totally depends on the child and I was totally ready to not have a flower girl if in the moment she just couldn't do it!!!! She did a wonderful job!!!! Her grandma was practicing with her for a couple of weeks before the wedding... telling her how important her job was and they used torn up tissue and a basket and she dropped "petals" down the hallway at home!!!! She was so into it..... in fact she got to the end of the aisle and ran out of petals so she started picking some up off the ground so she could throw more!!!!!! She also walked down the aisle with my Sister, Maid of honor so she could be sure she was going the right way etc!!!! It was a very special thing to me and I absolutely love the pictures of her and my sister talking a bit as they walked down the aisle!!! We didn't expect her to sit up in the front with us through the ceremony so when she got to the end of the aisle she ran around and sat with her grandma (mom was in the wedding party!). I was amazed at how well she did it....... it was her brother, the ring bearer, who was 6 at the time who was the diappointment....... he decided he had a headache at then last minute... too much running around I suppose!!!!

If you practice a little with your daughter I think she'l be a great flower girl..... if it doesn't work out I am sure she will make for some adorable pictures with the bride in her pretty little dress!!! You might want to talk to the brode and groom and let them know you can't guarantee she will come through.... are they planning on another flower girl as well??? If so I bet your daughter will walk with another little girl no problem!

GOOD LUCK!!!!

~Tondi
Mommy to Mason(2) and #2 edd 6/6/04

khakismom
10-21-2003, 12:31 PM
Kathleen was 18 months when she was the flower girl at my brother's wedding. She walked down the aisle with my cousin and the MOH--and looked sooo adorable! The only way I would ever agree to do that again would be to look at the time of the wedding, and make sure she got a nap. The wedding started at her bed time and she never got a nap that day because we were too busy taking pictures. I would also hire a sitter for the day to watch her etc., because my whole family was busy with other details and places we had to be. I was a bridesmaid so I had my own schedule set by the bride, PLUS DH was a groomsman and he had his places to be set up by my brother. It was crazy!!

I've attached a pic of Kathleen with my brother and SIL--so you can see just how cute your Julia will look in a flower girl dress!! :) Have fun!

sntm
10-21-2003, 03:25 PM
one thing that I've heard of people doing so Julia will have less "pressure" on her is using a really gorgeous pram that is decorated and having her pushed down the aisle. then all she has to do is toss the flowers.

man, wouldn't it be great if you could rent a fancy silver cross for events like that? someone ought to look into that...

shannon
not-even-pregnant-yet-overachiever
trying-to-conceive :)
PREGNANT! EDD 6/9/03
mama to Jack 6/6/03